team free will

During @inevitably-johnlocked wonderful watchalong today the chat in our hilarious insanity began to notice similarities between Penguins of Madagascara and our favourite episode of Sherlock: The Final Problem. 

I found this whole concept hilarious to try and find as many parallels as I could. This is the shit post to end all shit posts for TFP and frankly, I laughed so much while making this that I almost peed. I hope this can help my friends to smile and heal from the train wreck that was The Final Problem. 

Let’s start at the beginning… Meet our two Villains. Dave, and Eurus. Masters of Disguise. 

Dave and Eurus also share the same trait of being a genius. Wow.

Oh look, similar themes… North Wind, meet East Wind.

Both villains are introduced in the most over the top horror-type dramatic fashion. 

But oh no! What’s this? Our heroes don’t remember our villain? Shame.

There’s an explosion, which our heroes miraculously escape from. 

Without even a scratch.

Our heroes steal a boat so they can get to our villain’s evil lair… 

A REMOTE ISLAND FORTESSS!

BUT… They need to sneak in, in disguise. 

Looks like Penguins won this round… Guess we don’t get to see Mycroft in a mermaid suit.

Where they are confronted by our villain via a TV

Our villains both have magic remote controls for their evil dastardly plans!!

And they both like to make things scary by switching all the lights to RED.

Always use nonlethal force to subdue heroes. Tranquilisers are a must for any budding super villain.

HOW DO YOU LAND THIS THING??

OH SHIT WE ALMOST FORGOT ABOUT THE BABY!!!!

What motivates our villains you ask? Why, it’s loneliness of course!

Oh hello sinister water… what are you doing here?

How do we defeat our villain? GIVE THEM A FRIEND, DUH!

Finally, we come to the moral of our stories… I think Penguins also wins this round. While TFP says: “Who you really are, it doesn’t matter.“ Penguins of Madagascar says:  “If there’s anything we’ve learned from this delightful adventure… Kowalski… It’s that looks don’t matter. It’s what you do that counts. And look at what you did. […] you are the most meaningful and valued member of this team.” Tags under the cut:

TFP = The Fucky Penguins, a Meta by Tali-Zora

Yes, Sherrinford Marine Park contains Sherlock’s Secret Octopus!

The Dreamworks version is still more believable than That Disaster.

Maybe they could have salvaged it by putting Mycroft in a mermaid suit.

On a scale of one to Adele, my breakup with Kendra is a solid 25. These past few days have been rough – like, downing-an-entire-jar-of-Nutella-while-binge-watching-Jane-the-Virgin rough. How much do I have to eat until the pain goes away? I thought I had finally found “the one,” but how on Earths could I possibly compete with a reincarnated love that transcends time? 

I decided to take a mental health day from S.T.A.R. Labs to wallow, but that’s not to say I wasn’t productive. I baked (and promptly ate) an entire batch of Abuela Ramon’s killer Everything-But-the-Kitchen-Sink cookies, wrote a love ballad for Kendra on my Vortex AX Synth Keytar, cyber-stalked Carter – aka Hawkman – to make sure he checked out (he’s never even had a parking ticket!), and rolled out the trusty yoga mat for some much-needed zen. I tried not to think about Kendra, but that was next to impossible. I mean, have you seen her? It’ll take loads of time and one of those flashy memory-wipers from Men in Black to get her out of my head. 

Barry came by after work to check up on me. Let me tell you, a grown man in Star Wars jammies crying his eyes out to Whitney Houston doesn’t make a pretty picture, but to Barry’s credit, he didn’t flinch. He even brought reinforcements: he sped off to Coast City for a stack of his favorite pizza (pepperoni, black olives, and jalapenos) and he brought along a bottle of Joe’s homemade whiskey – which, I learned after the fact, is 140 proof and should not be guzzled like orange soda. Had I been of rational mind, I would’ve asked Barry to hide my phone. The whiskey had me feeling all warm and fuzzy inside and imbued me with the confidence to call Kendra, leave a message declaring my undying love for her, and play her my Keytar ballad. Even The Flash wasn’t fast enough to stop me, but Barry did, at least, knock the phone out of my hand right before I broke into the rap. His look of horror brought me stone cold sober and those fuzzy feelings were replaced with sheer terror – Frak! What had I done? 

I ran to my computer and pulled all the stops on my hacking skillz (which was incredibly challenging as I was, at this point, seeing triple). I located Kendra’s phone signal via GPS (she’d left town with Carter and was out near St. Roch) and Barry sped off to retrieve her phone, erase the incriminating voicemail, and return the device safely to her pocket before she even knew what had happened. Crisis averted. We celebrated with a few more rounds of whiskey before I curled up in the fetal position on the sofa and drifted off to sleep, during which I had the sweetest dream of Kendra flying her way back into my life. 

Okay… I saw this and the first thing I picture was Dean and Cas portraying the Call Me Maybe music video and I think that made my day.