Miles Cook

“A list,” he looked at her and slowly realized that he’d misinterpreted her meaning. A common occurrence for him as he was generally practical and took most things and what she said at face value. He was never that adept at finding the hidden meaning behind someone’s words. He was getting better at times but there were moments, like now, where he thought he’d known what she wanted and turned out it was different. 

Her next request was even more difficult. Not because he couldn’t make it out but because he understood her too clearly and it was just a topic that he wasn’t all that interested in sharing. “You really want to know?” He felt like if he knew the same of her it would only instill more jealousy in him. Perhaps that was what she wanted. Maybe she enjoyed feeling jealous at times. Or maybe it was as simple as just wanting to know what her partner had been up to while they were apart. 

“Well if you must know,” he pressed her closer against him, “You didn’t miss much. Just a one-night stand in the dark.” He bent his knees slightly so he could reach his hands beneath her thighs and lift her easily, helping her legs to wrap around his middle for added support. “It actually made me realize how much I missed you.”

        “Of course I do,” Bella smiled. It didn’t seem so odd to her that she wanted to be jealous, she wanted him to be jealous to. “There’s a difference between problematic jealousy and jealousy that just shows how much I like you.” Her jealousy of Ruby had been problematic, her jealousy of Beth definitely was, but of the women he’d had one night stands with? No, she’d never be truly hurt by them, or hurt them. “Why is jealousy so hard for you?”

“Shit,” Miles swore under his breath when he heard the low mutterings coming from the man before them. Fucking magic. Before he had a chance to call out to Maya to stay back, the magic coiled in the air between them and burst, knocking him backwards and causing him to loose his footing and land hard on his back. The fall forced the air out from his lungs and he gasped hard to regain the oxygen he’d suddenly lost. Stars danced in the corners of his eyes and when he pushed himself back up the man was gone, running off down the road with Maya’s shadow in tow, scrambling around on the ground beside his own shadow. 

“You okay?” Miles went to Maya’s side, quickly checking to make sure she hadn’t been badly hurt. “Come on,” he ushered her up and started running after the witch. Miles was faster than Maya, werewolf genes and all, and faster than the witch, so it wasn’t long before he caught up to the witch.

It was curious but Maya’s shadow seemed to be clinging to the witch’s shadow. She clung onto it’s shoulders and pulled at it’s hair and the witch howled in pain and stumbled. Maya’s shadow was fighting the witch’s shadow and it was somehow affecting the real witch. 

“Fucking…come here!” Miles grabbed the witch’s coat and pulled him to a stop, wresting his arms behind his back. The wooden box fell to the ground. “Stop fucking moving!” He growled at the witch as he attempted to restrain him. 

As per usual, Maya didn’t have as much luck as she’d like. She soon found herself knocked on her ass by a blast of magic. “Dumbass,” she muttered as she pulled herself to her feet. It hurt, sure, but she’d been hit worse before. When Miles came rushing over, Maya waved off. “I’m a little tougher than that,” she said, “I’m good.” 

They took off after the man. Miles, with his werewolf superpowers, caught up to him first. If she was honest with herself, she was a little disappointed by that. If she’d gotten there first she might’ve gotten a good left hook in. Something she was still fairly certain that Miles as a cop would frown on. When she did skitter to a stop though, she had to smile. Her shadow was just as scrappy as the real version of her. 

“Of course not,” Miles responded to Maya’s question about getting arrested, “It was all within the course of the job, he was resisting arrest, you’re allowed to give him a punch or two, especially since it’s your own shadow that he stole. Speaking of,” he nodded his head toward the separate shadow entity beside her, “I don’t suppose you have any idea how we can get you two back together?” 

        Bella laughed gently, her nose at his cheek as she did. Miles was…so sweet. “You’re being very very descriptive,” she complimented, still giggling to herself. What he was doing was not what she had meant but it wasn’t wrong either, and Bella was done being mad, it was easier to laugh at his practical assessment of her request, reminding her of the time she’d asked him to describe his day at work and he’d not known exactly what to say to excite her.

          She leaned back down, heels hitting the balcony’s tiles and she sucked in her bottom lip to keep from giggling. “Maybe less descriptive,” she suggested, her fingers still at his hair. “Maybe prouder. A longer list,” Bellamy continued but realistically if Miles was not understanding her meaning, that she wanted him to seduce her with his ability to support her, then she wasn’t going to be upset, some stuff just wasn’t for him and eventually she’d work out all those things more completely so she’d know what would work.

           “Or you could tell me what you got up to while we were apart?” she altered her direction. “I would love to know what I should be envious of.” A grin appeared on her face as she looked up at him, form pressed to his. “What moves I missed, what drew someone else to you.” Bella didn’t even know who he’d slept with, she assumed not Beth, because it would be far too complicated, but he said he had, just as she did. “I know you don’t want to know, but I would enjoy knowing.”

“A list,” he looked at her and slowly realized that he’d misinterpreted her meaning. A common occurrence for him as he was generally practical and took most things and what she said at face value. He was never that adept at finding the hidden meaning behind someone’s words. He was getting better at times but there were moments, like now, where he thought he’d known what she wanted and turned out it was different. 

Her next request was even more difficult. Not because he couldn’t make it out but because he understood her too clearly and it was just a topic that he wasn’t all that interested in sharing. “You really want to know?” He felt like if he knew the same of her it would only instill more jealousy in him. Perhaps that was what she wanted. Maybe she enjoyed feeling jealous at times. Or maybe it was as simple as just wanting to know what her partner had been up to while they were apart. 

           The sad part was Bella often did think of herself that way, even if she didn’t want to. Perhaps less so now, if they were moving in together, if things worked out and she was able to turn him, but she did. It wasn’t Miles fault, it wasn’t Beth’s fault either, it was just when she’d met him. Miles needed that time, and it had hurt, ached inside her that maybe, just maybe, he’d meet someone who was far more fitting to him. Not better, just…more him. When he’d moved into his apartment, and there was evidently no sign of anything for her, she’d felt it again, every decision he made that left her out. She was probably making him feel the same way, like she was pushing him out when each of them had just been trying to protect themselves.

           Bella snorted a laugh when he repeated that she mattered most, above all things, because she didn’t believe it. His girls were first, that wouldn’t changed until they’d died, and even then maybe not. “Just sometimes, just occasionally,” she insisted, because it was easier to ask it to be sporadic than to believe it was always and then have that slip away. He wasn’t looking at her face fortunately, he was looking at her hands. Where he saw a crudeness she saw humanity, he’d never lose that on him. He had lived a life of experiences before his death, being a werewolf, being a vampire, couldn’t remove it.

         “I am always cute,” she agreed, feeling his hands at her neck and shoulders, worn flesh on her own. “I am sorry for becoming frustrated, I need to…communicate better.” Bella still felt his lips at her cheek, even though they had departed. It was difficult to consider how she might get better but perhaps curing her illness would help, Bella knew Iann and Miles both said their reasons for her to go after it for what they felt was her benefit, but Bella wanted to keep being who she was, she didn’t want to have to give up any of it. The only reason she considered it was because she knew becoming a vampire meant Miles would be giving up a part of himself too, the part that could grow with his family. How could she resist change when he wasn’t?

          “I want to know the things you’ve done, and keep doing, for me,” she requested, a few coming to mind, mostly the destruction of a wall in her home. Leaning up, pushing onto the toes of her heels and grazing the tip of her nose with his. “Not for competition, but to hear it,” Bella whispered softly. He hadn’t kissed Beth, something she knew was probably for himself mostly, but hoped in part was also for her. He’d broken up with her when he knew he was too consumed with work to be with her. He’d saved amongst what he did for his family to buy her the pearl necklace. The thoughts of all he had done washed over her mind and removed any intention of crying for upsetting reasons.

        “I want to know what you do because I consume you,” Bella requested more obviously, leaning her shin in until her lips were at his. There were lots of things she often imagined he’d do, yell at Beth on her behalf, threaten Ryden, decline beautiful women, but she knew it would not be so obviously, otherwise she’d know about it. “Didn’t buy that apartment?” she asked quietly, curious if she was the reason he hadn’t just bought something.

His daughters were first in a lot of things and would continue to be but Bellamy was the one constantly on his mind. He spent his whole day thinking of and being reminded of her so to him she did matter most. Perhaps she was second to his children and perhaps that would always be so but on a scale of everyone else she was definitely at the top. 

“You are,” he nodded in agreement with her comment about always being cute. An easy enough concession. Talking more about her and things he’d done for her though, a bit harder to get out. 

Miles liked to dote on her when he could, give her things and experiences and try to make her feel special and loved because that’s what she deserved. Not to mention he had a lot to make up for based on their last experiences together. He didn’t want her to feel that way again. That being said, Miles was more physical. He would happily take her anywhere she wanted to go -- so long as he had the hours to take time off -- and the time to do it. Talking about it though and talking about things he’d done and sacrificed for her was unnerving. 

         His words felt heavy with implication, that wanting what she did was selfish, or perhaps that was just guilt because it really and truly was selfish to want anyone to react a specific way. “Yes, sometimes,” she whispered. Wet eyes falling to the unfinished wood on the floor. “Sometimes I just want to matter more to you than everything else.” She spoken to Iann about that too, about how she wanted Miles to be jealous sometimes, for him to be consumed with infatuation for her, to not need to plan everything, to just be so filled with her that logic went out the window. 

          Bella remained where she was, this massive distance between them, looking at him through the open balcony doors, they weren’t just far apart, they were in separate rooms really. “I can’t tell you your odds, and I’m not saying you don’t deserve that information, I’m saying I don’t have it but you’re acting like I do and that we can just decide things that we can’t.” Bella’s hands crossed over her chest in the short soft pink dress she wore. 

         Her plump lips pushed together, this wasn’t meant to go this way, they weren’t meant to be fighting with one another. How could he even scold her for making decisions on her own, she had to. Waiting for Miles had never favoured her. She waited on Drew and she waited on the house and in the end she’d gone after Drew with Iann, and the house had been for his daughters and not her. Bella did not want this fight, she didn’t want to make him feel badly, she just didn’t know how to answer either. “I don’t know how you can even say that to me. I was patient through every decision you made for you Miles. Working, the house, Beth, hell I waited months for you, knowing you were sleeping with other people. So yeah, maybe I decided I needed to make some of my own decisions because I needed to have a life.”

         Bella ran her hands up her arms as they were crossed on her chest. It was even harder to yell at him when he spoke about his perception of himself. It wasn’t hard for her to imagine how he might feel, she felt like a monster in her own way frequently. “Miles, I love so much of the human things about you, I don’t want you to lose them, or feel like a monster, because you are so many things. I just want to also see more than the human stuff, I want you to tell me that stuff. That you tried magic stuff, that you shifted, that you drank something strange or swam with something terrifying. Monster doesn’t mean supernatural, you know monsters aren’t just that.” A monster had been his drinking and he’d conquered that after all.

        Bella pushed off the wall. “I shouldn’t expect you to respond a specific way, and I have every intention of telling you things when I know them, but I, unfortunately, sometimes I just need someone to support me and I want that to be you. I supported you for months, Miles, even when it felt like I might literally never be anyone but the girl who got you to sleep with someone after Beth. We said we’d be honest. If you want us to make decisions together I need to feel like you’re not just trying to do what’s right for everyone else, or what’s logical, I need to feel like, at least sometimes, I am first for you.”

        Sucking in her cheeks Bella tried to reign in the tears in her eyes, none having fallen yet, finally reaching him outside again, taking his hands in hers, interlacing her fingers with his. “We need to put each other first if we’re going to do this. I love you, Miles. You told me to be selfish, I selfishly just need you to please try. Sometimes. I know you’re not all logic and practical decisions and thinking with your head. Remember, when I got back from Ohio?” she squeezed his hands. “You practically engulfed me, you reacted to my feelings and we made a decision, we just…need to start following through.”

He bit his lower lip and sucked in a heavy breath as she spoke and the tension rose between in the very visible distance that was between them. He didn’t suppose either of them had intended the evening to go this way. He hated having a disagreement with her. He didn’t consider it a fight because he wasn’t mad with her and he could never really be mad or frustrated with her for long anyway. 

“You are first for me,” he whispered to her when she came closer to him and laced her slender fingers between his own. “I could list the things I’ve done and continue to do for you but I won’t because this isn’t some competition about whose sacrificed more or done more waiting or any of that.” It was a bit of a blow when she brought up Beth and he tried not to be affected by it. He didn’t want her to think of herself that way and he didn’t think she really did but she said it nonetheless and that stung. 

“You matter most... above all other things.” He looked down at their hands, her small fingers and smooth skin, pale and perfect compared to his own which appeared crude in comparison. Not fit to hold onto her. He thought about all the other things he could say. Retorts. Explanations. But he looked back to her face and those words fell dry from his mouth and he swallowed them roughly back down his throat. 

         “No, it’s not so bad to be human, but you -,” Bella cut herself off, deciding she needed to think about her words before she actually said any of them. “Sometimes it feels like human is all you want to be and that’s the one thing you just can’t be anymore.” She ran her fingers up over his shirt, trying to show that, no matter how frustrated she was becoming she at least appreciated they were talking about things and would not become mad over them.

          Bella’s fingers found his neck, dipping into the fabric of his shirt and softly running her nails over what parts of his back they could reach. “You never told me any of that,” she said. Honestly she was amazed his vision didn’t just come back when he was turned into a werewolf, that it hadn’t healed him, but Bella also didn’t know how he’d gone blind exactly, generally she knew, but not specifically. “Maybe you know you’re not human anymore,” she offered. “But I think something in you makes you feel like you need to be human with me, do I make you feel like that?” Bella asked, unsure if her desires when they’d first started dating had indicated that she just wants him to give her something normal. She did, but not completely.

         Her nails stopped moving and the tightness in her shoulders evidenced that she was reacting badly, as Miles was not quite as exposed to as others were. “It’s not that simple, Miles,” Bellamy answered. “I don’t even see why we have to talk about this, it isn’t even a guarantee it’s something that’s possible right now, I was just explaining why I told Iann and I don’t need your permission to not do something.” Her lips pursed more firmly, she didn’t want him to offer solutions, or answers, why couldn’t he just understand her feelings and hold her? He was being such a male.

          Bella’s hands pulled away, as did she. It was a strange sort of upset, not quite mad at him, just mad at being misunderstood and not knowing how to get what she wanted from someone. Her biggest flaw, needing something from people and not allowing them to have their own reactions. People always drew the short straw with her and that but Bella couldn’t stop it as she walked into the empty room that was meant to be theirs soon enough. “You’re asking me questions I don’t have any answers to, I said I was having a doctor do tests, so can you just stop for two seconds? Why is it impossible for someone to just say, ‘it’s okay you feel that way, I know you’ll be okay’ and leave it at that? I’ve told you what I’m feeling, and if your response is to try and solve that for me then you don’t just want to what I’m thinking and feeling, Miles, you want to decide it away, say what’s what and have that be that.”

           Leaning against the door that lead into the room she let out a sigh, at herself. “I know you’re trying to help. But honestly it just hurts more, I need you to not do that. I need my feelings to matter more than everything else sometimes, and for you to just…love me and do nothing else.” Bella’s eyes were wet as she looked at him, golden gaze shining more than usual. 

He let out a breath at her words. Being human was something he just couldn’t be anymore. He hadn’t been human for so very long. “I know that, Bellamy,” he returned with a quiet stillness to his voice. “I don’t need a reminder.” 

“No, I don’t do this because of you. It’s just how I am. I know I’m not human and I never will be again and when I become a vampire I’ll be even further from it, and I don’t want to be human but I have to hold onto parts of it. I have to otherwise I’m just.. some monster.” He fell quiet, her soft touches at the back of his neck meaning to be a comfort but at the moment they weren’t. Normally he’d heard he was a monster from the hushed whispers of his parents when they were in the other room and didn’t think he could hear. Of course it came from his father and his mother always shushed him but the word had come out and there it stuck. Beth had said it to him as well, only she had the decency to do so to his face. He’d been called a monster so many times that he had come to believe it and so he held onto the parts of him that made him human, especially around them because the last thing he wanted was for them to fear him again. 

Bella stepped away, her hands falling away from him and her voice was firm as she spoke. He could hear the frustration in her and see the sadness in her eyes but he just couldn’t roll over. “No, you don’t need my permission to do anything.”

He leaned against the railing as she had done before. “I do love you but I’m not just going to sit idly by and tell you everything that you want to hear. It’s not just about you it’s about me too. I’m asking you these questions because it’s my life it’s going to affect. Like you said before, I might die, for good. I just want to know my odds. Am I not entitled to that information? I’m not deciding anything for you, you’ve made it plenty clear that you’re capable of doing all that on your own.”

       “It should be you,” Bellamy said, gently poking him before he wrapped his arm around her. She nearly melted into him, marshmallow on graham cracker over a fire. Whenever he held her Bella felt better, not quite so good she wanted to be selfish but that was only because her being selfish would be keeping everything like this for herself. She wouldn’t take the cure and she could keep being happy as she was in his arms, he’d just be like her. 

        “It’s…it’s not just that,” and Bella felt at a loss for words as to what it was, as she had with Iann. To them it was logical to want to get rid of it. This was something bad that existed inside her, but to Bella it wasn’t bad. It was something that made her who she was. Something that shaped her person, the person she liked. Beyond just making her powerful in the way it did, Bella had really come to love herself. “I just…I didn’t want to have to learn how to like myself all over again,” Bella stated against his chest, keeping her head low. Admitting it was selfish enough, that she didn’t want to do it and currently she didn’t even know if it was possible.

       Lifting her head she shook it as she looked at him. “It should be, because it would be to you,” she emphasized, not quite able to take it from Miles as she had Iann. She didn’t intend to live with Iann, he wasn’t her partner the way Miles was. “We’re not the same, I don’t see my illness as something bad, and I didn’t think you saw it that way either,” Bellamy’s lips grew tight as they did when she was thinking hard or when she was frustrated with a situation.

       “You can’t compare the two, and did you even try to fix your eyes Miles?” her tone was softer, as she looked at him, because really she wasn’t angry, she was frustrated that he was being just like Iann, logic over heart. “You’ve never told me you did, and maybe I’m wrong, but from how you were when we met it seemed like you went from living with Beth to just coping here. We could speak to some witches, some faeries, some doctors, maybe you can fix your eyes. It’s time to be a little less human.”

A little less human. It seemed at times that he couldn’t seem to escape being human, at least in her eyes. He wondered if he’d still be so very human when he became a vampire or if something in him would click and suddenly he’d be the supernatural entity he was supposed to be. “I don’t think it’s so bad to be human,” he said to her. “Especially if I’m going to become a vampire. I might need to hold onto that.” She did say before that normal human things would be a comfort after being turned, like having a bathroom even though he wouldn’t need one. 

“I did see a few witches. Tried a couple of potions. Chewed on tablets made from kelp and flowers. Took some injections. Didn’t work. Maybe it was the werewolf in me, fighting off the magic that tried to fix it, or maybe because it was just how I was when I was human that it’s too late for it to be fixed. Can’t regrow an arm if it was cut off. Can’t regrow nerves that were destroyed.” Almost as soon as he’d arrived in Soapberry he’d made inquiries and attempts to restore his vision to how it had been. He’d spent months trying different remedies and none of them had worked. The last witch he’d gone to wanted to cut out his eyes and give him new ones to see if the nerves would reconnect then, but the alternative was having no sight at all and he wasn’t going to risk making things worse if there wasn’t a guarantee it would be better.

         Bella nodded her head slowly. “Drew made something for himself that would make him resistant to my abilities, I’ve been attempting to replicate it to give to people but Iann suggested it might also work to remove it from me.” There was a lot of doubt in Bella about that but if it would make things less dangerous for Miles she could at least go down that route, see what options there were for her. Currently it was just testing, examining who she was and how she was existing.

        Miles pulled away though and Bella fell back, leaning the back of her hips against the railing that surrounded the balcony, watching him as he began to pace. It took a moment of silence but eventually he spoke, words that kind of surprised Bella but also didn’t. Miles had been thinking about being turned but hadn’t looked into it. It was pretty well known a werewolf becoming a vampire was dangerous, their metabolism and the magic that affected it fought off infection and really that’s what vampirism was, an infection that killed you and animated that death. Werewolves healed, their bodies fought death, rather than existed within it.

       “I don’t need to, but if I can I probably should,” she answered as he returned, hands running down her slender and cool arms. “I’ve always had this illness in me, before being a vampire, it affects my mood, how I react to things, even when I take my medicine a part of it is always there, it merely stops it from growing, like my body was able to do naturally when I was alive. But it was there, and I don’t…I don’t want to suddenly be something different when I’m happy. I like myself right now, and even if I like myself then, I just - what if other people don’t?” Bella asked, Iann had pointed out she was being too emotional, that practically she would probably still be the same and likely she would be, but Bella lingered in ‘what ifs.’

       Bella looked up with a soft smile of assurance, partially for herself. “It’s really nothing I can say is any particular way until the doctor has finished her tests, so I just want to focus on you.”

“And I want to focus on you,” he squeezed her shoulders gently, “We’re both being so very selfless right now. Someone’s got to start acting selfishly or we’ll never get anywhere.” He laughed a little and wrapped his arms around her petite frame. He could feel the warmth from his body go to hers, the small space of time where they’d been apart had caused her skin to grow a bit cold on the outside but it was beginning to warm slowly again. It was something he’d grown so used to and barely noticed it but now he was aware because one day they might be the same temperature. 

He really didn’t think the change would kill him. He was confident that he would be fine. Perhaps he was only hoping for it so strongly that it affected his belief that everything would turn out for the best. As for Bellamy and her illness and the affect it had on her personality, her mood and emotions, and the way others viewed her, he believed that too would all turn out for the best. “If other people don’t,” he went along with her hypothetical, “then screw them. If the people who like you now suddenly stop liking your or wanting to be around you because you’ve changed, then they don’t deserve to be around you anymore. Fuck ‘em. I’ll lock ‘em up in the cells for a night or two if it’ll make you feel better.”

Maya gave him a slightly incredulous look, “That can’t be the first time you’ve heard that.” She let out a snort of her own when Miles informed her that whatever they were follow kind of smelled like mold. “Or he lives in his mom’s basement,” 

At first, Maya observed the scene, taking in all the useful details. She would’ve found it more comical if it wasn’t her shadow the man was chasing. Now she could smell something like copper and feel the hum of magic in the air. Among the relevant details, she noted that Miles went immediately into high alert mode. In a cop voice, he called for the shadow stealer to put the box down and raise his hands above his head. 

He didn’t. Instead, he started muttering to himself. She could feel the magic getting thicker in the air. He was going to cast something. Seeing as Miles had just demanded he put his box down, it was probably going to be bad news for the werewolf. 

“Hey asshole,” Maya called, “You think my shadow’s a bitch to deal with? Try the real thing.” She could handle a little magic. Besides, with any luck, this dude would realize that two against one weren’t good odds for a fight. 

“Shit,” Miles swore under his breath when he heard the low mutterings coming from the man before them. Fucking magic. Before he had a chance to call out to Maya to stay back, the magic coiled in the air between them and burst, knocking him backwards and causing him to loose his footing and land hard on his back. The fall forced the air out from his lungs and he gasped hard to regain the oxygen he’d suddenly lost. Stars danced in the corners of his eyes and when he pushed himself back up the man was gone, running off down the road with Maya’s shadow in tow, scrambling around on the ground beside his own shadow. 

“You okay?” Miles went to Maya’s side, quickly checking to make sure she hadn’t been badly hurt. “Come on,” he ushered her up and started running after the witch. Miles was faster than Maya, werewolf genes and all, and faster than the witch, so it wasn’t long before he caught up to the witch.

It was curious but Maya’s shadow seemed to be clinging to the witch’s shadow. She clung onto it’s shoulders and pulled at it’s hair and the witch howled in pain and stumbled. Maya’s shadow was fighting the witch’s shadow and it was somehow affecting the real witch. 

        “I mean, he should be a fancy lawyer soon, I wonder if he’d be interested in specialising in something supernatural,” Bellamy thought aloud, then his mediocre nature might be less of a deterrent. Honestly that would have been very helpful for her, especially since if she could recall he was in some kind of white collar sort of law like business or marketing. Whatever the case Miles knew that at least Bella found his brother to be a plain sort in comparison to him. Preference was everything.

        Bella nodded her head. She had informed him that during their time apart she had gone after the man who had kidnapped her and Iann, that there had been complications, but they hadn’t had much time to get int specifics. “We found something that we think could potentially remove my illness, and I didn’t really want to so I was sort of not thinking about it until you asked me to turn you. I wanted to make sure that my illness didn’t make it impossible or challenging and I knew Iann would make me be practical and listen to the doctor so I told him why I’d changed my mind.” It was obvious Iann and Miles weren’t fans of one another but it didn’t seem like they hated each other either.

        Lifting her gaze she continued, still not totally comfortable with all word choices. “I don’t want to get rid of my illness in case it changes me too much, but I’d rather change a little than endanger you, especially if you are making big changes too, I wouldn’t ever want to be that selfish with you.” It was one thing after all to say she wanted a life with him and a whole other to say she’d just keep being sick even if it meant risking his life.

         Slowly drawing her bottom lip into her teeth Bella bit down before slowly releasing it, some of her gloss lost. “I’m not entirely sure, from what the doctor said it differs from vampire to vampire and is mostly instinctual,” she answered, fingers deepening their pressure on his back, afraid he’d pull away at her lack of knowledge and whatever fear might overcome him because of it. “She took some samples though, said she could probably get an idea off them on what kind of way would work best for the kind of vampiric lineage I have. The only other option would be to see if maybe it’s in one of my sire’s journals. Most of what he wrote was about turning sick vampires like me but he was old, maybe he turned someone before he got into that.”

Bella’s illness was such an integral part of her being that the smell of it, or rather the smell of the flower that worked as her medicine, just seemed to emanate from her regardless if she’d been using it or not; it filled her apartment, covered her clothes and hair and even covered his bed. “A cure?” He was shocked because as with most magical illnesses it didn’t seem like something that could have a cure. He thought it was just going to be there forever, just like a vampire would be a vampire forever, and if he hadn’t thought of the idea of not being a werewolf then he would have been a werewolf forever. So many things about the supernatural world just gave off the impression of being permanent. 

He did pull away from her at that moment though, not because he was scared at her lack of knowledge but because he was frustrated and it was confusing and he needed to think. 

He didn’t think that her illness would have an affect on his plan of becoming a vampire. Didn’t think that his own permanent death would be a possibility. Though considering that a vampire was technically dead, he supposed that part made sense. He would have to “die” in order to become a vampire. His heart would stop, his blood would grow cold, he would no longer need to breath. “Okay, let me see if I understand you,” he paced a little bit, rubbing his hand over his lightly stubbled jaw -- he’d shaved yesterday morning and already he had a coating of stubble. 

Ruby snapped at him as he ran past, following into the water with a playful, growling bark. She gave a great shake of her body, flinging water everywhere before being splashed again. She sneezed twice as she got a face full from his antics.

The creek was cool and shallow, the water running smoothly but not too swiftly. So once her sneezing was done, Ruby lunged at him again, front paws around his neck as she tried to push him over again. They made quite a racket in the dim quiet of the woods, and would probably have been quite a sight as well, stirring the clear water to a silty brown as they wrestled.

Miles growled at being knocked over by her lunge, the sound gurgling as the water entered his mouth. Not caring about the taste of silt he swallowed it and lunged at her in turn. Their playful yips and growls mingled with the splash of water and the occasional chirp of a bird in a tree who watched them with a quizzical eye from it’s perch. 

There was an element of freedom and carelessness that he didn’t think would have been possible if they’d been in human forms. Frolicking in a creek seemed childish to his human brain but seemed like great fun in this moment. It was interesting how  much of his human brain seemed to be put aside. He was aware that it was there but it remained quiet and didn’t intrude into his thoughts forcing him to behave in a particular way. If it had been present then he likely wouldn’t have continued to play and lunge at Ruby, snapping his jaws and splashing at her in the water. It was as if his human mind was sleeping and his wolf had full reign. Normally when his wolf had full control of things he ended up waking up covered in mud and blood with the taste of venison coating his tongue. His mind was more pleasantly occupied at the moment though. 

Miles was no expert on interior design. Even at his old house with Beth, she had done everything. He’d just been there to carry and move all the heavy furniture and build the shelves and drawers. They’d argued over whether he should read the instructions or not but eventually things came together. He wasn’t sure how much input he’d be able to give her though, but he listened as she rambled on about her ideas for the place and comments about their future.

“Maybe a small dining table instead,” he suggested with a little grimace. “I don’t know if you’d want to host my family. Or scratch that. I don’t know if I’d want to host my family. We could have two Thanksgiving dinners. One very awkward and horribly uncomfortable one at my parent’s and another one here with our friends and my kids, maybe my brother if he’s well behaved. Did I mention that he wants me to introduce him to a fairy? I’m actually surprised he’s interested in delving into the mystical realm of supernatural dating. I guess last time he was here he ran into a fairy, got enchanted, and has been bugging me about hunting her down.” He’d had no luck so far as all he had to go on was: she’s tall and lean with large green eyes and hair as red as the sunset. All very good features but useless on Miles as he had no sense of color whatsoever.

“I like the sound of hardwood floors, the velvet couch sounds good, a wall of pictures would be ideal, and so long as the bed is made of metal so I can twist it back into shape afterwards.” He was only partly joking about the bed being metal. Bellamy would likely just buy a new bed if he or they ended up breaking one. He didn’t think he’d need to be tied up for anything other than her own enjoyment.

        “A small table then,” Bella smiled, it wasn’t like she had a massive family to speak of. Even if she didn’t count Iann since biologically they weren’t family that just left her Mother and her Mother spent the holidays with her girlfriend for the most part, sometimes she could sneak away to Bella but to everyone who knew of Bellamy, from her old life, she was dead. It would be too big of a shock now. Her Dad knew but…well Huck seemed to love Bellamy a lot more when she was little than he did her growing up, maybe even then it had just been for show.

       Bella laughed at the idea of Miles brother with a faerie. “He thinks he’s good looking enough for a faerie?” she teased, hands that had wrapped around him running over the fabric of his shirt against his back, feeling the gentle curves of his muscles and the soft layer of softer flesh surrounding them. “Faerie are very enchanting,” Bella commented. “You’ll find them very hard to resist when you’re turned. Even ignoring personal preferences faerie blood is intoxicating.”

       As he agreed to other things she had suggested, added his own comment that made her blush the way he was used to, no colour but he upturned sides of her mouth saying it all. “You planning on doing some damage to it?” she asked him with a raised brow, chin lifting to look up at him. In heels the distance was not quite so vast as when she was on flat feet but it was still there. “You know you’re strong enough now that you could. You’ll probably be equally as strong.”

Between him and his brother, Miles did usually consider his brother to be the more attractive of the two. He was taller, slimmer, generally more athletic in the general sense of the word, more intellectual, and more successful in his work.

The carefree smile on his face faltered at her words. “You spoke to Iann?” He felt her grip tighten on him ever so slightly and her voice got quieter until she stopped completely, unable to get the last words out though they hung silent in the air around them. What then? Even the wind seemed to ask it as it ghosted slowly over the balcony breathing life into the open doors of the house behind them. What then?

         The walls between the two places had been assessed by an actual contractor and Bella had worked with him, and a few others, while Miles was working shifts for the sheriff’s department, to knock down what could be removed and how to style what needed to remain to keep the supporting sections capable of holding the place up. Once worked out though it was a simple task and the place suddenly was not nearly as narrow as it had initially been. 

          It was finally one of his days off where he didn’t have Jane and Ellie though and they forwent their usual date night in favour of spending the day working on the place. Currently this meant actually deciding the layout of the place and what kind of style would best suit them since there was no use in her purchasing a bunch of tiles for their bedroom floor if Miles wanted carpet, no use in installing the bathtub if Miles would have preferred a shower.

          Bella turned to look at him as she sat on the fence of the balcony on the second level, the three doors to what would be their room open and letting in all the light of summer, her shadow cast over the floor. “I was kind of going very bohemian with the place, obviously,” she said, the bathtub still in front of the center door. “But I want to know what you think will make you feel the most comfortable and we can maybe find a place to meet.” Him being comfortable was going to be pretty important if - no, when, he turned. 

         “I thought maybe minimalist french design. A simple velvet navy lounge, some white walls, soft tan hard wood floors, cover a whole wall with pictures of all of us, maybe the one beneath the staircase.” Bella was merely talking, watching his expression to see if anything sounded good to him. “A long reclaimed wood dining table so we can host Thanksgiving with your whole family, I’ll drag Iann as my family’s representative.”

        Pushing off the railing she wrapped her arms around Mile’s middle, kissing his arm, the flow of her dress evident as the summer breeze billowed it around her thighs. “A subtly gold bed I can tie you to when you’re far too hungry, insatiable.”

“Maybe a small dining table instead,” he suggested with a little grimace. “I don’t know if you’d want to host my family. Or scratch that. I don’t know if I’d want to host my family. We could have two Thanksgiving dinners. One very awkward and horribly uncomfortable one at my parent’s and another one here with our friends and my kids, maybe my brother if he’s well behaved. Did I mention that he wants me to introduce him to a fairy? I’m actually surprised he’s interested in delving into the mystical realm of supernatural dating. I guess last time he was here he ran into a fairy, got enchanted, and has been bugging me about hunting her down.” He’d had no luck so far as all he had to go on was: she’s tall and lean with large green eyes and hair as red as the sunset. All very good features but useless on Miles as he had no sense of color whatsoever.

While Maya had taken the time to chat at the barista behind the counter, he’d taken it upon himself to look around the interior of the cafe. He wasn’t sure what he was looking for but he just kept his eyes peeled for anything out of the ordinary, something that didn’t looked like it belonged in a cafe usually frequented by hipsters. He didn’t notice anything visually but he did note a smell that seemed a bit off. There was something in the air beyond the usual strong and normally overpowering scent of coffee beans. It was something that only a werwolf or vampire would likely be able to pick up as even he had almost missed it. 

It could be that someone had just been wearing extremely strong aftershave or perfume and it was lingering in the air in a odd way but there was something about the scent he didn’t like. It made the hairs stand up on the back of his neck.

“Hm?” He turned his attention back to Maya, “Yeah. Sketchy guy in a corner. Sounds about right.” He didn’t mention the smell just yet because he wasn’t sure what the scent was. It could be nothing or it could be a clue. “If he just left I can probably track him. You said he was sat in the corner here?” Miles went toward the corner and sure enough, the strange scent he caught was stronger here. He tried to place the smell, it was almost musty like an attic or basement that hadn’t been opened in years and had a spice to it that tingled the back of his throat. “Alright,” Miles nodded toward her, “I think I have his scent or something like it.” He went back outside and sniffed the air, “He went this way,” Miles crossed the street and started walking down  the road. 

If Maya had been alone, she would’ve had no way of tracking the man. At least not reliably. Luckily though she wasn’t alone. “Right, werewolf,” she replied as he explained that he could track the man’s scent. 

She gestured out towards the door, “Lead the way Scooby Doo.” She followed him out onto the street. As they walked she tried to catch whatever scent he was, but with no luck. Given her distinct lack of werewolf smelling ability though, it wasn’t surprising. 

“What does he smell like?” Maya asked as they walked. It might give them a clue as to what kind of person they would encounter. She’d take whatever information she might be able to get. She reminded herself too that in addition to being a werewolf, Miles was a cop. Which meant that her usual ways of handling problems were probably out of the question. 

Luckily though, Maya seemed to recognize a sound coming from around the corner.

It was a sight from a movie. A man who appeared thin but had an odd sort of bulge on his right shoulder was attempting to coerce what he could only assume to be Maya’s shadow into a wooden box. The box reeked of damp and earth and copper and minerals and it had to be dirt soaked in blood. Maya had the ability to laugh about the situation but Miles could smell the blood in the dirt and so no laughter emitted from him. He was on high alert.