I am creation both haunted and holy

friends with benefits a scene from one of our D&D games hehehe

Nigel Farage is the leader of Reform UK, a far right party who are currently in the process of a serious bid to become the UK government. they are just straight up evil.

Count Binface is an intergalactic space warrior with a bin on his head. he likes to run as a novelty candidate in general and mayoral elections. a big thing he likes to do is run as a candidate against the incumbent prime minister:

(Also pictured: Boris Johnson, Elmo)

Anyway, in brief:

Nigel Farage is currently in the midst of a big scandal about his finances

He has decided to deal with this by 1) making a show of nobly resigning from parliament and then 2) immediately running in the resulting by-election

He has stated that he is letting 'the people' judge his actions and implied that if he wins that will prove that he has been exonerated in the court of public opinion

His goal was presumably to get a big resounding win over the other parties, proving that The People still love him.

the other parties have thus far decided that this is a 'vanity election' and, well, there is one very easy way to ensure that he will not beat any of them, and that is simply not to play.

and as a result the only person who has so far confirmed they are running against him is Count Binface. no matter the outcome this makes Nigel Farage look like, u know, a fucking clown.

London Bridge to be renamed ‘Phoebe Waller’.

Ceefax to be brought back immediately.

Investment in 20,001 more police officers.

Nationalisation of the model railways (and Adele).

Ross Kemp to be the next poet laureate.

Massive expansion in recycling in all sectors except Hollywood movie plots.

£1 trillion a week for the NHS.

Sir David Attenborough to be on the fourth plinth at Trafalgar Square (or a statue of him, I don’t mind which).

Any Czechs on the Irish border are to be allowed to stay there.

Philip Green’s estates to be used as land for social housing.

Piers Morgan to be zero emissions by 2030.

Legalisation of the hunting of fox-hunters.

Regeneration of the “Intu” Shopping Centre, Uxbridge.

Speakerphones to be banned on public transport.

Donald Trump’s life to be the source material for a new pantomime at the London Palladium, starring Julian Clary as Trump and Gary Wilmot as Barack Obama.

Shops that play Christmas music before December are to be closed down and turned into public libraries.

Abolition of the Lords (all of them this time).

Universal Credit to be repealed and, more importantly, renamed. (Nowhere else in the universe would enact a policy devised by Iain Duncan Smith)

BBC commentator on all state occasions to be Craig Charles.

Katie Hopkins to be banished to the Phantom Zone.

The hand dryer in the gents’ toilet at the Crown & Treaty, Uxbridge to be moved to a more sensible position.

 The BBC to bring back Grandstand, no matter what sports it can afford the rights to.

Jacob Rees-Mogg to be prorogued.

New voting age limit of 16 to be introduced. New voting age limit of 80 to be introduced too.

Nuclear weapons: a firm public commitment to build the £100bn renewal of the Trident weapons system, followed by an equally firm private commitment not to build it. They’re secret submarines, no one will ever know. It’s a win win.

University tuition fees to be charged to any politician who has ever voted for university tuition fees, plus interest.

Stop selling arms to repressive regime. Start buying lasers from Count Binface.

Novelty candidates in British elections must not be controlled or exploited in any way by film producers in the United States.

On Brexit: there must be another referendum, about whether there should be another referendum.

Oh and I’ll throw in free broadband.

You can find it on the wayback machine.

Here's the one for Makersfield:

Hello!

I'm opening commissions! This is the basic rundown of prices and such. Please refer to this link with all the additional info: tinyspaceofficercomms.carrd.co

Those orphaned by their gods have found solace in each other.

But I’m still stuck on that opening phrase because…what? I am so confused by how people view interactions on tumblr & AO3 these days. Let me make it very clear for anyone who is unsure:

CREATORS WANT YOU TO INTERACT WITH THEIR WORK.

The limit does not exist on how many of their works you can interact with in a certain period.

If you like every fic they’ve ever written? Then feel free to give them all kudos and even leave a comment on every single one if you feel inclined! If you’re going through someone’s blog and you vibe with every post, like/reblog to your heart’s content!

As long as you’re not expecting something back from them or adding a ton of irrelevant comments, it’s not spam! It’s what this is all about!! I’m not even much of a creator and I still feel a huge sense of pride when I see a ton of notifications in a row from a person, as it clearly shows they thought my blog was worth spending time on.