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(WARNING: may include MAJOR spoilers for the future series)
The Vanity – Pen as a Character
It's best to begin with who Pen is as he is an amalgamation of three famous villains -
Gaston of Beauty and the Beast, who inspires his personality,
Weapon X (Wolverine) from X-Men echoes his past,
and The Golden-Winged Great Peng, an ego driven villain from a Journey to the West (JTTW) maps his future.
Upon meeting Pen, the Builder quickly learns that he is a rude man whose capacity for self-idolatry and smug superiority is boundless. People are chess pieces to be played by him, which means every moment Pen is awake he is strategizing against the world. He is his own fortress built so secure that no one could ever enter.
There is a hint of light inside.
For those who romance him, to be close to Pen is to be inches and miles apart at once. His mask and his persona are kept at quite a distance.
Pen is driven by ego. He is a man who will take but never give. He uses others for personal gain then moves to the next. He could kill anyone for any reason without remorse.
Pen’s boasting is truer than false, regardless of subject matter.
In Sandrock's jail he is mostly honest with the Builder. The letter, challenge, and gifts goodbye are as heartfelt as he could muster. The Builder lit a tiny spark inside the vast dark void of Pen’s internal fortress.
“I can fix him.”
No, no, that is untrue. His walls are far too fortified for one pickaxe to break through. None of the reasons are Pen’s fault. However, he is at fault for his actions. It begs the question of whether he is redeemable.
This theory will answer that question.
[It may also spoil act two, My Time at Atara. Please forgive me.]
The History – The Story so Far
My Time at Sandrock is act one of a three act story. The series foreshadows a sequel, My Time at Atara, followed by My Time at Lucien.
Act One has many pop culture references. Pen’s story, specifically, alludes to The Beauty and the Beast, The Lion King, and A Journey to the West (TV). While the first two stand out the third may not be recognizable.
In the JTTW TV series, Peng is an antagonist. In one famous scene, a magical weapon known as the Ji Flask is used by Peng to trap his enemies. His nemesis, Sun Wukong, is unable to defeat Peng directly, so he sneaks into Peng’s lair and alters the flask’s internal balance to render it ineffective. This tampering plays a crucial role in neutralizing Peng’s advantage, thus allowing the protagonist, Sun, to eventually subdue him.
The adapted TV story fits the events of the first battle at Martle’s Square.
The TV series alters key plot points from the novel to fit the format. Because the novel differs, it may foreshadow act two of Pen’s journey. It may also reveal Pen's true character. Knowing the NPCs in play at the end of Portia and Sandrock, my theory is act two will follow Peng's journey in the novel.
Note: Mythological folklore and JTTW hints at Pen's family connections, so continue at your own risk.
---------------------------------
The Divinity – Pen’s Act Two
Behind the game counters in Portia and Sandrock is a prize; a book titled, Journey to the East. This easter egg hints that upcoming plotlines could mirror a Journey to the West, which is the story of Sun Wukong, The Legendary Monkey King.
In the novel, Sun Wukong is a monkey born from a stone who acquires supernatural powers through Taoist practices. After rebelling against heaven, he is imprisoned under a mountain by the Buddha. Five hundred years later, he accompanies the monk Tang Sanzang, and two other disciples, Zhu Bajie and Sha Wujing, on a journey to obtain Buddhist sutras.
Howlett’s Hunters, with Haru in the role of Tang Sanzang and Logan as Sun Wukong, follow the pilgrims path. The gang will probably be tracking Pen, who escapes from maximum security prison.
Side note: Logan plays an important role in Pen's journey. In act two, Logan’s story will continue his "Logan years" Wolverine path (more later), while also tying into Pen’s story via Sun Wukong’s path.
Pen is in the role of Great Peng, and he will have two, yet unknown, allies. The action sequences that follow the novel are summarized and theorized below.
On the westward pilgrimage led by Tang Sanzang, the disciples face many trials, yet none as formidable as the Golden-Winged Great Peng. Sun Wukong cannot defeat him alone. Midway along their route lies Lion Camel Ridge, a fortress positioned along the historic passage from China to India. Once a refuge for monks seeking sacred scriptures, it becomes Peng’s chosen stronghold—isolated, defensible, and placed to control the path.
Driven by revenge, arrogance and hunger for power, Peng plots to capture Tang Sanzang and perform a ritual granting immortality and ultimate power. His pride pushes him to defy the celestial order, believing himself strong enough to challenge even divine authority, including the Buddha himself. To secure his domain, Peng and his two allies—the Azure Lion Demon and the Yellow-Tusked Elephant Demon—wage war on all who approach, striking travelers and gods alike, spreading violence through the region to strike terror into the hearts of people.
In Pen’s story, the stronghold represents his isolation and fear of the world around him. He is an eagle trapped in a cage of mind, ready to strike out at any threat. Pen is all base instincts with high intelligence. A weapon.
The fortress is a manifestation of Pen’s insecurities, arrogance, and desire for retribution at all costs.
The Golden-Winged Great Peng, born of the primordial phoenix, stands as the sibling of the Peacock Mahāmāyūrī and uncle, through her, to the Buddha. His brilliance and ferocity can only be contained by greater spiritual power. The Azure Lion and Yellow-Tusked Elephant, once noble beast disciples of the bodhisattva Samantabhadra, now serve him in rebellion, turning Lion Camel Ridge into a fortress that instills fear in those who dare approach it.
In the My Time series, Mali is the Peacock and Howlett is the primordial Phoenix. That means Howlett fled Duvos and left behind a young Mali and infant Pen.
When Tang Sanzang becomes separated from his disciples, the demons seize their moment. They capture the monk and imprison him within the ridge, preparing a ritual sacrifice to claim his spiritual essence. Realizing Tang’s disappearance, Sun Wukong tracks the demons to their lair and infiltrates their fortress.
At this point, Pen may be setting a trap for Logan by kidnapping Haru as bait. Pen is known to administer poison via a “pen” syringe to his enemies - especially poisons that work slowly as a means of torture.
Wukong first confronts the Azure Lion Demon, a vast, radiant beast of golden-blue fur and unmatched agility. Calling upon the lion’s master, Manjushri Bodhisattva, Wukong witnesses the divine descent that restores the lion to his true form as a mount. The next battle is against the Yellow-Tusked Elephant, an immense and mighty opponent, until Samantabhadra answers Wukong’s summons and reclaims his mount.
At last, Peng himself appears, more powerful than either ally. Wukong’s strength falters as Peng’s fury overwhelms him, forcing the disciple to invoke the Buddha for aid. The Buddha answers, revealing Peng’s true form and compelling him to surrender.
Now the stories will diverge into a woven narrative for a compelling resolution. The Buddha role is split into two characters set to aid Logan and defeat Pen.
The alternate Buddhas are Mali, and Django.
Mali, as a Flying Pig and Pen’s sister, is most likely working to track Pen in parallel with Howlett’s Hunters. The two groups may converge at just the right time to rescue Haru and Logan.
In My Time at Portia, Django fought to aid the Flying Pigs against the Rogue Knight. Logic would dictate that if Mali were tracking her psychotic-cold-blooded-killing-super-soldier-younger-brother, he would be a good choice to have as back up.
After the battle, Wukong frees Tang Sanzang, and the pilgrims reunite to continue their journey. Humbled, Peng is taken to Vulture Peak, the mountain sanctified by the Buddha’s presence. There, he submits to divine wisdom, serving the Buddha in atonement and bringing his reign of terror to an end.
To build the narrative, Django – the Storm Knight - is modeled after Vajrapāṇi - 'holder of the thunderbolt', who is one of the earliest-appearing bodhisattvas in Mahayana Buddhism. He is the protector and guide of Gautama Buddha and rose to symbolize the Buddha's power.
During the battle between Pen and Django, Logan's family connection may be revealed by Pen. The result of such revelation could open the door to a more mutual understanding.
-----------------------------------
The Family – Pen’s Familial Ties
Howlett and Logan are names that belong to Wolverine. In Pen’s past he was experimented on by the military to make him stronger (it was shared by a Duvos soldier in earshot of the builder). Moreover, it foreshadows that Pen’s story is adapted from aspects of Weapon X.
Together, Howlett, Logan, and Pen form a triangle representing three periods of Wolverine’s life and reflect the consequences of Howlet’s choices during those times.
Father - Howlett:
Wolverine: "Born as James Howlett to a wealthy Canadian family at the end of the 19th century, he was forced to abandon his family after the tragic manifestation of his bestial abilities of accelerated healing factor, keenly enhanced senses and sharp bone claws in each hand."
MTAS: Howlett abandoned his family due to circumstances beyond his control. He later married Carmen at the Blue Moon, and they opted to make Sandrock their home. They remained a family until Logan turned four years old. It was then Carmen quietly abandoned Howlett and Logan, never to return. In this mirror, Carmen symbolizes karma.
Folklore: The Fenghuang has positive connotations. It is a symbol of virtue and grace. In Chinese mythology, the Fenghuang is believed to have a close association with the emperor and is considered a symbol of the imperial family.
It is often depicted alongside the dragon, which represents the emperor himself.
Together, the Fenghuang and the dragon symbolize the balance between yin and yang, representing the harmony and unity of nature.
Legend holds that in primordial times, the original phoenix (Fenghuang), the leader of flying beings, gave birth to the peacock and to the eagle named the Golden-Winged Great Peng.
Howlett, (Yin/Phoenix) is the brother of the Emperor of Duvos (Yang/Dragon).
Sister - Mali (eldest)
Mali is a known adventurer, and based on her mythological counterpart, could be an expert dealing with poisons and venom. It’s likely that her skill set will save the lives of Haru and Logan during the fight with Pen at his stronghold.
Mali is antithetical to Pen and is sure to be a strong ally to the Alliance. She will most likely play an important role in the lives of Pen and Logan in the future.
My Time at Portia: Mali is a tough adventurer with the Flying Pigs who arrives during the main plot, briefly interacts with the player, and features in missions tied to accessing the Western Plateau and nearby ruins; later in the All Source storyline, she reports her aircraft was ambushed and shot down over the Eufaula Desert but survives and returns to aid the effort against the Sky Sharks.
Folklore: Mahāmāyūrī Vidyārājñī means “Great Peacock Wisdom Queen.”
Mahamayuri is believed to have the power to protect devotees from poisoning, either physical or spiritual.
In Buddhism, her demeanor is in contrast to the wrathful attitudes of male personifications of the Wisdom Kings.
She dispels curses, demons, and malevolent spirits, and may grant wishes, protect kings, and ensure safe journeys.
Pen - The Middle Child
Wolverine: "Unfortunately, by acting as a lone wolf, Logan was an unwitting subject of the Weapon X Program and had his bones coated in indestructible Adamantium, thus becoming an even more lethal asset."
The key word is unwitting. Logan (Wolverine) never chose what happened to him. He was deceived into believing he was serving a greater cause but was seized and remade into a weapon—his body reforged in adamantium. He was broken by relentless torture then torn open then remade against his will.
Like Wolverine, Pen is both a victim and a dangerous weapon.
Psychologist Suzana E. Flores interprets Weapon X as a study of torture—the psychology of both victim and perpetrator, and how systems transform people into instruments of cruelty.
It explores objectification: the reduction of a being to function, denying autonomy, identity, and subjectivity.
Flores compares the scientists of Weapon X to the medical professionals of 40’s Germany, drawing parallels to well-known obedience studies.
Through this lens, Pen’s story becomes one of dehumanization and survival, where his pride is forged from pain (and a denial of autonomy).
MTAS: Due to Howlett’s abandonment - whether by force, choice, or duty - Pen had to endure life under the emperor’s thumb. One day he finds himself on a mission to Sandrock - only to come face to face with the father who left (or fled?) Duvos when he was an infant, and a half-brother who could threaten his very future.
Pen’s instincts are dark. The death of Howlett is more complex than initially established in Sandrock. If Pen knowingly dished out his sense of justice against Howlett - was it revenge? anger in the moment? a sense of justice?
Any which way, Pen attacked Howlett for a whole lot more than his uncovering of the Duvos operation.
My initial asks were if Pen felt betrayed by Howlett? Was he raised to hate Howlett as an enemy of Duvos? Did he think Howlett and Logan were threats to his lineage? All or none of the above?
At the Starship Ruins, Pen was confronted by Logan, the Builder, and Justice. His brother and the builder were now allies waging battle against him. And he lost.
At the end, Pen's perception could be that he was imprisoned because of actions taken by Howlett, Logan, and the emperor. I'm curious to learn Pen's interpretation of events and whether his past experiences alter how he interprets the world.
Speculative Title: The Crown Prince of Duvos
[Side note: My interpretation is that Pen did not attempt to kill Justice and the Builder, but he did want them out of the way. It's why when Logan intervened, instead of firing at them, he sealed them behind a door. Interpretations may vary.]
Half Brother - Logan (mother is Carmen, youngest)
Wolverine: "Adopting the name Logan, he wandered the world, living a long life filled with blood, war, and betrayal, having vile Sabretooth as his archenemy, and the Japanese warrior Ogun as his sensei. "
Act two of Logan’s self-discovery is set to follow the westward path as he ventures to uncover his origins. Pen mirrors Sabretooth as his rival, though his journey follows that of Great Peng. Django likely embodies Ogun, in that he will eventually become Logan's mentor.
Logan’s travels with Howlett’s Hunter's draws him back into a world of blood, war, and betrayal, where he faces the consequences of his father’s past.
Yet, despite the chaos in his family, Logan is resilient. His early years were steadied by a strong support system; even with Howlett’s detachment, Logan’s foundation allowed him to develop solid values. His mother’s disappearance leaves an emotional scar, yet it does not consume him—it strengthens his empathy instead.
As the timeline unfolds, Logan’s understanding deepens. He will first uncover the truth about Carmen and her side of the family in My Time at Evershine, before learning of Pen and Mali in My Time at Atara. Each revelation brings him closer to comprehending the full scope of his family legacy and his place in it.
Uncle/Father Role - The Emperor
He is the mystery - the one who is placed in the Buddha role.
Succession: The title of emperor was hereditary, traditionally passed on from father to son in each dynasty. There are also instances where the throne is assumed by a younger brother, should the deceased emperor have no male offspring. By convention in most dynasties, the eldest son born to the empress consort succeeded to the throne.
In an attempt to resolve after-death disputes, the emperor, while still living, often designated a crown prince.
Even such a clear designation, however, was often thwarted by jealousy and distrust, whether it was the crown prince plotting against the emperor, or brothers plotting against each other.
Heir: If Mali is the eldest, it explains why Howlett left shortly after Pen was born. Pen was never meant to be Howlett’s son. Mali was a byproduct of the male succession line. Her childhood is unknown.
During a play date, Pen stated he was fighting as early as he could remember. To that end, he lived an incredibly violent life. In turn, he was praised everywhere as the Crown Prince.
Pen could feel untouchable if he had the protection of the emperor. To commit violent and illegal acts without fear of retribution could make Pen feel God-like in his power. He may look down on everyone, by design.
It seems Pen is a man who gets what he wants, when he wants it, with no regard for anyone else.
However, the emperor volunteered Pen for an experiment to make him stronger. We do not know exactly what was done, but he may have been broken, twisted, and reformed into something else.
Relationship: Mali, Pen, and Logan’s uncle. Brother to Howlett.
Mother - The Empress
Mother (to Mali and Pen): If the emperor was unable to produce children he may have ordered his brother, Howlett, to produce an heir through the Empress’s family to secure the line of succession. Once Pen was born, Howlett's purpose was fulfilled.
The Ally – Django (not family)
My Time at Portia: Django is a Peach Plaza restaurateur and rumored ex-knight who owns The Round Table. He spends days cooking or practicing swordplay outside the door and serves as a well-liked hub for town gossip. Late in the story he intervenes in The Final Battle and reveals his “Storm Knight” prowess against the Rogue Knight,
Folklore: Django is modeled after Vajrapāṇi, also called Chana Dorji and Chador and extensively represented in as one of the earliest three protective deities or bodhisattvas surrounding the Buddha.
The Solidarity – Pen and Logan Bond
At the end of My Time at Atara. The three warriors, Django, Logan, and Pen will take on a role like that of bodhisattvas and become true protectors. Each will symbolize one of the Buddha's virtues:
Mañjuśrī (Pen) manifests all the Buddhas' wisdom,
Avalokiteśvara (Logan) manifests all the Buddhas' immense compassion, and
Vajrapāni (Django) protects Buddha - and manifests all the Buddhas power.
The trio could then journey to Lucien with Mali and The Flying Pigs to prepare for war against Duvos.
The Destiny - A Brotherhood of Justice
Future: Due to Pen’s actions, he may be removed from the line of succession. Thus meaning, that the next heir to the Duvos throne -could be his brother Logan.
As for Pen’s redemption arc and future as a romanceable character, well - as Django once quoted -
"A noble knight's burden is a curse of loneliness; to silently give while expecting nothing in return. Those who see the lone knight see a man surrounded by a hard shell of cold armor, and yet, they are unable to imagine the tenderness that lies beneath."
Closing Thoughts: To those who romanced Pen – it impacted him. He felt something “deeper than a space punch.” It might have meant more to him because the builder didn’t know his identity. He was free to let himself be open, even if only but a little.
After all, he dropped a ring, and an easter egg for the builder to find. To get that far was maybe enough to put a dent in the fortress surrounding Pen’s heart.
It will be curious to meet the version of Pen who will appear in act three. Will he be a sacrificial lamb? An eligible bachelor? A stalwart protector? A mighty warrior? All the above?
One thing for sure is that his next iteration is going to break us. At least now we know he’ll do it figuratively, instead of literally.
Until then, “stay humble.”
Source links:
A Journey to the West (Great Peng, Sun Wukong)
The Golden-Winged Great Peng (links to Fenghuang/Peacock/Buddha) - Pen
Fenghuang/Phoenix (link to Buddha/Dragon) - Howlett
The Great Peacock/alt Buddha (links Vajrapani) - Mali
On the first day of a new playthrough the builder bumped into Pen before heading to City Hall. It's funny to meet him and then have him pretend to mistake the builder for one of Logan's gang. Especially after he had just won two hands of Critters.
Pen's either diabolical, or flirty - can't decide.
My gosh I love this game so much! This build started out by flipping a workshop sign over and wondering how I could use it in a design. The next thing I know I'm building a gilded gothic goliath in the heart of Sandrock. I'm in shock that the idea worked out.
It's most definitely more of an art piece than a functioning workshop since it takes up most of the yard. However, once I weaved my way through the series of mazes created by randomly placed stairs and entryways, the interior layout proved highly functional.
The next step is furnishing it and then marrying half the town to fill it with people. The house has four masters, each with a private bath, and each children's room has its own bath as well.
It's going to take a lot of jacuzzis, but I"m up for the challenge.
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Hey all, just a public safety announcement from a fellow fan. If you are renovating the workshop and delete the room(s) with the cribs, the kids will leave.
My builder's kids were found later in the evening attending a town hall meeting. Do you see the direction the toddler is crawling? Oh yes, he took the LONG way home. My builder picked up the baby and followed him up the hill, past the temple, down the hill, past the game center, through the tunnel, and finally home.
The little dude went right to bed.
The good news is they soon grew up and morphed into one creature. We named it Sloth.
It's been quite a journey from level 6 to 7. The exterior is complete and now my focus is on the interior. Afterward, it's on to level 8. I have no idea where this build is headed, but I look forward to getting there.
"Stay Humble" at twilight - continued:
Early afternoon:
After Dark:
The Fam:
The date in-game is Spring 24, Y2. Marker is now in his preschool years, and Crayon is a rambunctious toddler who spends her day spinning in circles at the highest point of the workshop (I should have named her Compass). Anyway, keeping up with her is exhausting - for Pen. Mwahahaha. That man will speed across town like the Dickens to change a diaper, so he can't be all bad.
Not long ago, my Builder and Pen, along with their two children, Marker and Crayon, were enjoying e-life in a quaint Sandrock workshop. Then one day, the evil game owner, me, had to free up space to fix a save error, but in doing so, mistakenly poofed the family out of existence.
Yep, I deleted the profile. My blue-haired Builder was no more. I had humbled the Stay Humble workshop into oblivion.
I blinked.
Here is the final picture of version 1.0. It stayed humble while it lasted.
May we include a moment of silence for the lovely family:
(Insert quiet time)
After a moment of reflection, I was ready to move forward with version 2.0. Although, for it to work, it had to be meeker, quainter, homier, and much more meager! The situation called for an immediate speed run.
Anxious to get on with it, the new Skinny married Pen by Autumn 7, Y1. Marker was born on the 5th of Winter, followed by Crayon on the 21st. The workshop reached level 7 by the 5th of Spring, Y2. I was now back where I started.
You know, besides having lost a workshop, my builder, and story progression - the only major change was my perspective. Here, for example, was the first version of the 2.0 workshop.
I deemed it sufficient for a rebuild, but then asked, “What would Pen do?”
My knee jerk reaction was to add height, as shown below:
Yeah, maybe I should have named it "Jack Rabbit" instead.
Alas, it wasn't right, it was far too manly for a humble workshop. Moreover, my builder deserved better than to reside in a giant love rocket. So, after failing to Jedi mind trick the shop into proper form, my Pen perspective needed retooling.
That's when the obvious occurred to me - the shop didn't need height, it needed to bulk up instead! The epiphany meant a major course correction. The top got turtled and I focused on adding mass - like the 'roid rage men on TikTok.
Finally, after several lifts, nips, and tucks the shop could be deemed Pen worthy. Maybe I'll coin the design style, Victorian Sandpunk.
And now, for the very first time in Sandrock history, I present to you a sneak peek of "Stay Humble 2.0," in all its (less) erect glory:
I'm working on a separate post for the remaining exterior shots, but until then - stay humble.
View photos of the 1.0 workshop at the #mtas humble tag below.
The original level 5 workshop now has two bedrooms to make space for a couple of energetic toddlers. The lot is at level 6 but decorated as though it is the end of the game.
With 80k gols on hand, it's time to expand to level 7, but before that I wanted to capture 6 in all its glory. Once 7 is fully decorated, I'll share an update.
This amazing day happened because my builder was late gathering materials to build Lefu's jacuzzi. Instead, they decided to finish up the next day. That morning, Pen woke at the workshop instead of leaving for the airship, so my builder asked him to follow.
Pen fought for Sandrock until Daisy left for the Northern Plateau. After that, Pen stopped following.
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Logan was impossible to knock down but Pen's Space Punch™ ultimately won him the battle. The fight was popcorn worthy entertainment, so I will AU again.
This is a small, level 5 lot, but it's decorated as if it were level 10. The date is 4.8 in Y1 and my builder and Pen are married with a baby due soon.
Of course, this could only mean a workshop expansion is on the horizon... Let's see if they, and the workshop, can "Stay Humble."
Today, I was collecting some Pen photobombs for a future post when I stumbled upon screenshots I took of Stev's jail speech. What got me was that the screenshot folder intermingled the shots with those of Pen's jail speech to Burgess. Seeing them together, well, I about choked on my coffee.
HOW DID I NOT SEE IT UNTIL NOW! I mean, I always thought Stev was talking about Pen, but now I'm convinced.
The screenshots and further discussion are under the cut. I'd love to read your interpretations of both conversations as well.
Now, some may argue that it's foreshadowing Stev's journey to Evershine, but the dialog was written when they were making MTAS. At that point, they had no idea Stev would become popular enough to bring back for another game.
The context of this scene is set so the builder begins by listening to Burgess and Dan-bi speak with Pen. Afterward, it sets up the Builder to speak with Pen directly. The last step is to approach Stev before taking the stairs to leave.
The Duvos soldiers drop a few hints about Pen while in town, but this scene is pure foreshadowing. The entirety of it was designed to deliver the player a powerful message.
"Everyone deserves a second chance." In video games, yes, they do.
Including interior and exterior this project took about six months.
Headcanon: My builder is married to Pen and has two children with him. The Builder is as self-obsessed as Pen is, which means they are in constant competition. The decor reflects their personalities.
Please keep in mind this house tour is end game so the pics may include late game events. The video is nine minutes long, please forgive the length as it's a REALLY BIG house on a level 10 lot.
Chutes and Ladders is its name, and you'll see why.
For this workshop my goal was for it to neatly fit a level 10 lot but not take up too much ground space. After six months I finally finished the exterior and interior.
In December, I posted an earlier version on Reddit (level 7), but this result is quite different.
By making the ground level rooms smaller they mimic tiny store fronts instead of being connected to a massive workshop. It was a bit of a twist that worked out. It's a bonus that the house is very functional in its layout.
Pics of Pen's rooms were posted a bit earlier. I will probably post pics of the house/yard/rooms in smaller chunks because it's a lot of house to photograph.
I may have gone a bit overboard, but it was a lot of fun to build.
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“Anyway, since you were easily one of the top three lovers I've ever known, and the only one I still have the address for, I've decided to offer a symbol of my forgiveness.” Pen.
This is a great line. I’d argue that it’s one of the kindest sentiments Pen shares with the builder, albeit in his own underhanded way, of course.
In Sandrock, Pen’s incapable of getting past himself to love anyone. But with the builder, he hints they might be running a close second in the race for his affection. Granted, only he would ever win, but for Pen, it’s significant that he lets the builder run on the track.
In my interpretation of Pen speak, he’s sharing that while in Sandrock he was only ever seeing the builder. He doesn’t have the fortitude to show vulnerability, so instead he gives a compliment but masks it with a slight. While this is a common manipulation tactic for Pen, in this instance, it’s more about hiding his vulnerability than playing mind games.
It was when I wrote about Pen’s Last Words that I reread the letter from prison. After knowing what was in the treasure, the letter hit differently. In it, Pen disassociates the builder from his other partners by stating, “and the only one I still have the address for,” which brings it to the present and the builder is the only lover left standing.
For Pen, this was most likely achieved by imagining all his former lovers pitted against each other in a mud wrestling competition whereupon the builder emerged victorious with mud stuck in their eyes and toes and of course they leapt into Pen’s arms and Pen declared them his winner winner if they buy him a chicken dinner.
Then, he rigs up a cave, ditches the little black book, and it’s all fine until his plan goes pecs up after he betrays Sandrock.
Still though, it’s a great sentence.
Pen pic was made by the talented @ynindusty. I giggled way too hard when I saw it. Thank you for letting me share.