Anyone seen the driver?
Currently sat on the train without moving anywhere. This time the problem is that they have "lost the driver", an interesting problem considering we are half way through our journey.

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@matttyrer
Anyone seen the driver?
Currently sat on the train without moving anywhere. This time the problem is that they have "lost the driver", an interesting problem considering we are half way through our journey.

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Spring Chicken (not a reference to my elderly brother)
Happy Valentine’s Day
14th February 2014
Looking forward to a romantic day conducting joint money laundering steering group policy reviews.
At last, thanks to Kevin Brown, an effective(ish), discreet and stylish solution to my eyesight deficiencies.
I know I look awesome either way, but facial furniture, yes or no?

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When updating your cv you want to be concise, but when you have this sort of legacy of achievement, it's tough to be selective
Rocking the Howard & Hilda look
Today's beautiful beach is Carlyon Bay, Cornwall
Saints Quiz
By Matt Tyrer for ComeOnYouSaints.com
7th April 2012
Recently Teimana Harrison became the 101st player to have played for the Saints under Jim Mallinder's reign (I don't think i've missed anyone!). So the simple question...name the other 100! They have to have featured in a competitive fixture (NL1, EDF Nat Cup, Prem, Amlin, HC, LV), since the start of the 2007/08 season when Jim took over. Friendlies don't count. They also have to have actually got on the field to count (there are a couple of players who were selected but were only ever unused subs who are excluded from this). It doesn't matter whether they are in the full squad, academy, trialists, whatever - all that matters is that they have played for the first team under Jim. To help, I've listed below how many players there have been per starting letter of their surname. A - 4 B - 6 C - 8 D - 8 E - 5 F - 4 G - 5 H - 9 (Including Teimana Harrison, so 8 left to get) I - 1 K - 2 L - 6 M - 11 N - 2 P - 3 R - 5 S - 11 T - 3 V - 4 W - 4 Of course it's possible to look this up on the Offy/Google, but in spirit of this, see how many you get from memory! If you want to post answers, then do so, but please restrict it to one post per letter so we can keep track!
Answers:
Ansbro, Artemyev, Ashton, Armstrong Broster, Bonorino, Best, Budgen, Brake, Browne Clarke, Clark, Commins, Cannon, Craig, Cairns, Cato, Cornwell Day C, Dowson, Dickson L, Downey, Diggin, Dickens, Dreyer, Doran-Jones Eustace, Easter, Elliott, Everitt, Emms Fernandez-Lobbe, Foden, Ford, Fox Gray S, Gray J, Geraghty, Greenhalgh, Glynn Hartley, Haywood, Hicks, Harrison, Hoy, Hughes, Harries, Howard J, Hopley Ingle Kruger, Kydd Long, Lawes, Lamb, Lord, Lewitt, Lamont Mujati, Myler, Mercey, McMillan, Manoa, May, Morris, Murray, Mordt, Milligan, Mayor Nutley, Neale Powell, Pisi G, Prescott Reihana, Robinson, Rudzki, Rae, Roberts Spencer, Sanderson, Sorenson, Starling, Smith, Stewart, Shields, Short, Sharman, Sempere, Sigley Tupai, Tonks, Tonga’uiha Visser, Vickers, Vickerman, Vass Wilson R, Wood, Waller A, Ward
The two players who were selected by Jim but never got a game due to being unused subs were two Grants, Anderson & Pointer. They probably would have featured for Saints were it not for the games they were selected for being unexpectedly close. Grant Anderson was an unused sub in the 24-23 win over Newbury in 2007 whilst Grant Pointer was unused in the 21-20 defeat to Bath in the midweek Prem match at the Rec in 2010.
Summer Rugby Quiz
By Matt Tyrer for ComeOnYouSaints.com
June 5 2012
As England are about to take on South Africa in a three test series, whilst England youngsters are also in South Africa for the Under20’s world championship, as well as it being the Saints off season with not too much going on here, I thought I’d try a fill the void with a topical quiz.
All questions relate to England rugby and have either some sort of South African or Northampton connection (and sometimes both). If the connection is not obvious from the question, then you have a clue with regards the answer!
All the answers are sourced from that most antiquated of mediums, a book, called “The Official England Miscellany” (Fourth Edition, Vision Sports Publishing 2011), which had facts that applied up to, but not including, the 2011 world cup. However, I don’t believe any of the answers are out dated as a result of what has happened since, although of course some questions may become outdated following the upcoming tour.
The questions are in no particular order.
1.
The last player to score a full house (try, conversion, penalty & drop goal in the same game) for England did so against South Africa. Who was it?
2.
Which player holds the English record for most number of conversions (15) successfully kicked in one game?
3.
What is Jannes Labuschagne noted for with regards England v South Africa international history?
4.
Johnny Wilkinson is England’s top all time points scorer by a country mile, but who is second on the list?
5.
Who said in 1994 “Being dropped by England and Take That splitting up on the same day is enough to finish anyone off”?
6.
Jack Rowell named how many Bath players in the England match day squad of 21 to play South Africa in Cape Town in 1994 – a record England representation from a single club side?
7.
Who is the tallest player to have played for England (6ft 10)?
8.
Which England player has scored most tries against South Africa in their career?
9.
Randolf & Ferdy Ashton and Japie & Jannie Krige were two sets of international rugby playing brothers who have what uniquely in common?
10.
What have William Milton, Frank Mitchell, Reggie Schwarz, Reginald Hands & CB van Ryneveld got in common that extends beyond just rugby?
11.
Which player holds the record for most number of points scored against England in a single match?
12.
Which Transvaal born England rugby international fought in the Battle of the Somme in WW1 and spent three and a half years in a Japanese prisoner of war camp working on the notorious Railway of Death in Siam (latter day Thailand) in WW2, was a finalist in the World Ballroom Dancing Championships, declined to represent Great Britain in the Olympic Games in 1920 in the Modern Pentathlon due to his rugby commitments, played rugby for the British Lions against his native South Africa, was South Africa amateur light heavyweight boxing champion in 1921, a Polo international for England, played tennis for South Africa in the Davis Cup, won a mixed doubles title at Wimbledon and was awarded a CBE in 1946?
13.
Ben Cohen, Steve Thompson and Courtney Lawes all played amateur rugby early in their careers for which club?
14.
England’s first ever match played under floodlights was against Argentina on 27th May 1995 at which venue?
15.
Which two England players (one of them Saint, the other who is still on TV a lot) played their final game for England in England’s last amateur test match (the 3rd place play-off match vs France in Pretoria in the 1995 world cup) and therefore can be regarded as England’s final amateur players?
16.
Which England hooker made his debut starting in England’s first test match of the professional era versus South Africa at Twickenham in November 1995 and, therefore, can be said to be England’s first professional player?
17.
South Africa were the first international team to accomplish what on 4th January 1913?
18.
Which player has had the joint shortest England international test career at just 6 minutes, as well as one of the shortest Northampton Saints careers at just 17 minutes?
19.
Which England player, who went on to play for the Saints, has had the shortest test career having started a test?
20.
Which Northampton player, was first player (and, to date, one of just two players) to have been capped for the British and Irish lions in a test match, before being capped for England?
21.
Which is the bigger margin of victory – England’s largest ever win against South Africa or South Africa’s largest ever win against England?
22.
What unwanted record did England avoid setting by beating South Africa at Ellis Park, Johannesburg in June 1972 and again by beating South Africa at Twickenham in Nov 2006?
23.
Which England player is quickest (in terms of number of caps), to reach 100 points for England?
24.
Danie Gerber & Clyde Rathbone are the only two players to have accomplished what feat in England – South Africa international?
25.
Which England player was on the winning side v South Africa in Bloemfontein in 2000, and remained so for a record further 27 successive England matches, spanning 4 years?
26.
What selection sequence of 198 successive England test matches spanning 21 years from 1986, was brought to an end on 26 May 2007 when England took on South Africa in Bloemfontein?
27.
What was unique about Frank Mellish’s international rugby appearances in 1921?
28.
What did England accomplish for the first time in 1969?
29.
Which player scored England’s first ever 5 point try?
30.
What world record was set when England defeated South Africa 22-27 in Bloemfontein on 24 June 2000?

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Bath 14 – 18 Northampton
Bath v Northampton Saints match report by Matt Tyrer for ComeOnYouSaints.com, originally published 15th September 2012
Aviva Premiership Round 3
Friday 14th September 2012 -The Recreation Ground, Bath
KO 7.45
Saints completed the West Country hat trick with victory at the Rec on a very pleasant Friday night in Bath. Just like the previous two games this season, this was not easy and the game yet again went right down to the final whistle with Northampton, for a third week running, clinging on to victory.
No doubt Plan A before kick off in the dressing room would have been for Northampton to use their large forward pack to control possession, Myler to kick to territory, and for the Saints to take the raucous home support completely out of the game and to squeeze the life out of Bath.
68 seconds later and it was time for Plan B.
Although dealing with kick offs is something Northampton have long since given up trying to master, they are normally quite decent at extricating themselves from the subsequent pressure they put themselves into.
It was different this time though, and not different because Northampton dealt with a kick off properly, they didn’t. What was different was the failure to deal with the subsequent pressure.
A Bath line out just outside the Saints 22 was won off the top by Bath’s captain Stuart Hooper, the ball was spun into midfield and taken up by Danny Hipkiss, quickly recycled and out to the excellent Tom Biggs who stabbed a sort of banana grubber kick behind the Saints line for Nick Abendanon (who had timed his run superbly) to gather and touch down unopposed.
It was alarming in its simplicity and the Bath supporters who completely surrounded us in the IPL stand in front of where the try was scored were delighted. It was a rapturous moment for the home support thankfully unpunctuated by any lengthy TMO review. The trail has shown this extended TMO review process really is at its most consistently successful when referees ignore it.
I decided to take action, and stood up from my seated position (I was in the back row, before anyone complains). It was clear to me that my seated position was a direct contributory factor in the try. By making the change to standing, it was going to help turn around the team’s performance.
Then Olly Barkley did something he has not done all season and missed a kick at goal. Immediately my change of viewing position was having the desired effect. The correlation was undeniable.
What this early try and the excellent playing conditions told us, was that we were going to be in for an expansive open running rugby try-fest . This early score was clearly going to be the first of many in the game, so no need for Northampton to panic just yet.
However, what we really needed to make ourselves feel more at home was some scrummaging, and lots of it. So a couple of minutes later Lee Dickson fired the ball at Andrew Small, and it was scrum time. And scrum time usually means penalty time to Northampton time. One reset later and the penalty was duly Northampton’s.
The kick into touch enabled Northampton to do more of their favourite part of the game – the lineout catch, followed by rolling maul, followed by penalty to Saints. We were now into a more comfortable place within the game.
However, at the time I was exasperated by the clearly incorrect decision to kick for goal. This game was going to be a try fest, we needed to go for the corner, three points weren’t going to cut it in this game, and we’d probably miss what was a difficult kick anyway. If only our captain could read the game as well as me.
Anyway, Myler landed the tricky opening kick (always a good sign as Myler’s opening kick usually sets the tone for the rest of the evening), and the Saints were on the board 5-3.
It was now important not to repeat what happened at the start of the game and let Bath back into the game and onto the attack by not dealing with a restart. Then Northampton then failed to deal with the restart, and Bath were back into the game and onto the attack. A penalty for something or the other soon followed and Barkley’s radar was turned back on and the home side’s lead was back to five.
Five minutes later and Northampton were then gifted 3pts after a Bath infringement at the breakdown when Bath were looking very solid and untroubled in defence.
As the game wore on, the try fest wasn’t quite materialising as the game started to meander a bit. Defences were getting on top. Samu Manoa’s big hit on Lee Mears was a highlight moment of a game otherwise beginning to turn into a bit of a grind. Still, as defences tired later in the game, it was clear the game would open up and the tries would come.
The came one of the more bizarre penalties as Andrew Small blew for a reset scrum and Bath just carried on scrummaging. Small blew again as the Northampton pack stood up (opposition supporters would say no change there) and still the Bath eight were attempting to drive through. Then, just as Bath were finally beginning to make headway against a pack that was detached and not even pushing, Andrew Small spoilt their fun by awarding a penalty to Northampton. Were Bath trying to make a ‘statement’, or did they just not hear?
Anyway, one of Northampton’s stranger 3 points this season and suddenly without really causing Bath any real problems, Saints found themselves in front for the first time.
The locals around us were not happy with Small and their mood was not improved after Small penalised Bath for backchat after the referee had called a knock on advantage over just as Claasens was kicking the ball directly into touch. The scapegoat was now established for the rest of the game.
Both sides had spells of pressure in the run into half time, but both sets of defences were looking increasingly stronger and well organised by the minute. The try-fest was clearly not going to materialise now and Northampton would have been grateful to notch over another penalty four minutes from the break.
Then Tom Mercey was replaced by Paul Doran-Jones in one of the more mysterious substitutions of the season. Answers on a postcard please.
There was still time for a Saints let off before half time when Olly Barley hit the upright from straight in front and Saints would have been delighted to find themselves four up at the break .
The Saints kicked off in the second half and applied a spell of pressure in the Bath 22. It was during this spell of pressure that the concerning moment of the game came as Foden twisted his ankle whilst executing a sharp offload (the injury had nothing to do with the hit from Biggs which was entirely legitimate anyway). Foden was in considerable pain and there must be concern that he will be out for a considerable period.
There was slight disappointment that Saints ten minute spell of pressure after half time yielded just 3 points, particularly, against Dylan Hartley’s wishes, the kicking tee came on when the Bath scrum was on the rack close to their own line. Also, Biggs may have been a tad fortunate to escape any penalty for what looked like a deliberate knock on when a try looked more probable than possible, but otherwise Bath’s defence was superb.
That disappointment grew further, when after ten minutes of graft to earn three points, they were given straight back just a minute later after Northampton lost possession and territory after failing to deal with the restart. Then, compounding matters, Paul Doran-Jones was caught offside in front of the sticks when the defensive alignment was fully set and under no real pressure. There was no repeat of Barkley’s hiccup just before half time and the lead was back down to four.
The frustration was briefly interrupted by the pleasing sight of the return to action of Courtney Lawes , but the frustration soon returned following Tonga’uiha’s unforced error in dropping the ball and then Northampton conceding the penalty in front of the sticks from the resultant scrum. The lead was now down to one point heading into the last quarter.
I couldn’t understand it watching in the stands. I was still standing up and hadn’t sat down once, my position unchanged from the 2nd minute, so why was it starting to go wrong? Still now was not the time to lose my nerve, so I remained standing.
The last quarter seemed to go on for an eternity (a bit like this match report) and wasn’t comfortable viewing. Northampton were getting nowhere fast against Bath’s iron curtain defence and Northampton were left to resort to a speculative long range drop goal attempt that fell well wide.
The tension wasn’t eased when Myler missed his first kick of the night following a penalty given away at, believe it or not, the scrum. Then it was Barkley’s turn to miss a kick which would have given Bath the lead. It looked on line all the way, but the connection was not as good as it could have been and it just fell short.
Then with 7 minutes to go, it looked like Northampton’s moment to seal the match when the excellent Manoa charged down Barkeley and gathered the loose ball. Of course, Northampton didn’t seal the match at this point as that would have made the last 5 minutes almost comfortable viewing. Unfortunately, just when you need an absolute flier on Manoa’s shoulder, we didn’t have one and Bath were able to scramble back.
More endeavour on the Bath try line still did not see Northampton breach the Bath defence and in the end they settled for a Tom May drop goal. A four point lead took away penalty/drop goal option to win the game for Bath (something that was to prove crucial), though at the time yours truly would have preferred us to continue to hammer away at the try line which would have wound down the clock even if we were unsuccessful.
Anyway, my concern was to prove unfounded as Northampton comfortably saw out the final minutes to close out the game. Well, reasonably comfortably. Ok, so it was desperate scrambling and clinging on by the fingertips under the shadow of our own posts at the death mixed with some good fortune relating to bad attacking options taken by Bath. And just to add to our nerves, Phil Dowson kicks the ball dead thinking the game is over, when there was still a minute still to go – only with Northampton!
As usual it was excruciating to watch, as usual it was anything but easy, but also as usual (happily so far this season), the outcome was good in the end, even if it was no try fest.
Samu Manoa was a deserved man of the match, what a find he has been. Also a big mention should go to Luther Burrell who looked a very strong ball carrier in the centres and made yards after the hit time and again. Finally, a special mention to myself, for having faith with the persistence with the standing up, which I’m convinced made all the difference in the end. It was a grind, it was ugly, but when you win tough game like this, who needs tries?
Report: Matt Tyrer
Bath
Abendanon; Eastmond, Hipkiss, Williams (Cuthbert, 72), Biggs; Barkley,Claassens; James (Catt, 62), Mears (Batty, 62), Wilson (Perenise, 62), Hooper (capt Attwood, 41)), D Day, Taylor (Ovens, 74), Fearns, Skirving.
Northampton
Foden (May, 46); Pisi, Waldouck, Burrell, Artemyev; Myler, Dickson; Tonga'uiha (Waller, 70), Hartley (capt), Mercey (Doran-Jones, 37), Manoa, C Day (Sorenson, 63), Dowson, Wood, Oakley (Lawes, 57).
Referee: Andrew Small Attendance 10,462
2nd Minute – 5-0 - Try Bath (Abendanon), Missed Conversion (Barkley) 7th Minute – 5-3 – Penalty Northampton (Myler) 10th Minute – 8-3 – Penalty Bath (Barkley) 16th Minute – 8-6 – Penalty Northampton (Myler) 22nd Minute – 8-9 – Penalty Northampton (Myler) 36th Minute – 8-12 – Penalty Northampton (Myler) 40th Minute – 8-12 – Missed Penalty Bath (Barkley) HT Bath 8 – 12 Northampton 50th Minute – 8-15 – Penalty Northampton (Myler) 52nd Minute – 11-15 – Penalty Bath (Barkley) 60th Minute – 14-15 – Penalty Bath (Barkley) 62nd Minute – 14-15 – Missed Drop Goal Northampton (Myler) 65th Minute – 14-15 – Missed Penalty Northampton (Myler) 69th Minute – 14-15 – Missed Penalty Bath (Barkley) 76th Minute – 14-18 – Drop Goal Northampton (May) FT Bath 14-18 Northampton
One pane of glass away from a very messy scene
Currently in Cornwall taking in the natural beauty of the beaches there
Plan B for Dinner
25th December 2013:
McDonalds in Ferndown is closed :(
Bugger

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Why is it when you're shopping for others, all you come across is stuff you want for yourself?
I wonder if there was anyone on the other end of the line, or whether it was just for show?
The woman next to me on the train just answered her phone "Hello sexy". The subsequent conversation is both nauseous and never-ending.