I'm so over feeling crappy about myself, I'm so over feeling like if I go for run I'm being judged, I'm just so over it.

So as of Monday I am going to run every Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Along with that I am going to start over the 30 Day Shred. And on the days I don't run I am going to try to talk my dog on a walk.I know I should start today, which is why I am going to go for a run, but if I start today I will already have to skip tomorrow because I am going to be in Toronto literally all day, so I won't have time.

The last time I did the 30 Day Shred I didn't see any results which was really what made me discouraged. But this time I'm adding running/walking for at least 30 minutes everyday and this time I'm really gonna try hard with eating better. I need to because I just can't bare to see the number on the scale continue to rise.

I made it to the last week of Ripped in 30 and quit. I wasn't seeing any results so I needed to stop and reevaluate what I was/wasn't doing.

So on this coming Thursday there's a job fair for Fortinos (it's a grocery store) and I'm going because I need a job, badly. And I'm stressing out on what I should wear and how I should act so I can get the job.

I think what's stressing me out the most is I'm 19, gonna be 20 in October and I've never had a job, not from lack of trying but because either a) I don't qualify because I've never had experience or b) I didn't do well in the interview. So I'm really freaking out about the interview part and what I'm gonna say when they ask me questions. And like what if they don't want me because I've never had experience but then there's a 14 year old who probably don't have experience either but they get the job.

And that's really discouraging because like WELL WHAT ABOUT ME! I'M 19, OLDER, MORE MATURE AND YET THERE'S SOME KID WHOSE BARELY A TEENAGER WHO GETS THE JOB!

UGH! I'm so stressed! I really need this job! Like I just need a break. SOMEONE needs to give me the chance to get experience! I won't be able to get it unless there's someone who's willing to give me a chance!

I know this has nothing to do with fitness but I needed to get it out, and I didn't want to do it on my personal blog cause I have friends who follow me there and I don't want them seeing me this way. Plus my one "friend" (there's a complicated story that I won't explain) if she reads this and if she doesn't already know about the job fair then she'll probably go and right now she's my competition, and I just can't.

Level 2-Level 3 Results. A bit of a difference but not a whole lot. These post level 3 pictures will be used as my before pictures for doing both 30DS Level 1 and Ripped in 30.

Didn't update the past 2 days cause I didn't really know what to say... Anyway now I have stuff to say because I HAVE OFFICIALLY COMPLETE JILLIAN MICHAEL'S 30 DAY SHRED!

And in honour of that, here's a day 30 post workout selfie :D

Smiling cause I actually completed it, and only took breaks on the days before a new level began. And you can't really tell but trust me my face and back of my neck were super sweaty!

Ohmygod. Never will I ever leave my work out to that late ever again! I was in Toronto from 1:30-5:30 (approximately) and then went over to her house after. And didn't get home till after 11.

So I literally finished my workout maybe 10 minutes ago. And I was seriously considering not doing it then doing 2 tomorrow, but I was like "nope, gotta do this. Too close to the end to not" so I did it even though it was super late and my family is sleeping! 

So yesterday was good, a bit of pain in the shoulders but nothing I couldn't handle. But then there's today.

I woke up super dizzy, and thought okay maybe I just need some food. That helped a little bit, then I went to do my exercises and I got through the first circuit before I felt really dizzy. So I finished that then stopped because the room is kinda spinning...

So my abs are kinda sore from yesterday, which I guess is a good sign. Level is definitely harder, but I like these exercises more than level 2.