Excelsior

Having chest pains wake you up at 2 am while living alone is not for the weak. Measured my pulse and tried to asses the situation, just to gaslight myself saying it's anxiety. I'm not a physically anxious person. At least till now, I have thought. Even thought of writing my will, but who will find me, anyway? I'd be rotting when they find me. Made myself tea and decided to sleep it off. It's still there when I woke up. Maybe it's just muscle pains? I didn't exercise lately? Gonna give it until tomorrow, if it's still there I'm heading to a hospital I don't work at, to avoid the embarrassment of having to ask colleagues to help with my anxiety or heart attack? Anyway. Turns out I'm not ready to die, haven't made life better for anyone yet. Just wanted to write it somewhere because the friends I have are celebrating away and o don't want to ruin their holidays. Unless I die...

Me, at 6:30 am: when did your child fall?

7 am, dead on my feet, girl with Asthma comes in, her dad says he's pressed for an important meeting so i help the nurse with her nebulisation and injection. Little did i know that the girl is the biggest Banshee I've ever witnessed. Because of an IM, girl caused my tachycardia to return and I had to lay down just because of those screams.

Patient's caretaker: this child had been left by his parents, i have to take care of him, you don't understand, we don't know if his father is alive or not.. i am very tired...i just had a 300km drive and then he's hit with something and they kept asking for different doctor visits and ....

ER, Kids need actual medical attention, it's 1 am, and this person comes in : my daughter sneezes. Give her meds and me a day off so i can go to *this* event.