Sweethearts and Sinners

Would this ever improve? How could it? It was horrible. The situation was horrible, horrendous, traumatic, and the trauma had...rattled its way through this world, this little dimension, for years. How many years? Not like they could know. How would they tell?

...How would she tell the passing years...Emma had aged, but...

Her stomach knotted again, and she shoved the thought away.

"...Renee. She was the one who...who kind of started me on investigating Emma. You don't...have to see me if it's hard."

"Erin, I'm sorry. But I don't think you're getting it. It's not hard for me to be around you, I need to be around you. It's hard to be alone. I'm sorry I did anything to make you think we needed space, but we don't. I'll- I'll talk to Renee about what I remember when I can. I promise I'll even try to talk to Schutz--" Somehow Begleiter was the biggest maybe of the three, despite him having shown the least malicious intent previously-- "But right now, I just- I need you."

Halfway through his panicked ramble, he summoned a piece of cake on a plate and a glass of wine. ... It was more tempting than ever, but he dismissed them promptly.

Just Jemand, and he...

It was in some ways good. She'd had time, time to get to grips with her abilities in an intentional sense. She'd made practices for herself, writing stories and songs and deliberately not creating anything but the pieces themselves. Picturing images in her head and not manifesting them. It helped. In some ways...it helped.

There was a bit of panic and guilt that he had not been there to help, and really that he had spent any of this time away from her at all, but... it was good that he let her do this herself, too, right? He was more than just his powers.

Eventually he was going to need to talk to someone that wasn't Erin about this...

But he also felt he didn't have many options. Not right now.

And as much as he wanted to talk about Emma and everything he was just now learning about her, he also didn't want to burden poor Erin with it when she got saddled with all the trauma everyone else was supposed to be holding first.

It would be nice to just... spend time together again, and remember even with how awful he felt right now, he still was not alone. And she wasn't either.

It was sort of a miracle she'd been sleeping. Did she actually need sleep or did she just think she needed it, so she did? Like eating. Could she forget?

These questions made her stomach ache terribly, and so she sort of tried to avoid them.

But she had her cell. They all had cells now, and yet she almost never received calls. This was another thing she tried very hard not to think about.

"I thought...I mean. I thought you wanted...space." She was fairly certain they all wanted space, space away from her, she who'd upended the status quo so very thoroughly. Made things...better? Worse? Equally but differently awful? Who was to say? Had Schutz spoken to him yet? Or Begleiter?

"I'm not busy. What's going on, love?"

Plus, well, he did still find the "new" him kind of creepy.

Schutz didn't speak to him, and Jemand could probably list about a hundred reasons why just off the top of his head, but it did make him wonder how he was coping.

"I thought I could handle this by myself, I always handle things alone. I don't like... people seeing me sad. But I don't think I can do this on my own, Erin. ... And I miss you, I've missed having you here for a while, I-I just don't want to bother you because you have powers now and I know what a hassle those can be, a-and-- um--"

Realizing he was getting choked up, he cleared his throat to manage his voice.

“i don't think you realize how much people notice you.”

“you don't seem particularly trusting. then again, maybe neither am i.”

“you have a habit of appearing at interesting moments.”

“you strike me as someone who trusts their gut. am i wrong?”

“i've noticed you always leave before everyone else.”

“i think you enjoy keeping people guessing.”

“you seem restless.”

“it's strange how you can be surrounded by people and still feel alone.”

“have i ever told you that you're difficult to read?”

“you look like you haven't slept.”

“you know this place well enough that i'm starting to wonder if you've always lived here.”

“do you ever worry about the kind of person you're becoming?”

“i've known a lot of people. none of them were quite like you.”

“i can't decide whether people truly change, or if they just become better at hiding parts of themselves.”

“i had the strangest dream last night. do you remember yours when you wake up?”

“the more i get to know you, the more i keep noticing little similarities between the two of us.”

“i didn't realize you'd remember that.”

“most people seem uncomfortable with silence. i never minded it much.”

“you seem to know more than you're saying.”

“you seem comfortable on your own. i wonder if that's the same thing as never feeling lonely.”

“do you always look this serious?”

“you're easier to talk to than i expected.”

“i've always thought trust is harder to earn than people pretend.”

“you always seem to be watching.”

“i think you've been avoiding me.”

“you're not at all what i thought you would be.”

“whenever i ignore my instincts, i end up regretting it. what about you?”

“i wasn't expecting to run into you again.”

“i can't tell if you're someone who enjoys solitude or just tolerates it.”

“i know it sounds childish, but i can't help believing some people are meant to find one another.”

“you make a terrible liar.”

“you don't strike me as the sort of person people forget.”

“i think people underestimate you.”

“i can't decide whether you're charming or frustrating.”

“i don't think i've seen you smile before.”

“i wasn't sure you'd come.”

“it's a little strange. i think i've started looking forward to seeing you.”

“sometimes i wonder if we ever really know anyone.”

“you're surprisingly good company.”

“i think most people would like to believe they're good. i'm not sure it's always that simple.”

“i think being truly understood is a far rarer thing than people realize.”

“i don't usually tell people this...”

a series of randomly assorted headcanon questions for character development. feel free to adjust or expand on any questions when sending and specify muse if you're sending to a multi.

Psychology Sentences, Vol. 9

(Sentences for interactions with therapists, psychologists, psychiatrists - or even just friends supporting each other. Adjust phrasing where needed)

"Being frightened is a normal, natural human function, just like breathing. It's how you react to fright that really counts."

"You feel used. Angry. Now we need to figure out whether if you're mad at me or yourself."

"You've spent so long wallowing in the past, wishing time would go backwards, but that is not how reality works."

"Isn't it all just a bit busy inside your head?"

"It can't be easy always having to prove that you belong."

"Most people's memories are unreliable. The things we see and that people say, they change over time. Your past is an illusion."

"Do you mind if I ask you a personal question? Are you happy?"

"You have to be careful fighting monsters or you might turn into one yourself."

"In such uncertain times, there is a great comfort to be found in the familiar."

"Just because something seems inevitable doesn't mean there isn't hope."

"Who are we if not the stories we tell ourselves?"

"In my experience, I find that when you set out to change the world, the world changes you instead."

"You solve everyone else's problems, but never your own."

"For me to help you, you're going to have to talk to me at some point."

"Do you ever wonder if all of this is just a dream?"

"You have an unquiet mind, and so you war with yourself like a dog trying to chew off its own tail."

"Only one person has a need to know what's the things inside my head, and that person is me."

"The truth doesn't care if you believe in it. It simply exists, whether we want it to or not."

"Does it hurt? The truth you keep hidden?"

"Human memory is sensory-based. Vision alone is not the strongest trigger. Sound and smell actually work better."

"I think if you could go back and go down a different path, you would."

"Human nature is interesting, don't you think? If you understand what makes someone tick, they become predictable."

"I think you're all about your work, and you don't know when to stop."

"Beware of ideas that are not your own."

"You said "you people". Is that because you don't think you're one of us?"

"Who teaches us to be normal when we're one of a kind?"

"Do you believe that I'm a good person? That a deserve just like everybody else?"

"What we are is as much where destiny takes us as it is what we do with the journey."

"You really don't have to save me from my own life, you know?"

"You can usually find a 'hidden' meaning in anything if you want it badly enough."

"You're not allowing yourself to feel things that you should be feeling."

Send a 💬 to hear how my muse feels about yours.

Source: a deleted blog

“Are you sad?”

“Are you okay?”

“Who hurt you?”

“Are you crying?”

“What about us?”

“What did you do?”

“Are you laughing?”

“Where did you go?”

“Did you hurt them?”

“Where will you go?”

“What do you need?”

“Are you mad at me?”

“Who did this to you?”

“Do you need a hug?”

“Would you be mine?”

“Are you happy here?”

“Do you forgive them?”

“How did you survive?”

“How could you leave?”

“Can I tell you a secret?”

“Where have you been?”

“How could you do this?”

“Have you eaten today?”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Do you forgive yourself?”

“Why can’t you love me?”

“Why would you say that?”

“How could you lie to me?”

“Will you accept my heart?”

“Do you want to share this?”

“Why don’t you believe me?”

“Would you try this with me?”

“When did you stop believing?”

“What are you thinking about?”

“When did that happen to you?”

“How long can you keep going?”

“Do you think we have a chance?”

“Do you know how much I love you?”