❁

Add on all the school shootings in the US, inaction on climate change, and a pandemic that was allowed to rip through schools unchecked, kids and young adults have a deep sense that their lives are disposable. And they're right! Our society is systematically hostile and abusive to children in so many ways! However, the only child abuse society gets riled up about is pedophilia. Adults act like pedophilia is the only kind of child abuse that counts as abuse.

And that's why I think we are seeing kids stretching the meaning of pedophilia. They are looking for language that encompasses all of the kinds of abuse that they're experiencing. All of the emotional abuse of children is normalized, quite a bit of physical abuse is normalized, and the lack of privacy, agency, and bodily autonomy is all socially enforced. The truth is that all of these other forms of abuse can and do lead to sexual abuse, too. These kids are on to something, but it's getting deflected and warped by the fact that they still live in the dangerous environments they've been abused in. I think more specific language will be empowering here and will also bridge the gap between the current generation of young people and other anti-violence movements.

So if you are a child or young adult who resonates with any of the above, I want you to know that as a child abuse survivor, I believe you when you say that you've been abused. I think the anxiety about fandom websites and queer people and kink is misplaced because strangers don't usually have the structural power and access to you to hurt you but I know that there are people in you life who do have that power and I'm worried about you. I think ao3/queer/kink are just the issues that you feel safest speaking up about. I see you speaking up and I think there's more going on.

So what I can do for you, as a random stranger on the internet, is give you some resources and language so you can start to articulate your experiences and find solidarity with others.

Some terms you might find helpful:

Here's a copy of the UN's Convention on the Rights of the Child. The US has refused to sign this but it's still a good idea of what the rest of the world believes you deserve and what we know will help you thrive.

Here's a copy of the power and control wheel for child abuse. Power and control wheels are commonly used in many forms of victim advocacy to help map abuse. To be clear, we count these things as abuse because we know from research that they are traumatic. Many laws have not been updated to include all these forms, so you'll notice that many of the things on this wheel are completely legal even though we know they are harmful.

Additionally, I'm including a zine I found on peer support for suicide ideation. I know that growing up, my friends and I were always told to tell a trusted adult but we didn't have one and ended up trying to help each other through some really awful shit. This is a guide written by someone with a similar experience and it details ways to informally support someone who is feeling suicidal.

Yeah, the above definitely isn't happening in a vacuum- nor is child abuse or lack of privacy particularly new.

It's a new kind of violation of privacy, and definitely a wider-scale one, too; I remember my mom recording me when I was upset as a way of shaming me into silence, and I cannot imagine how much more traumatic that would be if it actually had been posted somewhere public.

But what's different here isn't just increased forms of surveillance, or increased public involvement in surveillance and humiliation. Radical feminism utilizes cult-like recruiting tactics, and that adds to this as well: the insistence that they are In Danger, that they are The Most Victimized, that they Cannot Trust Anyone- Especially Adults (except, of course, the adults telling them this. Those adults are special and uniquely trustworthy.)

This instills a paranoia and distrust of authority that also fosters isolation, forcing the victims of this rhetoric to cut off all potential help in favor of leaning on The Group, and exclusively The Group. If they feel as if they can't trust anyone else, no one else will be able to recognize what's going on or, if they do, help them.

Radical feminism is probably also rising in part because of the phenomena @glossyfeathers is describing, i.e., people who are already feeling paranoid and distrustful see radfem rhetoric and find it resonates with that mental state.

It makes them feel validated: here is an explanation for why they're so afraid, here is validation that someone is hurting them (men, adults, society), here is a path to safety. All you have to do is cut off all support systems, isolate yourself entirely from society and everyone who loves you, and rely only on people who think exactly like you.

And more appealing, too, is the feeling of moral superiority: not only are you valid in your pain, but you are better than them because of it. Not only are you valid in your discomfort with queerness and sexuality, but you are purer because of it. You are the Most Victim, the one everyone should be focusing on and listening to. And because you are the Most Victim, because you are a child who Cannot Be Held Accountable, you are therefore inherently correct and inherently incapable of really doing any wrong.

It's not just validating; it's a promise of power. It's the white witch with a tin of Turkish delights.

And all the shame they feel, all the self-loathing they internalized, keeps their lips firmly sealed and their self-confidence firmly in question. They aren't actually pure- they're just listening to the people who are. Their shame makes them superior to Outsiders, but their own impurities makes them inferior to the people who claim not to have any of those "deviant" impulses or thoughts in the first place.

The white witch is giving you power, but you still have to do as she says in order to keep it.

They cling to radical feminism, empowered and entrapped by it, and radical feminism is in turn empowered: now capable of recruiting in higher and higher numbers.

get a list of everything in your library so you can find the music again elsewhere. i dont have spotify so i cant test it but something like this

But wait, there's more!

While your playlist is going you can add another queue to the lineup and you can either make musicolet continue your current queue or jump to the next one. Also everything is editable as FUCK. You can edit song titles, artist names, publication dates, you can even place custom icons.

I mostly use it to listen to subliminals (because YouTube is allergic to playing my shit in the background or without stopping mid-playlist ("are you still there" no I fucking shifted to Star Trek after I hit the play button on my glow up subliminal 🫠)) but look at this:

LOOK HOW NICE THIS IS

Umas das coisas que sempre admirou no povo do mar, antes da maldição, era a forma com a qual suas características sempre se sobressaíam, independente de qual fosse. Agora, após ser acordado, viu que essa característica ainda se mantinha, e havia sido exatamente isso que havia deixado Damon tão inquieto desde a primeira vez em que viu a morena no evento; lidar com espiões de Hemera em um local cheio como aquele definitivamente era algo que ele não queria lidar naquela noite. Agora, ouvindo aquele som, tinha a certeza de que os sereianos estavam no evento. Amaldiçoou Hemera mentalmente e então respirou fundo, precisava estar perfeitamente calmo para não acabar criando uma cena desnecessária.

Respirou fundo uma outra vez e seguiu o som; não demorou muito para passar pela estátua e estar dentro do Covil. "Um bar, é claro" pensou enquanto olhava em volta. Franziu o cenho ao observar as cores diferentes que as bebidas tinham "Que inferno" pensou, já podia imaginar todos os tipos de situações que poderiam acontecer até o fim daquela noite. Andou mais um pouco até que a encontrou novamente, servindo bebidas aos presentes. Andou até garota da maneira mais despreocupada que pode. "Sabe, o povo do mar sempre foi muito fácil de se identificar, sempre tem uma característica que simplesmente salta aos olhos." Falou em um tom mais baixo, de forma que apenas ela o escutasse. Sua voz era suave, assim como sua expressão. "Deve ter sido bastante trabalhoso organizar tudo, trazer todos pra cá" - Observou a garota por um breve instante - "Me pergunto a razão de tudo isso."

Disfarça a surpresa de ver aquele rosto novamente,o rei dos mares,dos sereianos e da falta de carisma. O olha de cima a baixo e relaxa os ombros que sem querer tensionou

— As razões não são minhas para entender,senhor - Diz em tom baixo — Mas de qualquer forma,não saberia do que está falando. Sou apenas parte da equipe.

Sua inocencia fazia Poseidon parecer um lunatico.

— Mas claro,o povo do mar deve ser extremamente distinto,se é o que você diz.

Sonsa.

— Posso ajudar com algo? Ou apenas queria o prazer da minha companhia?

com a bebida azul na mão direita, o homem aproximou-se da atração que chamou sua atenção minutos atrás, aproveitando o intervalo dela. o olhar fuzilado para si e sua chefe, parecendo até que tinha más intenções fez com que desejasse ter um chapéu para tirar. realmente, se não fosse uma apresentação, provavelmente acreditaria que tinha feito algo de errado com ela. ou sua chefe. mas, sabia muito bem que nenhum deles a conhecia e, portanto, se tratava apenas de uma boa interpretação. 

“você tem um olhar bem intenso.” começou a dizer, bebericando daquela bebida que nem sabia, mas, seu efeito era deixá-lo mais sincero. ainda bem que estava longe da idosa que cuidava ou acabaria dizendo sem querer sobre o terrível cheiro de seu perfume; forte demais para seu gosto. “é atriz? deveria ser, principalmente de filmes de terror. acho que conseguiria assustar qualquer um só olhando daquele jeito.”

— Só quanto preciso.

Reage ao comentario de um homem que de repente de aproxima do tanque,saindo pela entrada superior e sentando em uma das escadas,Lyyn o observou em silêncio antes de responder :

— Assustar não é bem meu trabalho aqui.

Suspira cansada,mas logo recompõe sua pose e desce devagar até o homem com a bebida azul.

— Quer dizer que preciso mudar de carreira, senhor?

Observar os Deuses não era divertido de maneira alguma, manter-los na linha muito menos. Sorriu levemente voltando ao papel de garçonete seminua em um bar secreto, agindo como um nessa situação geralmente age.