~Bittersweet~

The world slows when your eyes meet.

You feel your heart beat faster, your hands grow warm, and you can’t stop the helpless look that washes over your features. He’s beautiful.

Beautiful in the same way a drying rose might be, carefully set out to preserve the memories it holds. Beautiful in the way that the icy chill of winter can freeze you to the bone yet also makes cozy blanket forts and warms chilly hands through the heat of cocoa. Only a single look and he—

And he looks at you as if you’re insane.

“Are you going to order anything?”

Dumbfounded, you nod and stutter over your words, broken from your reverie.

“Sorry, sorry—a medium chai latte for me, please.”

“Name?”

You tell him your name as you fiddle with your wallet, pulling out the bills needed for payment. As soon as you hand them over, he quickly works the register and hands back the change and receipt.

“Thank you!”

You call out and are returned with a noncommittal noise before the handsome yet rude man brings his attention to the next customer.

The second time you go to the shop, you fumble with your bag. Things aren’t where they should be and the anxiety that fills your stomach gets worse as you realize the man behind the cashier is the same as yesterday.

It really shouldn’t be a surprise considering you’re here at the same time, but you don’t have time to think about that as you finally fish out your wallet to pay.

Embarrassed, you take your drink and leave without a word.

The strange exchanges become a part of your daily schedule now that classes have begun once more. There isn’t a day where you don’t exchange a few awkward words with the barista (you realize weeks later to your embarrassment that his name is Xiao). But you manage.

Then, one day, you walk in with newfound vigor, ready to finally order without a mistake, only to see him slide a hot cup of your usual across the counter.

“That’ll be $4.17.”

You stare at his otherwise neutral expression.

And then a smile spreads across yours. You hand him the money as usual. It’s a shame that you’re still rushing just enough to miss the brush of pink across the tops of his pierced ears.

The next few times you come in before class, you try a few jokes, feeling a bit more confident about your not-really-there relationship with your now favorite (only) barista. He’s….a tough crowd.

“How have you bean?” You lean on the counter while he finishes preparing your drink. He looks at you with a quirked brow and hands you the cup.

“Fine?”

When you laugh at his confused expression, you shake your head and take a sip.

“hOT-!”

Xiao laughs, a light breathy chuckle, and you pause with your injured tongue peeking out.

“I thought that college students were supposed to be smart.”

It’s been a few months now since you first started coming to this coffeeshop. With the change of the seasons, the comfortable chill of autumn gives way to a brisker winter. When you arrive bundled up in two jackets, a scarf, and a hat topped with a brightly colored pompom. Xiao notices the way that your cheeks flush red from the nippy air but covers his concern with the laugh you’ve come to hear so often now.

“Is it that cold out?”

Indignant, you carefully unwrap your scarf and remove your hat.

“Are you going to tell me you go outside in the winter dressed like that?” He looks down at his clothing—his work apron, a plain fitted black tee and similarly black pants.

“Yes.”

“Maybe you need coffee.”

This time you see the way that his eyes crinkle at the corners with mirth and he shakes his head.

“I’m adding it to your tab.”

“No—I was kidding!”

Winter semester comes to an end, and for a few weeks, Xiao realizes how bored he is when you don’t come in every day. For a moment, he wonders if he should’ve asked for your number. No—no, he shouldn’t. But that doesn’t stop him from coming in every day having to toss out a new cup because he already wrote your name on it.

When you return, you come back with a gift for him.