Order 66 AU where Obi-Wan—being, well, Obi-Wan—completely misreads the situation when Cody shoots him during the purge and decides, with absolute conviction, that it was an extremely aggressive form of flirting.
Naturally, this leads to Obi-Wan acquiring a feral, still-chipped Cody and dragging him across the galaxy on his various misadventures.
Cody, meanwhile, is relentless. Every possible opportunity is a murder attempt. Blaster shots, ambushes, trying to push Obi-Wan off cliffs, sneaking poison into his food—anything.
Obi-Wan, however, remains entirely unbothered.
Cody fires at him? Obi-Wan deflects the bolts and smiles softly like he has just been written a haiku.
At one point, Cody lunges at Obi-Wan with a vibroblade in front of Bail. Obi-Wan smoothly disarms Cody in a single motion, lightly holding Cody’s wrist as he sighs and says, blushing faintly,”Not in front of Bail, dear one,” like it’s foreplay.
This whole situation is so utterly baffling to Cody that it basically short-circuits his chip.
The moment Cody’s free Obi-Wan’s getting shaken within an inch of his life,“YOU KRIFFING DI’KUT, I WAS NOT FLIRTING! I WAS TRYING TO KILL YOU!!! WHAT DO YOU THINK FLIRTING IS?!”
Obi-Wan blinks at him, completely thrown. “…Oh. So you don’t like me.”
Cody makes a strangled noise that’s somewhere between a yell and a groan. “YES, I LIKE YOU, YOU DI’KUT!”
I did in fact end up writing it and it is titled “Gimme! Gimme! Gimme!” since I for some reason instantly associate Obi-Wan with ABBA. The A03 link for the completed story below so check it out 🔗 :
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