My nephew is coming up on his second birthday. He’s talking a bit now, but his first–and favorite–word is “Clock.” Probably this is because of the abundance of clocks in his environment; my grandfather repairs clocks as a hobby and so we all have dozens. There’s a clock withing sight basically anywhere you go in our home.
My nephew, who does not understand the concept of time, only of shiny moving objects, believes that any circular thing with markings on it is a clock. And he will point at that object and shout “CLOCK!” as loudly as he can. If it’s an especially remarkable circle, he’ll go with the high praise of “BIG CLOCK!!” It’s pretty cute most of the time.
My parents attend a fairly large church, of the protestant non-denominational variety. It’s very modern and trendy, and they have a dedicated design team that makes graphics and visuals for the sermons, which are displayed on massive projector screens. Most Sundays, there are eight-hundred-odd people at each service. And on one Sunday a couple months back, my whole family went together, my nephew included.
He’s mostly pretty good about sitting quietly when everyone else is sitting quietly. So when the pastor came up and began the prayer, my nephew hushed along with everyone else.
But then the projector visuals changed from the lyrics from the last worship song to the logo for the sermon series. Which was a simple lineart circle with text around the edge.
It was, as far as my nephew was concerned, a BIG CLOCK.
Naturally, he announced his discovery as loud as possible.
My nephew is a baby. He can’t actually say the word “clock” correctly. So what he actually shouted, at the top of his lungs, into a room of eight hundred silently praying christians, was
Luckily for us, the quarantine was instituted only a few days later, and we haven’t had to go back to church and face our shame.
yousharknotpass
jimmyeatworldofficial
tangentwithtanner
theartofmadeline
amandla
titsay
romaincrisis
