So sorry for being late to the party, but I'll do my best to catch up to the SxF Read Along!!
Oh boy, here we go :))))Â
Volume 1 is read quite differently for me from the rest of the story. It introduces some strongly independent characters, shows some deeply-traumatising backgrounds, sets everything up as a potentially very dramatic story and then subverts all expectations into a heart-warming found family situation where trauma meets trauma and somehow fits one into the other like jigsaw pieces to create an authentic painting of familial bonds. It creates a stark contrast to all other familial units, right from the first volume up to the latest one.
The first chapter introduces Twilight and Anya, arguably the most impactful characters of the series. The first is a man scarred by recurrent loss, frontline war experience and an uncanny intellect and manipulation abilities. He parallels Anya perfectly, a 5-year old orphan, the victim of child experimentation, outcast from family to family and with the burden of always knowing everyone elseâs thoughts and the moral guilt and responsibility this entails.
Twilight acquires a different view of the world, one that he can nurture and protect to help grow into what he envisions, as opposed to the usual manipulation and violence he mets out to forcefully carve his vision onto the world. One is patient and one is unrelenting. This beautiful conflict between the two strategies plagues him constantly over the course of the first chapter. He is used to inflicting direct change, using his cunning to steer others into doing his bidding as he believes is right for them to do. On the other hand, he now has Anya that also needs guidance and he recognizes he is the only one actually willing to commit to the effort. Â
He is willing because the future generationâs happiness and, by extension, Anyaâs happiness is his ultimate goal. Some will say that he lacks character since he can change himself according to what is needed for him to be, but this is his expression of selflessness, because he discarded his own ego during the thankless process of helping others. Thus, he becomes Anyaâs father from the first day of knowing her.Â
He does not recognise this fact in himself, as he still doesnât know what a good father is supposed to look like, hence the âkids manualâ and him asking Anya whether sheâs sure about staying with him rather than going to a better orphanage.
Anya herself is never sure of his commitment to her past Operation Strix. She is still a child, with limited ability to understand complex thought processes as well as the emotional turmoil Twilight is going through, particularly since he is exceptional at detaching any feelings from what heâs thinking. This way, Anya sees Twilight pretty much unidimensionally and she takes everything he thinks at face value. This makes for hilarious moments where Twilight is blindsided by Anyaâs fluctuations, as he is ignorant of the fact she merely responds to his thoughts, chalking it up to him not being a good father.
She is, however, already attached to him. She is a traumatised child, she hasnât known parental affection before and she idolises Twilight, seeing him as an exponent to her dear cartoon character Bondman. Past that, she also sees him as the voice of reason. More than what he willingly shares with her, Anya takes his thoughts and interpretations on serious matters as law. Operation Strix becomes her sole objective as well. Itâs easy for her as she is an adventurous and curious child, quite literally starved for entertainment. That is not to say she does not have her rebellious side to her. She knows quite well he does not want her meddling with any of his gear or that she should study, but she is not mature enough to rein in her excitement and act responsibly. Which is fully understandable, she is a literal 5-year old. Â
I love this chapter so much, its pacing and premise is a great hook for any audience and it also stands to summarise the most important themes of the series. The most prevalent theme is by far comedy. I would go as far as to say that all of the other themes also touch upon the comedic aspect in their presentation. You have the spy-thriller and expected tension during undertaken objectives and their subsequent subversion due to unpredictable outcomes, you have slice-of-life moments in which the domesticity gets challenged due to the charactersâ background. This volume sets the trend of the comedic clash between appearance and substance that becomes expected for the rest of the series.
Past that, the first chapter also helps the reader focus on whose story this is. At the end of the day, this is the story of Anyaâs family, to which Twilight stands as a foundation. He is the centrepiece of the ordinary life Anya is creating for herself.
And because a family is not complete without a mother figure, Yor is introduced soon enough. Chapter 2 gives a great snapshot into Yorâs mental state and her opinion of herself. The way she views other people is paradoxical, as she seems to be quite adept at understanding peopleâs emotions and picks up cues, but she fails to deliver in acting out societal expectations in response. Later on, we understand that she grew up without parental tutelage of social etiquette, in a remote locality where she wouldnât have had chances to pick up that knowledge, even at least in passing. Thus, she always feels âabnormalâ, even though she technically has nothing that much different going for her than other women. She herself feels like she should be capable of having ânormalâ relationships, to not stick out so much from other people, but, despite her best efforts, thereâs always something from her peculiar upbringing setting her apart from others.
This particular panel is poignant of how alien she feels, as if peering from an eyehole, separate from everyone else and incapable of bridging the distance. However, knowing how Yor develops from here, I can safely say that sheâs the one character that changed the most, almost making everyone else seem static by comparison. She has gained a family of her own, a tether to that ânormalâ world she has only thought about but never considered achievable. This became a new foundation for her and the conviction that she is capable of change, of becoming a ânormalâ person.
It is also evident that the extent of Twilightâs and Yorâs union was initially limited by their lifeâs purpose.Â
However, their goals evolve even during the short week or so that they are together. They donât necessarily change, but in addition to killing and spying, they have also discovered an until-then hidden aspect of their worldview, which was human connection. Before any romantic connotation, I think of Twilight having someone that knows him even when he has not an image tailored and Yor having someone to guide her through the societal pressures and accepting herself as she is.
The first time I read chapter 4 I didnât really think much of the scene where Anya comforts the downed bull. I chalked it up to Endo-sensei giving Anya something cute to do in the scene. But now, thinking back on this, it definitely has much more depth and adds more onto Anya as a person. This is a roughly 5 year old thatâs been brought up in the emotionally-harshest conditions, both as a test subject and in the orphanage, passed around homes that found her to be unsettling, never having had her empathy nurtured in any way past incidental interaction with other troubled kids or with shitty foster parents or with even shittier mad scientists. Yet in spite of all that, or maybe exactly because sheâs been at an abysmal low before, she has her first impulse to comfort and mend relationships. To put it even more into perspective, all she has been trained to do before wouldâve been quite literally the opposite, as a mind-reader asset for Ostaniaâs undercover operations.Â
I think this is a neat way to foreshadow Anyaâs role over the series. She is obviously the glue between all unlikely factors. Take Twilight and Yor as an example, they manage to make their cover-up family work due to Anyaâs intervention, because at the end of the day, unprompted, they would have been strangers in a marriage due to both of their propriety. This is also what makes Anya such a great character. After all the adversity she had to face, she still persevered and remained kind-hearted and hopeful.
Which kind of circles back to what Spy x Family is at its core. A story about kindness prevailing in the end. Of efforts eventually bearing fruit. Of loneliness being only momentary and a way to better cherish othersâ company. Of finding oneâs family in a world that is teeming with sad farewells.
Now, thinking a bit of how peculiar the trioâs interactions are due to their background, gotta love how Endo foiled Anyaâs telepathy from Twilight right off the bat. âShe is weirdly intuitive, almost as if sheâs reading my mind. Ha! Thatâs obviously just a coincidence, not as if whenever I ask her something remotely complicated she literally parrots back what Iâve been thinking of. She just has some strokes of genius from time to time.âÂ
Gotta love Twilightâs obliviousness towards whatâs right in front of him. As a spy heâs probably been trained to think only in logical terms and keep track of whatâs likely to happen, as needless panic over coincidences could compromise whole missions. Which is why he will never, ever guess that Anya can always read his mind and Yor is literally the Terminator in a red sweater. It wouldnât make sense, thus it cannot be. This ridiculously makes him the best and worst spy at the same time.
And thatâs all I had to say for this volume, I didnât want to go too much into what you canât glean off initially as Iâd like to have something to talk about in later chapters as well haha. Thank you for reading if youâve actually reached the end! Now, Iâd just like to pay homage to this legendary panel of Loid flipping over a mosquito (I also hate mosquitos, particularly if theyâre called Swan, relatable af).
gummygunk
dailybridgerton
stormborns
annaxmalina
turnnoffyourmind
