this profile is not minor friendly. this is your only warning. outlast contains dozens of horrific and disturbing themes, including (but not limited to) religious malignancy, medical malpractice, sexual terror, multiple forms of abuse, physical and mental torture, mutilation, and murder. minors found interacting with my account will be blocked.
this is only meant to be an introductory post so i'll keep it as brief as possible.
MDNI banner by @/cafekitsune.
guten tag, all! i may be referred to as cain (they/she). i'm a nineteen year-old psychology/history double-major who stumbled upon the outlast trials and has known no peace since.
mostly this account is for rambling, interacting with fellow fans, and sharing ocs. i may entertain "x reader" ideas since i do love writing, but they won't be your traditional imagines or headcanons. given the intense content of outlast as a whole, i personally dislike writing romance or smut of such severely traumatized and violence individuals, and so will not do so! any reader-insert content i post will center around the psychological consequences of being exposed to the murkoff corporation and its assets.
please do not come into my askbox talking about how cute, sweet, or attractive the prime assets are 🙏 i'm not shaming anyone, especially because i loathe purity culture and censorship—however i am not a huge fan of the mischaracterization that's done in a lot of the works i've seen and i can't put aside or ignore these characters' crimes in order to thirst for them ;w;.
that aside! please interact, i'd love to make mutuals :)
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I don't think I've ever said it outright but I might've in passing, but after WW2 Clara's husband was retired for his work in the army and clara remaind a nurse until her "accident"(he beat her) he claimed she was hysteric and had her emitted to mount massive, she spent several years there till Easterman needed a nurse🫶
ADHD affects how I experience time, not how I experience attachment. I love you. I miss you. I just don't realize how long it’s been since I last said that, let alone messaged.
I understand that most normal functioning brains need regular engagement to maintain a bond. Absence doesn’t diminish my affection. My silence isn’t neglect or disinterest. It’s time blindness and object impermanence. The contact gap is purely neurological, not emotional. Thank you for being patient with my inconsistency and holding a seat in your heart for me.
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i love ooc fanon outlast bc of the comfort but i fear every time i see a post abt franco being a girl dad i just think abt his immense misogyny and perversion and i'm like 😀
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you know confirming gooseberry is a woman liker with the sex toy playboy bunny goon cave was not. was not on my bingo card but i fuck with it heavy and immeasurably so at that. she is a god damn horndog probably more than anyone else she just has so much deep repression issues due to her upbringing. LET HER PUSSY OUT
okay. i feel the need to bring attention to arora's role in the trials. everyone overlooks her genius so unendingly it's almost hurtful. arora is the reason why the trials are what they are. arora is responsible for the existence of the psychosis gas and thus for the skinnerman— which is to say, she is responsible for the existence of easterman's egregore and the root of the psychological influence of the trials at large. she is responsible for easterman's descent into drug addiction due to the sheer quality of her formulations, and thus for the descent into madness (and corresponding ascent into effectiveness) sinyala has experienced. she is undoubtedly responsible for countless chemical breakthroughs in the larger world that were so completely widespread they became nearly invisible. leland coyle, poor and rural, knew about the quality of her pharmaceutical syntheses. she had to teach herself japanese to converse with the only person on her level, and she did so seemingly without struggle. her father relied on a formula that was implicitly hers in his attempt to kill her. even if it was not hers, the antidote was, and she was enough of a surgeon to save her own life, along with otto's. she was enough of a surgeon to save her father's life— sawn in half from groin to chops (ha) and sewn back together upside down, he lived for weeks with her help. she is ridiculously accomplished.
this, by all means, does not mean that otto is a vestige. otto is the means by which she was empowered to pursue her career as successfully as she did. otto is what allows her to keep going. otto is an accomplished politician and publicist, a phenomenal speaker and writer, and, by all means, an even better lover. i just delight in thinking about the mud that the trials would be stuck in without the twins. i genuinely think that sinyala could function more smoothly without easterman than it could without them.
how does anyone look at gooseberry and go yeah idk i think she's white. like it talks about how she underwent dermatological experimentation while at holmesburg--where doctor albert klingman, a REAL DERMATOLOGIST, performed unethical experiments on BLACK INMATES starting in 1951, in which he exposed them to a plethora of diseases such as herpes, athlete's foot, and staphylococcus. ALSO his wiki even says that his subjects gained a sliver of economic power that some of them used to "coerce sexual favors from other inmates" (while i don't understand exactly what the wiki means by this, i believe it could relate to phyllis' relations with both guards and other inmates).
idk about the other two games but with outlast trials, it's HISTORICAL fiction. you have to research the time frame that the character's stories are happening in!!
anyway this is a long winded way of saying if you draw phyllis white... im side-eyeing you
asking the council (fandom) if there are any words used in the PAs dialogue that i (especially as a white person) should not say 🙏 i wrote some prime time dialogues for an oc and want to make sure they're like. not slurs CRIES
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discussions of canon-typical violence, religious abuse, horror, etc.
a gimmick (or aesthetic?) swap!! im thinking it goes something like this
coyle -> father leland (swaps with liliya). more religious emphasis and less on cop culture, but maintains a close relationship with the military and electricity. instead of the cattle prod, he fashioned some sort of gloves to conduct electricity from his fingers to whatever he touches.
gooseberry -> lady futterman (swaps with the twins). a little less verbal and trial emphasis on children (instead explored via map details), but maintains her dental background, taxidermy interest, and personalities. instead of the futterman drill, she uses a nailgun (a reference to both arora's long distance attacks and otto's mechanical saw, as well as the victim in Cleanse the Orphans).
franco -> big brother barbi (swaps with gooseberry). less ageplay and "mommy" emphasis, but maintains his love-hate relationship with women, the teeth fixation, and overall nasty, incestual ravings. instead of calling people "mommy", he goes for "sissy", and instead of a gun, uses a modified bear puppet to attack people.
kress twins -> kreep twins (swaps with franco). less sexual freaky and more scary-freaky. having grown up in a literal freak show, they're deeply socially stunted and incredibly childish, but somehow still as entitled. arora uses a blow dart designed similarly to a party horn, while otto uses a hefty, comically-designed hammer.
liliya -> general-lieutenant liliya zmeeva (swaps with coyle). openly sadomasochistic and while still religious, is much more fixated on war, especially the erasure of germans/nazis, following her years as russia's angel of leningrad. not 100% sold on her weapon but i'm thinking a repurposed, barbed flail (a farming tool to represent her "humble beginnings", meant to reference coyle's job as public servicer).
amelia -> dr. collier (swaps with easterman). yeah
i took my sleep med while working on this so sorry it gets sparse towards the end </3 more... eventually