𝔟𝔯𝔞𝔫𝔡 𝔫𝔢𝔴

chocolate hues fluttered open as another body shifted her awake. even if he hadn’t spoken, daysia would’ve known it was mac. no one else would be crawling into bed with her. she kept her lips shut tight in a thin line as he spoke, trying to form a coherent sentence while still coming out of her sleepy stupor. “then you could just talk to me?” she whispered. it probably wasn’t the right response. she shook her head and rolled around to face mac, a sad smile tugging at the corners of her lips. daysia met the male’s gaze, before yawning into her pillow. “what time is it? are you okay?” she was finally coming to. for the first time in weeks, her head wasn’t pounding. her injuries had healed up pretty well, but she still didn’t look like herself. honestly, she wasn’t sure who that was anymore. those few seconds of oblivion when your eyes open after waking up had completely disappeared, and daysia was remembering why the two hadn’t talked much, but there wasn’t a lot she could do to avoid this conversation when he was in bed with her – besides, she wanted nothing more than to curl into him and fall asleep. instead, she just stared. “you can tell me if something’s wrong.”

“I, um, I don’t really know. I didn’t look at the clock. I lost count at like, 942 ticks.” He chuckled softly as Daysia rolled over. He was relieved to know that she wasn’t mad at him for the time he took to process the fight. Truthfully, Malcolm was glad her face was healing, seeing her precious features in disarray was something he couldn’t stomach so as he brought his hand up to push back her curls, he smiled wide. “But, I’m.. fine. I just wanted to see you.” Mac scooted in a hair closer, his finger tips trailing her spine as he looked down into her eyes. He had to sit up on her pillows or else his feet would have hung off the edge of the bed. But he didn’t mind, it was easier to welcome Day into his chest this way if she so choose. “You know the last time we went this long without talking? When I went home to New York and I lost my phone in the airport and had to wait to get back here to get a new phone..” He told, pursing his lips together as he softly spoke though there was no one around to wake it. It just felt better to whisper in the quiet. “I’m sorry for being a jerk. I-I.. love you too, D.” Malcolm released a deep breath as he thought about Nate. How confidently he strolled into his apartment to confess his love for the girl in his arms made Malcolm nauseous. But being in Day’s presence made it so much better. “Does, um, does your face still hurt? Or can I kiss you, you think?”

He knew these things, of course he did. Nathaniel was well aware of how Daysia felt about Mac.  “I’m gonna tell her.” He eventually said, and then he suddenly remembered something and his eye twitched. “You’re sure they’re definite? Didn’t one of your exes beat her face in recently?” He knew Day never told him exactly what she had said to the other girl but he just knew he didn’t like the way she had talked about herself. Now, Nate was getting a little agitated and he leaned in and lowered his voice. “she thought she deserved it, y’know?” He wondered if this was taking it too far or if it was crossing boundaries. He just didn’t care at this point. “I just don’t know how you could’ve let anything like that happen, but yeah man. You’re great boyfriend material.”

“Only thing I’m certain of,” Malcolm said confidently but then tucked his lower lips between his teeth nervously as Nate brought up Saph. It was a sensitive topic and the fact he was going to use it as leverage in a fight over Daysia was low. Malcolm had never pegged the other was deceitful or manipulative but he should have known to expect the unexpected. “There was nothing I could do about that,” Malcolm retorted, taking a menacing step towards the other. Yeah man. You’re great boyfriend material. “Cool it,” Malcolm growled, not being able to mask the tension that he held in his angry jaw. “You have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Nate let out a scoff. He knew this would be difficult. He didn’t understand what the peacher wanted him to do here. How much was he supposed to fight with Malcolm on this? He glanced back at him when he mentioned their previous conversation..which Nate had honestly completely forgot about. He squinted his eyes. “I-no. I still like girls. I told you that.” Okay, but truthfully when was the last time Nate had romantic feelings for a girl? He shook his head. His sexuality was the last thing he wanted to think about right now. “I’ve been thinking about it-her a lot, lately.” His brain scrambled for something else believable to say. “I think she deserves better than you, maybe that’s me.” He said with a shug. Nate could believe that. However, he still didn’t want to end up in a loveless relationship like the one his parents had. It wasn’t fair to anyone. Especially, if Daysia had real feelings for someone else and Nate was keeping her away from them. Even if that person was Malcolm. Nate internally groaned. The Peacher was going to pay for this.

There was no way to describe how Malcolm felt other than confused. There was a pit in his stomach, bred by the pang of shock that had washed over him given the topic of conversation. It wasn’t the easiest thing to talk about and on top of that, it hadn’t been expected whatsoever especially after their last conversation. “What makes you think you’re better than me?” Malcolm scoffed, leaning against the kitchen counter with a narrowed gaze. “I don’t do drugs, I have a stable job, not to mention my feelings for her aren’t just a maybe or an I think. They’re definite.” Was his job stable? Not as of late with his recent behavior. Plus he only abused prescriptions. Did that make him a better person, a better fit for Daysia? “Why are you telling me this anyways? Why aren’t you tell her this? Not that she would feel the same way.” Would she? His confidence was a transparent sham. Hopefully Nate couldn’t see through it.

@daysiias​

He managed to nod and stepped inside of Mac’s apartment. Nate knew he was a shit liar when it came to stuff unrelated to his past, but this was just part of keeping that secret. He shut his eyes for a moment, and then felt himself snap into the role he had to play. He relaxed his shoulders and opened his eyes again. “Whatever’s going on between you and Day..”He trailed off and glanced over at a spot on the wall and then gazed back at Malcolm’s face. daddy’s dirty little secrets… “It needs to stop.” He tried his best to remember that he didn’t even like Malcolm in the first place and hoped that Daysia would forgive him for this later.  “I’m in love with her.” 

Watching Nate uncomfortable shift into the apartment made Malcolm raise his brow skeptically. He let the door free fall close behind him as he burrowed the flesh of his hand deeply into his jean pockets. The opening statement wasn’t good and to be truthful, Malcolm didn’t totally know what to expect from the outcome. Was he getting broken up with through a friend like in middle school? Was he about to give him a stern talking to about respecting a woman? Malcolm waited, studying as Nate avoided his gaze. “Needs to stop?” Malcolm softly laughed as he repeated the man’s words back to him. He wasn’t entirely certain of what course this conversation was taking and his vague nature did not make it much clearer. But then the word love fell into the air. “You’re in love with me?” Malcolm repeated. “Did you just say you thought you were say or something? And that you didn’t like Day.. at all?” The man was far more confused than he was angry or hurt. Nothing was going to stop him from being with Daysia, certainly not this professed love for the girl. “Well, sorry man. I’m not just going to stop.. what I’m doing so you can be with her. That’d be.. dude, that’d be dumb.”

“You know, that almost sounds messed up enough to be true. I had birds painted on my walls as a kid and while I wouldn’t say they’ve made me carefree or whatever, I really fucking hate those evil flying demons now,” Dominic quipped before biting into his slice of pizza, the cheese pulling like every cartoon he’s ever seen. Pizza in New York was still undefeated, but Luigi’s wasn’t all that bad. It definitely beat some of the mainstream places in Toronto, that was for sure. Dom settled back against the couch and focused his eyes on the television. He could feel the tense muscles in his neck and shoulders relaxing with every bite and it felt nice to have some small sense of normalcy once again. However, he couldn’t say the same for Mac. His shoulders were stiff, jaw tense and fingers curled tight enough around the plate that he was beginning to wonder if he’d break it. It was blatantly obvious that there was a lot on his mind.

“I figured you’d be over everyday, eating chicken soup and watching movies in bed.  Thought you guys were a thing now, or whatever. I don’t know. Are you? Dating, I mean. Or are you guys just hooking up?” Dominic’s words stumbled clumsily from his lips. He wanted to be in the loop, to know where his two best friends stood in their messy potential relationship, but most of all, he wanted to make sure they were both okay. After making a mess earlier on in the year, he was trying to make it up and keep the three of them together for as long as possible. 

“You’re talking to the wrong person about birds. Those NYC pigeons are a different breed and by a different breed I mean, they’re government operated drones working for the bourgeoisie.” Malcolm laughed softly, genuinely. It felt like happiness was dwindling these days so to feel the effort melt away in Dominic’s presence was like his body taking a sigh of relief. It was just what the doctor ordered. For the two to know be talking about Daysia, given their history with her, felt uncomfortable. But there really wasn’t much to say. Mac hadn’t quite hit it off with Daysia romantically even despite their pact to focusing on their relationship. The odds were stacking against them and it was hard to believe they’d be able to see over the wall separating them from happiness. “Yeah, no. I.. I didn’t know how to react. I-I love Saph, obviously. I always will. But, I’m not taking her side because what she did was fucked up. But, what Day said was also fucked up. So I’m not picking sides.” He sighed, knowing that wasn’t supposed to be the case. He should have been standing at Daysia’s side defending her to Saph but, Malcolm couldn’t help but let his conflicting feelings getting in the way. “No, by the way,” Malcolm forced a laugh. “We’re not dating. Or hooking up. Not the right time, even if I did give in and go spoon her the other night and she kept rubbing up against me. Like, she knew what she was doing. But, I just - I don’t know. I don’t like when people lie. Even if I did want to overlook being mad at her for like twenty minutes to.. you know.. love her.”

malcolmvramsey​:

Maybe when he saw her mother in obituary section of the paper, he hadn’t put two and two together. Mercy had talked about her, of course, but in Malcolm’s narrow mind at the time perhaps he’d over looked it. He felt a nervous pang in his chest, but he tried to stand his ground regardless. “Sorry ‘bout that.” His demeanor was cold, which was unlike him. He knew what it was like to lose a parent so you think he would have showcased a bit more sympathy. “The only answer was to hurt those who care about you?” Malcolm repeated slowly. “That wasn’t the answer. That shouldn’t have even been an option.”

“Me too.” Not much else Mercy could say on the matter, merely brushing off his remarks with nothing but a shrug of her shoulder. The loss of her mother had been something she mourned years before the woman actually died. “Malcolm..” she said softly, her tone of voice sounding as if it were pleading for him to understand. Those light eyes reflecting the same emotion. “There so was so much goin’ on at the time and I just needed an escape. Runnin’ away was the only thin’ I thought I could do.” It was the only thing she could do. The tears she’d been so desperately trying to hold back began to spill over her lids, but a hand immediately rose to wipe them away. Mercy knew exactly what she’d been getting herself into by returning home and for that, she didn’t deserve to cry.   “It’s just – you wouldn’t understand.” No one would. No one would be able to understand why it hurt so much to just walk down the streets of Peach Hollows, having to be stuck in the same small town she had tried so hard to leave behind. Or why the only thing that seemed to run through her mind was taking the first opportunity she could find to leave again. Just the mere thought of it was enough to have a broken laugh slip past her lips as Mercy wiped away more tears.

There was no proper response to someone pouring tears over something you did. Malcolm responded poorly to social cues regularly, never mind negative ones that caused friction or conflict. But he licked his lips, sighing as he looked at her soft crystal blue eyes transforming from a perfectly flowing ocean to a tsunami of fierce tears that could not have been predicted even by the most skilled forecaster. “I understand,” He rebutted, acknowledging that he in fact did have capabilities of understanding the complexities of life. His life had twisting turns and complications in the same way. “I’ve been through tough times, hell I’m still going through them. But I stick it out.” Malcolm took a step towards her. His fingers itched to push back her tears sympathetic, in the same way his heart urged him as well. But the hurt the was etched into his brain reminded him what she’d done, how ruthless she’d been. Why couldn’t it be his turn? “Did you even think about me? Mercy, did you even.. did you even miss me?”

Despite hearing him say that it wasn’t her fault, it was hard to believe it. When Saphira loved, she loved hard. It was her biggest fault because despite not seeming like it, she had a lot of insecurities –the main being abandonment. Yes, she had mommy issues. And more often than not, her insecurities ruined anything good that she had going for her. Such as her relationship with Malcolm. Had she not felt like she had part of the reason that he wasn’t doing so good, she would’ve tried to fight for their love. As hard as it was, losing him was better than watching him completely lose it again. He deserved to be happy, even if it wasn’t with her. Accepting that reality was the tricky part though. Every fiber of her being still loved him. Still craved his touch. Even now after everything that happened, all she wanted was for him to pull her into his arms and tell her that they would be alright. “They didn’t tell you?” She was surprised. Saph could’ve sworned they would’ve told just to see the man off on her. Seems like Daysia knew she was in the wrong after all, although what was Dom’s excuse? “I’m glad you’re not mad at me.” she stood a little closer without really thinking. “I know, it’s just easier sometimes you know….I don’t wanna fight anymore. Not with you.”

Being in love with Saphira was a rollercoaster in its own regard. And falling out of love with her was just the same. Each had their twists and turns that made you question the machine’s trajectory. Where is this going? Is it too late to stop it? But if she was the cart, Malcolm was the track leading right alongside her, there for all the loops and bumps in the ride that make you scream either our of joy or terror. “Yeah, uh. Nope. Nah, they didn’t.” He shook his head, eyes squinting at the sunlight ricocheted off his irises. It was disheartening, making a sigh rumble from his lips despite his casualty. “Leave it to my BFF, Jill.” He laughed softly although it sounded nearly robotic in its delivery, each syllable having a tinge of a thought out, computerized sense to them. He’d almost forgotten he was still holding Saphira’s hand in his. Malcolm intertwined his fingers in hers as he looked down at her, being cautious to not further wound her. “No more fighting,” He repeated with a nod. “Not us, not you and Day, almost Jill and I but I quickly defused the situation. Not Jill and I either.”

“Pretty sure she’s with Sophie figuring out nursery stuff. I offered to help but my patience for pastel zoo animals is wearing unbelievably thin and I can tell she’s tired of me suggesting a dinosaur themed room,” he explained with a simple shrug of his shoulders. The last few weeks had been spent nailing down detail after detail in preparation of little man’s arrival, and now it was just a matter of putting everything into action. The registry, or whatever, was in the works and all he had to do was put together a crib. Or so he liked to think. It was easier to be ignorant than to live under the crushing weight of his responsibilities. “What? We can’t just hang out and eat pizza? We haven’t done this shit in forever. We used to sit around, eat pizza and watch cartoons until the sun came up. Now’s the tie to catch me up to speed. What’s new? How are you and Day?” The words you and day elicited a shiver down his spine but Dominic did his best to continue as if nothing had happened.

“Dinosaurs are superior. You should mentally prepare yourself that your kid is going to be a Lion for Halloween with an animal theme nursery. There is a direct correlation between a kid’s personality and their room theme.” Malcolm pointed out. If the nursery was in their apartment, it surely would have been decked out in all things prehistoric. It also probably would have been increasingly disorganized as the due date grew near but there was no point discussing that. “You’re right. Beavis and Butthead and Italian cuisine it is.” Malcolm nodded as he made his way over to the couch and plopped down, pulling up the aforementioned cartoon as he thought about Dom’s question. He used his tongue to clean out the cheese between his teeth but also to chew in thought. “Me? Dandy.” He lied, which must have been obvious judging by his distance. “Daysia is... healing. I don’t really know how she is really, we haven’t talked a lot since I found out about the whole thing.” Malcolm spoke casually about the fight. Admittedly, this was the first time the boys had talked about it and without the excess of Xanax calming his being, it would have been a much louder conversation. “We’ll be okay though, I’m sure. I do miss her. I’ve just needed some time to..” Think? He hadn’t been doing much of that. Medicate was a better answer. Forget was the best answer. Desensitize. “uh, think about it. But I’m sure we’ll be back at full strength soon.”

Scarlett hadn’t seen Mac in what felt like a bit, being she mostly just went to work and then home and if anything traveled at a snail’s pace. They were right about the waddling when you get this big you just feel the need to. Smiling she was happy to hear she didn’t need to run and get an epipen, “Wonderful, then you can enjoy these!” she grinned holding up the baking dish covered with foil. “If Dom comes down and eats the ones I made you then he’s going to be in trouble because this is my third batch and the first two didn’t make it down because of him.” she chuckled handing them over. Seeing his state she wondered if he wasn’t feeling the best not that she would judge he practically saw her at her worst. “You need anything while I’m up, a drink? I don’t know if you’re a milk and brownies guy or something else?” 

“Isn’t it common for guys to get chubby when their wives are expecting?” Malcolm asked. It was common knowledge from what he knew. But what he had known for certain was that he had been reading way too many baby books on the toilet out of pure boredom. Was that something that Dominic should have been doing? Yeah, but Malcolm couldn’t help his curiosity to be prepared in case a baby were to pop up the way it had for Dom. Of course, for that to happen, he would have had to be having sex. Mid-chew Malcolm had noticed his use of word wife. “Not that - Dom is proposing. Don’t think this is me spilling the beans. I’m actually very good at keeping a secret. So when he is, you’ll never know. Even if he was now.. you’d.. you’d, uh, never know.” Malcolm sputtered with a mouth full of brownie as he attempted to backtrack. “Milk would be good, though. Yeah.” He nodded as he freed up a spot for her on the couch. “Have you guys picked out a name yet? Malcolm’s cute, and trending in 2020 baby names form what I hear. Not to mention it will most certainly be your child’s name if I don’t come out of a fire in the next month, so you better start liking it.” Mac took the glass from Scarlett and took a sip. He tilted his head at her as he swallowed. “Too morbid?”

⚠️ a text meant for someone else.

M [10:32PM]: we just got back from a call and i cut my hand pretty bad

M [10:33PM]: any advice on how to take care of it, miss emt? other than to go fuck myself, of course

M [10:45PM]: hey sorry, i meant to text saph but no worries, my hand is fine. 

💫 a late night text.

M [2:04AM]: i miss u even though you’re only like a two feet away

M [2:04AM]: ok not like actually two feet i wish but ur door was locked so i figured you wanted to be alone

“No bitches. Just.. one b -- one girl. One respectable female I have my eyes on.”

“I.. uh, I don’t.. intend to. I don’t really have control over what my, or really any, girl does. Better to not get involved, you know?”