The Rest is Still Unwritten

finally a comic I can relate to

Do you ever just have those moments where you’re like, ‘fuck I really am mentally ill’ and you realised how disordered you are and how fucked up all your perceptions are. It’s such an odd feeling, like really recognising your pain and at the same time being detached from it and feeling almost objectively curious about it

c. 1890 Postcard

HAPPY NEW YEAR GO INTO THE SOUP

2018 mood: put me in the fucking soup!!!!!

please don’t call your genitals weird things like “dinky doo” or “no no carrot” like I’m not even gonna give a reason please just stop doing that

well isn’t that just a kick in the danger clam

me when i see a cat: CAT! cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat

Fun fact: when I see cute animals, I forget English and automatically revert to my native Hungarian. I don’t know what bystanders make of me, reciting guttural gibberish to rabbits.

But the real question is, what are you SAYING to the rabbits? Is it ‘RABBIT! rabbit rabbit rabbit rabbit rabbit rabbit bunny bunny bunny awww cute bunnyyyyy’?

Well, I usually say the Hungarian equivalent of ‘bun bun bun lil bun look at your tiny spoon-shaped ears awww bun brave little lawnmower bun’, but sometimes I say ‘hey rabbits, my sister’s gonna go to med school’ because I think everyone should know.

I live in Japan, and I always revert to English to talk to small animals, and I was cooing at this tiny little fluff machine of a puppy in baby english like “hello you’re so cute such a cute hello hello yess you’re good” and the 70 year old Japanese lady that was walking him started to *translate the baby talk english into Japanese* for her pup. She wanted to be sure he understood it too.

ACCURATE.

this looks like a traffic cone strapped to a swan

Blocked

god released me into the wild and now he’s hunting me for sport

My name is Junie B. Jones and the B stands for BACK ON MY BULLSHIT