MalkavianGraves

#biblically accurate roomba

The true lesson of Homestuck is that if you want your alien OCs to become popular, provide one (1) suggestively bizarre detail about their reproductive biology and adamantly refuse to elaborate.

and the lord of the rings. tolkien invented whole languages and cultures and mythologies and histories, and the staggering enormity of the worldbuilding tolkein accomplished is only ever hinted at in the actual corpus of the lord of the rings, but he never wrote down the elf words for cock and balls

elves don’t have testicles

This actually brings up an interesting point. Humans only have testicles because our body temperature is too hot to allow sperm to live inside the body. So if elves have a lower body temperature, which it is slightly suggested as they don’t feel the cold the way men do, it’s entirely possible that elves, in fact, do not have testicles, cause they don’t need them.

Hey, we’re back on topic.

Happiness Will Come To You.

when tho

When You Least Expect It. Probably Late March

reblog for happiness to come for you in late march!

I reblogged this last year and I hung out with blink-182 backstage on March 30. Reblogging again because it worked the first time.

honestly, last year one of the best days of my life happened in late March

Hey, I’ll give it a shot!

hasznos!

i love this age of millennial parents tweeting the daily antics of their children

Toddlers are weird. Mine is a trip all day long.

A little girl and her mom came into my gym last year and when I asked her what she wanted to be when she grew up, she said “I wanna go to space to see the lizards!” And wouldn’t elaborate about these space lizards

I’m straight up CRYING

sometimes i forget that bart is canonically a telepath

HES A WHAT