MatadorU

7 signs you’re a tourist in Warsaw

1. You’d never park your car on the sidewalk.

“Now I know why everyone in Chicago parks on the sidewalk!” a college friend once said to me. “Chicago is full of Polish people.”

In Warsaw, it’s very common to park on the sidewalk, especially in the historic parts of the town, where streets are narrow and curb space is limited. In places where sidewalks are nonexistent, drivers will park on the grass turning it into a mud patch.

Drivers trying to park on the sidewalk will often rev up their car engines just enough to put the car over the curb which scares the living daylights out of tourists, and they dash away as fast as they can or stare at it like a confused puppy. Natives just amble past the parking car, though the driver may occasionally yell some obscenities out the window.

2. You buy Absolut.

Nothing against Absolut Vodka, but you’re in the country where the spirit was invented. Try one of the plethora of authentic Polish vodkas: Żubrówka, Pan Tadeusz, Wyborowa, Sobieski, Absolwent, Belvedere, Biała Dama, Chopin, Cracovia, Luksusowa, Monopolowa, Soplica, Polonaise, Wódka Żołądkowa Gorzka, Wisent, Starka, Polmos Łańcut…

There is nothing like coming home during the freezing cold of the Polish winters, and pouring yourself a shot of Żubrówka. You feel the fire coat your throat, eventually reaching your stomach like a wave; the fire will spread through your veins, clearing the cold out of your fingers and toes.

3. You worry about getting attacked by bears.

When I volunteered for the UEFA European Championships in 2012 in Warsaw, a lady told me a tourist once asked her where he could see bears. Apparently, he’d heard they roam everywhere, since there are lots of forests around Warsaw. We do have a couple of bears, mostly living in Praga Park, but they’re nothing to worry about.

Up until relatively recently, the Praga district was considered Warsaw’s “Bermuda Triangle” due to its high crime rates. But, taking Ulica Ratuszowa, a street that turns into cobblestone roads, the buildings turn from grey concrete to brick — the warehouses and pre-war factories are now home to trendy bars and restaurants, frequented by artists and musicians. It is the SoHo of Warsaw.

8 questions solo female travelers are sick of hearing

1. “Why are you alone?”

Sometimes travelling alone is an anomaly. I get that. When I first landed in Athens, I climbed aboard an airport taxi with an older driver whose first question was, “Why are you alone?” He was genuinely perplexed. I could tell by his concern that he couldn’t understand how I’d find such an experience enjoyable. It was Greece — everything centers on family life there, and so the question wasn’t so offensive.

But I get the question all the time, from friends and strangers alike. Travelling alone as a woman shouldn’t be an anomaly. It implies that we are in harm’s way — that what we are doing is risky. Everything is risky. Life is risky. I appreciate the well meaning, but I like travelling solo. So many opportunities arise when you’re open to them.

2. “Aren’t you ever going to settle down?”

This question bothers me because it assumes that “settling down” is the proper way to live. I’m supposed to have a home on Cookie Cutter Lane with five babies and a shiny new Subaru. I should be home on Friday nights making dips and pairing them with cocktails. My parents really, really want grandkids.

No, I will not settle, not for anything. Maybe one day I’ll get married and pop out a child or two, but I will not settle. The role of matriarch and wife is very different for me. It does not involve coupon clipping or Saturday morning soccer coaching. If that’s the life you want and love, that’s awesome. But it’s not for everyone, and it will never be for me. That old American dream? It’s dead. Freedom is my dream.

3. “Don’t you know India [or any country] is dangerous for women?”

I recently posted a message on Facebook about how I was planning on volunteering in Bangalore. Within 30 minutes, I had several people message me to tell me that India treats its women like garbage, and if I go there, I’ll surely end up in a ditch somewhere with my throat slit.

Every country has its problems, but to rule out an entire nation because of a few grisly stories is insane. India has more than a billion people. It’s true that women can have terrible experiences in India, or any other country, but I’ve known more than a handful of women who have travelled such destinations alone, and have never experienced disaster. Bad things can happen anywhere. Generally, people are good.

4. “Aren’t you worried you’ll get attacked?”

Yes, I worry. Every time I have to walk back to my hotel or hostel after sunset, I worry a stranger will snatch me in the alleyway. Every time I get into a taxi alone, I worry the driver will have sinister motives.

But you know what? It’s the exact same fear I have when I’m home in Canada. There has never been an evening when I’ve walked home alone without having my keys out to stab somebody in the eyeball if they make a pass at me. To think that I am just as safe at home is ignorant. Being targeted because I’m a woman is a constant concern, but it’s not going to hold me back. It’s funny how people overlook the issues at home because of what they know from the media.

17 signs you were raised in a Chinese-American family

1. You speak Chinglish fluently.

You and your parents have developed your own, unique language, made up of some parts English and some parts Chinese. Every Chinese-American family has their own version of Chinglish. Some of my family favorites: “I bought hen duo (a lot) of your favorite snacks.” “It’s too mafan (troublesome).” And: “That’s so diu lian (humiliating).” When you were younger you felt embarrassed to speak Chinglish in public, but now that you’re older, you cherish having such an intimate language that you share with only a few other people in the world.

2. You appreciate your Tiger Mom now that you’re older.

For you, the Tiger Mom is neither myth nor satire. Got an A- in your super hard Physics class? Too much TV. Can’t master that piano concerto at the age of eight? Practice more. Not as good as your math whiz cousin who got into MIT at the age of 13? No more video games. Play was considered a four letter word when you were growing up. While this may have made for a stressful childhood, once you were out in the world on your own, you appreciated the discipline your Tiger Mom taught you. But she still hassles you on the phone, no matter how old you are.

3. There’s a collection of really tacky gold jewelry waiting for you once you get married.

Your Chinese parents may be completely Americanized otherwise, but one cultural habit from the old country they can’t let go of is collecting gold jewelry for their daughters’ weddings. We’re not talking tasteful, subtle, delicate pieces. We’re talking blingy, 24K pieces with dragon and flower motifs and big-ass rubies. We’re talking the kind of jewelry that doesn’t go with anything. Except the super uncomfortable red qipao dress with gold embroidery that you’re not looking forward to wearing at your Big Fat Chinese Wedding banquet.

This assignment was all about learning to do quality research. I wrote a short bit on the history of the city. The most interesting part turned out to be an election in the 1860s. The flooding in Sacramento was so bad that Governor Stanford attended his own inauguration in a rowboat and entered his home via a second floor window.   

#MatadorU student @miraecampbell is living the dream right now at #JoffreLakes, #Canada! #Travelstoke!