as you were i was, as i am you will be

Am I reallly so horrible? Am i capable of making someone completely hate themselves and me? Everyone always says I should ask for help but when I do, I’m bitching... But its not recollected how many times I asked nicely or calmly its only remembered the way I asked when I am completely at my breaking point. And so now apparently you are too. I am apparently horrible because I am  unapologetic and not begging for forgiveness... and I cant help but to think you are manipulating me to think I expected too much when I asked for the bare minimum. I don’t think your feelings are invalid but I cant fake my sincerity on the matter because when all is said and done you haven’t done shit to keep this family together. 

so well its been awhile again. i got a place of my own now moving in just over a week. 2020 wasnt the worst for me tbh. got my tongue split, a new car, now my own place in 2021