baby girl

NAME: Margot Moore

NICKNAME(S): Mar

AGE: Thirty-three

BIRTHDAY: TBD.

GENDER IDENTIFICATION: Cis Woman (she/her)

SEXUAL ORIENTATION: Bi-curious

RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Single

RESIDENTIAL AREA:

OCCUPATION: Only Fans Model / Sex Worker

POSITIVE TRAITS: talented, strong, loyal

NEGATIVE TRAITS: closed off, stubborn, lost

PLACE OF BIRTH: Vancouver

Wilder: I'm at my dad's dispensary checking on a few things. I can text, though.

Wilder: What's up?

Margot: Oh, um, okay.

Margot: Do you know if you'll be done soon?

Margot: It's fine if not.

Margot: I'm just ..

Margot: I'm a little drunk and a little..

Margot: I don't know if I can be alone right now. And I thought about texting you.

Margot: Nevermind. It's fine.

What was supposed to be a quick trip to the bar to grab him and Isla more drinks, had actually turned into more than Bram could’ve ever (and should’ve ever) bargained for. But given the entourage of nosy dictators in his life pushing him towards his breaking point and over the edge, Bram had welcomed Margot’s drunkenly, sloppy greeting with a matching one of his own. “Yeah, okay. Hold that thought –” Bram was speaking to the bartender not Margot as he allowed the latter to whisk him away from prying eyes and into the privacy of Sully’s unisex stall. One heavy make out session, some groping and a mind-numbing blowjob later and Bram reappeared behind Margot to join the land of the living once again, in the crowded bar of Sully’s.

He fully intended to get back to Isla, who he hadn’t noticed had blown up his phone, when a tall familiar figure blocked his and Margot’s path. There was no telling how much Matt had seen ( or heard ) but judging by the look on his best friend’s face, he’d deduced enough. That, and when you consider Margot’s horrible poker face, what’s transpired in recent weeks had been made crystal clear to the man whose name inspired this very bar. Would Bram openly admit his hatefucking of Margot began back in September and tonight, after being dragged by countless loved ones as of late, he fell victim to her seduction once more? No.

However, if Matt asked, he’d be completely honest. Though, he suspected his friend wouldn’t want a catalogue of the event. But more so, answers otherwise surrounding it. “Listen, Matt—” because Margot was being no help at all and externally cursing and freaking out, Bram took it upon himself to speak up for both of them, lest this confrontation become more awkward than it needs to be. “This isn’t….” he gestured between himself and Margot, “we’re definitely not…. I don’t think we really need to talk about it.”  @mattsullivan​

─────── · ·

It had been awhile since Matt had seen or spoken to Margot aside from a brief text exchange. They were in a weird place. One that didn’t seem like it would resolve anytime soon, mostly because the distance hurt. Somehow and somewhere along the line, for the first time since they were kids, they were no longer a cohesive unit. 

To say that he was a bit surprised she actually came to Sully’s Samhain Festival would’ve been an understatement. Especially since they kept their distance. What had shocked Matt further was the moment she’d caught his eye, Margot was running up to Bram in a way that was far from the behavior he’d known of his two closest friends that had up until that moment, by his understanding, hated each other.

Not only did Margot kiss Bram in a very heated way, she also drug him off to Sully’s bathroom. Matt stood there, by the bar, not sure of what he had witnessed.

The image had seared into his mind. 

Bram had been on a downward spiral himself and felt so far removed from him that he wasn’t even sure the man considered him a friend anymore. 

Not only had he been worried about each friend, and quite a bit, realizing that there was something going on between them showed him that they were only dousing the fires with gasoline. 

Even though Matt had been aware that Lola wouldn’t be attending tonight, he still glanced around the tavern in hopes that she hadn’t seen what he had. That was the other issue in all of this. Lola was a close friend of his and he knew how much this would hurt her. He wasn’t sure what it was, maybe the glance across the room to see Isla staring off in the direction he had just been, but his feet carried him in the direction his two friends had escaped to.

Before he could reach, they came stumbling out of the bathroom and Matt froze in his path, staring at the obvious. 

Matt’s eyes moved from Margot to Bram, back and forth, back and forth, just trying to compute and process. He could tell they both understood they’d been caught in their dirty deed but at least Margot had the sense to not really say anything. 

Finally his gaze rested on Bram and Matt slowly nodded. “Yeah, we’re not gonna talk about it. Because I’m not gonna have you both look me in my eyes and lie to me.”

A deep, long breath was pulled into his lungs before Matt’s gaze switched to @margotmoore​. “If you guys want to run your lives into the ground and hurt everyone around you, fine. But you’re going to leave.”

“Don’t make me throw you out. Just get your shit and leave.”

-

As Bram began to speak, she lifted an elbow digging it into his side. She found it hard to even process the words coming from his lips, not entirely sure what he was saying. It didn’t sound like much of anything. Margot simply didn’t trust him to defuse the situation.

Her brows furrowed at Matt’s implication of lying. Margot knew this would be weird for people, but as the scene began to unfold, for the first time since she started hooking up with Bram she fully started to understand the consequences. Keeping it all a secret, for her, was mostly about her own embarrassment. “It’s not a big deal.” She insisted. She believed. Her eyes turned back to Bram, hoping for some sort of agreement there. How did this effect anyone else, that much?

Matt’s word intensified. She suddenly felt aware of how people looked over their shoulders to see what was going on. Her stomach twisted, feeling like an animal in the zoo on display. Margot tried to convince herself she’d heard him wrong. But you’re going to leave. Her eyes blinked blankly, still struggling to process it all in the moment. This place had always been home to her, before anywhere else felt like home. “Matt..” His name sounded like a plea as it left her mouth.

There were so many things she wanted to say, but the audience seemed to be growing. A numbness settled into her body, saving her further humiliation from this public shaming. Wet eyes were the only sign of weakness. She knew if she cracked, it wouldn’t be a small leak, but the entire waterfall. “I’ll go.” Standing there started to feel like torture. Margot’s eyes dropped to the ground as she maneuvered through the crowd to get to the door, unsure if @bramwalsh​ would follow suit.

for: @margotmoore​​​ when: halloween event where: the seance

“Please tell me you didn’t just sign me up for something that could ruin my life.” It’s a light-hearted joke as Dec finally meets up with Margot, hands shoved in his pockets to keep warm. “I keep getting a seance and a… fortune teller reading mixed up. One doesn’t involve ghosts, though, so I can’t figure out which I’d be less nervous about.”

-

“Oh come on, Dec. You scared?” Margot teased walking along side him. Her steps larger than normal to keep up with his lanky strides. In all honesty, she was mostly a skeptic when it came to this stuff. Margot believed ghost could be real, but the whole conjuring them part is where they lost her. “I highly doubt this won’t be some fabricated charade. You really think the spirits want to be part of this bullshit?”

about margot : 004

                                                halloween - van city event

where : sully’s

She was drunk. Ever hear of a pre-game? Margot knew she was bound to run into an awkward interaction at some point during this evening based on her behavior as of late. There was becoming a list of people she’d rather avoid. Be numbingly drunk for any of it felt like the safer option. Besides, it was a Halloween Event at a bar - the point was to be drunk.

What she couldn’t admit to herself was that despite her apology to Matt, she knew things were still unfixed and weird between them. Margot had been conveniently planning to see him in the largest group of people possible. She wasn’t ready to discuss it. She wasn’t ready to admit to herself she might have been losing the biggest fixture and support in her life. The ache eating at her stomach for months now felt intolerable. The alcohol helped.

Margot spotted Bram as she entered the bar. Her eyes glanced down at her phone, checking the time. Matt said he wouldn’t be here for at least another hour. Her short legs crossed the floor in determined strides. She walked right up to Bram Walsh, pulling him to her as she kissed him deeply in the back corner of the bar. Her lips pulled away from his, kissing a trail up to his ear. “Bathroom.” She whispered. Margot wasn’t proud of the fact that she lost count of how many times they’d hooked up since the first time. Bram, clear by lingering bruises and the rate in which he consumed drugs, had his own shit going on. Without speaking about it, they both seemed to have an understanding of the mutual destruction and the lack of guilt either should carry in the part they played. It wasn’t her fault the sex was really fucking good and that she needed some kind of relief in this moment. It felt good and awful in the ways that distracted her from her actual issues. The mixture of impulse, alcohol, and self-sabotage seemed to all crash down on her at once, making her think that it was okay to hook up with Bram Walsh in the bathroom of Sully’s.

- 10 minutes later -

.“Don’t say I’ve never done anything nice for you.” Margot stood from her knees in the bathroom. She was in the business of pleasing men. The tiny girl fixed her lipstick enough, before patting the man on the chest as she turned to head out of the bathroom. “We’re not doing that again.” She said that every time.

A bit wobbly, from kneeling on tile and her intoxicated state, she opened the door, with the man following close behind. If she wasn’t so sure Matt wouldn’t be there for quite a bit longer, she might have made Bram wait in the bathroom a couple more minutes before reappearing in the bar. Clearly, neither of them were in a sane state of mind. She swatted Bram’s lingering hand away shooting him a look before her eyes turned back ahead. Dark hues landed directly on the one person who wasn’t suppose to be here. Matt evidently just watched her leave the bathroom of his bar with his other best friend, a man she’d detested. “Fuck.”

She saw it on his face. All of a sudden she was sober as day. She could see her entire world coming crashing down in Matt Sullivan’s eyes. Margot glanced up at Bram, before back at her best friend. “Fuck.”

bram: if you say so

bram: what are u doing for halloween?

margot: i guess i will just burn them

margot: probably going to the thing at sully's at some point.

.

He was actually still breathing a little hard when she apologized, for what he didn’t know, and climbed into his lap.  He wasn’t exactly sure what he’d been expecting as he went off, but that probably wasn’t it.  As he adjusted both his expectations and also his arms to accommodate what had just happened, he wondered idly if maybe tequila needed to go on a short list of ‘only drink when….’ 

But once he caught the distantly, ever so familiar scent of her, he thought it didn’t really matter.  He didn’t exactly hate the position he’d ended up in, even if there had been no shot in hell at anticipating where he’d end up as he left to meet his biological father. 

“You don’t owe me any apologies,” he promised, turning his face toward her, just a little, the scruff on his cheek catching a little in his hair and forcing him to make a small adjustment.  He finally caught his breath on a tired sigh, a little drained and glad she also devolved to a single word and more of a feeling.  

Settled. 

If he had to attach words to it, like he told her he didn’t do often, that would’ve been what he used.  His mind was still racing, through all the things he’d laid out before she curled into his lap, but it was no longer so overwhelming it was leaking out of his mouth.  Speaking it had released just enough of the pressure valve he could manage it now, could keep it on the inside.

He didn’t need to run, at least not right now. 

“I’m not going anywhere.”    

-

Margot just sat, letting a silence fill between them. The silence wasn’t knew for her, but it was usually filled with a different kind of activity. This kind of touch felt far less draining, but in some ways a bit more intimate. It was almost funny how she found being held more intimate than sex itself. Margot didn’t let the thought linger too long, for she didn’t want to decide what that said or how it made her feel.

Her eyes glanced up at him briefly, letting them study the differences in his face created by the years - his beard and a few more lines. She let her heavy lids flutter closed, finding the soft hum of his own breath soothe her.

This was all she needed for now. Just this to be still and not alone.

sofia: no apology or excuse needed. life happens

sofia: you ok though?

sofia: she's not my gf... yet. we've only been... dating. but it's been really great and a breath of fresh air

sofia: he's having a hard time and has been closer to me than usual lately. gonna take him out trick or treating, you wanna join us?

margot: im fine

margot: im still gonna call her your gf.

margot: you deserve that

margot: i would normally ask how the sex is.. but you know

bram: idk what ur talking ab.

bram: u sure they're mine?

margot: i am

margot: maybe 80 percent sure

talk to myself - nessa barett

I wish you could hurt me / So maybe when I bleed / I could blame somebody else / But she's sick and she's twisted / A bit masochistic / There's no point in calling for help

margot : sorry i've been mia

margot : im not even gonna make up an excuse

margot : how's the hot gf?

margot : i don't understand how you forget your underwear every time?

─────── · ·

Bewildered, Matt pushed up slowly from the couch. He couldn’t wrap his head around how things had gotten to where they were between them in that very moment. They used to be able to talk— about anything and everything. She was his platonic soulmate, his other half. There was never a way to exist without Margot. His best friend. 

Yet, everything he said was taken negatively. Margot bit at him like she was fending off an attack. And she should know better than anyone that he simply wasn’t like that.

For years he’d been feeling her slowly slip away. Stripping had been one thing, then she began with OnlyFans and suddenly became secretive and acted with shame in regards to the chosen profession. Matt never asked because it was a little awkward and he wasn’t even sure where that came from. Perhaps it was the old fashioned way of thinking he had where sex was between two people and private.

Then again they’d never shied away from talking about it before.

Margot hadn’t wanted her parents or friends to know. Even went by a fake name so that she could conceal her identity. At least, that was the little bits he’d been told.

Swiping his keys from the table, Matt’s sad and bleary eyes looked at his best friend for a long moment. He’d never seen her like this. This was a first— essentially being asked to leave. And all because she took offense to his curiosity. He worked his jaw for a moment before heading for her door. Once there, Matt stopped and looked back at her, he didn’t know how to navigate this.

It’d been happening for a while now; that feeling he was losing all of those closest to him. They all seemed to be slipping through his fingers and were so distant from him. It was like they were all going in different directions.

It hurt.

Over and over again in his life people left him.

Margot had stayed the longest and now it seemed he was losing her too.

“I love you, Margot,” he said from the door, “you’ve been my best friend since we were babies. I ask you questions because I care, I want to know how you’re feeling and what you’re thinking. I also ask because you stopped talking to me a while ago.”

The door was opened then and Matt let out a sigh. “We used to tell each other everything and maybe that’s not something that grows into adulthood but— I feel like I don’t really know who you are anymore.”

Do you?

“You know where to find me if you need me.” It was a shitty way to end things before leaving but leaving hadn’t exactly been his choice, and truthfully, Matt was at a loss of what to do. Walking away from her door was painful and what was maybe worse was how alone he felt. 

-

Margot watched him peel himself from her couch. She couldn’t ignore the fact that she saw the pain in his eyes. Her heart felt like it was swimming in her stomach, pulling her lungs down with it. She brought her feet up onto the couch, eyes finding anything but his figure making his way to the front door. Her arms hugged her legs to her chest, fighting for some sense of comfort. Margot could feel his eyes piercing through her. But maybe for the first time in her entire life, she didn’t know what he was thinking.

His voice caused her to look over to the door. She hoped with the distance and the low lighting he couldn’t see how her eyes welled.

I also ask because you stopped talking to me a while ago. Margot couldn’t pin point the instance where everything that felt like freedom to her started to feel like a hand on her throat. It most likely happened over time, so slow she didn’t even notice it. Waking up felt hard, reading messages for work caused her stomach to twist, seeing people she loved felt like a task - so she chased things that while fleeting made her feel somewhat good. Margot hadn’t be ready to take a look at her life to find what needed to change yet. It was hard enough to get through the day.

Margot was sure if she said anything at the moment, she’d only make it worse. She’d end up saying something mean and jagged to protect her already wilting ego. Instead she watched him leave, and once she was sure he was gone stood up to pour herself a drink from her bar cart.