Thorn in the eyes

good! it would be horrible if i had to question it, so we can't let it happen. i will! i promise that i am going to reach out with the most random stories. maybe even get some stories about the insanity on set. oh! tour! how is it going? is it as epic as it seems like it would be? please send them back! we love the chaos! you are proud? you are being very sweet!

you won't have to ever, promise. i will enjoy all of it. i'll listen to any story you wanna tell me and i can in turn tell you what chaos has been happening on tour. it's been going well. been a lot of fun with all of being a mess on stage together. plus seeing the fans makes me feel content. it is. seeing so many people and doing things we've never done before, it feels more epic than other tours we did in the past. i will send plenty. you might hear at least two of the other members since they like to glue themselves to me. i am, very proud here. i can't help it. i like seeing you getting all this love.

i will always adore you, hyung. i just think it's important to point out that i wouldn't mind disappearing three states away, and if i do return by christmas day, you'd better have the presents ready. that is good to hear, though, that you don't let it affect you. but you've always been a tough cookie. and i'm honestly surprised that kook allows anyone near them, but i think i managed to convince him that i wouldn't take taehyungie to a strip club, even though the idea was definitely there. stuck? what do you mean?

i know. i just exist and seem to make you laugh or smile in some way. i mean, you'd have plenty of presents ready. don't even worry about it. well cause we made up. i'm not staring daggers at anyone anymore so i'm good here. i am. pfft, what would tae even do at a strip club? he's too infatuated with kook to let his gaze steer anywhere else. PRIVATE: well... i have a crush on hyung. i realized i had feelings last month and had to get out of the being in denial phase. it sucks... that's why i feel stuck. i'm gonna tell you this, hobi. don't put your eggs all in one basket when it comes to seeing anyone. not saying this is relative to my situation but there may be others out there that wanna date you.

you can't see me right now, but i'm sending you a criminally offensive side eye. and if you ever were to lose me three states away, at least make it somewhere with a chipotle. you say "then" like it was months ago, but hey, let's take the wins. so i've heard. is there anything i can do, hyung?

haha, i can believe it. you adore me though. i'm sure it will be. can't have you lost anywhere else. cause in my frame of mine now, it seems that way okay. i'm focused on other things. i am taking the wins. honestly, i don't know. tae and kook have been making sure to keep an eye on me. those two have been glued to me when they aren't taking time to be together. i just hate feeling the way i do right now. i feel stuck.

so what's this i hear about you singing that you lost me three states away, and that i might return on christmas day? here's the thing, hyung: i've been casually avoiding your drama because the stress of y'all fighting is making my skin break out. out of sight, out of mind. also, how are you doing? ( @mnyoongis )

i mean it seemed like it there plus it was funny to say as well. hey, it's been not as bad. it's been better. may not be 100% but at least we aren't at each other's throats like then. well... i'm a mess of emotions right now but i'm dealing as best as i can.

i hope that's true! i figured that you didn't, because otherwise i'd be questioning our friendship. as long as you try, that's all that counts. i'm staying put in the same place for a good while. obviously! your life is just so incomplete without me. voice notes will be happening! and i apologize if you hear the guys in the background. thank you! it is kind of everywhere!

i promise it is. which i can't have you doing that. you can always reach out. i'll be happy hearing from you no matter what. i can do my best at at least. well, if i wasn't busy with tour, i'd easily come visit you. hmm, you aren't wrong there. definitely wouldn't be the same. send me plenty and i'll do my best to send voice notes back. i won't mind at all. you might hear chaos on my end depending on when i send them to you. you're welcome. it is but it's great. very proud of you here.

In my mission to befriend members of BTS, I feel as though becoming your friend is going to become my magnum opus, purely because you seem like the one that keeps his guards up the most. Am I hitting the right mark? I swear, I'm a pretty chill guy. There will be no high maintenance demands coming from my end. @mnyoongis

oh? i mean i'm all for this mission. your magnum opus huh? you are making it seem like i'm the end boss you have to get past. you aren't wrong there. i don't let people in as easily at all. i trust you on that though seeing your friends with jungkook, you won't have to do too much to win my friendship. i dote on him a ton so anyone close to him is fine by me.

you might be? don't you dare toy with me! i mean sleep is needed, so i guess i won't be too heartbroken. it's fine? just fine? you aren't going to be just so sad that you don't get to see my smiling face? i guess there could be so voice notes though. thank you, i'm still shocked but i love how well everything is going!

haha, i won't toy with you. you know i don't mind hearing from you. i'll always try to respond no matter what timezone i'm in at the time. want me pouting about i don't get to see you? i don't even pout about my group members but maybe i can make you the exception. voice notes would work easily. you're welcome. it's deserved and i'm glad it's going so well. i've been seeing a lot about it online whenever i scroll through any social media.

PRIVATE: i don't know.. i just don't think there's anything wrong with how you're feeling. if there's one thing i've learned from my past with jungkook and taehyungie, it is that you don't have any control over it. of course i'm here for you regardless of what you're feeling. it's not something you can control, you know. that makes sense.. apparently it's a theme in this band, it seems. i'm happy that they're taking good care of you.

PRIVATE: i know there isn't but doesn't stop everything else hitting me as well. i know. feelings happen and i couldn't have stopped it even if i wanted to. i just think its the worst time due to everything going on right now. i know you are hyung. it means a lot to me. yeah, they happened and i'm glad i told you even if it's putting me through a crisis here. it seems to be. can't help where the crush lands. they always do. they know when i'm acting different easily.

PRIVATE: didn't we already agree that you should stop beating yourself up about this? i get that it's a big deal for you, but what you're feeling is normal and i'm here no matter what happens, okay? you told kookie? what did he say?

PRIVATE: i'm not really. just being pessimistic is all. i can't help that i decided to have a crisis about this. i know... i appreciate you being here for me. i did. he compared it to what he went through with tae before they got together. they've both been keeping an eye on me again it seems.

i know you aren't like waiting for me to call or text you, just staring at that phone with worry on your face. however, i am going to apologize anyway because i know i've been so busy! that will continue since right back to filming. but believe me...i'm still going to be a thorn in your side as much as i can! @mnyoongis

i mean i might be. though with how busy i am, i tend to wanna sleep as soon as i have a moment of peace. it's fine. i get it, i've seen you are getting all the love which i'm happy about. i'm sure you will and i expect it. you'll fit right in with the other thorns in my side that i'm around constantly lately.