Planetary Geologist

i would rather see the information for an event handwritten in sharpie on a paper towel than see another AI generated flyer

[looking at people younger than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at people older than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at myself] its over

(nods sagely) (nods basily) (nods rosemarily) (nods saltly) (nods star anisely)

girl nothing is ever gonna be all the way together just enjoy the bits and pieces #yourfragments

Bear religion probably fucking rocks. You're a fucking bear, you're the deadliest thing on earth, once a year an endless supply of salmon just flings itself up the river to gorge on and then you nap for 3 months.

The most delicious food in the world is protected by tiny demons who can defend it from everyone except you. Your natural armor is thick enough that you can just eat the damn hive while they buzz around you. God's chosen animals right there

love the idea of bears being the chosen species actually. having a near death experience and glimpsing heaven and realising it's just full of bears, no humans at all, humans not ensouled actually, humans an accidental byproduct of God's plan for bears

i bet it feels good as fuck to intend to do something and then actually do it

finding a new doctor. applying for jobs. searching for apartments. messaging used car dealers. getting your health insurance to do their job. getting a pharmacy to do their job. getting the dmv to accept the documents they told you to bring. just listing things they probably make you do in hell

In 2026, the chicest thing a gay actor can do is never explicitly come out as gay but also make it abundantly clear that he is. Coming out is too modern. Staying closeted is too old fashioned. But this method merges contemporary freedom with Old Hollywood glamour and allure, and it weeds out the dumbest people who truly don’t get it. I call it the Pascal Method.

Taylor Swift does this

no she doesn’t

You clearly don't go here or to queer history and signaling, or both, enough to have this conversation and I'm not going to explain it to you. You could have asked questions, you could have done even a modicum of research. You didn't and you made yourself look ignorant. Goodbye.

#I'm fucking crying#this is an instant classic#this is the next meme#i can't believe I'm here to see a baby copypasta nary two hours old#I can't#lol#i laughed way too hard#iconic

For the love of God, sound on.

@vensre

Sometimes “Sound on” is a disappointment. This is not one of those times

transcript: [in thick New England accent] “Holy fucking shit; MA! MA, COME OUTSIDE, THERE’S A FUCKING MOOSE! OR A BUFFALO OR SOME SHIT; THEY’RE FIGHTIN’! Where the fuck are you goin’?! MA!! Hoooly shit; this is some fuckin’ National Geographic shit. MA, CALL THE FUCKIN’ COPS OR THE ASPCA; THERE’S ANIMALS FIGHTIN’ IN THE FRONT LAWN!! OOOOOH SHIT!!”

For the love of God, sound on.

@vensre

Sometimes “Sound on” is a disappointment. This is not one of those times

transcript: [in thick New England accent] “Holy fucking shit; MA! MA, COME OUTSIDE, THERE’S A FUCKING MOOSE! OR A BUFFALO OR SOME SHIT; THEY’RE FIGHTIN’! Where the fuck are you goin’?! MA!! Hoooly shit; this is some fuckin’ National Geographic shit. MA, CALL THE FUCKIN’ COPS OR THE ASPCA; THERE’S ANIMALS FIGHTIN’ IN THE FRONT LAWN!! OOOOOH SHIT!!”