Murray's Mustard Beats

tfw you are the genetically engineered version of every great leader in one body and the son of the greatest vessel pilot earth has ever seen who flew the greatest spaceship earth has ever created across the great vacuum to a giant dust ball in order for a few million people to colonize in order to preserve humankind and further its space footprint only to have your closet and most trusted advisers turn on you once you nearly single handed in creating not one but 4 major centers across the planet, created millions of jobs and provided water and food for everyone while also maintaining power and balance between the rapidly growing new population split between 4 cities and 4 different cultures, then 300 years after you betrayal when all you hard work is coming undone because the people who betrayed you cant even maintain their own technological fortress that controls the entire planet then clones gives you a new identity, and forces you to fix their problems re-unite the planet again and hand control over to them but in the process you discover who you really are start a rebellion against the false leaders to try and regain power and continue what you should of done 300 years ago but in the process you contract a serious case a cancer and die a slow death while you watch you birth right slip away again,

So Serjio was telling me how a person can survive for up to 40 minutes with their belly cut open. I asked him how he knew and he just mumbled something about war or whatever. I didn’t believe him and being the top notch guy Serjio is he proved it to me. I think he broke the record, made it to the 50 minute mark. RIP Serjio.

Saying you can clean anyone’s pipes anytime on job forums gets you some very odd responses. I’m not one to turn down a good paying Job though. 

Living on the streets is fine, so long as you can speak the same language. Luckily for me I meet a kind fellow named Serjio who can speak American. Serjio has taught me a many of things, like don’t walk bare foot down alley ways, the 3 second rule doesn’t count at a homeless shelter and sometimes wet cardboard is all you need to make sure your body doesn’t eat itself from hunger. This one is for you Serjio!

So as it turns out, pretending that you are a refugee and trying to smuggle yourself into Europe is a great way to get detained and held in government custody for 3 weeks. On the plus side i lost 25kgs!

Sometimes I forget to blink for so long I start to see shadows peel themselves off the walls and dance around my room like a dark fire, but then I remember  I’m legally blind. How am I even typing?

Eating 2 liters of honey and watching bee video’s youtube is a great way to spend weekend. So is listening to music. 

Who doesn’t love something that sounds like it was made on a factory floor. And its Two Fingers Tobin!

It’s low, gritty and reminds me that I will never do anything worth while.

Have a listen to this fat piece of very interesting music. I really enjoy the parts that have sound.