I was a really weird kid in middle and high school. Nobody thought I was cool or pretty, and in general, they didn’t really care about me. It sucks sometimes, but also kind of freeing. I was spending all of my time drawing, obsessing over whatever I was into at the time. Surely I wasn’t well-regulated but I was having fun. Now people like me. They think I am pleasant to look at and interacted with, but I am empty. I cannot go back to being weird, lest I risk my job and my only marketable quality. Is this something I must endure?

I kinda miss when I was weird and a geek. Nobody gave a shit about me and I can just do whatever I wanted in my own quiet corner. Nowadays my job required me to be normal, nice and easygoing so I can’t behave like that anymore. It is torturous.