Someday I Will Meet Dan And Phil

me giving relationship advice: dump him lol

This is the most accurate gif of Florida I have ever seen.

 ”What the fuck?” 

She’s not even scared, she’s just mad and confused.

baby gators are basically confused sharp bunnies who wander into other people’s pools for a dip and some sunbathing and might gnaw on u. mommas are the scary ones.

confused sharp bunnies

i’d argue that you don’t even have to worry about mommas.  alligators are literally stoners.  like don’t fuck with their stuff and they’ll just chill and leave you alone.

i grew up in florida. i was riding my bike once and managed to fall over and into a swamp full of gators and they just stared at me like ‘what the fuck did you do that for?’ they are some of the calmest creatures ever.

Alligators have not evolved in two hundred million years.  They’re too lazy.

“k”, “ok”, and “okay” are 3 very different things

WHERE IS YOUR GOD NOW, GENDER ROLES?

This is actually probably the best way to do things.

Put a baby changing station in each of them & we’ve got a grand slam.

a wild amazingphil appears

If you’re a guy who likes looking at pictures of naked girls but loses respect for a girl if she posts a naked picture of herself, you can get lost

How many times can I reblog this

never enough

oh….shit..

wow…

I never scroll pass this photo.. This is humanity, a lot of people can learn from this picture.

none pizza with left beef

It should be a rule of Tumblr to always reblog none pizza with left beef

ive missed you

#THIS IS MY FAVORITE FUCKING THING JUST THE BEEF#YOU COULD TELL THE POOR CHEF WAS JUST FUCKING#DISGUSTED#WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS#WHAT THE F U C K IS THIS#WHO THE FUCK ORDERS A#A /NONE/ PIZZA?? JUST BEEF ON THE LEFT???#FUCK IT#F U CK IT#JUST COOK THE FUCKING DOUGH#HERE LET ME THROW THIS FUCKING HANDFUL OF OBLONG BEEF CHUNKS AT YOUR NONE FUCKING PIZZA#FUCK YOU#FUCK YOU AND ALL YOU STAND FOR#LEFT FUCKING BEEF (via askscientistcarlos)

I love None Pizza with Left Beef.

3th time i’ve reblogged this

3th

tumblr people love this. reddit people love this. 4chan scum loves this. there is just something intrinsically hilarious about none pizza with left beef. bless