Joey

It is, however, imperative he never realises he’s doing it. For example:

—

Robert and Roy? Tried solving a physics formula for the suit for a few hours. Days. Weeks, possibly.

Robert drank 5 days old coffee. Roy wrote his will just in case.

Flambae? Only stopped by to drop some food for his annoyingly cute boyfriend. Smack a few kisses on his cheeks. As a treat.

“Oh, that really fucking bothers me,” he gestures to the wall-long formula they’ve written on the whiteboard. “Hold on.”

He solves it.

While humming ‘hips don’t lie’.

“See! All you gotta do is manually decrease the propulsion heat when you reach peak altitude. Easy as shit. Or pie? Eh, shit sounds more badass.”

“…How did you do that.”

“Do what? I zoned out.”

—

“Hey, Bob-Bob, hand me the cutting board. I’m about to massacre these fucking onions. Bitches making MY boyfriend cry in my own damn house? I don’t think so.”

“…This is a laminated thermodynamics degree.”

“Oh. Yeah, I’ve had this thing since I finished college. But I can literally fly. Who gives a fuck about that.”

—

The nail in the coffin?

Vanderstenk.

Who, apparently, decided to give the whole supervillain thing a try. For Flambae specifically.

“YOU! I always knew our paths would meet again, Chadwick. Ever since your brilliant discovery in non-flammable fabric overshadowed me, I knew our rivalry would never end. My only equal. My only enemy.”

“Uh. No idea who the fuck you are, dude.”

“WE WERE COLLEGE. ROOMMATES. “

“Oh! Nope, don’t remember that. Can I get an autograph for my friend Vic, thought?”

I think Robert finding out Fun Chad Facts and being increasingly bothered that he doesn’t know them should be a running gag.

In Chad’s defense?

Robert just fits into his life so naturally that he sort of. Forgets Robert wouldn’t know these things.

Like:

Flambae? Has a full on conversation with Coop in French. Robert slowly taking off his head set and turning around to STARE.

“…You speak French?”

“Huh? Oh, yeah. And spanish. Oh, and korean! Anyway, wanna see this video Prism took of me fire surfing in the sky?”

-

Flambae asks if he can clock out early for a delivery.

“My new acrylic paints are coming today, Bob-Bob! Just watch. I’m gonna Bob Ross the fuck out of your place. Oh, AND mission done. Juggled some fireballs. Everyone clapped.”

Robert, rapidly scribbling yet another bullet point in his ‘things my boyfriend apparently loves and just never talks about’ list.

“Uh huh.”

-

Prism mentions how great his riff harmonies with the instrumental on her new song.

“Riff? You play guitar?”

“Oh, yeah, I play the bass when I’m bored. ANYWAY, I tried frying an egg on my arm and didn’t even burn it.”

Robert is this close.

-

Of course he has to bring it up later. Because he has no idea why it irks him so much, but it just does.

“I wanted to know you like painting me, and that you make costumes for your niece, and that you call me ‘my love’ in five different languages, and that you have TWO DEGREES.”

“But why! I don’t get it. I’m like, way cooler now than I was back then,” And for once? He is sheepish. “…And I guess I want you to think Flambae is cool, too. Or whatever.”

And Robert sighs. Because of course.

“Look. Objectively? Your powers? They’re impressive. But all of those things? That you did, that you loved, that you earned? They’re cooler. Chad is cooler. Okay?”

“…Fuck, alright, I’ll tell you about my nerdy ass college days, just shut up!”

Erid and the Hail Mary both have synthesized painkillers, Simon has probably never been on so much as Tylenol before, and someone missing an arm would get a dosage high enough to knock out an elephant

First Grace/Simon meeting:

Silly bloodymary meme. Plus rocky using some words of encouragement he learned from the Portable Earth thinking machine.

Two blue marbles in the night sky