Sucker For Life🤸🏾‍♀️✨

So a few months ago I met this girl online who hit me up and was like “Hey let’s be friends” and I agreed. We started talking, sharing things about each other and ended up hitting it off so well that we had to see each other in person and hang out.

I told her we should smoke and do face masks and she agreed to come over to my place, we’d match and do the masks.

Before she came over I had already smoked so I was high way before she got there. But when she did arrive, I was chilling, I was wearing a t-shirt w/no bra and panties and told her to roll up. So she did, we set the blunt aside and before we put our masks on I said to her, get comfortable because she had on jeans and shit. She doesn’t hesitate to strip down to her bra and panties and I’m mesmerized because her body looks so fucking good.

So I lay my head in her lap and close my eyes while she’s putting my mask on and then we switch and I do the same for her. Our face masks are on, she just picked a movie on Netflix, and we ready to spark a blunt.

I spark it, she still laying in my lap and I’m just staring at her titties like damn, I just wanna suck them a little bit lol. I can see she has a fat ass pussy because it’s damn near hanging out her panties and all this day dreaming goes straight to my pussy and I get super wet.

So we keep passing the blunt back and forth, not really talking cause i’m already high, and the movie is actually good. We finish the first blunt and she’s like, “Cuddle with me” and i’m like hell yeah but let’s wash our masks off first, so she gets up out of my lap, we wash our faces and then she lays beside me, and I wrap my arms around her making sure my head is right on her titties she she’s a little bit above me and laying on her back while i’m on my side.

I say to her “your titties are so sexy” and she laughs and goes “you can’t even see them” and then takes her bra off and says “now you can say that” and all I do is laugh. In my head i’ve already decided i wanna do something with this girl so i’m like fuck it, and I start rubbing and playing with her titties. She doesn’t stop me or say anything, so I start licking and sucking her nipples. Right now I have one titty in my mouth still watching the movie and I notice her hand has slipped down to her pussy, so I slide my hand down and can feel her wetness from outside her panties. I pull her panties to the side and slip 2 fingers in and she lets out a quiet moan. So I lay they sucking her titties still and playing with her pussy for a while. I take my fingers out her pussy and suck them and she tastes so good, I decide to go down on her. I knew she saw it coming cause as soon as I put my head under the covers she put both her knees in the air.

Okay so these are tips that can make a hoes life so much easier. Enjoy 💕💕

1. Throw away any shaving cream use coconut butter or oil to shave, than apply oil after you dry off. BAM. NO STUBBLE. NO BURN. IT’S THE SHIT.

2. Don’t use shaving cream or coconut butter for your coochie. Use Johnson’s baby oil instead. You’ll have no razor burn.

3. There isn’t anything wrong with your natural coochie smell, but if you want to taste sweet eat cranberries or pineapple. SHIT WORKS.

4. Stretch marks on inner thighs? Use Vaseline and coconut oil over night EVERY NIGHT to get rid of them.

5. Men’s razors >>> womens razors. Cheaper, closer shave and cleaner.

6. Pee after sex. It’ll help prevent any UTIs. Don’t hold it in. UPDATE: I’ve changed it now, but this used to say pee to stop STIs, that is INCORRECT, and the only thing to stop STIs is a condom. Thank you to @infinitelaughing for correcting me!

7. Carry your own condoms. You’re a strong independent hoe and carry your Trojans proud.

8. If you’re braking out buy tea tree oil.

9. KAT VON D LIQUID LIPSTICKS ARE BLOWJOB PROOF. IT WILL NOT COME OFF. PLUS IT’S MATTE.

10. Matte makeup (foundation, lipstick, eyeliner) all lasts better against sheets for sex.

11. Want longer nails to scratch with? GARLIC ON NAIL BEDS. COCONUT OIL ON CUTICLES. GROW BITCHES GROW.

12. To make eyebrows fuller put on coconut oil before bed.

13. Add ½ cup of apple cider vinegar to your bath. It’ll reset the balance of your coochie’s PH. You’ll feel and smell r8 8/8

14. Run a hot bath. Favourite bubble bath. Soak. EXFOLIATE. When you get out put coconut oil all over your body.

15. Honey + white sugar - lip scrub Coconut oil + brown sugar - body exfoliator

16. Dry feet are nasty af. Soak feet in hot water for 10 minutes before using a pumice stone to get rid of dead skin.

17. For extra soft feet, do above and put on heavy duty lotion, socks and sleep.

18. To hide a hickey. Green concealer all over, foundation and powder. GONE.

19. To remove blackheads use charcoal based soap. And use natural beaded exfoliants

20. If you want your coochie to be BABY SOFT get yoni oil. Shit is magical.

21. If your hair is feeling lifeless massage coconut oil in every night + put in a bun. Wash out in the morning.

22. Put your undies in three categories. 1. I’m getting fucked tonight 2. I could be spontaneously fucked. 3. Getting none today

23. On the days leading up to and after your period use a pad on your fav undies to stop staining.

24. Eyebrows can be on fleek fucking in a forest. Get Anastasia dipbrow pomade. Lifesaver.

25. 6-10 green tea bags in a bath will help energise skin and refresh. Skin will glow and be soft.

26. If you’re about to get dicked down DON’T wear cotton undies. It will trap lint in the crevice of your thighs.

27. Chlorasceptic throat numbing medication helps with deep throating.

28. DRINK WATER. cliché af but keep coochie smelling good and brightens skin.

29. Lemon juice and baking soda will remove any cum stains from clothes. I got you 😏

30. It’s your body. Don’t fucking listen to anyone

31. Shave your coochie under water

32. Put baby oil in your bath - baby soft duck yeah