Life Update
So, I guess I'd completely forgotten ever starting this page. I feel like posting a loooooong update on everything just as if this were my life journal.
It's been 5 months already since he was born on the 17th of January. I've re-read my old posts and laughed a little at all the anxiety I could feel while pregnant, but I can also still relate. If you have a baby, you know how the words "weekly weighing", "exclusively breastfeeding" and "percentile" can change your perception on everything that should feel normal. So, how did pregnancy and labour go down in the end?
My pregnancy was quite uneventful until the very end, expect for a constant feeling of dread and anxiety also related to other aspects of life during that time period. Around december, everything was solved and I could actually relax and enjoy the last few weeks without other thoughts ruining this magical time. Except, I was basically a whale at this point. Every movement, every breath, every food intake, all was difficult. I couldn't wait for it to be over. At around 37 weeks, I started following all the suggestions to anticipate labour because I was so done: walking, stairs, workout circuits, raspberry leaves tea, etc. My baby boy, being the stubborn capricorn he is, couldn't care less.
On the 13th of January, it was his dad's birthday. We celebrated and enjoyed the day together, then at night we told him "ok, now it's your moment to be born". I woke up the next day in a puddle of water and we rushed to the hospital, thinking he was gonna come out the same day - but, oh boy, was I wrong.
I was in labour for three full days.
On the 14th, they just kept me under observation, thinking the "real contractions" would start soon - I was already in a lot of pain at this point, with contractions every five minutes but not dilating.
On the 15th, they started with a "soft" method of induction - this did absolutely nothing for me.
On the 16th, they told me: "you're coming with us to L&D and you're coming back with your boy, it's a promise". They were right, I just didn't know it would take roughly 22 hours of oxytocin in order to get there. The pain was absolutely crazy and my plan to do it natural was thrown away. The morphine first and epidural next allowed me to finally nap after about 60 hours awake, my body relaxed and I finally reached that 10 cm dilation I so longed for in the morning of the 17th.
At lunch, after two long hours of pushing and almost rushing to a C-section (my ob was worried I was too tired to finish the job), my boy was finally born.
He was - and still is - so beautiful. He immediately cried and everyone in the room sighed of relief, me included. I was so under shock that I couldn't fathom he was actually here and just stared at him for two straight hours.
The first few days were kind of crazy and I was feeling really down. Hospital staff made me believe my milk just wasn't enough - spoiler, it was - and my baby had jaundice, so we stayed a few extra days. I just hate hospitals and I was still a little traumatized by this delivery, so I strongly believe this was the problem. As soon as we got home, milk started really coming in and he was growing lots. He's now in the 99th percentile, he's a giant for his age!
These last few months, I'm really enjoying getting to know him and helping him discover his new talents (smiling, babbling, rolling and so on). He's so cute when he gets frustrated, if it were up to him he'd already be walking now. It's like he doesn't realize he was just born few months ago.
So, to finish this endless post, let's just say I'm very happy. I'll soon be back to work and everything will change once again, but I'm ready for all the next chapter of the incredible story.
