This too, shall pass

Definitely. I fancy/ fancied a lot of the lovely girls I’ve talked to on here. A lot of them have unfortunately deleted their accounts or deactivated or are inactive. I hope all of them are doing great in life and are happy.

alexisperplexis

kn1ghtlife

flyawayh0me

asphyxxiatte 

phoen-ixs

essie-grace

I should have opened my mouth, moved my lips, spoken my mind, began a mundane yet humorous sentence of a self introductory nature, uttered an apology for bumping into her while she was crossing the road, asked her where she was headed at the bus stop or whether we were headed in the same direction, made small talk, something...anything to her when she glanced at me. But i didn't.. 

Now, i'm sat here at 1 am trying to figure out what was it about her that made me notice her. It seemed like nothing about her stood out, but at the same time everything did? Was it the clothes? No, couldn't have been. She was just wearing a simple black top and a pair of ashen lead jeans. Was it the face? Well, she was pretty in a simplistic manner, make-up not overdone, lipstick closely matched the shade of the real lips, basic eye liner. But i have to admit, it was basic but it was well done. She was a beauty in simplicity. Was it the earphones? Maybe she likes music. She wasn't wearing generic-bundled-with-the-phone earphones, so at least she liked music to a point that invested in a way to hear it though proper channels. Was it the hair? No, it was tied into a bun, along with a hair clip. The curls that hadn't been fastened by the claws of the hair clip, dangled on her neck. They fell really gracefully. (I only noticed this since i was walking behind her, and we seemed to be heading in the same direction).

We alighted from the train at the same time, though from different train compartments. I noticed her was soon as i turned around to establish a general sense of direction. It had been a long time since i had been on this train station. She had a certain je ne sais quoi about her. She maneuvered through the crowds of people so well, so briskly, while the sea of people around her just walked idly and slowly. After walking a certain distance we reached the bus stop. A bus was arriving from the directing we were facing. We both leaned to see what the destination of the bus was. Since i was so focused to see the bus, as was she, i bump into her stationary body. It wasn't the bus we were looking to board. I mutter an inaudible apologetic "sorry" under my breath. I don't think she noticed i said something.

We marched on to the bus depot, to wait there for the bus. As soon as i take a few more steps i see the bus i wanted to board. It was already boarding passengers. I ran towards it in a bid to catch it while it was still parked. I boarded the crowded bus, found a place to stand fairly comfortably. I waited for her to board, but she didn't. This wasn't the bus leading to her destination.

The irony was that the soundtrack to all this was the Deafheaven album, Sunbather. The album rife with lyrics pertaining to lost love, grief and other dark emotions, really did make me feel worse yet somewhat hopeful as the bus drove into the night, through all the noise and the traffic and the bustle.