Mango

Disclaimer: Harry Styles is a grown man none of us have ever met, with money and access to all kinds of excess. I’m not here to claim he’s completely sober or some innocent child—that’s not what this post is about.

What has Harry said about drugs?

If we go in chronological order, the first time Harry ever mentioned drugs was as a joke during a press conference One Direction gave for their movie in 2013. A journalist said, "Everything about you is positive—your lyrics, your energy," to which Harry interrupted with, "Apart from my drug tests. They’re all negative."

That’s obviously a joke, but I thought we’d start with some lighthearted humor. In reality, the first time he really addressed this kind of topic was in his first Rolling Stone profile in 2017:

“People romanticize places they can’t get to themselves. That’s why it’s fascinating when people go dark—when Van Gogh cuts off his ear. You romanticize those people, sometimes out of proportion. It’s the same with music. You want a piece of that darkness, to feel their pain but also to step back into your own [safer] life. I can’t say I had that. I had a really nice upbringing. I feel very lucky. I had a great family and always felt loved. There’s nothing worse than an inauthentic tortured person. ‘They took my allowance away, so I did heroin.’ It’s like—that’s not how it works. I don’t even remember what the question was.”

Essentially, he’s explaining that he doesn’t see himself as tortured or dark. He considers himself lucky and loved. Of course, this doesn’t mean that someone like him couldn’t fall into addiction, but it certainly acts as a mitigator.

In August 2019, his second Rolling Stone interview came out. He was shadowed by Rob Sheffield for several months, and they discussed a bit of everything. This was the first time he talked openly about taking drugs.

Psychedelics have started to play a key role in his creative process. “We’d do mushrooms, lie down on the grass, and listen to Paul McCartney’s Ram in the sunshine,” he says. “We’d just turn the speakers into the yard.” The chocolate edibles were kept in the studio fridge, right next to the blender. “You’d hear the blender going, and think, ‘So we’re all having frozen margaritas at 10 a.m. this morning.’” He points to a corner: “This is where I was standing when we were doing mushrooms and I bit off the tip of my tongue. So I was trying to sing with all this blood gushing out of my mouth. So many fond memories, this place.” It’s not mere rock-star debauchery — it’s emblematic of his new state of mind. You get the feeling this is why he enjoys studios so much. After so many years making One Direction albums while touring, always on the run, he finally gets to take his time and embrace the insanity of it all. “We were here for six weeks in Malibu, without going into the city,” he says. “People would bring their dogs and kids. We’d take a break to play cornhole tournaments. Family values!” But it’s also the place where he has proudly bled for his art. “Mushrooms and Blood. Now there’s an album title.”

A few months later, in November 2019, he did a lengthy interview with Zane Lowe where he discussed the drug use he had first talked about in the Rolling Stone profile.

Just a heads-up—this interview is very conversational. He starts by saying that he doesn’t do drugs or even drink while touring:

"I think part of the thing with, like, the mushrooms thing for me is like—I never do anything when I'm working. I don't even drink when I'm working, if I'm touring or anything. I don't drink really, at all."

This is a sentiment he would go on to repeat multiple times in later interviews and as late as 2022/2023. He then explained that he didn’t do drugs at all while he was in One Direction:

"And when I was in the band, it was like—to me, it felt like it was so much bigger than any of us, that I kind of felt like, 'I'm not gonna be the one who fucks it up.' (…) I'm not gonna be the guy who messes it up, so I was like, 'I'm not gonna do any of that stuff.'"

This is something Louis would later confirm, by the way, but let’s keep going with the interview. He then said that when he went solo, he felt free to experiment:

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Harry: So, I was like, 'Now [in his solo career] is the time in my life when you probably go out and experiment, and do this, and take this, and do that.' Zane: Cause it's on your shoulders. Harry: Yeah. And that's what you do with your friends. (...) Making this record felt like—I just felt so much more joyous. And I was with my friends, and we were in Malibu. Zane: Safe! Harry: Yeah, I felt so safe. It was like, 'If I want to take some mushrooms, I'm gonna take some mushrooms.' Like, now's the time to have fun. Like, we're in Malibu. I'm 24 [years old]. I'm also in music. I'm not, like... D'you know? It's like— Zane: You're not gonna be the first musician to experiment in that environment. Harry: I'm not, like, a politician. I don't think it's that crazy.

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It kind of feels like he's defending himself a little bit. In my opinion, Harry seems to be a bit judgmental of himself. In the past, he’s also expressed discomfort about people knowing he had sex. He’s said things like, "Tweet as if your grandma was gonna read it," and he sometimes apologizes for swearing (which, to this day, he does quite sparingly). Being constantly analyzed by such a huge audience since he was 16 and criticized for every move he made probably didn’t help, but I have a feeling it’s also a bit inherent to him—that sense of needing to meet some unrealistic or unnecessary standard for his audience.

Zane then asks him if he enjoyed it, to which Harry replies:

"My thing with drugs is—if you're taking anything to escape, or to try and hide from stuff, then you shouldn't even drink. And if you're taking anything to, like, have fun and be creative, then great. Making an album, you obviously get so in your head, and so self-conscious about everything. You hit these bumps in the road, where you're kind of thinking, 'Is this good enough? Is this enough? Is that enough?' And there's like an afterflow of some of that stuff where—sometimes you take something, and then for ten days after, you're like, 'Don't worry about it. Everything's gonna be fine.' It's kind of stress-relieving in a sense."

So far, he’s saying that he didn’t experiment until after he left One Direction (so he was at least 22 years old), and that he uses substances sparingly, surrounded by friends, in a safe environment, and recreationally for creative purposes—mainly to get out of his own head when he’s stuck. He only mentions mushrooms and edibles but it’s implied that there may be other substances involved (presumably weed, maybe LSD, nothing too heavy, at least in what he says).

He also seems pretty aware of the dangers of taking substances, which shows not only maturity but also that he’s surrounded by the kind of environment that helped him stay cautious.

A few months after this interview (March 2020), he did another lengthy one, this time with Howard Stern. In this interview, he talked about drug use again and expanded a little bit on it. Howard asked him how he felt taking them, clarifying that he had taken them himself in the 70s. Harry replied with, "What did they do to you?" and Howard said they made him giggle and gave him a happy, overall good feeling. To which Harry said:

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Harry: Yeah, kind of the same. I never take them if I’m in a weird place. I feel like you wanna go at them as, like, a fun, creative thing rather than, like, 'Oh, I don’t wanna be in the real world, so I’m gonna take something.' Howard: Did it help you write? Most people describe writing music as really hard because of the business pressure but also the creative pressure. Is it like a stress relief? Harry: That’s a big part of it for me, I found. A lot of the time, you get so in your head about writing songs. As you’re writing songs, you finish a verse and go, 'Is this good? Is this good enough?' And you don’t know. You just started it. For me, a big part of it is getting out of my own head. And I feel like whenever I’m trying to write good music is usually when I write the worst music—or at least my least favorite music.

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In this same interview, he expanded on the tongue-biting incident he alluded to in the Rolling Stone one:

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Howard: And when you recorded the album, you bit a piece of your tongue off? How did you do that? I've never done that.

Harry: Well, the aforementioned mushrooms were in play. I jumped out a window. Howard: Why did you jump out a window?

Harry: I was high.

Howard: Did you think it'd be cool to jump out a window?

Harry: I don't know that I thought it'd be cool...

Howard: What were you thinking?

Harry: I don't know. So, I jumped out a window, and I hit my chin on my knee. And I bit like, the end of my tongue off.

Howard: And has it grown back? What happened?

Robyn: Grown back? What is he, a snake?

Harry: What I would say is, when I was a kid I had like, a speech impediment. And sometimes, if I'm really tired, I can feel my mouth get lazy, and I get like a small lisp, and... it's gone. Bit the little extra bit off.

Howard: And when you recorded the album was there blood gushing out of—

Harry: It was bleeding quite heavily at the time. Robyn: What do you do about a bitten tongue? Harry: It wasn't a lot—it was like, a little bit [of his tongue]. It was pretty painful, but it's okay now.

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I'm including this bit because I’ve seen quite a few people talk about this incident like it’s some sort of drug-fueled nightmare, as if Harry was completely off the rails. In reality, he did a stupid thing while high—like almost every other twentysomething at some point. You don’t even need to be high to pull this kind of idiocy; plenty of drunk (and sober!) people do things just as reckless.

What’s particularly interesting is that many of the fans who criticize Harry for the tongue incident are the same ones who support Louis—who, let’s not forget, broke his arm so badly he needed surgery and a cast for weeks because he decided to run while drunk (and, presumably, also high). And Louis did this at almost 31, in the middle of promoting his album, when he had to perform and do scheduled fan signings. Harry was 24 and on a break. Neither incident is that big of a deal, at the end of the day, they only hurt themselves, but if I had to choose which one was worse...

Interestingly, in this same interview, Harry also alluded to one of the reasons he managed to avoid using cocaine when he was younger. Here it is:

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Howard: I didn't understand that part of your life where you were on The X Factor, you got famous, you were in the band—One Direction—you guys had hit songs. It's all blowing up and everything, but yet, you moved in with James Corden's manager or something.

Harry: Yeah, his executive producer.

Howard: What's that guy's name?

Harry: Ben Winston.

Howard: You're good friends with James, right?

Harry: Yeah.

Howard: He seems like a decent guy. I've had him on the show a few times.

Harry: Yeah, couple times, right?

Howard: And James's manager and you become friends, and instead of you saying, "Hey, I'll go live in a hotel," or, "I've got some money now—I can certainly get my own place," you moved into this guy's attic. What the fuck was going on there? What were you thinking? Were you lonely and you wanted to be around this guy?

Harry: I was just really tight with money, and I didn't wanna get a hotel.

Howard: No, but seriously. I would think—was that just you trying to hold on to something normal?

Harry: Well, Ben was making a documentary with the band, and we'd met a couple of times. He tells the story about me asking to move in with him, and I cannot believe that I would have the gall to ask him after only spending a couple of days with him, so I'm pretty sure he offered. But I was moving—I’d got a house in his area, like five minutes from his place, and I'd moved out from my last place. I basically had, like, two weeks where I was gonna do some painting and stuff in the house, and the painting turned into ripping the insides out—the full thing. So, I moved in for a planned two weeks, and I'd never met his wife. We'd met for coffee just so I'd met her and stuff. And yeah, two weeks just turned into eighteen months.

Howard: So you turned to the wife and you go, "Listen, I'm gonna move into your attic"? Here you are in a big band, One Direction, you're a success, and you're living in some dude's attic.

Harry: So I lived in the little suburbs, yeah. It was great. When I moved in, they'd only just recently moved in. There was nothing really in the attic, so I just kind of took my mattress from my flat and threw it on the floor in the attic. And I had that for about—maybe like nine months—and then I actually got a bed. It was great. I feel like for me, it was probably the best move I've ever made. I'd moved away from my family, so I had, like, some feeling of family. We never really talked about work. So, I'd go and play, like, a show in Brazil and come home and sit and watch TV with them. And if I was ill—

Howard: And you didn't feel uncomfortable? And if you were ill, they would take care of you?

Harry: No. [He didn’t feel uncomfortable.] Yeah, if I was ill and they were working, Ben's mum would come around and bring me some soup.

Howard: Well, people are really nice to you. I had the complete opposite life. When I was sick, nobody took care of me. And no one was letting me in their attic, I'm telling you.

Harry: I feel also—I'd moved to London, I was in the band, we're traveling, and suddenly, there's no rules. And even as simple as—they have a Kosher house, so I'd moved in and didn't really get it. And the first week, I ordered a pepperoni pizza. And they made me sit on the bench outside to eat it. So, I'm sitting outside, and it was freezing cold, and I was like, "I don't think I'm gonna be able to eat bacon while I'm here."

Howard: Maybe you were desirous—I mean, I'm getting psychological here—but maybe you were desirous of—now that you could have anything you wanted in the world, in a sense—you had money, you had fame, there were women, there's all kinds of… whatever you want—here were people willing to set up rules and say no to you.

Harry: Yeah. And I think—some of them were their rules, and some of them were self-enforced. I moved in with them right at the time when I started going out in London and drinking, and you could go into bars and little members' clubs and get hammered, and then go home. I think so many of those parties in London, there's like that 2 AM cut-off where half the party goes upstairs to do cocaine, and half of them leave. And you're thrown into this thing, and I'm like, "I don't know his wife well enough to go back off my face, so I should go home." You know? I feel like it was probably the best thing that ever happened to me.

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Harry is being extremely frank about the fact that he likely faced a lot more temptation and may have even found it impossible to stick to his self-promise to not "be the guy that fucks it up" if he hadn't had Ben and Meredith’s support system.

Despite the fact that Harry is explicitly clear about not doing drugs while in 1D, why he made that decision, and even the key reason he was able to stick to it, a lot of people still analyze the size of his pupils in pictures (particularly in very dark photos) to decide he’s lying and was actually a cokehead. Or they use the fact that he went out clubbing and got drunk as proof. Essentially, it's based on absolutely nothing but vibes and a shoddy understanding of biology.

I’m strictly talking about the 1D era here because he states it as a fact: no drugs while in 1D. And yet, people affirm he did it anyway.

He fully admits that he started experimenting once he went solo. In fact, without mentioning drugs specifically, he touched on how he felt free after going solo in his Better Homes & Gardens interview in 2022:

Styles said he often spent interviews terrified about saying the wrong thing until he stopped to question what abhorrent belief or bizarre opinion he was scared he'd accidentally reveal and realized he couldn't think of anything. He thought about how, when good things happened—say, a No. 1 album—he wouldn't feel happy, just relieved. And he thought about the cleanliness clauses in the contracts he used to sign, which would dictate that they would be null and void if he did anything supposedly unsavory, and about how terrified that used to make him. And about when he signed his solo contract and learned that the ability to make music would not be affected by personal transgressions, he burst into tears, a reaction he still seemed shocked by, retelling it to me now, years later. "I felt free," he explained.

This is a sentiment he has been expressing for years. Here’s another excerpt from his 2019 Rolling Stone interview:

It’s strange to hear him talk about shedding his anxieties and doubts, since he’s always come across as one of the planet’s most confident people. “While I was in the band,” he says, “I was constantly scared I might sing a wrong note. I felt so much weight in terms of not getting things wrong. I remember when I signed my record deal and I asked my manager, ‘What happens if I get arrested? Does it mean the contract is null and void?’ Now, I feel like the fans have given me an environment to be myself and grow up and create this safe space to learn and make mistakes.”

So yes, as a fully grown adult in the entertainment industry—after spending his late teens and early twenties terrified that he'd do or say the wrong thing—he experimented with drugs once he went solo.

He’s openly admitted to using shrooms and edibles. As for weed, he specifically said he doesn’t do it (from the same Howard Stern interview as before):

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Howard: You don't do weed, though? You drink a little, you do shrooms? Harry: No. [He doesn't like weed.] I drink a little bit—I don't drink a lot. Weed makes me tired, and I don't like smoking. And I don't do mushrooms all the time, just to be clear. I don't do 'em when I'm working or anything

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So, he's tried it, but he doesn’t like it. Seems pretty straightforward to me.

Harry has also been very clear about being completely sober while on tour. He first mentioned this in his 2022 interview with Zane Lowe.

"I'm pretty strict while I'm on tour anyway. I don't drink and I go straight to sleep and all of that kind of stuff. Kind of the opposite of what everyone thinks I'm doing after a show."

He expanded on it in his second Howard Stern interview a couple of weeks later.

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Howard: You make sure that you get a minimum of 10 hours of sleep while touring, and I thought you would have a perspective on this. When you read about rockstars and the excess of the past—like, guys would go on tour, they're banging everything they meet, they're staying up all night. You know, you read about the legendary parties, like Led Zeppelin, The Who. Can you imagine how a lead singer could get through a tour doing all of that crazy crap? It's not possible. You're young, and you need that 10 hours of sleep.

Harry: Yeah, I mean, I just can't do it. Drinking and stuff just dehydrates my voice so much, you know? It'd be really freeing if I could have a night out and then do a show the next day, but I just can't. And I think knowing that I can't is just easier. I did it once, and it was my least favorite show I've ever done, because I felt like it was so bad. And I feel like, even on the run of shows that you do, I feel like you owe it to whoever's coming. Even if it's our 40th show, 90th show, or whatever, I think it's—for most people in the audience, it's the first show. So it kinda feels like, if that's the sacrifice I have to make, I'm kind of okay with it.

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And then he said it again later that same year in his third Rolling Stone cover interview.

Styles has found himself enamored with routine on the road: 10 hours of sleep a night, IV injections pumping him with nutrients and vitamins, a strict acid-reflux-conscious diet that cuts out coffee, alcohol, and certain foods that affect the throat 50,000 fans are depending on. Last night, he slept with two humidifiers that apparently made it look like he was stepping out of a steam room when he opened his hotel-room door.

The one show he mentioned on Stern (which I also pointed out in my Fine Line analysis) is likely his DC show in 2018. This means that, since going solo, the man went out before a show exactly once. We don't know when he cut off drinking, coffee, and all that, of course, but it seems like he's been health-conscious from the start, with his mindfulness growing as time went on.

The fact that he spends weeks, even months, at a time not drinking a drop of alcohol, not going out, not doing drugs (and he explicitly stated multiple times that he doesn't do mushrooms while working), kind of completely eradicates the idea that he could be addicted to literally anything.

Addicts can't just stop cold turkey for months at a time. They're dependent on the substance.

What some of these people will argue: "He's probably just lying." How does that even make sense? He offered the information. All of it. The mushrooms, the edibles, the drinking, the not drinking, the 10 hours of sleep—everything. He brought it up every single time. He didn't have to. He chose to.

This is a man who will waffle about the weather for an hour to avoid saying something he doesn't want to say. He didn't stumble into revealing this information. He decided he was comfortable sharing it, so he did. Which probably means he doesn't have anything to hide on this topic—otherwise, why the fuck would he bring attention to it in the first place?

What have other people said about Harry and drugs?

Because these idiots refuse to believe his own word, spoken frankly, live on camera, let's hear what other people have said.

This is what Ben Winston, who, remember, hosted him in his attic for 18 months between the ages of 18 and 20, said in 2017:

You wonder how a young musician might find his way here, to these lofty peaks, with his head still attached to his shoulders. No sex tapes, no TMZ meltdowns, no tell-all books written by the rehab nanny? In a world where one messy scandal can get you five seasons of a hit reality show …  how did Harry Styles slip through the juggernaut? “Family,” answers Ben Winston. “It comes from his mom, Anne. She brought him and his sister up incredibly well. Harry would choose boring over exciting … There is more chance of me going to Mars next week than there is of Harry having some sort of addiction.”

That is a BOLD thing to say. And to be clear, I disagree. I don’t have to have met Harry to know that anyone can fall into addiction. No one is exempt. We should all be extremely respectful of substances for this very reason.

It’s obvious Harry has a good head on his shoulders. He’s explicitly brought up not using substances as an escape multiple times. He has a loving family, a strong support system of older, more settled friends who have offered him a home when he’s away from home, and a mindset that prioritizes health and professionalism. The fact that he actively chose therapy, that he wants to stay healthy, that he takes his work seriously—all of these things are mitigating factors. They reduce the risk, but the risk is never zero. And that’s something worth acknowledging.

That said, the fact that his then 36-year-old friend—who had been in the industry for decades and had lived with him—said that? That’s incredibly telling.

But you know what else is telling? You know who else has commented on Harry’s relationship with drugs?

The one and only Louis Tomlinson.

HARRY STYLES’S admission about biting the tip of his tongue off during a mushroom trip came as a ‘surprise’ to Louis — as he was always the one being told off for being One Direction’s tearaway stoner. Recalling his days of hedonism, Louis proudly boasted he is actually the natural born rebel who has done his ‘fair bit’ of sex, drugs and rock’n’roll. ‘I am not going to lie. I was pretty surprised to see the whole mushroom thing with Harry. I always used to get told off for smoking joints,’ he said. ‘But anyway… there are some people who want to be known as that guy — wild, crazy, whatever… there are some people that just are.’

I know his fans will do everything in their power to pretend they don’t understand what he’s saying here, but he’s being extremely clear. He was the wild one. He was the one who partied and did drugs. Not Harry.

In fact, he’s taking a subtle jab—"some people who want to be known as..."—implying that Harry’s mushroom story isn’t true or is at least exaggerated. That Harry is saying it because he wants to be seen that way, whereas Louis actually was that way. There’s no other reasonable interpretation of his words.

On the other hand, he’s also claiming that he was “told off” for smoking weed. Why would he bring that up while expressing his surprise that Harry admitted to doing shrooms? Why else, if not because he felt judged by Harry?

Now, go back to what Harry said about “not wanting to be the one who fucks it up.” It aligns perfectly.

You know what else aligns perfectly?

In May 2014, a video of Louis and Zayn smoking weed while on tour in South America was leaked. It quickly sparked controversy. At the time, weed wasn’t legal in most places and was still seen as taboo. On top of that, 1D had a very young audience and was touring through several conservative countries, so it actually was a big deal.

The Philippines, in particular, made a fuss. So did Peru (where the video was filmed). There was even talk about them being banned from the U.S.

After the leak, The Sun published this:

There’s no way to actually read the story because, as I’ve said before, in late 2014, The Sun revamped their website. In the process, they deleted most of their older articles and added a paywall.

For articles published before 2014, you can usually find archived versions in the Wayback Machine. But for articles from 2014 itself? This is what you get:

We can still find other articles that echo the story, thankfully. Here’s Arizona Central citing it:

The One Direction hunk's bandmates were captured on film joking about smoking marijuana as they passed around a suspicious-looking roll-up cigarette as they were reportedly being taken to Peru's Estadio Nacional in Lima on April 27, and Harry is said to be unimpressed by their antics, which were reportedly filmed on Louis' phone. A source told The Sun newspaper: ''Harry is annoyed about the whole debacle. This should be one of the biggest weeks of the band's career with the launch of their U.K. stadium tour. ''Instead it has been taken over by this controversy. Harry thinks it was a stupid and reckless thing for Louis to allow to be filmed in the first place.'' The footage emerged Wednesday while the group are in the midst of the U.K. leg of their 'Where We Are Tour' and the remaining members of One Direction - Harry, Niall Horan and Liam Payne - were not present in the short clip. Harry has distanced himself from their behavior and has even been traveling separately to his bandmates since he isn't ''into these antics''. The insider added: ''Despite Harry's reputation, he's incredibly professional and mature, and not into these sorts of antics.''

Louis: "I was told off for smoking a joint."

Harry: "I was scared about saying or doing the wrong thing. I didn't want to be the one to fuck up the band, so I stayed away from all of it."

The Sun: "Harry was annoyed that Louis and Zayn were going to fuck up the band."

Larries will, of course, act like this was some kind of elaborate scheme planned half a decade in advance and that, actually, Harry was smoking weed right alongside Zouis! The proof? That he stood next to them and smiled.

(Literally. They used to post pictures of Harry/Zayn/Louis smiling in each other's vicinity, even if they weren't interacting, as "evidence" that all was good.)

And, of course, Harry tweeting lyrics that seemed to maybe allude to what happened.

The video leaked the next day, and they’d surely been given a heads-up. And after the part that Harry tweeted, the lyrics go, “and then we'll take it higher.” So, yeah, it’s very possible this was an allusion to that. I wouldn’t say it’s conclusive, but possible? Sure.

Does that mean he was okay with it? Ummmm, no? He could’ve been extremely frustrated and still tweeted that. There’s literally no correlation whatsoever. What was he gonna do? Bash their heads in with a hammer? Never smile in their direction again? He probably yelled a little, threw some stuff around, and dropped it. It was out of his control, and it wasn’t his responsibility.

The fact that, all those years later, Louis was still upset about it is just ridiculous. Harry had every right to be annoyed at their carelessness. The man spent five years terrified of saying or doing the wrong thing, getting scolded for the most innocuous stuff. He probably felt an even greater share of the pressure to not mess up because of the level of attention he got. And then two of his bandmates just… film themselves smoking weed—for absolutely no reason—and it leaks. I think anyone would be frustrated.

I don’t think Harry would’ve told them off for smoking weed in general. I seriously doubt it. Harry literally went to parties where people were doing cocaine at 2 AM—he said that outright. I can't picture a 19-year-old Harry getting on his bandmates' case about this kind of thing. But I do absolutely believe he was pissed off about how stupid it was to film themselves doing it. And honestly, he had every right to be.

But ANYWAY, Louis, in his attempt to throw shade at Harry, actually validated everything Harry said.

What do Harry's lyrics say about drugs?

Harry has alluded to drugs or drug use in at least three songs, possibly four, depending on interpretation.

The first one is Kiwi, from his self-titled debut album:

It's New York, baby, always jacked up (Hey) Holland Tunnel for a nose, it's always backed up When she's alone, she goes home to a cactus (Uh) In a black dress, she's such an actress

It's a beautiful turn of phrase, I have to say. The allusion to drug use in Kiwi is almost judgmental. It's certainly not about Harry himself, but rather about a woman he's heavily criticizing. He even subtly calls her stupid.

The only other song on this first album where he alludes to another substance is Meet Me In The Hallway, where he says "give me some morphine." But morphine is generally not used as a recreational drug—it's typically used for pain relief in terminal cancer patients.

Harry’s stepdad, Robin, was struggling with an advanced form of cancer when he wrote this album. Harry confirmed that another song, Ever Since New York, was about finding out bad news about a family member. Additionally, the back cover of the album features a robin bird in his honor, which is the same bird Gemma, Harry’s sister, would later get tattooed.

My guess has always been that MMITH was about Robin’s fight with cancer, which he would ultimately lose in June 2017 (a month after the album was released).

There are also no allusions to drugs in Fine Line. People have tried to claim that Watermelon Sugar is about drugs, but, uh, no. It’s about cunnilingus. Harry has been extremely clear about that. The word "high" in the song is not referring to drugs. It’s a play on "sugar high," as in hyperglycemia... literally, high blood sugar. He’s saying her pussy is so sweet that he got a sugar high.

The other allusions to drugs are in Harry’s House, two of which are explicit, and one that a lot of people believe is there, but I personally don’t think it is.

The first one (second overall) is in Daylight:

I'm on the roof You're in your airplane seat I was nose-bleedin' Looking for life out there Readin' your horoscope You were just doing cocaine in my kitchen You never listen I hope you're missing me by now

He's not the one doing cocaine in this allusion. He’s noting that she is doing cocaine in his kitchen. Of course, it's still an allusion to drugs. Some people connect him saying "I was nose-bleeding" to her doing cocaine because cocaine use can sometimes cause nosebleeds.

However, I think he's just using clever wording. "Nosebleeds" are also the seats at the highest point in a concert or sporting venue. If he's on the roof, then he’s literally "nose-bleeding." It’s possibly referring to both—her drug use and the literal nosebleed seats.

The second allusion (third overall) is in Keep Driving:

Passports in foot wells Kiss her and don't tells Wine glass, puff pass Tea with cyborgs Riot America Science and edibles Life hacks going viral in the bathroom Cocaine, side boob Choke her with a sea view Toothache, bad move Just act normal Moka pot Monday It's all good Hey, you

What does it mean? Who the hell knows. Is he the one doing the cocaine? Maybe. Maybe it's the owner of the sideboob. Maybe the owner of the sideboob is the same woman who was doing cocaine in his kitchen.

That's the thing: since we don’t know exactly who these songs are about, we can’t say for sure that he's not writing about a specific person who has a particular habit that, in some way, affected their relationship. It's not only possible, it's likely.

The third possible allusion (fourth overall) would be in Satellite:

You got a new life Am I bothering you? Do you wanna talk? We share the last line Then we drink the wall till we wanna talk

Some people interpret “we share the last line” as a reference to the last line of cocaine. Is it possible that he's referring to it? Yes, absolutely.

I personally am not convinced, not because I don't think he does cocaine (I'll get to that), but because I think this song is about Olivia Wilde, and I don’t really see Harry and Olivia making a habit out of sharing lines of coke. It's certainly not impossible, but I find it unlikely.

Why do I think this song is about Olivia? Well, Harry mentioned the different stages in which he wrote Harry's House. The first part was in Shangri-La in May/June 2020 (Malibu, CA), then in Real World in the fall of 2020 (Bath, England), followed by sessions at Henson and The Cave Studios in late 2020/early 2021 (Los Angeles, CA) during breaks from filming Don't Worry Darling. The final part took place in Angelic Studios and Rob Stringer's living room in Oxford in the spring of 2021 (near London).

Satellite was recorded in Henson, The Cave, and Angelic Studios, placing the song firmly in the later part of the album's production—when Harry was in LA filming DWD and right before he started filming My Policeman in Brighton.

It only makes sense that if Harry was starting to see someone new at the time, he wrote about it. Olivia had recently separated from her fiancé and the father of her children. The song says both that the person he's singing about has “a new life” and that he “can tell you’re lonely down there.” The juxtaposition of someone having a new life but still feeling lonely fits perfectly with someone who just ended a long-term relationship and is perhaps hesitant to start a new one. Harry is waiting for her to decide whether to give them a chance.

In that context, and given the fact that Olivia was his director, the interpretation of “share the last line” being about a script rather than cocaine makes more sense to me.

At the end of the day, we don’t know. He could still be talking about cocaine. My interpretation could be wrong, and the song could be about someone else. It's always important to realize that we don’t know him, and everything we say is interpretation.

Bonus: Medicine

Some people believe he's alluding to drugs in this song. I'm sorry, but that's just poor text interpretation. While I always acknowledge that I can't know for a fact if I'm right or wrong about this kind of stuff, I'm willing to bet good money on being right about this.

Medicine is an unreleased song he wrote for his self-titled album that he occasionally sings live, in case anyone is still reading this and living under a rock.

In my opinion, this is a metaphor where he turns on its head the idea that queerness is a disease that needs to be cured. The song seems to explore his own sexuality, where he figures out he's not straight, then accepts it.

“I figured out I kind of like it” and “the boys and the girls are in, I mess around with them, and I’m okay with it” are extremely telling lyrics. He's literally figuring it out and deciding he’s okay with it. It can’t be more on the nose. This isn’t subtext or interpretation.

Saying that being with a man, figuring out he’s into men, etc., is his "Medicine" is simply the opposite of what society told us about homosexuality for centuries. Homosexuality used to be in the DSM-5 (the book that catalogs all types of mental disorders). If you think he’s alluding to drugs here, you're an idiot.

Interpretation

Considering the allusions in his lyrics, do I think Harry has tried cocaine? Most likely. He explicitly mentioned that he started experimenting with new things after going solo.

If he decided to experiment with drugs, then given the industry he's in and how commonplace cocaine is, it’s almost a given that he’s tried it and used it occasionally. It's also likely that he's tried ketamine, particularly since he lives in London.

However, his lyrics are not evidence of addiction or even a regular habit. They’re definitely not evidence of him using crack, as I’ve seen some people claim on Twitter recently. Jesus Christ.

In my opinion, his lyrics seem to reference a specific person in his life who used cocaine. Why do I think that? Because he sings about her doing it in his kitchen—which is a pretty specific and unusual setting. Doing cocaine in a kitchen suggests a heavier habit than just casual partying, and it clearly impacted him enough to write about it

The lyrics of Keep Driving also seem to connect with another unreleased song of his, Make My Day.

I make lots of money, build a big house Put an extra sink in, say I’ll settle down Friends call me a loner, I know they’re wrong She asked me to choke her, I play along

This song suggests that the lyrics of Keep Driving ("choke her with a sea view") might not be as kinky as they're often interpreted, but instead quite sad. They seem to speak of a relationship built around sex, despite Harry wanting something deeper. In my Fine Line lyric analysis, I discuss how this could reflect his relationship with Camille. Whether these songs are specifically about her, I can't say for sure, but it seems possible.

Keep Driving was partially recorded at Shangri-La, which, as I mentioned earlier, indicates it was part of the first batch of songs written in May 2020. The same goes for Daylight. It's entirely possible that Harry was still processing his breakup with Camille at that point, especially since, as far as we know, he hadn’t had a serious relationship since their split two years earlier. It's also possible they're about someoene else we don't know about.

In anu case, I don't think these lyrics suggest that Harry himself is a heavy or even a regular drug user at all.

Difference between mushrooms and cocaine

One thing that really irritated me was people using Harry's admission of taking mushrooms as some sort of evidence that he does cocaine.

There is a HUGE difference between soft drugs, like mushrooms and edibles, and heavy drugs like cocaine. Let’s break it down:

ADDICTION:

Mushrooms and edibles are not physically addictive. This means your body doesn’t develop a chemical dependency on them. While it is possible to develop a psychological dependence, that typically requires frequent, long-term use. For most people, these substances are not a gateway to addiction.

Cocaine, however, is highly addictive. It creates a physical dependency in the body, and this can develop quickly, often without the user even realizing it. Cocaine triggers the brain's reward system in a way that makes it very easy for the body to crave it, leading to both mental and physical addiction.

LIFE RISK:

Mushrooms and edibles generally do not pose a significant threat to your life. Overdosing on them is extremely rare, and even in large quantities, they are not lethal. While they can cause unpleasant experiences, physical danger is minimal.

Cocaine, on the other hand, carries a high risk of overdose and death. Even a single line can be fatal, depending on how it’s cut and what it's laced with (for example, the lethal addition of fentanyl). The risk of accidental overdose with cocaine is significant, and it can have immediate, deadly consequences.

BODILY HARM:

Mushrooms and edibles are generally not harmful to your body. The primary risk is having a bad trip, which is why it's reassuring that Harry mentioned being cautious about his mindset when using them. As long as the user is in a safe, controlled environment, physical harm is unlikely.

Cocaine, however, can cause severe bodily harm. It can lead to heart attacks, strokes, or other serious complications, particularly depending on a person’s genetic predispositions, which may be dormant and undetected. Even a single line, not cut with anything (more) dangerous, can be life-threatening.

LONG-TERM EFFECTS:

Mushrooms and edibles are extremely unlikely to cause long-term damage to your brain cells. For that to happen, you'd have to be a heavy user or careless with how you use them. In general, their effects on the brain are minimal and reversible.

Cocaine, on the other hand, is highly likely to cause long-term damage to your brain cells. Chronic use can lead to cognitive impairment, affecting memory, decision-making, and other mental functions. The more you use, the greater the risk of lasting damage.

LEGALIZATION:

Edibles, being a form of marijuana, have been legalized for both recreational and medicinal use in several countries and states, with more likely to follow suit as the trend grows.

Mushrooms, while not yet fully legalized, have gained increasing acceptance for their medicinal use, particularly in the treatment of mental health conditions, and we may see more progress on this front in the future.

Cocaine, however, is not and will likely never be legalized anywhere due to its highly addictive nature and the severe health risks it poses.

Now, take everything I just explained about cocaine, amplify it by about 1,000, and that’s what crack does to your body and brain. The damage is far more extreme and devastating. So, calling Harry a "crackhead" for doing mushrooms is not just ridiculous—it’s completely out of touch with the reality of what crack actually does to a person.

These are just a few of the key differences. If you honestly believe that Harry sharing a story about tripping on mushrooms is some sort of confession about being a crackhead, you seriously need to do one of two things: grow up and read a few books, or get treatment for those brainworms ASAP.

Stop conflating things. It’s not only ignorant, but it’s also dangerous. Harry has never openly discussed doing cocaine, and he's certainly not glorifying it in his lyrics. The context in which he mentions drugs doesn't equate to promoting harmful substances.

Hypocrisy

What really grinds my gears is the sheer hypocrisy from certain fandoms that have been going on and on about this lately.

If you're a fan of Louis Tomlinson and you’ve decided to use "your fav is a cokehead" as some kind of insult, you’re a fucking asshole. Louis' 18-year-old sister, Félicité, tragically passed away from a cocaine overdose in 2019. How in the world can you use that to try and tear someone else down? What do you think Louis would feel if he saw "cokehead" being used as an insult towards anyone?

And, just to add salt to the wound, let’s not forget that Louis' other sister, Lottie, has had her own struggles with drugs like coke/ketamine..

Understand this: it’s not an insult. A lot of people do drugs recreationally. Sure, it’s dangerous, but if you take precautions, if you do it sparingly, I don’t know… personally, I’d prefer people didn’t, but I’m not here to police anyone’s choices. I don’t see it as a moral failure. You're an adult, and ultimately, it’s your body. Do what you want with it.

But when we’re talking about those who can’t handle it, those who have fallen into addiction… it’s even less of an insult. Addiction isn’t a choice, it’s a mental illness. Have some fucking compassion.

Louis’ friend just died because he was trying to escape through a balcony while incredibly high on multiple drugs. It’s heartbreaking.

In fact, Louis himself seems to have dabbled in heavy drugs, at least occasionally.

In the 2014 weed video that was leaked, Louis repeatedly mentions that they’ve arranged for “chicken in Chile.”

Now, "chicken" is slang for a kilo, specifically in reference to heavy drugs like crack or cocaine. It’s not something you'd use for weed. I really don’t want to link to Urban Dictionary, but the definition of "chicken" as it relates to drugs predates the weed video, so it’s pretty clear.

Some people tried to claim that he was talking about a “chicken” of weed, but that’s just ridiculous. No one calls a kilo of weed “chicken.”

Do I think Louis was planning on going through a whole kilo of cocaine? Absolutely not. A dealer might buy a kilo if they’re selling a lot, but a regular user would have no idea what to do with that much. The typical way of buying cocaine is an eight ball, which is 3.5 grams. A kilo contains around 286 eight balls—like, that’s insane. Unless they were planning on supplying all of Santiago for the weekend...

And it’s not like they could just take a kilo across the border, so it would end up lasting them for a while. For context, a kilo of weed would also be ridiculous. A blunt typically uses about 2 grams, so I highly doubt they were planning on going through 500 blunts in two days.

My guess is that Louis was just joking about the amount. But "chicken" is slang reserved for hard drugs, specifically cocaine or crack. The rapper Future even has an entire song called Chicken where he talks about "that pure 'caine."

The most common drug referred to as chicken is crack, followed by cocaine. I’m leaning towards giving Louis the benefit of the doubt and assuming he meant cocaine here.

As for Zayn, he was celebrating the "chicken in Chile," so...

He’s also known for being a heavy marijuana user, and reports suggest he was even dropped by his label due to the strength and frequency of his usage. While marijuana isn't physically addictive and typically doesn’t cause harm, it can lead to psychological dependence with frequent use. The reports could be inaccurate, of course, but considering the existence of these rumors and the fact that Zayn was let go by his label, it feels a bit hypocritical to be pointing fingers at others for drug use.

In January 2021, he was also caught on an Instagram live at 6 AM, smoking weed and blasting music while his baby was only four months old, and he and Gigi were very much together. While he’s entitled to do whatever he wants, it does seem a bit hypocritical to criticize others for their habits when this kind of behavior is being publicized.

It's also hypocritical because both Louis and Zayn have alluded to heavy drugs in their lyrics.

Zayn's Good Years, for instance:

Too much drugs and alcohol What the hell were we fighting for? 'Cause now the whole damn world will know That we're too numb and just too dumb to change the story Neither one, one of us wants to say we're sorry

This song quite literally references him (and presumably Louis, who this song seems to be about) doing too many drugs. It's pretty straightforward in its message. And considering Zayn's relationship with weed and what it's like to use it, it's extremely unlikely he's referring to weed when he talks about "drugs."

Louis also has an entire song about drugs killing his mind, and he said so explicitly:

"Kill My Mind is a song about having fun and doing silly things when you’re younger. It’s about going through an experimental phase in your youth and doing things that might not be good for you, but they are exciting!"

And he might call it "silly things" but considering the lyrics of Kill My Mind are:

And you hate me, and I want more

I can ease the pain Just a little taste, babe

And ya won't let go of your hold on me

You kill my mind Raise my body back to life And I don't know what I'd do without you now

I'd be concerned if I was a fan of his. He's literally admitting that drugs have a hold on him.

So I ask, once again, what's with the accusatory finger?

Evidence

Is there any evidence that Harry is "a cokehead"? Absolutely not.

Zooming in on his pupils and trying to use that as evidence is poor biology. Harry has green eyes, and big pupils are just a natural characteristic for him. In fact, his pupils are almost fully dilated in many pictures of him as a child:

I mean, these people are even capable of claiming that he was a crackhead when he was 5 months old.

Moreover, many times people zoom in on his pupils in photos taken with flash. In those cases, the background is dark, but the flash temporarily illuminates the scene. This causes his pupils to dilate, as that's just a natural response to low light.

Take this photo, for example, which was taken with flash. The ambiance is completely dark. If his pupils weren’t dilated in this context, that would actually be a more concerning sign of potential drug use, since opioids (such as heroin) cause something called pinpoint pupils.

Also, alcohol can cause dilated pupils as much as cocaine. Stop diagnosing people with a drug addiction over photos of their eyes, fucking Christ.

But let’s take this a step further: Harry is a health-conscious person who recently ran a marathon (42 kilometers) in 3 hours and 24 minutes. That’s almost an hour faster than the average time for an amateur male runner.

It would be physically impossible for him to run a marathon, let alone finish with that time, if he were regularly using heavy drugs.

I’m not exaggerating, and you don’t have to take my word for it. According to River Oaks Treatment Center:

They also say:

Exercise puts additional stress on the cardiovascular system. The combined effects of cocaine and vigorous exercise may be very dangerous, even in athletes who are young and seemingly healthy. Athletes who use cocaine prior to working out may suffer not only heart attacks but stroke, heat stroke, and rhabdomyolysis (a potentially fatal breakdown of the proteins of damaged muscle tissue into the blood).

Let's now cite California Recovery Center:

Cocaine is one of the stimulant drugs that increase energy and alertness. Unfortunately, using this drug can harm an athlete’s health and career in sports. These may include: Physical Effects: Numerous physical effects are harmful to the body, such as increased heart rate and blood pressure, which can reduce endurance and impair performance. It can also cause dehydration which can lead to fatigue and cramping. It can also disrupt sleep, which is essential for athletic recovery and performance.   

An article by ESPN:

"Competitive athletics increases the potential of cocaine's powerful adverse cardiovascular stimulating effects," according to Wadler, "namely, life-threatening abnormal heart rhythms and heart attacks, particularly in cigarette smokers." The list of adverse health effects of cocaine is long and affects many organ systems of the body. These effects include: - Strokes - Convulsions and seizures - Chronic headaches - Tremulousness and twitching - Chronic irritation of nasal membranes including perforation of the nasal septum - Abnormal vision including blindness - Elevated blood pressure and pulse - Sudden death

A regular cocaine user would find it nearly impossible to finish a marathon, let alone complete one with that time. Point blank. If Harry does use cocaine, it would likely be very, very sparingly.

Another thing I've seen is people referencing Harry taking "coke breaks" during his shows because… he goes to the toilet… to pee…

His shows are 90 minutes long. If you think he’s far gone enough to need a bump mid-show, you’re a fucking idiot. That level of addiction is extreme.

He just ran a fucking marathon for over 3 hours. Clearly, he can manage a 90-minute show without needing drugs.

We’ve seen him come back from bathroom breaks with his fly open. I can’t believe I even have to type this down.

The man drinks a gallon of water in front of our eyes. Of course, he needs to pee! Have you ever tried running up and down while having a full bladder? Look at that massive bottle, almost empty. He has several water bottles around the stage.

Harry didn’t just run a marathon in a great time; he’s also incredibly active in other sports. He regularly cycles everywhere, does cold water swimming, pilates, lifts weights, practices yoga, and plays both football (soccer) and tennis. YOU CANNOT DO THAT MUCH PHYSICAL ACTIVITY LONG-TERM IF YOU'RE A COKE ADDICT.

Furthermore, coke addicts typically lose muscle mass and find it difficult to gain muscle. Harry may not be a bodybuilder, but he has a solid amount of muscle with no signs of muscle loss.

Go ahead and look up known cocaine addicts. Take a look at their appearance—there’s one well-known example that you can look up. I won't post photos out of respect.

And I'm going to close with this:

Addiction is very hard to miss. The signs are everywhere if you're paying attention.

Take Liam, for example. He had to cancel his tour because of his addiction and was hospitalized multiple times. His speech became slurred, his jaw would twitch, and his eyes were often unfocused in interviews. His attitudes and behavior were visibly affected, and he openly admitted parts of his struggle.

Yesterday, it finally came, a sunny afternoon

What came? A sunny afternoon… good weather, positive mood, warmth, joy

I was on my way to buy some flowers for you (ooh) Thought that we could hide away in a corner of the heath

Okay he’s in a good mood and wants to share it, do something sweet and thoughtful

There's never been someone who's so perfect for me But I got over it and I said "Give me somethin' old and red" I pay for it more than I did back then

So he’s never felt better but he wants to go back to something old, something that hurts him to go back to, something he pays for, he got over feeling like someone’s perfect for him, why? To go back to pain,

hmm two interpretations, one is this happy go lucky daydream world he lives in with the you he buys flowers for and now he’s going back to what he’s comfortable with… reality, “while he plays pretend” back to playing pretend,

that or he’s met someone new but he goes back to what he knows, old and red, something that has been established and he pays for it, what? Waiting on this person, sabotaging new connections because of this one he’s waiting for, the idealization and excitement about someone new and he just “got over it”

There's just no gettin' through Without you A bottle of rouge Just me and you

Getting through what? Playing pretend? He needs alcohol to deal with being away from them, does he feel them with him when he’s drinking wine?

Sittin' in the garden, I'm a couple glasses in, I was tryna count up all the places we've been, You're always there, so don't overthink, I'm so over whites and pinks

If they’re always there with him, then they’ve been all the places he has. He’s saying I’m over lighter and sweeter wines, I want something with more body, flavor, time. To me it’s him saying, I’m ready for the real thing, I want a deep relationship, not casual easy things, you’re always with me so don’t worry or think about the other stuff, what you see, I’m over that anyway, nothing to be worried about

The grape juice blues

He’s feeling sad and lonely and he’s drinking and thinking about love, he’s thinking about what he wants

Now sure maybe it is about wine, totally, from a 3D level, but from a higher perspective it’s basically him saying you’ve always been with me, I don’t want anyone else, I’m waiting, I’m ready.