Beautiful Mess

tw: child neglect, divorce, cheating

place: any open space. I'm imagining here.

Bel didn’t really know why she was still sitting in a park at this time on a sunday. Her tinder date had failed to show up -again, the air was very cold and it was already getting dark. She knew she didn't want to go home yet, but staying there soon wasn't going to be a good option either.

Spread across the table were her art supplies: a set of watercolors, brushes of all sizes and a cup of stained water; having learned from two previous failed tinder dates, she had come prepared this time. Instead of spending hours just sitting alone, waiting, she was going to finish the painting she had started a few days ago.

With a sigh, Maribel finally let down her brush and looked at her finished painting. She smiled at at it, not really noticing the person walking towards her.

Part of being on the board of charity was interviewing volunteers among other things. Usually, for some one as type A as Margaret, she would be excellent at completing such a task with incredible efficiency and attention to detail. Today, however, she found herself having to pull herself out of more pressing thoughts to focus on the task of hiring a a lead volunteer for an upcoming event to raise money for children in need. “So, why don’t you tell me about yourself?”

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“Well I-” Maribel shifted on her seat, clearing her voice. It was the first time she had volunteered for a charity, and even if she was familiar with organizing events, she couldn’t help but feel nervous at the idea of going through an interview, “I’m a graphic designer but I really really love art, I actually went to art classes all my childhood, so once or twice a month, I work with small artists, which I contact via Instagram mostly, and I help them organize their exhibitions in my best friend’s coffeeshop- sometimes galleries are really difficult to book and they don’t tend to work with emerging artists” she explained, shrugging, “anyways, our main goal is to put their art out there and maybe get a few comissions or sell some pieces. I’ve organized almost 30 exhibitions” she finished, worried she had talked to quickly, “also, I’m a virgo” she added with a smile, hoping that curious little fact could help her case. 

“Are you sure you have time for this interview? I can come back later if you prefer...” Bel suggested, noticing how the woman seemed a bit distracted.

open! anywhere!

@enycstarters​

“ is this your dog ? no ? ” benji asks near enough every stranger that passes him, though it’s currently about a fifty percent chance of even getting a reply. he just wants to get home but how can he when he’s pretty sure this dog is lost. or maybe it ran away, or maybe was stolen and then ran away and is now lost. he has no idea. but the thought of leaving it unsettles him, so much so he’s stood talking to random people on the path. he’s only been asking for a couple of minutes but it feels like an eternity already. 

he sees someone else, trying to get their attention. “ excuse me, is this your dog ? ”

Bel had been following the dog for a few blocks now. She had seen it turn a corner not so far away, lost and disoriented, and her heart had ached at the thought of just leaving it alone. Now, from the distance, Maribel stood watching curiously as a man held it and started talking to people that either ignored him or headed him a weird look. Bel then decided that it was time for her to intervene. Maybe together they could find the dog’s owner.

“No, sadly it isn’t” Bel replied, kneeling down to pet the dog, “But I’ve been following it for a while, I didn’t want to scare it so I didn’t try to catch it, but I’m glad you did” she commented, trying to find on the dog either a tag or something that lead them to their owner. She sighed when she couldn’t find anything, “It should be illegal to just have a dog without a tag” she finished as she stood up and looked at the man.

Up close, Bel thought she recognized him. Was he that guy from that TV show? 

Ha! New York never failed to impress her “If you want I can take this little guy back to where I saw him… her? turn the corner” she offered, deciding not to ask any more questions. It wasn’t every day that Maribel came across a celebrity, but when she did, she always tried to not make a fuzz about it. What if someone else recognized him and all hell broke lose? If she was famous, she would probably want to be left alone.

-

“I am so, so sorry. Christ,” in an absolute shock, Dan kept grabbing, and grabbing, and grabbing tons of napkins – definitely not environmentally friendly or exciting for the already annoyed waiter, but it did seem like it could at least save her shirt. Well, a little bit. It was already stained with coffee, and it couldn’t possibly be a good thing. He didn’t even get a chance to take in the fact that it was Bel standing in front of him – someone he hadn’t seen in years, but once was so close and dear to him. “I mean, I decided to come back with a bang, so you’d never forget about me again,” he finally laughed, taking a break from cleaning the floor and stacking wet paper to the growing papier-mâché mountain. 

But Kiwi was another little problem, making the already raised ruckus even more chaotic, so he just simply nodded to Bel, who made him remember how worse the situation could get, and loosely tied his leash to one of the chairs – far enough to keep him away from the sugar, soaking up the floor. “I’m so happy to see you too, but fucking hell… I guess I’ve been better,” he laughed once again and then muttered a silent thank you to the water, who finally came to the rescue and finished cleaning the mess he caused. 

“I’m so sorry, I’ll get you another one, okay? I mean, that’s the least I can do for ruining your clothes,” Dan sighed, stood up and took a proper look at Bel. He wasn’t sure how much time had passed – they were all so young back then, full of ambition and dreams, yet so carefree and… happy. They’ve changed, of course, but what shaped them, and how? There were so many questions he had, so much he wanted to find out. “Do you have time to stay for a bit? Would love to catch up,” he took a look at the table, next to the patiently waiting Kiwi, then back to her, his eyes stopping on a stain on her shirt. “I mean… If you don’t mind… Well, that.”

.

“You know how to make your presence known” she replied, smiling, but still not managing to look at him. Even if Daniel laughing and making jokes made Bel feel a little calmer, she had to admit she had been thinking of ways to escape the situation and avoid the awkward encounter. She could have just faked a smile here, told a lie there, and finish the conversation with a ‘Sure! Let’s hang out sometime’; but he seemed actually glad to see her, and she had always liked his company.

“I- um…” Feeling a sudden burden in her chest, and her heart racing at his question, Bel thought of her answer. Half of her wanted to stay and catch up with Dan, see how he was doing, what was he up to. The other half already felt the burden of all those feelings she had buried deep in her mind, suddenly coming to surface.

But Dan had nothing to do with the end of her relationship, and he had offered to help her even when he didn’t have to; the least she owed him was a coffee and a talk. Bel laughed in order to distract herself, “yeah, I have time” she replied, grabbing her denim jacket and putting it on in a failed attempt to hide the brown stain spreading across her shirt, “but you owe me a shirt! And a new coffee” she joked, and took a few steps towards the table. As she sat down, Bel distractedly leaned to pet Kiwi with the sole purpose of having something to do.

“You know Dan, I didn’t forget about you” she said, frowning, “I miss hanging out with you, it’s just that after everything happened I needed to disappear”, and it was true, Maribel remembered Dan; she remembered him sitting on a stool in her old apartment, talking passionately about his plans for the future. She remembered him at 4 am, sitting on the couch across from her, answering questions about his work, his life, his goals. She remembered finding out about his divorce, and the first time she had looked at him and felt something different. And she remembered the last time they had spoken, how lonely she had felt... but he had been friends with Brandon first, and that was still a very recent wound, even if a year and a half had already passed.

Bel finally straightened up on her chair and, while doing so, she gathered up the courage to finally look at Daniel in the eyes. It was as if no time had passed yet everything was so different. “I’m sorry I haven’t been here for you like you were for me. But I’m actually truly happy you spilled coffee on me and the floor” Bel laughed, “And I want to know everything, where are you working, how are you doing!”

“No, I have no newborn baby near me unless it is fucking hiding.” Rylan broke out into a cackling laugh, glancing around her as if there might be a baby somewhere she hadn’t noticed. “You’re right though, I think a baby is only truly cute in its parents eyes. I looked like an underfed llama when I was born, it was no a pretty sight. Honestly between you and me I only go on about the painting my parents have as much as i do because it pisses my mom off. Which is hilarious in itself.” She noticed how sweet the smile was she was offered and how it reached the other’s eyes in the most genuine way. It was a nice change to how fake so many people were in this city. Or maybe that was just the ones she was forced to hang around with by said parents, who knows.

“One black coffee coming right up! I’m not going to force lactose on you because…well I can’t deal with the fallout. It sounds too icky.” Shooting her a cheeky smile before scampering off towards the counter so she could place both their orders. Tapping on the counter as she waited for them to be read the girl glanced back over at her new friend. Yes, friend, because she’d decided she was keeping her. Bel seemed so lovely it was hard not to warm to her.

“Alrighty, one black coffee for you, and one frap that is more cream than coffee for me, so we’re all living our best lives.” Sitting back down, this time at the same table as the other woman instead of her own, she leant across it eagerly. “So, I should probably give you context as to why the fuck I’m accosting you in the middle of a coffee shop, right?”

.

Bel laughed with Rylan; she understood how it felt wanting to piss her mother off. She too had a… complicated? relationship with her mom. Not long ago, Bel had gone all the way back to Mexico to visit her maternal family after almost twenty years of not seeing each other, and of course, just minutes after arriving to the airport, the first thing her mother had done, even before reaching out to hug her, was commenting on her body. ‘Mari, estás muy flaca’, she had said. ‘You are too skinny’. 

Those words had shut down all the excitement the girl was feeling by being back at her hometown, “Mothers” Bel replied, sighing while she looked at Ry with empathy. She recalled that, after that single remark, she had questioned every decision, every comment, and every word that came out of her; Bel constantly wondered if her mother would approve of her clothes, if her grandmother approved of her lifestyle; she wondered what would her grandfather say about her not being married (at 31!), about how she still lived with her father; what did her aunt and cousins think about her skipping college, about the fact that she lived with her ex-boyfriend for five years and then broke up with him… Maribel shook those thoughts out of her head as she came back to the conversation, “But hey, I’ll keep your secret. And if I ever meet your parents I’ll make sure to casually comment how that famous painter is overrated” she finished with a wink.

“Thanks! To living out best life” Bel said, quickly taking the cup to her lips. It burned a little but she didn’t mind. Coffee was one of the few things that brought her good memories from Mexico and that she still really enjoyed, “Hm, so it wasn’t only because I seem like a super interesting and pretty person?” Bel joked, hoping not to sound too annoying, “But really, I’m intrigued. Please tell me how can I help you and I what’s your zodiac sign. That second one is really important”.

Letting out a loud snort of laughter at the cutting comment regarding art on the Upper East Side Rylan grinned, enjoying Bel’s company already. Her sense of humour was certainly up the same ally as her own. “I bet, i mean some of the most famous paintings in the world look like figure painting so I bet the Upper East SIde is no different. My parents have this one in their living room that cost like a bomb, it’s by some really famous painter, and i swear he must have done it with his eyes closed.” She laughed again, shaking her head. “Funnily enough they don’t find it amusing when I point that out.” It was one of her favourite ways to wind her mother up in particular who seemed to hold extra fondness for the odd piece.

“You don’t have to do that! Here, let me get you one as a thank you for listening to me ramble on about what I’m looking for, ‘cos i promise you you’re going to be bored of it in about three and a half seconds. What do you want?” Rylan had already jumped up with the intention of placing the order so that Bel couldn’t argue with her on the matter. “I was going up to get myself a second one anyway so…” An enthusiastic grin thrown in her direction.

.

“Well, maybe people need to just chill out. To be honest, sometimes I can’t keep my opinions quiet either. It’s like… you know when someone asks you if their newborn baby is pretty?” Bel laughed, shrugging “If you ask me, no newborn baby is ever pretty, I know I wasn’t pretty, I know my kids won’t be pretty. Of course I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings, artists take criticism very seriously, I just don’t know why everyone keeps lying” she stated, and then quickly added, “I’m sorry if you have a newborn baby near you though” a sweet smile appearing on her face.

Bel thought of her answer for a second, “Just black coffee please, my body can’t handle lactose anymore, and I’m not ready to try any other type of milk yet”. Bel made a mental note to thank Ry later by maybe buying her a snack or dessert.

As Rylan went to ask for the coffee, Bel opened all the documents she needed. A brief format, her mock up for color palettes, previous pieces she had worked on… everything she needed to understand Ry’s ideas so, by the time she came back, they could start talking business.

Still, Bel thought that, even if they didn’t talk business that day, she wouldn’t mind. Rylan seemed like a great person to be around.

location: Brooklyn streets

It had been a rough, very busy day for Bel. She had woken up really early in the morning, grabbed a cup of coffe and some toast, and had gone straight to her laptop to finally finish a comission she had promised would be delivered by that day. She spent all day picking colors, drwaing shapes and doing some tests, so finally, by five o’clock, her work had been finished and the design had been sent. She only needed to wait for feedback or changes.  

Standing up from her chair, she stretched out and shook her arms. As much as she thought she had gotten used to working on her computer, she could feel her eyes burning a little and her hand starting to cramp; maybe, Maribel thought, a nice cup of coffee could help her feel better. 

Only five minutes later, Bel found herself making her way down of her building, her hand reaching out for the cigarrette and lighter she always hid in her purse.

When she opened the door to the street however, she noticed someone blocking the way, “Excuse me” Maribel said, and waited a few seconds. When she realized the man hadn’t heard her, she cleared her throat and repeated, “Uhm... excuse me?”, the girl took a step to tap him on the shoulder “Hi, do you need help?” 

Where: Some diner in Lower Manhattan With: @maribelnunez​

He couldn’t remember when was the last time he wandered around these streets, but nothing seemed to be changed. Everything looked the same, and every corner had its stories that were waking up some memories — which, by the way, were buried deep inside his subconsciousness. And not all of them were pleasing his heart. In fact, most of them were making him tired. Exhausted.  He ended up there on complete accident, when Dan was on one of his evening walks with Kiwi. In a way, it was pleasurable to remember his younger days, sure. Days when he would spend time here after lectures with his friends. But that life… It seemed so far behind. Daniel sighed. He needed caffeine. So he entered a diner – the one that most days he’d visit after med school. “Black coffee, please,” he muttered as he was greeted by a waiter. He hasn’t even reached his table when he made his order, and it was one of three things that made the diner’s employee annoyed. The second was the dog, walking next to him, even though they did allow pets inside. And, last but not least, the third was bumping into someone standing in front of Daniel, and the fact that this person spilled their drink on the floor. It took only one glance, however, to recognise who it was. “Shit… Shit! I’m so sorry, Bel. Are you okay?”

.

Bel’s day had started just perfect. At 7 am, she had been woken up by the annoying sound of new neighbors moving into her building; at 7:15 am, she had been forced to take a cold -feezing- shower since, apparently, her father had forgotten to pay the bills and evertyhing was now cut until further notice; since she had just came back from her trip to Mexico the day before, there was no food in her appartment, so of course she hadn’t been able to eat breakfast, and now, to top it all off, half of her coffee was spilled on the ground while the other half seemed to have landed on the only clean shirt she had left. 

The worst part? She recognized the voice talking to her. Bel felt her face turn red, her heart rushing inside her, “Dan I-” she struggled to find words, memories quickly appearing back in her mind, “Good thing I asked for iced coffee instead of hot coffee” the girl muttered as she reached for some napkins and started to clean her shirt as if that could also clear everything she was feeling . She deliberately ignored his question though, “It’s been years and this is how you decide to say hello?” the girl joked, kneeling down to start cleaning the rest of the coffee, even when she knew that that should probably be done by a worker and not her. 

Was she fine? Well, she had been fine before coming across one of his exe’s friends, specially that friend whom she’d had a crush on many years ago. Both Brandon and Daniel had been so far away from her mind for at least a year, and now, suddenly, Daniel was all over. 

Bel couldn’t even bring herself to look him in the eye, so she just kept awkwardly cleaning the floor with wet napkins while trying to keep his dog away from the liquid, “So uhm...yeah, your dog shouldn’t be near this. Too much processed sugar” she said while laughing nervously, “But hey I’m happy to see you... how have you been?” 

location: NYC streets, outside of a yoga studio

The plane ticket had appeared a day after Christmas on her desk  A surprise trip form NYC to Mexico City and back, just in time for New Year’s Eve. A bit hesitant, Maribel had stepped on the plane, hoping to be making the correct decision. After all, it had been almost twenty years since the last time she had seen her mother and all her family, so what could go wrong? 

Now, back in the City, Bel was still trying to process everything that had happened back in Mexico. Everything she was still feeling. And for now, doing yoga seemed to be helping her just fine.

As she stepped outside the studio and felt cold air hit her face, Bel laughed at herself; she had only missed two classes and it seemed like all her progress had disappeared. She had stuggled to do the simplest of poses. 

Making her way down the street, Bel checked her watch. It was only a few minutes after eleven, she still had time to grab a cup of coffee before it got late for Mark’s newest exhibition (a local artist she had found via Instagram). She reached out to her back pocket for her phone... and her heart skipped a beat. “Now where did I leave that damn phone...” Bel muttered to herself, quickly searching for the phone inside her bag, in her other pockets, on the sidewalk around her. Desperation filled her as tried to remember when was the last time she had seen it; then she realized that, for now, the smartest idea was to go back to look for her phone on the studio. 

Lost in her thoughts, she didn’t notice the woman walking behind her and couldn’t prevent herself from crashing into her, “I’m so so sorry!” Bel quickly said, “My bad, I’m just in a rush. Sorry”

starter: open to everyone. location: a café, wherever floats your boat because i clearly have no ideas.

Callan Fitzgerald hates nothing more than he hates emails. Emails are part of being a lawyer, but that doesn’t make him hate them any less. Being good at his job, and popular, meant his inbox was constantly flooded – which wasn’t an exaggeration in the slightest. He had a decent amount of spam emails, but everything else… those were emails he had to reply to. That’s his punishment for being good at defending people. Never-ending work. Even when he wasn’t in the courtroom, he was still working – mostly on his laptop, yet still working, regardless. He likes to move his work away from his apartment as much as he could get away with it. He didn’t want to get antsy staying at home all day when he wasn’t in court. So he took his work and his laptop to a local café, so he could at least have a good cup of coffee while hammering down on the emails. He sipped at his coffee, and made sure to keep the cup far away enough on the table so that it didn’t pose a risk to his expensive laptop. Whilst doing so, someone approaches him, and asks if they can take the seat opposite of him at the table. “Yeah, sure.” He replies, returning to his work, not paying them any mind.

.

"Thank you” Bel replied, carefully placing her recently bought cup of coffee on the table and dragging the chair out so she could sit down. Leting out an exhausted sigh, she struggled a bit as she reached out for her suitcase and bag and placed them next to her chair where they couldn’t be neither stolen nor run over by some stranger. She knew going for a coffee just after having arrived at New York from her trip, carrying her suitcase, bag and other stuff, wasn’t the smartest idea, but she really needed some caffeine. She deserved it.

As she reached out to take her ipad out, her elbow hit the side of the table, pushing it in a way that made her coffee and the cup the man had placed far from his computer almost trip over. Luckily, Bel managed to catch everything it just in time before the liquid spilled all over the table and on his things, “Shit I’m so sorry- I don’t know where my head is” she apologized, “I’ll be out of here in just a second, I just need to answer some emails and this place is crowded. Like, how come everyone decided to buy coffe today!”  

location: Santa’s Village on 51st 

Cold air hit Bel’s face as she made her way through the crowd of people. Everyone seemed to be visiting the village that exact day and Bel cursed her luck, wondering why did the only art store that had fer favorite brand of watercolors have to be near the most crowded place in New York. Feeling a bit tired from walking, Bel decided to sit down in one of the benches specifically placed so famillies could rest and take pictures of the pretty lights and decorations. To her right, a long line of children and parents were waiting to greet a Santa Claus, a very cute Santa Claus, Bel thought, ignoring the fact that it was almost freezing. 

After a few minutes of checking her phone, Bel stood up again and headed one last look at the scene. Children were still lining up despite the hour, and Bel shook her head laughing; she thought that, as much as she loved children, she probably couldn’t handle more than an hour doing that job. Maribel looked at the poor Santa still sitting on his chair... and then she had to look again, blinking. “Is that Jesse?” she muttered to herself, walking towards the crowd of people and snapping a picture of him. Then she quickly scattered through her contacts until she found their conversation and sent the picture.

‘Hi Mr. Art Curator. Is that you?’ she typed, feeling embarrased that she had thought he was cute. She shook the thought and then continued typing, knowing Jesse couldn’t possibly answer at the moment ‘I’ll be running some errands close, if you want to take a rest from your important duties, I’ll be working at the coffeeshop next to the art store. I’ll text you the location’, and she sent it.

Two hours later, Bel was sitting down inside the coffeeshop, her watercolors spread across the table, a cup of coffe on her left and a glass of water, tinted with color, on her right. Who could blame her for wanting to try her new watercolors out?