"we" refers to anyone who is fighting beside me. self inclusion and self exclusion are copacetic concepts.

i understand the danger of generalizations but if you lean too far in the other direction you get people trying to establish a literal gay card and set of criteria that is Queer Enough.

here's some examples of how these phrases are used that i don't like:

"the queer community needs to remember our history!" which history? in practice, on tumblr at least, almost always the american lgbt movement. i think its wrong to imply that american queer history Is queer history, and not just the history of queerness in one corner of the world. i think expecting any and everyone to both know and be deferential to the history of the american lgbt movement just because they are queer and speak english, regardless of whether or not thats actually their history, is weird nationalist behavior.

"the trans community has too much infighting" this is a statement that serves to imply that trans people are not allowed to have or capable of having legitimate ideological conflict with each other. it's frequently used to paint trans women specifically as instigators of meaningless internet drama, and completely discredit the critiques they have of the way they're treated by people who are supposedly 'in community' with them

i think pretty much every time "the lesbian community" with no further qualifiers is rhetorically used in a discussion it's been at best meaningless but often actually harmful, because understanding of lesbian identity has long been pretty heavily split between people who are using bioessentialist ideas about who actually Counts as a lesbian and people who aren't. i am not in community with twerfs and never will be, and i think trying to understand or portray lesbianism as a "community" without factoring in these peoples' presence just throws trans women under the bus.

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