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d e v o n
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda

β£ Chile in a Photography β£
wallacepolsom
Xuebing Du
Not today Justin
AnasAbdin
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open

shark vs the universe
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todays bird
we're not kids anymore.
Cosmic Funnies

@theartofmadeline
Keni
Sweet Seals For You, Always
Today's Document

if i look back, i am lost
Show & Tell
styofa doing anything

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@moriimori
#kimetsunoyaiba
#nezuko

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do u ever remember all the horrible offensve things u said when u were like 15 and u literally feel ur soul detach and turn 2 dustΒ
your fave is problematic: yourself
Basically, yeah. Thatβs kind of the point β you always have to look back on yourself and be mortified and resolve to be better. Shit, the stuff I said just five YEARS ago (and Iβm almost 33) makes me cringe like a motherfucker. Burn in mortification. Rise from the ashes and be better. Lather, rinse, repeat for the rest of your life.
This is why purity culture doesnβt work!!! Weβre all shit! We can all grow and do better!
Burn in mortification. Rise from the ashes and be better.
βParticularly prone to serious procrastination problems are children who grew up with unusually high expectations placed on themβ¦or else they exhibited exceptional talents early on, and thereafter βaverageβ performances were met with concern and suspicion from parents and teachers.β
Holy SHIT
WELL THEN
Yep.
They actually tested me for a learning disability in high school because I was consistently failing math.
They discovered that I actually scored in the 80th percentile in that sort of learning.
Problem was, in every other subject, I was in the 99.8th percentile.
I had never learned how to study because I never needed toβand then, when something proved to be even the slightest bit challenging, my brain went
βLOL nope this is impossible abortβ
Meanwhile, this entire time Iβm scraping by in subjects like English. The assignments I did turn in, Iβd score top marksβbut Iβd avoid turning in projects I didnβt think were βgoodβ enough.
Essentially, my brain had two settings: β100%β or β0%β.
This sort of Baby Genius shit makes kids and adolescents neurotic and self-destructive.
We learned about this in Child Development. And we learned to reward hard work and not good job. Like donβt say to a child, βoh you are so smart.β Say βOh did worked so hard.β Be proud of the child, not the achievement.
Be proud of the child, not the achievement.
Decades of research have been done on this by Dr. Carol Dweck. When the emphasis is placed on effort (a factor people can control) rather than talent (an innate skill), itβs a lot easier to see mistakes as a learning opportunity rather than something you just wonβt ever be good at. And kids who were encouraged by effort were also more willing to take on more challenging work and considered it a lot more fun, while the kids who were praised for their intelligence were reluctant to put themselves in a situation where they might lose that identifier as aΒ βsmart kidβ by making mistakes, so they preferred to do work they were confident they could master. Also, the kids praised for effort wanted to compare their results to kids who got higher scores, to see where they made their mistakes, while those praised for intelligence wanted to compare their results to kids who scored lower, to reassure themselves.
Not only does this set up βsmartβ students for a lot of trouble when they enter college and start being regularly challenged, the effects last long beyond that. It can be very hard for theΒ βyouβre so smart!β kids to unlearn as they become adults and struggle with even common adult things, and are afraid to ask for help because of that lesson they learned from misguided praise that they are supposed to be smart and supposed to know the answers.Β
β¦Honestly +1 here. Β Itβs very well researched and documented and yeah. Β Making the emphasis onΒ βYou succeed and we are proud of you b/c you are SMART as an intrinsic quality!β makes failure/setbacks/difficulty -TERRIFYING- b/c if youβreΒ βsmartβ it doesnβt happen and if you fail that means youβre not smart and thatβs what everyoneβs drilled into you as your main point of worth.
And the rates of anxiety disorders among βgifted studentβ kids are kinda horrifying. Β Β
This is whyΒ βyouβre so smartβ means absolutely nothing to me any more. Itβs used as punishment as often as itβs used as praise.Β

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Pipefox
Project Saturday
Honebami and Namazuo Toushirou ππ
Onmyoji kids

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ArtΒ req for Pipurr369! hope you can see this lol
normal day~~~
a treecat
Mushroom bunny

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Ramona <3
Yukine