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What i look like after posting a fic

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How it felt reading smut for the first time
.į.į masterlist: nameless older bf fics
ā” early morning road trip (sfw) ā” lazy morning, lazy mouth (18+) ā” got your bible, got your gun (sfw) ā” winding down (18+) ā” misbehaved (sfw) ā” inexperienced (18+) ā” in heat, literally (18+) ā” sleepy (18+) ā” one bad decision (18+) ā” sinful (18+) ā” first time (18+) ā” bruised knees (nsfw) ā” secret admirer (sfw) ā” time and place (sfw) ā” his bunny (sfw) ā” tired out (18+) ā” drive-in date (sfw) ā” perfect neighbour (sfw) ā” eating you (18+) ā” a christmas party (18+) ā” making a mess (18+) ā” helpin' you (18+) ā” older!bf headcanons (sfw + 18+) ā” crying during sex (18+) ā” comin' home (18+) ā” disobedient (18+) ā” birthday girl (18+) ā” after care (18+) ā” too rough (18+) ā” desperate (18+) ā” picking you up (18+) ā” good student (18+)
Series + longer fics
ā” mom's boyfriend part 1 (18+) ā” mom's boyfriend part 2 (18+)
Reading @kissthigh at night with your headphones on and Lana del Rey playing is a spiritual awakening
Callin' Him ąØą§
Summary: One night, you decide to call up Beau Arlen, your dadās best friend, because you miss him while youāre at college. The conversation quickly turns different.Ā ā” warnings: NSFW, MDNI, 18+, smut, phone-sex, dbf!beau arlen, age gap, descriptions of sex, virgin!user, teasing, beau has a thing for uniforms ahaha, guided masturbation (f + m), talking you through it, user is 23, no mentions of y/n, reader-insert. wc: 2.4k | i miss writing for him. So much.
āWhyāre you callinā me, sweetheart?ā
The voice is quiet over the line, just a smooth Southern accent that rings in your ears. You grin to yourself, biting your lip, shifting your hips against your dorm room bed, and you gaze at the ceiling of the empty room.
Your roommate was gone for the weekend, finally, leaving you alone to do whatever you wanted, and your mind had drifted to one idea only: calling Beau Arlen, your dadās best friend, who was only a couple hundred miles away because youāre currently shipped off to college.Ā
āI donāt know⦠I miss you,ā you admit quietly to him, listening to him sigh to himself. āItās been weeks since I last saw you⦠wonāt see you until the holidays,ā you mumble, holding your phone close to your ear.
Beauās sitting at the desk in his office, rubbing his hand over his scruff, his green eyes scanning over unfinished paperwork. He was working a late shift and stopped the minute your name appeared on his phone, your fatherās name in brackets beside it. He sighed and answered, knowing you were probably up to no good.Ā
āMiss me, huh?ā he asks, leaning back in the leather chair, glancing out of the glass windows, and out at the rest of the station; empty, all of the employees had already gone home.
āYeahā¦ā you nod despite the fact he canāt see it, and you shift against your bed again. āWhy? You donāt miss me?ā you ask, and he can hear the smile curled into your lips.Ā
āāCourse I miss you, sweetheart,ā Beau sighs, resting his free hand on his thigh. āJusā donāt know why youāre callinā me so late,ā he shakes his head, his tongue poking into his cheek.
āI just told you, I miss you,ā you laugh softly, and you lift one leg out of boredom, gazing at your black tights. āItās weird being away from home,ā you explain further, listening to the silence.
āI know,ā he drawls quietly, shifting his hips. āWhatāre you doinā over there?ā
āJust⦠in my bed,ā you shrug, groaning when you adjust against the blankets. āMy roommate left for the weekend; itās all boring,ā you mumble, and heās tipping his head back.
Beau is trying to act like he canāt hear the soft ruffling of the bedsheets and blankets, or the way you breathe heavier, the soft grunts and groans when you roll around slightly. He sighs.
āWhy aināt you call your daddy? Friends?ā Beau questions, his lips drawling into a thin line, waiting for your excuse.
āWanted to talk to you instead,ā you admit, biting your lip, and he goes quiet.
āOver your friends, huh?ā Beau asks, and you can hear the smile in his voice now. āReal sweet of you, darlinā,ā he grins, gazing down at his lap, blinking at the zipper of his jeans.
āMhm, real sweet,ā you reply softly, turning your head to gaze at the dorm door, then back up at the ceiling. āMy uniform isnāt comfy,ā you tell him, shifting your hips against the bed, sighing.
Beau swallows hard.
Your uniform? His head drifts to an area he doesnāt want to think about right now: the skirt youāre probably wearing, the white button-up, the black tights. He reaches down, pressing his hand down against the front of his jeans, his palm lightly brushing his denim.
āWearinā a uniform?ā he chuckles, shaking his head. āWhat? You goinā to some private school?ā
āI am,ā you mumble, biting your lip. āYou know my daddy⦠wants the best for me, even if thatās spending a couple grand at some private school where Iām forced into a uniform at almost twenty-four,ā you giggle, and he laughs along, nodding.
āWhatās it look like?ā Beau asks quietly, his free hand sliding up to scratch his beard instead. āCanāt be too bad, sweetheart,ā he drawls, brushing off the perverted curiosity as a genuine concern about how your body feels wrapped up in nylon and cotton.
āOh, itās bad,ā you laugh, gazing down at the silly uniform youāre still in. āPlaid skirt, white button-up, tights, a tieā¦ā You drawl out, and you hear him sigh, and you smile.
āHuh,ā he mumbles across the line, looking at his lap again. āAnd youāre still in it?ā he asks, his eyes focused on his zipper, feeling how hard he is getting behind it.
āYeah,ā you whisper, like itās a secret. āFinished my last lecture like forty minutes ago⦠just crashed when I got back to my room,ā you explain, nodding.
Beau is experiencing every emotion right now: guilt, confusion, and arousal. Heās trying his hardest not to picture you right now; sprawled out on your bed, your skirt riding up, your legs covered in the sheer tights, and how exhausted you must be, how he should be there, relieving all of that stress from exams and studying.
āMust be an exhausted girl,ā he drawls out, tipping his head back when he realizes that unfortunate sexual tone slipping through. āWorkinā your ass off all day,ā he adds, his hand sliding back down to the front of his jeans.
āMhm, I am,ā you agree, and you look down at the pleats on your skirt. āI know youāre working hard too⦠being a sheriff and all,ā you add, knowing how much that stupid man loved praise.
Beau chuckles. āYeah, workinā real hard, sweetheart.ā
Thereās a pause, and you shift again, and he hears it over the static line; the shuffling, the brushing, the soft breaths and sighs when you adjust your body. And heās hard. He hates himself a lot right now.
āMaybe you could come here, at some point,ā you offer, breathing in. āLike⦠you know, could show you my campus,ā you explain, and he squints.
āWhere am I gonna stay, darlinā?ā Beau asks, swinging the leather office chair back and forth. āCanāt be stayinā with you in your room,ā he adds, and god, you wish he could.
āMotel,ā you mumble, looking at the clock. āI could stay there, too,ā you add, holding your breath.
Thereās another pause at the thought; you and Beau staying at a motel together, doing god knows whatāmaybe indulging in the fantasies youāve both been having about each other since you last saw each other.Ā
āYeah,ā Beau mumbles, swallowing hard. āMaybe.ā
āWhy maybe?ā You ask quietly, lifting your hips. āI want to see you,ā you whisper, like someone else is listening over the line.
āCāmon, sweetheart,ā he whispers and shakes his head, clicking his tongue. āWhatāre we gonna do in that motel room, huh? Talk?ā He asks, and you giggle.
āYeah,ā you say innocently, crossing your legs. āWe can talk,ā you agree, and he rubs his hand over his beard again.
āWe aināt gonna be talkinā in that motel,ā Beau shakes his head, sighing heavily.Ā
āWhat will we be doing then?ā You ask, shifting your hips, feeling that dull ache growing between your thighs, and heās already lightly palming himself through his jeans.
āFuckinā,ā he says plainly, that Texan drawl suddenly coming out thicker, and your eyes widen, your lips parting in surprise. He was always so blunt, but right now it hit harder.
āReally?ā You ask quietly, biting your lip. āYou wanna take my virginity?ā You question, swallowing hard.Ā
You hear Beau curse under his breath, clearly reacting to the thought of taking your virginity in some seedy motel; your soft body beneath him, the soft whines and cries that heād hear from you. He looks at the office door again.Ā
āYeah, baby,ā he mumbles, blinking slowly, trying not to groan over the line as he palms himself. āIāll take your virginity,ā he agrees, licking his lips.
You go quiet now and squeeze your thighs together, your eyes shutting at the thought; his strong body, all of those thick muscles on top of you, sweaty and warm, his longer, shaggy hair, those green eyes. God, youāve never wanted a man this bad, not in your life.
āPlease,ā is all you whisper over the line, and it hits him in the gut, and he presses down harder, the heel of his palm driving into the front of his jeans.
āIāll fuck you, sweetheart,ā Beau groans out, his hand lightly working now, focusing on soothing that ache. āYouāll like it too; moaninā and whininā, trustinā me,ā he tells you, and you almost whine.Ā
Your eyes stay shut as you slide your hand down your stomach, bypassing the waistband of your skirt and sliding down. If only he knew what yoy were up to.
āYou aināt even on birth control, or nothinā,ā he shakes his head, that risk and thrill making his own eyes close. āWould be such... a risk, sweetheart, Jesus Christ,ā he mumbles, shaking his head again.
āI donāt care,ā you whisper, sliding your hand down, gently cupping yourself through your cotton underwear. āBeau⦠Beau, I donāt care,ā you whine into the line, and he already knows what youāre doing.
āYou touchinā yourself, aināt you?ā Beau suddenly asks, and all you can do is whine in responseāhis body goes still, and he groans, his own thick thighs squeezing together.Ā
He listens to your soft breaths as you rub the heel of your palm against your clit through your underwear, and heās doing the same action, just through his denim jeans. Itās the hottest thing ever, and you both barely know what youāre doing right now.Ā
āTouchinā yourself to my voice, aināt that the sweetest thing ever,ā he lightly teases, and you tip your head back, not moaning, just letting out a heavy breath. āThink about what I can really do to you.ā
You are; thatās all your mind can think about: his body against yours, his thrusts, his relentless hips, all of it wrapped up in the heat of a motel room on a weekend. Youāre getting off more than youād like to, and you rut in your hand, lightly grinding.
āBendinā you over⦠holdinā that pretty hair, maybe makinā you look in the mirrorāheard the way you were talkinā about yourself, how you donāt think youāre pretty or nothinā. Iād show you how pretty you are,ā Beau rambles on, and you whimper, swallowing back hard.
You donāt know how itās possible, but youāre already closeāitās a feeling thatās so foreign; feeling good, because of your hand and Beauās voice. Youāre used to trying to think of him, trying to picture hands and fingers, and the way heād speak to you, and heās doing it right, over the fucking phone.Ā
āYouād look so fuckinā pretty; exhausted and sweatinā, that soft skin, glisteninā, your hair a mess⦠you aināt know how much I think about you, baby,ā he continues, feeling himself just getting close to you. āCan feel you⦠hear you, sweetheart; that voice, those whines, Iād make you feel so good,ā he promises, and you feel dizzy.
Beau just hearing your soft whines and gasps over the line is enough to get him going, the thought of you in your uniform, squirming around, lightly begging him to keep going without asking. Heād do everything for you.
Itās his best friendās daughter heās speaking to with that sharp voice, all deep and drawn out, and the fact he knows youāre doing yourself too. Itās all too much for the both of you.
āTell me how youāre touchinā yourself,ā Beau lightly commands, his eyes closing, and he pants. āCāmon, darlinā,ā he encourages, his hips pathetically bucking into his palm.
āJust⦠through⦠through my underwear,ā you whisper and nod, trying to hold the phone to your ear still. āWith⦠with my palm, just my palm,ā you babble, and the thought makes him curse.
āTwo fingers, baby,ā he tells you, trying to picture it in his head. āSlide āem in that underwear, against your clit, sweetheart⦠slow circles, baby, nothinā too quick,ā he directs, and you groan, nodding, head tipped back.
You do exactly what he says; your fingers slide beyond the waistband of your underwear, right into the front of them, placing the pads of your fingers against your bare clit, no friction or restraint from the fabric. You moan softly, moving in the slow circles, just like he asked.
āYeah? Feelinā good, aināt you? Movinā those little fingers against your body, good girl,ā Beau mumbles, listening to the soft sound of your breaths picking up, along with the moans. āAll wet, too? Bet you are, thinkinā about me stuffinā you with my cock.ā
āMhm⦠mhm, really⦠wet,ā you admit, nodding quickly, your back curling and arching off the bed. āPlease, Beau,ā you plead, and he knows what you want; you wanna hear his thoughts, what heās thinking, what he wants, what heād do to you.
āOh, darlinā,ā he groans, still palming himself through his jeans, his eyes closed. āJusā wish I was there to fuck you right now⦠against that bed of yours,ā he tells you, imagining how obscene it would be to do in a god damn dorm room.Ā
Your fingers are moving quickly, using his words to help strengthen your imagination, and youāre basking in it more than youād like to; itās all much for you, and youāre shifting your hips around, helplessly grinding into the tips of your fingers.
āIād cum in you too,ā Beau adds on, grunting when he realizes his words were syncing up with what was going on his jeans right now. āFill up that stomach⦠stretchinā you out, forcinā it all in you, god,ā he moans, feeling himself spill into his boxers, right in the middle of his fucking office.
āPlease⦠please cum in me,ā is all you plead, right before you feel it. You finish, just as quickly as he does.
Itās in your underwear too, all over the soft fabric, and right into your skirt and glistening on your fingertips. Youāre both panting over the line, breaths in sync like youāre actually together, touching and talking to each other. You donāt speak; neither of you do. Itās just a silent acknowledgement of how both of you are just as pathetic for each other.
That silence hangs, both of you staring up at the ceiling in the empty rooms, wondering what the fuck happened.

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Mom's Boyfriend pt.2 ąØą§
Summary: Itās only gotten worse, and you swear youāre addicted to this sick routine the two of you have created. Itās only going to get worse, and it becomes as plain as day that the more you do it, the more you both give in. ā” warnings: NSFW, MDNI, 18+, smut, grinding, thigh riding, making out, practice kissing, mentions of vibrators and sex, lots of praise, lots of dirty talk, taboo relationship, age gap (user is 23), lying, secret relationship, he rlly came in his pants, teasing, flirting, sexual tension, no mentions of y/n, reader-insert. wc: 4.2 k | of course there will be a part 3; I would not leave u guys hanging with that ending...
It was just one time in the truck; your hips against his thigh, helplessly grinding, whining and begging to cum. But it bloomed into something both of you didnāt want to admit, a sick routine you both adapted to and hid from your mother.
Every damn day it happened. Sometimes it was in the truck, or the couch when your mother wasnāt home, your bedroom when she was, one time on the backyard step when you told him you were needy. Just the grinding on his thigh, no sex, and thatās what he hated.
Something inside of you said it was better; just grinding on his thigh, nothing more. Sometimes kissing when it was done, but your clothes were always on, and he was always happy to do it. But it was getting hard, and you were addicted.
The first ounce of pleasure you felt in your life, and it was from humping your momās boyfriendās thigh, and it was the filthiest secret you had. And you loved it.
āBaby,ā he whispers to you softly, his eyes gazing up at you. āWe⦠we can do more than this, you know?ā
Youāre too busy focusing on the movement of your hips, your eyes shut in bliss, and heās staring at you; your head tipped back, lips parted, soft moans slipping by, and heās gazing at the front door. It was another night when your mom wasnāt home, and you found yourself on the couch with him, sliding into his lap like it was nothing, letting it slip into something it wasn't supposed to be.
āI⦠I like this, though,ā you say to him quietly, your hips never stuttering. āDonāt you?ā You ask softly, tilting your head to the side.
āCourseā I do, sweetheart,ā he whispers again, massaging your hips, but heās currently struggling to hold back. āWouldnāt it be nice⦠if I made you feel even better?ā He prompts, and you swallow hard.
The idea of sex is foreignācompletely crossing a boundary your mother didnāt even have to place, just a basic rule of thumb; you donāt fuck your momās boyfriend. Though you could see it in his eyes, how it tore him apart, unable to get off himself, meanwhile you took and took and took.
āMhmā¦ā you nod a little, stopping the grinding. āI donāt even⦠know how to kiss yet,ā you tell him, showing him how much of a jump sex is.
āI can teach you that too, sweetheart,ā he reassures, nodding. āWhat weāre doing right now⦠itās nice, baby, but we can do more,ā he tells you.
āI know,ā you mumble, nodding again, stopping your hips. āIām nervous, though,ā you whisper, blinking slowly.
āYeah, I know,ā he nods, lifting a hand to run through your hair. āYou have to trust me, though, yeah?ā
āI do,ā you tell him, and you look around the living room, your eyes finding his again.
Heās staring at you, eyes soft, but you know thereās a need lingering behind them, an undeniable want for something that he canāt have, not from you, at least. It makes him sick that he craves it from you so bad; wanting to touch you, to make you cum, to kiss you and teach you how to, to take your fucking virginity.Ā
The minute a pair of headlights shoot into the dimly lit living room, you immediately crawl off him, right onto the couch cushion beside himāyour mom was home, already back from dinner with her coworkers. Your heart is pounding in your chest, and youāre wearing something that you definitely wouldnāt wear around someone youāre not trying to seduce; just underwear and a short t-shirt, and the front door shifts open before you can even cover up.
The scene looks like something from a dollhouse, the two of you frozen in place, and a random movie playing on the television. Your mother is exhausted, and she shuts the door, then throws down her purse and shoes. She walks into the living room, her eyes sweeping over the two of you, then she turns her head to the side.
āYou two watching a movie?ā she asks in a slight surprise, smiling at her boyfriend. āWhat is it?ā
āJust somethinā random,ā he recovers and looks up at her, patting the spot beside himāyouāre sitting on the other end, your legs awkwardly huddled up and pushed against your chest.
Your mother sits down with a groan, immediately curling into her boyfriend, and you look over, feeling jealousy settle in behind your chest. You grit your teeth and turn to the screen, sighing loud enough for him to look over at you. Youāre pouting, and he sees it.Ā
āHoney,ā your mother says, looking over at you, her head against his chest. āWanna give us some alone time? Youāre always around,ā she shoots, and you grimace at her words, pointing to the television.
āIāve been⦠been watching the movie,ā you shake your head, glancing at him beside her, and heās not stepping in. āI want to finish it,ā you add.
āWell, you can watch the rerun in an hour or so,ā she counters, nuzzling closer into him, and that gesture alone makes you want to leave. āWe would like to be alone.ā
You look at her boyfriend for some support, maybe a defence, but heās reaching for his whisky glass and taking a long sip, his arm around her shoulders, keeping her close.
āFine,ā you mumble, shaking your head.
You stand up off the couch and leave the living room, your mom's eyes narrowing at your outfit. She didnāt like you prancing around the house like that, just in your underwear and a T-shirt, her boyfriend right there. She looks at him and nuzzles her head beneath his chin.
āShe needs a job,ā your mother mumbles to him, and she can hear you slam the door. āGet her out of the house⦠away from you, us,ā she mumbles.
He shrugs. āSheās⦠just adjusting to the new place; there arenāt many places to work.ā
āYou work from home,ā she states, eyes flicking up to him. āI work at the clinic⦠she needs money; she just keeps going to you,ā she shakes her head, gazing at the television.
āI donāt mind,ā he shakes his head too, his eyes focused on the television. āSheās young, give her a break.ā
āWhat has gotten into you?ā She asks, sitting up a bit more, turning to her boyfriend. āYou keep defending herāsheās ungrateful, sheās a bitch that leeches off of us, mostly me, and doesnāt pay a cent,ā she spits.
āHey, calm down,ā he coos, staring at her, lips parted, realizing that his clear adoration for you slipped out. āI know how I was at her age, baby⦠sheās doing good, give her time,ā she says softly, reaching to pull her back in.
Your mom leans into him again, pressing her head against his chest and sighing.
āI guess,ā she mutters, running her tongue over her teeth. āI just have a long shift tomorrowāpossibly a double, might be up for twenty-four fuckinā hours.ā
āAnd when you get homeā¦ā he drawls, hinting at something that would make you vomit.
Your mom laughs a little and shakes her head, finding amusement in his charmāyou clearly find it in it too.
āI love you,ā she mutters, tilting her head to look at him.Ā
āLove you more,ā he says, smiling as he leans down to press against her lips.
The two of them look back to the television, and he carefully rests his hand against his jeans, his thigh. His lips part casually when he presses his palm to the denimāitās damp, a warm wet spot left by you. His eyes quickly drop, and there it is: a darkened spot, his jeans slightly bluer from it. He shifts awkwardly and looks over his shoulder at your bedroom door.Ā
āNo, I donāt knowā¦. I think he likes me,ā you mumble into the phone line, leaning against your headboard, your finger wrapped around the cord. āHe just⦠keeps going back to his girlfriend for whatever reason.ā
āI donāt think he likes you that much, then,ā your friend says, laughing over the phone. āHe keeps wanting sex and you just⦠wanna make out?ā
āWell⦠I feel like having sex is crossing some line,ā you mutter, glancing over at your nightstand. āYou know? If we just⦠make out, then itās not anything wrong.ā
āHeās probably with his girlfriend so he has access to sex,ā she says, laughing again. āAnd then⦠goes to you, when heās bored or something.ā
You sigh dramatically and look up at the ceiling, the state of the conversation making you ill; lying to your best friend about the whole situation, leaving out the fact it was about your mom and her boyfriend, and that you actually just wanted to grind on his thigh all fucking day, not make out.
āI need to sleep,ā you grumble into the phone, glancing at the digital clock, and then to your bedroom door. āIāll talk to you tomorrow.ā
The phone call ends, and you place it back on your bedside table, slinking down to rest your head against the pillow. You stare at the ceiling and turn your head, soft eyes staring at the closed door. You blink and pull yourself out of bed, opening up your bedroom door and poking your head out.
The bedroom door down the hallway is closed, the light turned off, but the kitchen light lingers. You slide out and pad down the hallway, and there he is; heās standing over the sink, a glass of water in hand, and heās taking pills. You smile, glancing over your shoulder, mentally checking off that your mother is asleep.
āSleepyhead, whatāre you doinā?ā he asks as he turns around, his eyes on your figure. āGet to sleep, itās late,ā he mumbles, crossing his arms and leaning against the counter.
āYou knowā¦ā you mumble with a smile, and heās scoffing, shaking his head.
āYou did not just get out of bed to ask me for somethinā,ā he clicks his tongue, sighing.
āI was never asleep,ā you deny, looking over your shoulder again. āI was on the phone.ā
āYeah? With who?ā he asks, tipping his head back slightly, head tipping to the side.
āMy friend,ā you tell him, walking quietly across the tile floor. āWhy?ā
āNot a boyfriend?ā he questions, eyes narrowed.
āNo,ā you shake your head, stopping right before him.
He lifts his hand and threads his fingers through your hair again, pushing the strands back. When he pulls away, his thumb gently scrapes your chin, and he settles his hand on the edge of the sink.
āI was thinking,ā you mumble, shyly looking down at your bare feet. āI want you to take my virginity.ā
When you look up at him, heās rubbing his scruff, his breathing rigid. You blink, clearly seeing the way he reacted to your words, and he looks back at you, shaking his head.
āBaby,ā he mumbles, gazing down at you. āCanāt just tell me things like that when your mom is just down the damn hallway,ā he shakes his head, leaning back into the counter.Ā
āYouāre the one who brought it up!ā You giggle, and he smiles, running his tongue over his lips.
āYeah, hours ago, when you were ridinā my thigh,ā he shrugs, his eyes gazing down at your shirt, not noticing the colour that just flooded your cheeks.
āWhatās the difference?ā You quip, a knit forming between your eyebrows.
āThe difference isā¦ā he mumbles, glancing over at the stove. āItās twelve in the morninā, and you need to sleep.ā
You tip your head back, groaning in frustration, and heās smiling at the little outburst. Your neck is stretched back, unmarked and begging for some. He swallows hard, shifting on his feet.
āCan you at least⦠tuck me in, or something?ā you smile, and he chuckles, rolling his eyes.
āHow old are you again?ā He asks, grinning.
āOld enough,ā you respond, and he looks past you and down the hall; your mom is sound asleep, and then he finds you again. He gestures for you to walk.Ā
You bite your lip, and he follows you down the hallway, carefully creeping into your bedroom, and he shuts the door behind you, locking it with a soft click. Your room is dim, just your nightstand lamp buzzing, and he glances at your bed; the stuffed animals, your pretty floral bedding.
āJust here to tuck you in, right?ā He asks, watching the way you climb onto the bed and lie on top of the blankets.
āMhm,ā you nod, and he saunters towards you, sitting on the edge of the bed, reaching down and pressing his hand against your forehead.
āWhat am I gonna do with you?ā He whispers, his thumb rubbing your hairline. āMaking me lose my fuckinā mind,ā he smiles, shaking his head.
āYeah⦠mine too,ā you almost pout, and he bites the inside of his cheek.Ā
āHow?ā He asks, his thumb rubbing between your eyebrows.
āYou act like Iām a ghost⦠when sheās around,ā you whisper, and he rolls his eyes, looking away.
āWhat do you want me to do, kid?ā He asks, making a sarcastic face. āCanāt be kissinā you, and doinā the stuff we normally do.ā
āI donāt know,ā you groan, tipping your head back in frustration. āAttention.ā
āI give you more attention than you know what to do with,ā he says, smiling as he slides his hand from your forehead to your neck. āYouāre just sayinā stuff.ā
āIs she gone tomorrow?ā You ask softly, and he purses his lips, nodding.
āWorkinā a double, actually,ā he explains.
āThat meansā¦ā You giggle, biting your lip.
āYeah,ā he breathes out, his free hand rubbing his thigh through his jeans. āWe can.ā
A silence fills your bedroom, and you look away from him, blinking slowly, breathing a little heavier at the thought of probably being alone for more than twelve hours. It feels good, knowing you two would have the entire house, everywhere, to do whatever the hell you wanted. It was a dangerous idea, but you basked in it.Ā
āTeach me how to kiss,ā you mumble, shifting and looking up at him again, and he pats your head.
āTomorrow,ā he dismisses, slowly standing up off your bed, and the wooden frame groans in relief.Ā
āNow,ā you demand, and he freezes, looking over his shoulder at you. āPlease.ā
Youāre sitting on that bed, all wide eyes, not an ounce of sleep on your face, and he sighs, turning back around. He approaches you with a slow, short walk, and he doesnāt hesitate; his hand finds your chin, and he tips it back, leaning forward and pressing his lips against yours.
Itās warm, all bitter whisky, and soft lips, his rough fingertips touching your soft skin. Your eyes close, and your lips part, an invitation that makes him lightly groanāitās dangerous, and he slowly makes his way to crawl on top of you, right through your thighs.
āSlow, baby,ā he mumbles, noticing the way youāre moaning at his lips, sloppy and full of teeth.
āTrying,ā you mutter, and he smiles, one of his hands holding the side of your face, and the other one rests at your hip, gently rubbing through your underwear.
Youāre using all teeth, and heās laughing; sloppy and messy, your mouth uncoordinated, not catching up with him at all. He rubs his thumb beneath your eye, tilting his head to the side, hoping you know enough to tilt it the other way. You donāt.
āEasy, sweetheart,ā he says into your mouth, feeling how eager you are. āNo rush⦠jusā take your time,ā he whispers, nodding slowly.
His hand slides up your shirt, gently rubbing at your ribs. His palm is large, spanning most of your ribs, a gentle hold that keeps you grounded. It feels good, his hands all over you and that consistent weight.Ā
āThere⦠you go, keepinā up with me,ā he whispers, feeling the way you begin to move like him, gentle lips moving at the same pace, less teeth and more flesh.
You smile into the kiss, enjoying the praise.
āTongue,ā he mutters, and you feel it slip right in, his tongue.
It pushes past your lips and beyond your teeth, right into your mouth, and you gasp quietly. You let your tongue move against his, almost twirling, a filthy tango that has you moaning softly, and heās pressing his thumb right at where your breasts swell from your chest. You whimper.Ā
āFeels good, yeah, sweetheart?ā He asks, pulling away to kiss the side of your mouth lightly, then carefully moves along your cheek, peppering you with gentle kisses until he reaches your jawline.Ā
āMhm,ā you whisper, nodding quickly.
He begins to kiss at your jawline, moving his lips along it, and then down, dipping to the slope of your neck. Your head tips back against the sheets and blankets, and he smiles against the skin, noticing how easily you melt from him. He loves it.Ā
āThis feels real nice, doesnāt it?ā He asks you, his warm, damp lips moving, lapping up everything he can. āKissinā your neck, baby?ā
You nod quickly, biting your lip, sliding your hand up to gently cup the nape of his neck. He nuzzles his nose against the groove where your shoulder meets your neck; he kisses it next, breathing in the sweet scent he remembers from the first night you really spoke to him, all over pizza.
āMore, more, please,ā you beg him, and he huffs out a breath, shaking his head. āMore⦠please, I want more,ā you beg quietly, and he feels his gut twist.
āThis is it⦠for tonight,ā he mumbles, and he can hear the whine slip right by your lips. āJust⦠for tonight, baby.ā
āMore⦠more,ā you whine out, and heās about to cover your mouth. āPleaseāyou wanted more from me.ā
āLater,ā he groans against your neck, and you feel the light grind of his hips, the hardness straining against the front of his jeans, and now rubbing against your core.
You tip your head back, moaning the second you realize what heās doing. Itās just a test, wanting you to know what he can give you, what he will give you eventually. Itās a warm feeling, all rough and hard, pressing to the front of your cotton undies.
āEarlier,ā he mumbles into your neck, his voice deeper than usual, and your thumb lightly rubs the back of his neck. āLeft a lilā mark on my jeans, sweetheart⦠your mom was right there,ā he tells you, nodding.
āIām sorry,ā you whimper, feeling the way heās lightly grinding into you, the bed creaking quietly. āDidnātāmean to do that, I didnāt,ā you apologize.
āNo⦠no, itās okay, baby,ā he whispers, kissing up your neck and to your jawline again. āLiked feelinā it there, could smell you, even when you were in your room,ā he nods, and you whimper.
āStop,ā you plead quietly, feeling your cheeks flushing, an undeniable shyness creeping in. He knows you well.
āSo sweet, it smells,ā he tells you, and youāre swallowing hard, listening to that deep voice. āWanna taste it, soon, sweetheart,ā he whispers, nodding.
āWant you to⦠to be the first to,ā you tell him, and he groans, kissing up your jawline, moving to the other side of your jaw.
āI will,ā he mumbles, working his way down the untouched skin. āWill be the first to taste you⦠to be all inside this pretty body,ā he promises, and you squeeze your eyes shut, your nose scrunching.
You nod quickly, desperately wanting it just as much as he does. You can feel his grinds slowing down, the ache in his boxers, behind his jeans, growing and blooming into something he wishes he could fix right now. He canāt.Ā
āItāll hurt first, baby,ā he whispers, starting to walk you through what itāll feel like. āStretchinā you out, makinā room for me,ā he adds, mouthing at your neck, his hand sliding from your ribs and down to your waist, his thumb rubbing near your stomach.
Youāre squirming now, shifting your hips beneath his, and his grinds grow a little more firm, pressing his hard on right against your underwear, and you moan softly. This feels even better than the thigh ridingāslow rocks, the kiss, the hardness, his deep voice, the dirty thoughts. Youāre getting lost in it, this blissed-out feeling making you melt right into the sheets.
āFuck, sweetheart,ā he groans against you, lightly thrusting right against you, the barrier and friction making it worse. āGonna be doinā this⦠all inside of you, though, all up in here,ā he mentions, punctuating it with a press of his thumb into your lower abdomen.
Youāre panting softly and nodding quickly, your thighs spread out and sprawled out, parting right around his body; heās just moving against youāit looks like youāre having sex, both fully dressed, both moaning, and heās close. Heās so close.
Heās ashamed, more than heād like to be. He feels himself spill into his boxers, a warmth, a stickiness spreading throughout. He groans, shaking his head at himself, knowing he just came into his pants. All because he was grinding into you.
He curses quietly and pulls back away from you, gazing down at how innocent you look. You have no idea that it just happened, that he came in his pants, and he can feel it more than heād like to. Itās a humiliating feeling for him, a man usually so stoic and closed off, suddenly getting off on just a few grinds and the sound of you whining and moaning. He looks away, and you lay there quietly.
āWhat?ā You whisper to him, gently biting your lip.
āNothinā, baby,ā he mumbles, shaking his head and swallowing hard. āJusā⦠gotta stop now, yeah?ā
āWhy? I-I didnāt⦠even do my thing,ā you whimper, but thereās a completely different issue at hand, and heās pulling back from you, staring down at you.
āTomorrow, baby, we have all day,ā he reassures you, sliding his hand down to gently rub over your thigh. āPromise, gonna let you cum all over my thigh,ā he promises, nodding.
āWhy not now?ā You whine to him, but heās already pulling off you and standing up, awkwardly adjusting his belt. It left imprints on your bare thighs.
āJusā told you⦠you listen to me,ā he mumbles, his voice stern. You swallow hard and nod a little, staying there, and he nods. He steps out of the room as if he was never even there.
He flicks the bathroom light on in the shared bedroom with your mother. He unbuckles his belt and carefully pulls down his jeans, then his boxersāa completely fucking mess, all sticky and warm, on his thighs too. He tips his head back, groaning in frustration at how ahead of himself he got.Ā
When your eyes flicker open, itās because of your mom lightly knocking on your bedroom door, a few gentle taps before she walks in. Sheās beaming, a smile on her face that screams sheās not going to work, and all you want is for her to go to work.
āHoney,ā she chirps, clearly way too excited. āMelissa just called me; sheās taking both of my shifts!ā She smiles, and youāre half awake, groaning and rolling away from her.
āThat means⦠weāre doing a day tripācome on, sweetie, get outta bed,ā she tells you, vaguely mentioning a day trip with the three of you, and dread fills your stomach.Ā
You know youāre addicted to him the minute the first thought that pops into your head is wondering how youāll find time to grind on his thigh, to kiss and make out, to have sex finally. Thatās what you thought the entire day would be, and now⦠itās anything but. You whine louder when she leaves the room.
You lay there with your face buried in a plethora of stuffed animals, your eyes closed, hoping itās a dream, but itās not, and another firm knock at your bedroom door confirms it. Itās him walking in, and he shuts it behind him lightly. You roll over, and your eyes widen.
āCan weācan weāā you immediately babble, practically climbing out of bed, and he quickly shakes his head, covering his mouth with one finger, and walks towards you.Ā Ā
āNo, baby,ā he tells you quietly, looking over his shoulder again. āGonna pick out your underwear for today,ā he tells you casually, and your eyebrows furrow, lips parting.
āWhy?ā You ask, watching as he begins drifting towards your dresser.
āJusā wanna know what youāre wearinā the whole time weāre out,ā he explains, nodding slowly. āOnly weāll know.ā
He sifts through your drawer and pulls out a pair of cotton ones, placing them on the top of your dresser, eyeing the lace and the little ribbon. Heās satisfied with his choice, and looks back over at you.
āLeft somethinā with them, too,ā he tells you casually, and he slowly dips out of the bedroom, shutting the door behind him.
You yawn and rub your eyes, groaning when you stand. You move towards the dresser and see the familiar pair of underwear, then see it against them: itās small, pink, the tiniest bullet ever. Your eyes widen when you realize where this goes, and you immediately look over your shoulder.
No fucking way.
Everytime I get off tumblr 20 minutes later I end up getting back on to read. The cycle never ends
Dating ddba!Dex
frank castle masterlist
ā STANDALONES -thantophobia 𩸠-too big- šøš¶ļø (pt1) -one more inch šøš¶ļøš©ø(pt2) -softness under scarred skin šø - goddamn puppy dog eyes šø -whatchu lookin' at ? š¶ļø -teach me your ways š¶ļø -come and take a seat š¶ļø -everything but lovers𩸠-i'm still hereš©øšø -bloodstream š¶ļø 𩸠-new beginnings𩸠-bruises 𩸠-don't make me waitš¶ļø -where does it hurt ? š©øšøš¶ļø -property of frank šøš¶ļø - just sit still, frankie š¶ļø -welcome home, soldier boy šø -hold it steady šøš¶ļø -i don't share š¶ļø -love bites š©øšø -eyes on me šøš¶ļø -water works šøš¶ļø -stab wounds 𩸠-sponge 𩸠-big emotions š¶ļø -a few bruises here and there 𩸠-say my name š¶ļø -no real contact needed š¶ļø - a welcome distraction š¶ļø - suffer in silence 𩸠ā MINI SERIES ----- the fiance series------- -> till she does us part (p1)𩸠-> to have and to hold (p2)𩸠-> for better of worse (p3) š©øšøš¶ļø --------the voicemail series--------- ->leave a message after the beep 𩸠->redialing š©øšø
A Christmas Party ąØą§
Summary: Itās your first Christmas with your older boyfriend, and you decide to invite him to the family get-together, even if you arenāt the most loyal to faith anymore. Your attitude drives him crazy, and he has to deal with it. ā” warnings: NSFW, MDNI, 18+, age-gap, smut, oral sex (m!receiving), public sex, hair pulling, light slapping, pet names (kid a few times, daddy, sweetheart, etc) mock sympathy/praise, degradation/praise, breeding kink, unprotected sex, creampie, humiliation, religious themes, reader-insert, no mentions of y/n, user is 21+. wc: 6k | : this request was so cute because i love christmas but then i went overboard and made it a freak show. im sorry i love u all its long
The December air chilled right through your plaid dress, your Mary Janes pressing into the crunchy snow on the doorstep, and your boyfriend stood beside you, gently holding your hand. You were both mentally preparing for the inevitable: meeting your entire family tree.Ā
December twenty-third, just two days before Christmas, and your strict Catholic parents did it every year: hosted a large get-together at your childhood home, inviting every damn family member, each branch, people youāre sure you havenāt met before, and this year you were bringing him, your boyfriend.
Every nerve of yours was on fire, knowing how taboo the situation you were in was. Dating a man who was either closer to your fatherās age or even older wasnāt the most normal thing, especially in your family, who urged you to date a boy from your church, one of the ones who begged you to stay āpureā before being married off, only to divorce in a few years because you two were truly incompatible.
You had left the church years ago. They barely knew that; you had run off with the man beside you.
āYou nervous?ā your boyfriend mumbles quietly to you, and your eyes are fixed on the obnoxious wreath hanging outside of the door. You hesitantly nod.
āYeah⦠really nervous,ā you tell him, turning your head to gaze at him, and you want to scold him for wearing such casual attire- just a canvas jacket and some jeans; meanwhile, you stood beside him like a church girlāit was more modest than anything you ever wore.
āYouāll be fine, baby,ā he reassures, gently squeezing your cold hand, and the winter air nips at both of your necks.
Youāre about to scold him for getting the whiff of cigarettes on him, but the door swings open and your eyes widen, staring at your parents before you. Their eyes widen too, and they immediately dart their eyes towards the man beside you; tall, shaggy hair. Disapproval is evident in their gaze.
āHoney,ā your mom suddenly smiles, her neck decorated with pearls, a large cross beneath the other jewelry. āSo glad you made it⦠so glad you made it!ā she cheers, and you can smell the scent of food wafting in from the busy kitchen.
āKiddo,ā your dad chimes in, not even hesitating to pull you in by the shoulders, and your boyfriend awkwardly shuffles in behind you. āMissed you, a whole bunch.ā
āYeah⦠yeah, I missed you guys,ā you nod, and you turn to look at your boyfriend, who is standing beside you, his hand on your lower back, his eyes elsewhere.
Heās mostly looking at the decor strung around your childhood home. The crucifixes hanging in the living room, the bright lights on the railingsāit looks like Christmas threw up all over the place, and you shift on your feet, your mom helping you take off your jacket.
āAnd who is this handsome man?ā your mom beams, and you recognize that fake smile from the grocery store, the similar one she uses when sheās trying to charm the cashier into letting her use an expired coupon.
āMy boyfriend,ā you smile, and heās smiling too, and you recognize his fake smileāthe one he uses when heās about to knock the daylights out of the guy hitting on you at a bar. Itās just your fucking mother.
āItās nice to meet yaā,ā your dad joins in, holding out his hand, and your boyfriend looks at him next, taking his hand in his, giving him a firm shake and a nod.
āVery nice to meet the two of you.ā Your boyfriend nods, and your mom finds her way to him in the small front foyer, taking off his jacket. It reeks like cigarettes, and youāre pretty sure a half-empty flask is weighing it down.
āYour aunts and uncles are gonna be here soon, sweetheart,ā your mom explains, hanging up your jackets, and your dad is currently eyeing the man who could pass as his age, or maybe is his age. It would be rude to ask.
āI know,ā you mumble nervously, and your mom glances down at your outfit, smiling at the modest choice: a long plaid dress and black tights, your boyfriend smirking at the thought of you trying to dress that way when heās seen how you usually dress around him.
Thereās an awkward pause at the front door, and you swallow hard, your boyfriend shuffling closer to you, and heās placing his hand on your back again. The oven timer saves the day, and it begins beeping, signalling that more sugar cookies are ready to be taken out, and your mom grins.
āWell! You two⦠love-birds, make yourself at home,ā she smiles, nudging your dad, who is still glaring at your boyfriend and his unshaven beard. āYou know where weāll be,ā she nods.
āThanks, momā¦ā You mumble, looking up at your boyfriend, who is still giving that fake smile, and you can see your dad clenching his fist as the two of them disappear around the corner, heading into the kitchen.
āKidā¦ā your boyfriend mumbles, and you immediately nudge his waist, and heās laughing.
āStop,ā you whisper-yell through gritted teeth, looking over your shoulder after you turn to face him.
āI know you said your family is⦠weird, but Jesus Christ⦠literally,ā he shoots, and you can't help but smile at his wit, and you nod, knowing exactly what he means.
āWait until you meet the other seventy-five percent,ā you tease, and he groans, tipping his head back. āMy grandma⦠grandpa, the whole family tree,ā you shrug, and heās mentally preparing himself.
āYour outfit looks ridiculous,ā he suddenly says through a laugh, glancing down at it. āWanna take it off you,ā he says casually, and your eyes widen, cheeks flushing red.
āOkay, you canāt⦠say anything like that at all,ā you shake your head quickly and grab his hand, pulling him towards the staircase. You decide to take him up to your childhood bedroom.
His feet are heavy on the wooden staircase, and he trails behind you, glancing at the hung-up pictures and even more crucifixes nailed into the wallpaper. He scoffs under his breath, following your lead, but regretting ever saying āyesā to you dragging him here.
Your bedroom door swings open, and he looks around, an immediate smile curling into his stoic look. Itās all bright pink and childish, completely frozen in time, and heās stepping ahead of you, laughing at the sight of it.
āHavenāt changed at all, have you, baby?ā he smiles, looking at the stuffed animals neatly lined on your bed, and he recalls the many you have tucked on your shared bed back home.
āShut up,ā you scowl, shutting the door and quickly locking it.
āNo⦠no, itās adorable,ā he mumbles, his hands in his pockets as he approaches your desk, gazing down at the stacks of books and then to the bulletin board on your wall.
He squints; polaroids of you and your friends, dorky photographs of you in middle school, a few candids of you when you were just a girl, and he plucks one off of the board; you at fifteen, probably wearing the same dress you are right now.
āHuh,ā he teases, his rough thumb rubbing over the picture, and looks back at you. āJust a little thing, still are,ā he nods, and youāre quickly walking over, eyes narrowing at the photo.
āHey! Donāt touch that!ā you immediately whine, knowing how incredibly foolish you look in the picture, and he lifts his hand, completely making it unreachable. He smirks.
āStand on your tiptoes, sweetheart,ā he quips, already knowing you were, and you whine in frustration, tipping your head back to look up at the photograph above his head.
āI hate you,ā you whimper, standing flat on your feet, still wearing your black shoes. You huff.
āLook at you,ā he coos, lowering his hand and casually sliding the image into his back pocket, and then cupping your cheek. āSweet girl.ā he looks at your outfit again, smirking.
āStop doing that,ā you quietly protest, knowing his wandering eyes find your modest outfit quite amusing, and you can feel his eyes undressing you. He purposely picked out your bra and underwear today, for that exact reason.
āAdmiring my girl?ā he asks, his rough thumb rubbing over your cheekbone.
āDadā¦ā you whisper to him, looking away, and his eyebrows raise.
āWe doinā that here, kid?ā he ticks his head at the name you just called him, dad, and he canāt help but find it entertaining that youāre saying it here, your biological father just below.
You just look up at him, pouting, and he slides his thumb down to your lip, pulling at the plush flesh. He licks his own lips, unable to pull his gaze away from your innocent eyes, and he leans forward, nudging his nose against the side of your jaw.
āHey,ā you whisper, feeling him gently mouthing at the side of your neck, and you press your hand to his chest. āStop⦠my parents, come on.ā
āReally feelinā the Christmas spirit,ā he teases, pulling back from you. āGetting all Virgin Mary on me,ā he smiles, and he watches your cheeks flush in real time.
āNo⦠itās just⦠my parents would shoot me, and then you, if they walked in on this,ā you explain, and he laughs at your explanation, slapping the side of your hip. Way too loud.
āYour daddy gonna come in and kill me?ā he asks, grinning.
āYeah, probably,ā you nod, and heās back at it; his stupid hand that was on your hip, now sliding up the plaid fabric, and your eyes widen.
āFive minutes,ā he edges on, his warm palm already sliding to your tights, and youāre shaking your head. āCome on, for dad, baby,ā he presses, and youāre whining quietly to him.
The doorbell rings, and immediately your name is called, and you look at your boyfriend, who looks like cold water was just dumped on his damn head. You bite your lip, and he slides his hand out from under your plaid dress, landing a harder slap onto your hip.
āNot my fault,ā you quietly protest, and heās looking down at you, nodding towards your bedroom door again, silently telling you to lead the way. You do.
You quickly slip out of your bedroom, and heās walking closely behind, eyes focusing on the shapeless dress and the black tights heāll be ripping and tearing later on, knowing the underwear beneath it, the ones he told you to put on. He swallows hard when you walk down the stairs.
Youāre overwhelmed when you reach the bottom step; your relatives are packing into the foyer already, smiling and laughing, and you can hear the light Christmas music from the stereo system. The festive party is in full swing now, and youāre going to have to act as normal as possible.
Youāre awkwardly hugging people you barely know, and your boyfriend watches from the sidelines, looking up at the ceiling, his jaw clenched whenever he receives a disapproving scowl.
āThis is your boyfriend, sweetie?ā your aunt grins, looking at your boyfriend, whoās gazing at the older woman, nodding along with you.
āYeah⦠he is, my boyfriend,ā you mutter nervously, and you can feel your other relatives pushing around you, trying to find the living room with refreshments and snacks.
āWell⦠I know your mom wouldnāt mind being a grandma soon,ā she teases with a grin, and your cheeks suddenly flush pink, and your boyfriend subtly pinches your hip.
āIāyeah⦠maybe soon,ā you nervously laugh, shrugging and looking up at your boyfriend.
āDefinitely,ā he speaks up, swiftly sliding his hand around your waist, squeezing. āIsnāt that right, little lady?ā he grins sarcastically, and your aunt is the only person who seems to be a little forgiving.
āIāll see you around.ā Your aunt smiles and nods, turning around to join the others, and you immediately look up at your boyfriend, eyebrows furrowing in displeasure.
āDo you always have to be weird?ā you ask him, and he shrugs, his hand sliding down to squeeze your ass next, and you shift.
āIāll stop when your family stops askinā if Iām gonna give you a baby,ā he counters, and youāve never rolled your eyes harder as you pull away from him, scoffing, and walking towards the others.Ā
Your boyfriend is right behind you, two hands on your hips, lightly guiding you towards the living room where fewer people sit. Heās tapping his thumbs against your body, giving small nods to your relatives who eye him.
āCanāt believe theyāre wonderinā when Iām gonna cum in you,ā he mumbles just for you to hear, and you tense at his words, but heās right. āMaybe Iāll do it here,ā he offers, the irony making you squirm.
The two of you find an empty place on the couch in your living roomā the family room, dining room, and kitchen mostly packedāitās just you and him on the couch, the Christmas tree spinning around, ornaments glinting in the dim light. You sigh, and he parts his legs, hips lifting as he adjusts himself, a hand resting on his own thigh, the other around your shoulders.
āI wanna go home, dad,ā you mumble to him, and he smiles at the complaint, turning his head to kiss your temple.
āI know, baby,ā he mutters, kissing it again. āYouāll be fine⦠make you feel real good when we get home, yeah?ā he promises, his hand rubbing over your shoulder.
āYeah,ā you nod and turn to face him, and heās already looking at you, finding that sweet look to be absolutely heartbreaking.
āThis dress is so uncomfortable,ā you complain some more, awkwardly tugging down the fabric, and he looks down at the sheer tights, adding a dark tint to your legs. āAnd everything is too tight, and I wanna go home,ā you whine, and heās smiling, amused again.
āHow about I get us some drinks?ā he offers, nodding towards the refreshment table your mom had neatly set out, a few other little festive treats scattered throughout. āIāll be back,ā he tells you, nodding, and heās already standing up.
You watch him navigate through the crowd; his frame broad, and heās so damn tall, lightly moving through your family members who arenāt used to the strange man wandering around, and he disappears around the corner, into the abyss of your judgmental family.
He returns in just a few minutes; he holds a clear glass filled with a thick white liquid, and just a beer for himself. You squint at the drink, and he sits down with a heavy sigh.
āHere, kid,ā he tells you, handing you the drink, and you take it. āEggnog,ā he confirms, and you sniff itāit doesnāt smell like normal eggnog.
āAre you sure?ā you ask him hesitantly, staring down at the mysterious liquid, and you hold it to your nose again. āSmells⦠gross,ā you mumble.
āSpiked eggnog,ā he clarifies, already taking a pull of the cold beer. āWon't make you so anxious, and all squirmy,ā he smiles, putting his arm around your shoulder once again,
You take a swig, and it almost makes you gag, but a buzz would definitely give you some relief.Ā
Thereās something comedic about the fact that your family is fine with you drinking in their sacred house, while also disapproving of every damn thing you didāyou take a longer sip at the thought thatās pissing you off.
āFeel better, sweetheart?ā your boyfriend asks, nudging your knee with his own, and you nod, a little stain above your upper lip, and heās instantly wiping it away from you.
āTastes really bad,ā you confess, looking down at the cup resting in your lap.
āJusā drink up,ā he encourages, flashing you a grin, and he takes another sip of his beer.
The two of you sit alone in the living room, the soft sound of Christmas music still playing; a lighter chatter from your family members hums as well, and youāre dreading the second you actually have to get up and socialize, to explain that no, youāre not pregnant. No, it won't be happening anytime soon.Ā
You lean into your boyfriend a little more, nuzzling into the corner of his arm where it lifts to rest behind your shoulders, and heās mindlessly rubbing your arm, and thatās until itās calledāyeah, itās the festive dinner, and you immediately whine to him, shaking your head.
āCome on, baby,ā he whispers to you, looking over at your family members who seem to be filing into the dining room, a long table awaiting you. āGotta get some food in you,ā he adds on, shifting to the edge of the couch.Ā
āI donāt wanna,ā you complain, and he pats your upper back. āItās gonna be awkward, and⦠I feel dizzy,ā you add on, and he clenches his jaw at your childlike behaviour.
āYeah? Thatās from drinking on an empty tummy, cāmon,ā he reassures you again, and you begrudgingly stand to your feet, flattening out your plaid dress. āAtta girl.ā
Your boyfriend stands behind you as you hastily walk into the dining room, and there are far too many people for your liking; dishing out food onto their plates, laughing and cheering, drinks being poured, and he just has his hands on your hips from behind, squeezing.Ā
You somehow make it to your seats at the end of the table, and you nervously sit down in the wooden chair, glancing at the foodāyou donāt really have an appetite right now, although your boyfriend clearly does, and you scowl.
āDonāt feel good,ā you whisper to him, and your relatives across the table smile at you, and you give one in return, and then you feel it; his hand finding your thigh beneath the table.
Comforting, and unfortunately, arousing.Ā
āYou drunk, kid?ā he asks you sarcastically, turning his head to stare at you, his plate half-loaded with food, and yours empty.
āWhat? Noā¦ā You mumble, and maybe you are, just a little bit.Ā
āGet some food in your stomach,ā he directs, patting your thigh, rubbing it gently, and you shift awkwardly in the wooden chairs, aimlessly staring at him.
āDon't wanna,ā you protest, shaking your head, and he shoots you a glareāitās like youāre the needy one now, and heās not sure if he can put up with it when every relative of yours surrounds you two.Ā
Your defiance has his fingers curling into the flesh of your thigh, almost right up and into your dress that was supposed to be modest, and you take it as a hint to reach forward, grabbing a stupid dinner roll. He notices and slowly moves his hand back, but keeps it on your thigh.
It's just as awkward as before; a silence stretches between the two of you; you picking at the food you don't want to eat, and heās glancing at you, making sure you aren't throwing any more of a damn tantrum for some unknown reason. Heās rubbing your thigh still, a rough thumb grazing along the inseam of your black tights.Ā
Curious eyes glance between the two of you, and your thighs are squeezing together under the table, hidden from the family friends minding their business in front of you, and your boyfriend is too careless for your liking. Youāre picking at some carrots, hesitantly eating them, and he finally lets his hand slide right up your dress.
āHave to go to the bathroom,ā you mumble to him, placing your fork down already, and heās chewing his food, shaking his head.
āYou can hold it, kid,ā he lightly scolds, squeezing your thigh again, his thumb pressing into your skin.
āI canāt,ā you whisper, feeling your hips squirming in the chair.
āYou will,ā he mumbles, not looking at you anymore, and you pout, though he canāt see it.Ā
You lean back into the chair and away from the table, and youāre trying not to make a scene, but itās a little hard when your boyfriend is aware of the fact that you just tried to sneak out of dinner so you could hide in the bathroom. Heās still rubbing your thigh.
āReally have to go,ā you whisper to him, and his jaw stops, and he turns his head to look at you.
āGonna piss yourself if you donāt?ā he asks, an edge to his words that has you swallowing hard. You nod.
He puts his fork onto the table and stands up, and your eyes widen when he grabs your upper armāitās a little too aggressive for your familyās eyes, and youāre beyond embarrassed by the way heās maltreating you. You look up at him, and heās carefully pulling you away.
āGo to the bathroom,ā he murmurs to you, pushing you ahead of him, forcing you to lead the way.
āIāmāIām sorry,ā you mumble, looking up and over your shoulder at him, and heās clenching his jaw, and youāre quickly finding your way to the nearest bathroom.
The door shuts with a heavy click, and he discreetly locks it. You look up at him, feeling him crowd you against the sink, a familiar look in his eyes, and you whimper. He basks in it, the almost tinge of fear he can see in your innocent eyes.
āTurn around,ā he says quietly, using his finger to gesture a spin. āHands on the sink, baby,ā he tells you, and you bite your lip, hesitantly turning around, looking in the mirror.Ā
Heās immediately behind you, pressing up against your dress, his one hand gripping your hip, the other reaching up to grab a fistful of your hair. He glances at the door, and then in the mirror at your reflection; cheeks all flushed, an anxious line knitting into your brows. He smirks, looking down at the way youāre subconsciously arching your back.
āPissing me the fuck off out there,ā he mumbles to you, grabbing your hair even harder, forcing your neck back uncomfortably. āActinā like a child, whining and complaining, when you dragged me here in the first place,ā he hisses.Ā
āI-Iām sorry,ā you whimper softly, and he tugs your hair even harder, causing a soft whine to leave your mouth again.
āCanāt behave one day, not even for your real fuckinā daddy,ā he shakes his head, watching the look in your eyes in the mirror. āThen lying about havinā to piss? Real cute,ā he scoffs, using his knee to press into the back of yours, forcing you to bend awkwardly.
You groan when you lean a bit more forward against the sink, struggling to keep yourself upāhis hand is still tangled in your head, forcing your neck in a position that doesnāt feel the best. Itās not supposed to.Ā
āShouldāve made you do it at the dinner table, in front of your family,ā he mumbles, and you can feel how hard heās getting through his jeans. āMaybe itād teach you something, yeah, baby? Making you clean it up yourself too.ā
āNo⦠no,ā you shake your head, gasping when he yanks your head back, and your shoes slip on the tile floor. You hate that you like this.Ā
āYeah, thatās what I thought,ā he mumbles, digging his fingers into your hip. āMisbehave one more fuckinā time,ā he grints through his teeth, letting go of your hair and sliding his hand to your shoulder, forcing you to stand up straight.
āOkay⦠okay, sorry, I will⦠I will,ā you mumble, staring at yourself in the mirror, and then at him. His eyes are darkened and heavy.Ā
āGonna go out there and be a good girl,ā he tells you, landing a harsh slap on your hip, and you cringe at the thought of your family hearing it from the dinner table.
āMhm⦠good girl,ā you repeat, nodding, standing up straight for him.
āThere we go,ā he mumbles, pressing a kiss to your neck. āYouāre a good girl, yeah?ā
You nod some more, staring in the mirror at him.
āMmm⦠on your knees then, kid,ā he whispers, and he watches the flash of fear cover your face.
āWhat?ā you ask in disbelief, turning around to face him, and he clicks his tongue.
āOn your knees,ā he nods, lifting a hand to ruffle your head. āGonna be real quick,ā he promises.
āCome on⦠my family, dinnerā¦ā You ramble, and heās using the hand on your head to push down lightly, and you sink to your knees on the tile floor, whining in the process.
āLetās use that mouth for somethinā other than whining and complaining,ā he says, his hand reaching to undo his belt. āYeah? Good girls do that.ā
You watch his long fingers undo the clasp of his belt, letting it open before popping his button out, and then his zipper quickly following. You swallow hard, his jeans lowering down his hips just enoughāitāll be easy to slide them up, and thatās how he wants this interaction; easy and quick.Ā
āBeen a real bitch lately with that mouth,ā he tells you, his hand sliding into the front of his boxers, denim jeans down just enough. āEspecially today, with your whole fuckinā family around us, baby.ā he shakes his head, pulling himself out.Ā
āWasnāt doing anything,ā you mumble, shaking your head, and he grins at how stupid you look on your knees, wearing the most librarian clothing heās seen in a second.
āAwww, you werenāt?ā he mocks, waiting for your response.
The minute your mouth opens, he uses it as an opportunityāhe pushes right in, and your eyes squeeze shut the minute he hits the back of your throat. No warnings, no licks beforehand, just an immediate thrust, and a strong hand on the top of your head.
Youāre barely doing any of the sucking; heās just using your mouth as a hole, both of his hands holding either side of your head, using your throat just like you always let him.
āSee⦠good girl,ā he groans, his head tipping back, and drool is dripping out of your mouth and down your chin, right onto your lap and on your dress. āGood baby, cāmon,ā he mumbles, nodding.
Your noises are muffledāthe whines and the chokes barely audible, but youāre gagging, and heās realizing itās a bit louder than he expected. Itās the empty bathroom thatās making the noise louder, and he canāt help but run off it, the thought of someone opening the door.
You grasp at his thighs, holding them tightly as he relentlessly thrusts, and you just want him to finish so you can go out there. Itās not that you donāt like it, but you know your family is going to be suspicious; the both of you in the bathroom for too long.
Tears pour down your flushed cheeks, eyes glassy and begging. He stares right into them, his mouth agape, panting, in awe of how well youāre taking him. In the bathroom.
āGotta swallow for me, baby,ā he tells you, and you feel him poking the back of your throat, twitching and throbbing, ribbed veins on the flat of your tongue. Your eyes are closing.
Itās cruel; he doesnāt tell you heās close; he just cums, and your eyes shoot open in surprise, feeling the warmth at the back of your throat, filling your poor mouth, and he pulls back, and you practically slump back. You swallow.
āI know, sweetheart,ā he coos, staring down at you, and heās fixing his belt, zipping up his jeans, preparing to go back out there like itās nothing. āCome on,ā he encourages, reaching down to help you up.
You stand to your feet, all wobbly, and you glance in the mirror at yourself; red eyes and teary cheeks flush, and you move your jaw. It hurts.Ā
He doesnāt give you time to fix your messy hair or the way your dress is bunched up a little, not even time to fully wipe his cum off your fucking mouth; heās just pushing you out of the bathroom, forcing you to walk ahead first to make it less obvious the two of you left together. You walk back to the table, breathing heavier, and you take a seat.Ā
āYouāre doing well, honey?ā your aunt asks as you pass by her seat, and sheās reaching out and holding your arm. You nod.
āFood⦠didnāt sit with me right; Iām okay,ā you smile, realizing the distress on your face is more obvious than you wanted it to be. You swallow hard and sit back down in the seat, looking at the food that has gone cold. You have no appetite.Ā
Your boyfriend sits down beside you, and you tense up, sitting up a bit straighter, and you take a bite out of the dinner roll you hadnāt started yet. He looks at you from the corner of his eye, and his eyes narrow; the white splotch right on the corner of your mouth, crusting over, and he has to hold back from groaning.Ā
You stare at your plate as you slowly chew, trying to act like your boyfriend wasnāt using your mouth less than ten minutes ago, and there isnāt an ache at the back of your throat from the way he kept hitting the back of it. You clear your throat.
āYou alright, baby?ā he mutters to you, and you turn to look at him, nodding. You look like a mess; hair still ruined from the grip he had on it, and your eyes are red, glassy, pupils blown. He grinds his teeth.
āUh-huh,ā you tell him, and he slides his hand over to you, patting your stomach.
He lifts his hand and wipes away the mess on your mouth, his eyes gazing right into yours as he does it, slowly reaching over to the glass of water that was poured when the two of you were absent. He hands it to you, rubbing his thumb across your cheek when you take it from him.Ā
By the time dessert comes around, youāre slumped into the wooden chair, still a little blissed out and dizzy from what had happened in the bathroom, and your boyfriendās hand is back on your thigh, gently rubbing. He peeks over at you when plates start being taken away.
āKinda⦠wanna go to my room,ā you speak up, slowly looking over at him, and heās taking a final sip of his beer, setting it onto the table and crossing his arms.
āYour room?ā he asks with a raise of his eyebrows.
āMhm,ā you mumble, nodding, and his lips pull into a thin line.Ā
āLead the way,ā he waves for you to stand up, and you do, still wobbly, and he has to catch your hands to help escort you through the decorated house.Ā
Relatives are too busy gathering in the living room, picking over presents, and laughing at stupid jokes to notice the two of you sneaking off to your bedroom. Your parents are both a little drunk anyway, and the Christmas tunes fade as you move up the stairs again.
āGotta tell me whatās wrong, kid,ā your boyfriend says to you as he follows behind, and youāre moving into your bedroom again, and heās shutting the door, locking it once again.Ā
āYou⦠got me all⦠you knowā¦ā You shrug, walking towards your old bed. āAnd then⦠then you made me go out there!āĀ
āAh,ā he nods in understanding, quietly stalking behind you. āAll needy, yeah?ā
āYeahā¦ā you admit, your knees hitting the edge of the bed, and you look down at the sheets. āYouāre never fair,ā you shake your head, and heās creeping up, lifting a hand to gather your hair away from your neck.Ā
āIām sorry, baby,ā he whispers, but itās condescending and lacking any true care; he places a kiss to the side of your neck, hands finding your hips again. āAll squirmy at the table, yeah? Mess in your underwear?ā
You kneel a little on the bed, feeling that familiar weakness in your knees. You nod.Ā
āPoor thing,ā he coos, sliding one hand down, slowly lifting your dress a bit. āNeed daddy to take care of that ache? That tingle?ā he mutters, and you whimper, nodding again.Ā
āYes, please,ā you whisper, and heās smirking, slowly sliding up your dress a bit more.
āSee? When you behave⦠and act like a big girlā¦ā he starts smoothly, a hand guiding you down onto the bed, forcing you onto your hands and knees. ā... you get treated like a big girlāa polite one, too,ā he says.
Youāre on your hands and knees now, your childhood bed low to the ground, making it easy for your boyfriend to stand right behind youāsame position as in the bathroom; having you bent over. You look up, seeing your vanity right across from the two of you, a large mirror.
He has your dress fully bunched up now, and he smirks at the black pantyhose. Two hands rip them, and you gasp loudly at the gesture; he ruined them, and the thread is splitting even further, going down the back of your thighs, destroyed.Ā
You hear the familiar clink of his belt as it unclasps, and you whine, your head bowed, patiently waiting for him. He looks at the underwear he had picked out for you, wrapped around your hips and ass, and he hums at the sight.
āGonna have to rip these off too, huh?ā he asks, and you shake your head. He laughs.Ā
Heās already hard and throbbing in his hand, just looking at the back of you; back arching already, your hips wiggling for him, palms pressed into the floral sheets you had since you were a teen, and now youāre bent over them, waiting for him. He sucks in a breath.
His thumb pulls aside your underwear, and he doesnāt hesitate again; a firm thrust, quick and hardāitās easy when youāre as wet as you are, and he slides in.
You moan way too loudly, and he immediately leans forward, wrapping a firm palm over your mouth, but he doesnāt stop thrusting. Heās always been rough, aggressive, and it slips out more when youāre in a risky situation, like this one.Ā
Your head is tipped back again as he fucks into you from behind, your stupid dress all bunched up, one hand on your hip, the other clasped over your mouth. Heās looking in front of him at the mirror, gawking over your facial expressions; heavy eyes almost rolling back into your head, and youāre already dropping onto your forearms.
āTaught my girl well,ā he mumbles out, watching that curve of your spine, how effortlessly you slid into such a position. āSee what a little punishing does, baby?āĀ
You mindlessly nod, your body rocking with each thrust, and heās leaning over you a little more, still pressing his hand over your mouth. You can hear your family chattering downstairs, the loud laughs and hollers, and youāre getting your guts rearranged in your childhood bedroom.Ā
āLookinā so good⦠so fuckinā good,ā he groans, his hips never stalling, fingers curling into the fabric of your dress. āTrying to be all⦠modest. Just for me to fuck you like a whore,ā he practically laughs, thinking of your poor attempt at conserving yourself.Ā
You whine into his hand louder, gripping the sheets, watching a teddy bear fall right onto the ground and hit the floor. He shuffles closer to the bed, moving deeper, and your eyes roll back, and he watches it.Ā
āTakinā me perfectly, baby⦠for daddy,ā he mumbles, pounding right into you, and you're feeling it more than ever; the angle is perfect, and heās perfect, and your mind is absolutely melting.
āGonna fill you up⦠arenāt I?ā he mumbles, his hand sliding from your hip to your lower back, tracing the arch of it. āSeems like⦠whole world wants me to, kid,ā he nods, and you can do nothing but take it all.
āGet you all pregnant⦠hmm, let everyone know⦠what we do together, baby,ā he taunts, his thrusts more pronounced each time he speaks, edging you on. āWouldnāt you like that? Everyone knowinā I fill you up?ā
Your heavy eyes gaze up at the vanity, the mirror, and you see the wolfish grin curled into his lips, clearly getting off on this sick idea. You look back down into the sheets, his palm leaving a red handprint right across your face, in the open.Ā
āCāmon⦠cāmon, doll, take it,ā he grunts, moving somehow quicker, his jeans pooling at his ankles, and you can feel the way he hits deeper and deeper, no hesitation in any of his movements. It feels so good; you can feel yourself growing dizzier.
He cums before you do, and itās obvious as ever; he groans, louder than he wanted to, and his hips stall, forcing himself to bury himself right inside of you, ensuring not a drop goes to waste. Itās all inside of you, stretching you, forcing you to adjust and accommodate his load and his size. Itās embarrassing how you cum even after he stops thrusting. Somehow his words made it easy; just his voice and the thoughts were enough for your body to give, and when it does, he lands a hard slap on your hip. You yelp and lurch forward, and he collapses right on top of you, pushing himself deeper. Jesus Christ.Ā
Heās panting into the side of your neck now, hunched over you, his chest to your back, his palm sliding from your mouth and going to gather your hair, to move it from your neck.
āJusā gonna stay like this,ā he tells you, kissing lightly, soothing you. āMmm⦠my sweet baby,ā he mumbles, feeling him twitch.
Your name gets called again. Right, presents.

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AS IF YOU DIDNāT READ SMUT ALL YEAR ROUND, YOU WHOREEEEEE
Falling Behind ąØą§
ā Focusing on chemistry is making you fall behind in your literature class, and your professor wants to make that clear in the weirdest way possible.
ā” : MDNI, 18+, NSFW, older man x younger woman, reader-insert, no mention of y/n, college!au, professor love interest, age-gap, smut, masturbation, unprotected-sex, oral sex, taboo relationship, light slapping, angst, everybody is 20+.
āYouāre falling behind, I donāt know why,ā the strict voice tells you, large hands shuffling through the plethora of papers on his desk. āAt the beginning of the semester, every essay you handed in was well-written, and nowā¦ā he pauses, eyes glancing at the sheets. āYou didnāt even hand the final in. Why?ā
His office is dark, the small lamp on his desk casting a glow across the sheets, and heās looking at you, eyes narrowed, dainty glasses resting on the bridge of his nose. He never wore those when he taught his lectures, and you can tell why.Ā
Thereās a pause, your brain trying to conjure up an excuse. Heās waiting, his hand rubbing the side of his clenched jaw, an impatient gesture.
āIām not sure,ā you confess, the leather chair squeaking when you shift your weight. āChem is kind of⦠taking over my life,ā you say, laughing nervously as you push a strand of fallen hair behind your ear.
āAm I your chemistry teacher?ā he asks, his tone flat and unforgiving. āYour other courses do not have anything to do with me,ā he shakes his head, sighing quietly, long fingers sliding the papers back into the folder.
āIām sorry⦠I-I⦠Iāll get the final in, I promise,ā you plead, shifting forward to the edge of the seat, and heās currently writing something on a slip of paper.
āThese are my office hours,ā he says plainly, pressing the small sticky note onto the desk before you. āYou can talk to me during these time slots; other than that, you should be off during your own thing,ā he dismisses, leaning back into his chair.
Heās staring at you, his expression blank, his eyes showing little emotion. You canāt read him like you can read most men; heās reserved, strictly professional, and the little nod towards the door hints that he doesnāt want this to go beyond a professor-student dynamic. Itās not like you thought about him that way, anyway.Ā
āThank you, sir,ā you say quietly, retrieving your backpack and swinging it over your shoulder, keeping your head low as you walk out and shut the door with a soft click.
The commute back to your apartment is a quiet one. The pavement is glistening from the storm that just passed, the streetlamps reflecting off the stray puddles you keep stepping into with a soft, displeased grunt. Your school shoes are getting dirty, and you only find relief as you step into the complex, smiling at Mrs. Esther, an older woman who usually sat by the front door, observing, watching.
āHow did that date go, sweetheart?ā she asks you, a shaky hand holding a cigarette, and you let go of the door slightly, gazing at her wrinkled face and soft smile. She always sat there, on that bench outside the doors.Ā
āDate?ā you ask with a small laugh, eyes glancing up at the night sky as you awkwardly hold the door open.
āMhm.. last Thursday, that handsome man with the long hair,ā she says, taking a long drag of her cigarette, a complete juxtaposition to the hospital band wrapped around her wrist ā she had been there just a week ago, something about ābreathing problemsā. You were the only one to bring her flowers, she remembers.
āOh,ā you chirp, laughing a bit harder as you shake your head. āUhm.. yeah, it went fine,ā you nod, stepping aside as an older man passes through, and youāre still holding the door, feeling your arm and shoulders going numb.
āWhen I was your age⦠oh, dear God, every man I spoke to⦠wanted nothing but trouble,ā she hums, tapping her cigarette on the overflowing ashtray. āDonāt let them, darling, listen to me,ā she grins, and youāre shaking your head.
āOkay⦠thank you, Mrs. Esther,ā you mumble, sighing in relief as you shut the door behind you and groan at the heaviness of your backpack.Ā
You quickly type in the code, and the main doors open, finally allowing you to enter the apartment lobby. You make a beeline for the elevators. Itās a relief, standing quietly as it bypasses each level, and your head is leaning against the metal wall.Ā
āBitch, where the hell have you been?ā your roommate practically yells as she springs off the couch and walks towards you. She notices the exhaustion on your face: under-eye bags and mascara smeared down your lower lids.
āMy profās office,ā you mumble, slipping off the Mary Jane shoes youāre pretty sure are bleeding through your white socks. āI think he hates me, and wouldnāt mind if I died.āĀ
āItās⦠eight oāclock at night, and youāre hanging around with your professor?ā she grimaces, her eyebrows furrowing, and she wanders off towards the kitchen. āIf anyone saw that⦠theyāre gonna think youāre fucking, or worse, dating him.āĀ
āOh, my god,ā you roll your eyes as you throw your backpack onto the ground. āIf anyone knows that man, they know heās not⦠sleeping with a student, definitely not dating one either,ā you sigh, taking a seat on one of the stools near the island.
āWell, is he hot?ā she asks, standing by the fridge, scanning through the shelves that scream, āI am a broke college student who can't afford anything.āĀ
You pause and gaze down at the counter, shrugging. She notices the silence and turns around, barking out a laugh that has you tilting your head to the side.Ā
āHeās someoneās father, I hope you know that,ā you relent, and sheās cracking open a Diet Coke, shaking her head.
āOkay?ā she jokes, taking a long sip of the drink. āItās just attraction, like, it doesnāt matter,ā she explains with a shrug, resting her elbows against the granite counter. āBesides, you donāt even know if he actually has kids.ā
You sigh again, slumping in the stool as you reach into your pocket, pulling out the crumpled piece of paper, and she instantly snatches it, unravelling it.
āIs this like⦠a planned hookup?ā she teases, and you groan in distaste, grabbing the sticky note and reading it over; his office hours, and a little phone number at the bottom.
āDo you have to be a pervert?ā you ask, blinking slowly. āItās just his office hours and office number,ā you explain, tossing it back down.Ā
āMy profs have never done anything like that,ā she says, shaking her head and clicking her tongue. āI think he wants you to call him,ā she smirks, tilting her head to the side.
āYeah⦠Iām really sure,ā you give her a fake smile, and nod, and sheās lifting her hands in the air like sheās pleading guilty, laughing loudly as you stomp down the hallway and into your bedroom.Ā
Your bedroom is already a mess when you walk in; papers and textbooks are scattered across your desk, piles of clothing are on the floor, and your bed is still unmade from this morning. You cringe at the sight, moaning at the idea of tidying up any of your own mess.Ā
The chair squeaks as you sit, your eyes gazing down at your desk. You open up the folded sticky note again, glossing over the numbersāhis handwriting is neat. Perfect numbers curled with intent, the word āphoneā practically a blob. You toss it into the pile of other papers, but youāre still looking at it out of the corner of your eye.Ā
Your phone glows as you lift it. Nope, he hasnāt texted you, that stupid boy you went on a date with.
Youāre not sure what possesses you; fingers suddenly finding the phone icon, eyes looking at the sticky note, your fingertips dialling it in, typing each number in until thereās a ringtone. You cross one arm over your chest, lightly chewing on the nail of your thumb, and you wait until it stopsāa voice.
āHello?ā a deep voice drawls across the line, and itās like somebody has smacked you across the face. You called your professor at almost nine oāclock at night on your cellphone.
āUhmāhello,ā you awkwardly stutter out, covering your own mouth with your hand as you close your eyes. Youāre humiliating yourself in ways you didnāt know you possessed, and you can feel the warmth in your pink cheeks.
āIs there something you need?ā he asks, his tone flat and monotone, but deep and heavy, like you can feel his gaze despite him being God knows where, and youāre in your apartment.
āNoā¦ā You say quietly, and youāre shaking your head, looking at the ceiling. āIām⦠uhm, Iām just making sure this is your number,ā you excuse yourself, and you have to stop yourself from bursting into a fit of laughter.
āStaff directory,ā he tells you, and you can hear the faintest hint of annoyance. āGoogle it. Youāll see it, beside my name, confirming this is, in fact, my phone number,ā he adds on, and thereās a beat of silence following the pure disinterest in his voice.
āRight⦠yeah,ā you mumble, pulling the phone away from your face as if that would make the situation any better.
āHave a nice evening,ā he says politely, but hangs up almost immediately, not even letting you respond to the mess you just made.Ā
You sit there, listening to the dial tone humming in the background of your quiet bedroom. It seems merely impossible to face the man again, especially since you have to see him tomorrow, right in front of you, as he teaches you about Gothic literature and a variety of other things you won't remember.
The ceiling is a hazy mess as you lie back on your bed, feeling the weight of the world ease off your shoulders. You close your eyes, and suddenly youāre there again, sitting before him, his gaze on you from across his large desk.
You sigh, your mind playing tricks on you, skewing the interaction into a jumbled mess you know isnāt reality; his lips quirking into a smile as he looks at you, until heās walking over to you, making the effort to walk around his desk, settling right between your legs, large, careful hands gripping at your thighs.
The vision is too clear, and it feels like youāre reaching for it as you lie on your bed, but instead, you reach down, your nimble fingers bypassing the waistband of your skirt and slipping right into your underwear without hesitation. And itās all to the thought of him: his body clad in a suit, glasses discarded on the table, his tie loosely hanging around his neck after spending all day teaching, an exhausted yet hungry look on his face, finding you.
The feeling has your back arching, mouth opening to gasp his name but you hold back, drowning in the erotic scenario thatās filling your thoughts; his nose dragging along your thighs, and heās praising you in that low voice, reminding you of the good student you are, how well-displcined you are, giving you that validation you found yourself seeking elsewhere, like lousy dates on Thursday nights to fill the gaps.Ā
Your fingers work lightly against yourself, just moving in circles, your eyes closed, head tipping back. And you find yourself embarrassed by how quickly you finish. You wish it were that easy with other people, instead of helplessly guiding your ex-boyfriend for an hour and a half. Now, just the thought of your professor kissing your thighs and admiring your effort is enough to get you off. God help you.
You pant heavily, head turning to look at your desk, and you can see it, waiting, unravelled and a stupid mess; his phone number, his room number, the hours, his writing, him. Itās there, waiting for you.
Your alarm breaks the silence, and you immediately sit up, eyes darting around your bedroom, then down at yourself: your skirt and tights still on, your blouse loosely unbuttoned, and your hair a mess you do not want to clean up right now. You mustāve fallen asleep.
Scrambling around your room, you find another skirt and tights, swiftly changing into them, discarding the shameful, dirty underwear that takes you back to last night; yeah, masturbating to your professor just because you heard his voice over the phone. You want to slap yourself across the face.
You fix your hair in the elevator mirror, dragging your fingers through the strands, your backpack unzipped, your entire face a mess of old mascara and smeared lip gloss.Ā
Youāre not sure whether itās the guilt from last night or the fact that your final isnāt done, but you quickly realize youāre about to be late for class.Ā
The lecture is already in session when you walk in, a disoriented mess fumbling with your backpack, and he turns his head, looking over his shoulder, noticing the slight disturbance of your arrival. Thatās when you suddenly remember the phone call, and he resumes, presumably ignoring your entrance.
Your hands fumble with your notebook as you fish it out of your backpack, quickly pull out a pen, and try to catch up on the material you missed, but your eyes drift from the board, and youāre looking at him instead.
Tall and strong, biceps straining against the white dress shirt. He mustāve already taken his jacket off ā itās hanging loosely on the back of his chair, and he pauses, rolling up his sleeves to reveal his toned forearms and the watch tightly around his wrist. Itās only his behind, but youāre staring at it, head tilted to the side as his hair stays stiff, gel-kept in place.
āThat clear?ā he says aloud, the chalk hitting the shelf as he turns around, crossing his arms against his broad chest, leaning back against the board. āThe test will be on Thursday, no absences, clear your schedule,ā he says without concern, already dismissing a student who immediately raised their hand in protest.
You glance down at the notes you didnāt write, clearly realizing you were far more distracted than you wanted to be. You look to your left, the girl beside you having it neatly written out, glitter pen and all, and yours is a mix of words, things you mindlessly jotted down as you drooled over the damn slope of his nose whenever he turned, and the faint amount of stubble on his jaw.
The lecture is over before you can think. You look around as the students immediately leave the room, laughing loudly, and youāre stuck fumbling with your backpack, books, notebook, pen, and your thoughts.
āExcuse me,ā the low voice said suddenly, and you freeze, every hair on your body standing up. You brace for impact, turning on your heel to face your professor.
āLate,ā he says dryly, still leaning against the chalkboard. āAnd, your final⦠where is it?ā he asks, eyebrows raising slightly.
You werenāt used to this, attention. High school was a fucking breeze; teachers barely noticed you, and they were shocked when they suddenly realized you were in their class. It was easy to get out of things, lie, and misplace work you just didn't want to do. Now here he was, a professor with a class of 250, noticing you, of all people.
āI know,ā you nod, eyes gazing down at your feet.
You hear the chalkboard settle as he lifts his weight off it, and he wanders towards his desk, his eyes glossing over it before looking back at you.
āItās rude not to look at somebody when theyāre speaking to you,ā he comments, reaching for his folder full of papers, slowly putting on his jacket. āDonāt make that a habit.ā
Your lips part to say something, but heās not looking at you; heās much too focused on filling his satchel with his work, large hands placing folders neatly. You notice it; thereās not a ring on that finger, though, thatās quite irrelevant to you.
āIāll get it in tonight,ā you reassure, though you know itās a lie, and youāre pretty sure he does too.
āPunctuality is key in this course,ā he starts, long arms adjusting the bag, sliding it across his chest as he turns to look at you. āIf youāre falling behind, then youāre behind. Thatās that. Itās going to catch up to you,ā he explains, beginning to walk towards you.
He politely gestures for you to walk with him, and your heart stutters, but you follow suit, walking alongside him as he heads out of the corridors. He holds the door for you and begins walking down the hallway, keeping you by his side.
āSir, I understand,ā you explain to him, watching his large hands push open another set of doors until youāre outside again. āItās chemistry, I swear, itās not⦠Itās not like Iām a bad student,ā you plead to him, your shoes moving along the pavement.
āYouāre right, you are a good student,ā he agrees with a nod, and when you look at him, heās looking at you. You remember last night, suddenly, the stupid thoughts that filled your head, and the way you fantasized about this.
āBut, youāre falling behind,ā he states, stopping in his tracks, and you stop too, facing him on the sidewalk. The gloomy air is still, a cold breeze wrapping itself around you.
āListen,ā he starts, looking around, before his eyes land on you. āCome by my office, okay? We can talk about⦠adjusting the due date, yeah?ā he relents, leaning his head forward, his eyebrows raised.
You stand there, almost in shock. He seems oddly⦠nice, a sweet gesture rather than a harsh one, a stark contrast to the man who was in his office yesterday.
You hesitantly nod, swallowing hard. āThank you⦠thank you so much,ā you shake your head, smiling nervously, and heās politely smiling, too.
He gives you a soft nod before wandering off in the opposite direction, his gaze averting from other students, and you stand there, as if time has stalled.
Heās just as guilty, though, and that thought doesnāt cross your mind as you head to the library. What would he be guilty of? Virtually nothing. The most professional man, he would not let his guard down for a student, especially you, of all people. Thatās what you think, assume.
You werenāt there when he answered the phone last night, hearing your soft, awkward voice whispering something over the line. You didnāt see the smile curling at his lips as he paid close attention to the quiet breaths between your stumbling sentences, each syllable sending a gentle wave through his body.
When he hung up the phone, almost urgently, you didnāt see him tip his head back in frustration, mad at himself for giving in to every urge.
It was simultaneous; you were sliding your hand into your skirt, all while he was at his house, sitting on the recliner in his living room, a glass of bourbon on the coffee table, his own hand fumbling with the clasp of his belt, disappointed in the bulge he noticed in his jeans, all because of your innocent voice.
As your head tilts back, moaning his last name quietly, heās moaning your first name, a bitter taste on his tongue at the realization that heās already cum into his hand four strokes in, all because of you. And maybe he feels guilty about it, and thatās why the sudden idea of an extension seems like the best possible make-up.
You know none of this, though.
The library is warm compared to the rest of the campus, and you nestle into a small booth, right against the window. You pull out your notebook, open it, and slump back when you truly realize how few notes you took. Your distraction is evident as you look over the pages; mindless doodles, blobs of words you couldnāt decipher.Ā
āDidnāt even say bye to me this morning,ā a soft voice says, watching as your roommate slides into the booth before you, grinning, a coffee in hand. āWhatācha doing?ā she asks, adjusting her backpack, sliding her jacket off.
āGoing over⦠my notes,ā you mumble, cringing at the sight of them. She snickers behind the paper cup, looking down.
āThe lack of them, you mean,ā she teases, the cup hitting the wooden table. āWhat the hell were you doing all class?ā she asks, laughing as he tilts her head, trying to make out the name of the course at the type ā yeah, she was right.
āOh! It was he who had you distracted,ā she laughs obnoxiously with a nod, and youāre leaning over the table, shaking your head, a look of panic etched across your face.
āCan you shut up?ā you say through gritted teeth, sighing loudly as you rest back against the booth, and she has that classic shit-eating grin etched into her face.
āRelax, relax, heās probably⦠in a lecture, I donāt know,ā she lifts her hands like sheās guilty again, staring down at the table.
āYeah, but what if someone else is listening, and then they tell him, and then he hates me, and then he gives me a bad grade, and then I failāā
āOkay, what the hell has gotten into you?ā your roommate abruptly cuts in, leaning in closer, her mouth agape. āYesterday⦠he was just some asshole who was pissed at you, rightfully so, for not handing in your final, and now his validation matters?ā
She calls you out in a way that has you just staring at her, and she nods, permitting you to speak, but you donāt, because all youāre thinking about is how good the thought of him feels.
āI donāt know, I feel bad for being a bad student,ā you dismiss with a shrug, flipping over the page of your notebook. āHeās just doing his job, and Iām being⦠disobedient,ā you mumble.
āDisobedient?ā She takes a sip of her coffee, looking up at you from the lid. āYou sound like youāre his pet,ā she teases, a smirk drawn on her glossy lips, dirty innuendo in her tone. Of course, you pick up on it.
āIām going to his office later,ā you casually add to the conversation, and you swear she almost spits out her drink. āHe told me toāhe says heāll adjust the due date,ā you explain, tilting your head to the side.
āDid you do witchcraft in your bedroom last night?ā she prys, a look of disbelief on her face. āMy friend is in that class, and sheād probably shoot me, and then you, and then the professor, if she knew you were getting an extension,ā she laughs, leaning back into the booth with an exasperated sigh.
āYeah, yeah, heās just being kind,ā you dismiss, adjusting the sleeves of your blouse, then the buttons at the front.
āUndo the top two,ā your friend nods to the top of the shirt, and you grimace at her perverted suggestion. You look at her, and sheās smiling, like she just came up with the most life-changing idea on earth.
āHow low do you think of me?ā you ask, trying your best to suppress a laugh. āI just want the extension, and then I can go back to⦠dating apps, and focusing on chemistry instead ofā¦ā You pause, waving at the unfinished notes. ā...this mess.ā
āRight⦠how was that date? With the guy with the long hair, brown hair, kind of looked like some type of animal, a cute one,ā she rambles on, and youāre furrowing your eyebrows at her explanationāsheās right, he did look like a cute animal; big eyes, a charming smile.
āFine,ā you reply plainly, sighing as you flip yet another page of half-written notes. āHasnāt called me back, though,ā you admit, and your friend rolls her eyes.
āOkay, so revenge sex with your hot professor is the perfect idea,ā she instantly says, and youāre about to lean over the desk and cover her mouth with your own hand, but you resist, and instead give her no reaction.
āI think youāve lost your mind,ā you say, a short nod following, lips pursed. She analyzes your facial expression and pauses, then agrees.
āIām just saying, like, imagine⦠You do this, and then⦠I don't know, Iām just bored and living through you,ā she groans, dramatically resting her head on the table, arms flailing in front of her.
You laugh at the expression and stare at her blonde hair, a golden mess across the desk, and your eyes almost bulge out of your head when you turn to look out of the window; there he is, walking towards his car.Ā
āHoly shit,ā you say under your breath, and your roommate quickly lifts her head, her hands messing with her hair as she follows the direction of your eyes; there he is, now leaning against it, large hands cupped around a cigarette as he lights in.
The two of you watch in silence, admiring the man through the window. You feel guilty, like a sick pervert, for creeping on him while he casually smokes on his break. He doesnāt see you; he canāt see you from where you are. You bite your lip gently, laughing to yourself at the memory from last night, and your roommate looks towards you, joining in on the laughing. If only she knew.
āOkay, whatever happens,ā she starts, leaning forward like sheās your lawyer. āJust⦠tell me everything, please? Nothing good happens, Iām stuck talking to Mrs. Esther about what she did in college, and sheās beating us⦠by miles, by fucking miles,ā she practically explains, leaning back into the booth. āThreesome.. Two German exchange students, back ināā
āOkay, okay,ā you flinch in disgust, beginning to pack up your belongings, hoping to God she gets the hint to shut up. āYou need new friends, or⦠a boyfriend, I donāt know,ā you shake your head, standing up from the booth, packing away your belongings.
āText meāno, call me, immediately if anythingāā You cut her off with a look: a tilt of your head and furrowed eyebrows, and she instantly understands. āSorry,ā she says, giving you an awkward wave as you walk away from the table.
The next lectures blend, a fluid mess of words and equations, pure nonsense swarming your brain, and youāre trying your best to write it all out without getting distracted by the impending doom, seeing him in his office, alone, again.
You turn your wrist, glancing at the watch, and you bite your lip. Ten minutes until your last lecture ends, and then itās straight to his office, where you can figure out your extension and maybe a few other things. You bite your tongue next, feeling disappointed in your own thoughts.
Four oāclock, you glance at your watch again, shoes padding along the tile floor, a long hallway, a series of other offices and vacant classrooms. The overhead lights flicker, and you swallow hard, suddenly feeling like this is the worst idea imaginable.
Room 226, his office.Ā
Youāre standing in front of the door, adjusting the collar of your white blouse, and your hands drift down. Two buttons loosen slightly, and you shake your head, immediately regretting the idea, but the door is already opening, and you pause. You look up at him, hands mid-buttoning, and heās smilingāwell, itās not a smile, itās amusement.
āHowād I know it was you?ā he asks, widening the crack in the door, and you nervously laugh, flattening the rest of your shirt, and heās watching.
āWell⦠I don't know,ā you laugh nervously again, and heās opening it even more, his hand waving you in. You give him a small nod as you walk past him, and thereās definitely a reason God didnāt let you notice the way his eyes slid down to the backs of your thighs.
āSo,ā he starts lowly, the door softly shutting, the leather seat creaking as you sit down. āThis is about⦠the extension, yeah?ā he hums, walking around his desk, standing in front of it.
You donāt respond, youāre too busy being enamoured by the man before you; all muscles and rough edges, his tie hanging around his neck loosely, oddly resembling the fantasy. You shift slightly, and he looks up, acknowledging the leather's groan.
āThe extension,ā he says again, his eyes gazing up at you through the dim lighting.
āYesāyes, the extension, yes, thatās what I wanted to talk about,ā you shyly mumble, nodding quickly, and heās still standing, looking down at the mess of papers on his desk.
āDo you have any sort of copy of the final? Rough draft, ideas?ā he asks, licking the rough callous of his thumb, using it to flip through the folder that he had just lifted.
āUhm.. yeah, just⦠a short rough draft, itās not much, itās kind of bad actually,ā you ramble on again, the words coming out of you like word vomit, and he seems unaffected by all of it.
āDo you have that with you?ā he asks, eyes flicking up to you again, his large hand resting on his hip.
āYes⦠yes, itās in my bag,ā you nod quickly, eyes glancing at the way his thumb fiddles with the leather strap of his belt, and youāre frozen. He notices.
āIād like you to get that for me, sweetheart,ā he drawls, the tone so casual and flat, but the pet name has your eyes widening as a rush of heat courses through every inch of your body.
Youāre thanking your body for autopilot right now, because your hands are completely disconnected as they reach for your bag, shuffling through the many papers hidden deep inside of it. Your mind is elsewhere, adding that to your fantasy list: a professor calling me sweetheart.
āPerfect, thank you,ā he says, taking it from you and giving you a polite nod.
He grunts as he finally sits down, his hips lifting as he adjusts himself in the chair, and he sighs; one hand holds the paper, and the other rubs at his jawline again. You wait impatiently, your thigh bouncing up and down, an anxious tremor as he reads over the mess you made, an urgent piece of writing you aren't exactly proud of.
āIs this your best work?ā he suddenly asks, looking up from the paper with a displeased expression. āDoesnāt seem like your best work,ā he follows up, tossing it onto the desk, his arms folding across his chest.
āNo⦠no, itās not my best work, not at all,ā you admit, your knees rubbing together awkwardly, and youāre staring at him, youāre not sure if you can stop.
āItās poorly written,ā he says plainly, his jaw ticking in distaste. āThis is not college-level work, and you donāt have a college-level work ethic,ā he adds on, his tone scolding rather than neutral, slight frustration alcing his words.
āIāā you start, in disbelief of the words youāre hearing. Youāve never had a professor pick apart your work like this, not even your chemistry professor after a failed lab.
āNo, come here,ā he says, setting the paper down and waving you over to his desk.
Thank God for autopilot again because youāre somehow slowly standing up, slow, heavy footsteps leading you towards his desk, and suddenly youāre in his space, standing beside his desk as he sits down.
Itās so incredibly him, the scent youāre getting for the first time; thick, expensive cologne, not the silly, cheap cologne most guys your age wear, and a hint of cigarettes still lingering from his smoke break. You know he tries to hide the habit; your eyes are drifting over his desk, noticing the knick-knacks, like the gum wrapper from the piece he chewed to get rid of the gross taste.
āI want you to read this sentence for me, and tell me a student like yourself wrote this,ā he orders, his finger slowly gliding over the paper, underlining a sentence, and you swallow hard, leaning down to get a better view.
Itās silent in the office, just the quiet sound of some students walking by, and the analogue clock ticking behind both of you. Youāre reading the mess of words, warmth filling your cheeks out of nervousness.
āAre you reading it?ā he asks, turning his head slightly, and you realize heās far too close to you now, his face just a breath away.
āYes, sir,ā you whisper, and you realize how stupidly erotic that sounded, and he does too; he does not like it, the way his slacks suddenly protest against the growing bulge in them.
āThen why aren't you reading it aloud?ā he whispers, following your actions, and he taps the sentence again.
āYou⦠you didnāt tell me to,ā you defend lightly, leaning a bit more forward, awkwardly hunched over his desk.
āDo I need to tell you everything to do everything? Youāre a big girl,ā he tells you with a nod. āRead for me, please,ā he tells you, and you heasitently nod, taking in a deep breath.
You begin to speak softly, following his fingertip as it glides along the page, reading each word, watching it as it splinters into a mess that does not make sense. That does not deserve a grade, or even a glance, from a professor in his field. Youāre ashamed.
You feel it, and your heart stops; a warm hand finds your lower back, gently rubbing while you read, a comforting gesture, although itās not comforting at allāyour knees are basically buckling, and you lean forward.
āKeep going, didnāt tell you to stop,ā he mumbles, rubbing gently through your shirt, lightly dipping onto the fabric of your skirt, too.
You continue to read, stumbling over the words now, taking little pauses where you try to breathe, and heās basking in it; the stupid hiccups you make when he lightly squeezes, and youāre gripping the edge of the desk. Dear God.
āReread it for me, slower,ā he tells youāheās not asking you, itās an order, and youāre instantly giving in.
You start again, and you hear his chair groan. You pause to look, and you notice him standing up, his hand roving across your back and finding the side of your hip; meanwhile, the other one does too; he now has you bent over his desk, standing behind you, gripping your body.
āGood girl,ā he breathes out slowly, his eyes tracing down your body: your poorly arched back from a lack of experience, followed by the rip in your tights and the loose, flimsy skirt around your waist.
You grip the desk tighter, knuckles turning white, and youāre still stumbling over the words, trying to get them out in a rush. Heās merely observing from behind, large hands rubbing at your hips, moving lower, almost roving over your clothed ass.
āAgain,ā he commands quietly, and you squeeze your eyes shut, trying your best to muster the courage even to have a voice in something like this.
This time, though, heās shuffling forward, and you feel it; heās hard, and heās pressing it against you from behind. You gasp, and he bites his lip, testing his own restraint, his own ability to resist groaning at the sound youāre making.
You whimper quietly, head bowed forward, and he squeezes your hip gently. He watches you practically collapse over his desk, and itās better than what his sick imagination had gathered that night alone.
āYour work is terrible,ā he mumbles, and youāre whimpering a bit louder at the harsh words. āBut⦠god, youāre something else,ā he groans out, shaking his head as he gives into his urges, and one of his hands finds the hem of your skirt, lifting it, bunching it around your hips in a swift movement.
You look over your shoulder, watching the way he easily maneuvers your body; strong hands gripping and pulling, long fingers tugging and grabbing, and you feel your underwear sliding down your thighs.Ā
āKeep reading,ā he hums, and you turn your head back, mouth agape, eyes widened.
You grip the desk harder, groaning to yourself, hearing the clasp of his belt slowly unbuckling, a soft noise in the room. You swallow hard, hesitantly reading again; stuttering, stammering, breathing between sentences, all nervous and embarrassed, and heās soaking up the mess youāre already turning into.
His one hand holds your hip, the other one sliding down into the front of his pants, and heās ashamed of himself; hard, and regretful, but heās pulling himself out, groaning at just the sight in front of him. Itās his fantasy, too, what he was thinking about that one night.Ā
Bracing yourself, you close your eyes, softly gasping as he pushes himself against your entrance, warm and meaningful, and it makes you whimper once again.Ā
One smooth rock forward, and you have stars in your eyes, a slow burst behind your closed eyes, and you let out a loud yelp. A hand instantly comes forward, strong and large, covering your mouth in an urgent movementāother students are still walking around, finishing up some of the last lectures.
āCāmon, donāt disobey me now,ā he practically groans, his hand still braced around your hip as he mercilessly moves back and forth, your back curving in a way you didnāt know was possible; heās mainly forcing you into the position, a hungry motion, contorting you into the vision he saw last night.
You moan into his hand, eyes rolling back, standing on the tips of your toes. His head is tipped back, focused on keeping you quiet while sumtamtemly focused on his pleasure, and your own; itās a whirl of emotions, guilt and devotion clashing at once, and youāre feeling it all for the first time.
āGood girl, just like that,ā he praises quietly, grunting through clenched teeth, and youāre embarrassed by the way youāre basically collapsing onto his papers. Itās even worse, recognizing student names neatly written on essays. Jesus Christ.
Despite his palm helplessly pressing against your lips, the sound of his hips meeting the back of your thighs is louder than youād likeāheās much too lost in the feeling, the thought, to even notice. Youāre whining louder and louder, wails of pleasure in the place where youāve never found an ounce of pleasure in your fucking life.
āGod, look at you,ā he groans, his hand sliding up your hip, lightly pressing against your body, forcing your back into an arch. āStay⦠stay like that, for me, baby, come on,ā he breathes out, his own breath growing heavier and shallower.
Your fingers nails scratch into the edges of the desk, a plead for something, anything, but youāre just as lost as he is in the moment; eyes rolling back, the scent of him wrapping around you, the feeling of his warm skin against yours, the famialirlty of the office, the rush of knowing youāre five seconds away from another student knocking on the door. Itās exhilarating in a way that has your heart sinking into your stomach, almost daring you to cry.
A string of curses leaves his mouth, his hips never stalling, a fluid motion. It almost feels slow, even though heās persistent, keeping you whining for more and more, begging for something more, and itās all he can do. All he can do is give you even more.
āPerfect girl, God,ā he grunts, his teeth still clenched, his head tipping back, a louder noise he instantly regrets leaving his mouth, and heās suddenly hunched over you, heavily breathing against the back of your neck.
You feel it, dripping down your thighs, the sticky mess leaving a trail along your legs, and youāre shaking, sprawled across the wooden desk. Your forehead is damp with sweat, a glistening sheen coating your face, and heās rubbing both of your hips now, his body leaning over yours, but itās not like heās finished.
He groans quietly, admiring the work before him; your body limp and exhausted, your knees buckled, and your hand still gripping his desk. He pauses.
āOn the desk,ā he murmurs, and you donāt listen, not right now at least. Youāre limp, your mind and body physically spent from whatever the fuck just happened.
āNot gonna ask you again,ā he practically groans, an urgent plea, and youāre peeling yourself off of the desk, breathing heavily as you turn around, and heās doing the work for you; his hands finding the front of your hips, hosting you up onto the desk, and heās dipping down, suddenly on his knees.
Your eyes widen in surprise, watching his built frame nudge between your legs, and heās gripping your thighs, throwing them over his shoulders like itās a thing in the god damn world.
Heās grabbing at the side of your thighs now, one hand loosely messing around with the hem of your skirt, pushing up the pleats, letting it bunch up, giving him the room he needs.
There is zero hesitation; his mouth is against you, lips hot and warm, using his own cum to make the entire thing easierāitās slick and sticky, and heās poking and prodding with his tongue, and youāre pretty sure youāre on another planet, your mind mush and your head tipped back.
He works over you, and youāre looking down, breathing heavier than ever, watching the way he nods, his head working with his mouth; frantic, hungry swipes of his tongue, accompanied by the light suctionāhe knows your body somehow, like heās done this time and time again, maybe he has. Youāre not sure if thatās with students.
āYou taste⦠unreal,ā he groans into you, the vibrations sending a hand into his hair, where you instantly grip it, tugging him closer, and heās burying his face up against; his firm nose nudging into you, his lips following suit, his mouth engulfing you. Itās something youāve never felt.
āGod,ā he murmurs, like heās praising God more than anything right now, thanking Him for letting this happen; your body unfolding, legs opening in a way thatās just for him, and heās basking in it.
One hand is rubbing the side of your upper thigh, and the other is finding yours thatās gripping the edge of the desk, white-knuckled and urgent, and heās taking it in his own. In the midst of the impatient heat, the gentle gesture has you whining out loud, and heās shaking his head, pinching the side of your leg.
āNo⦠no, baby, shhh,ā he pulls away for just a second, his eyes finally finding yours from the low angle, and itās suddenly like youāre on your bed again, hand in your skirt, imagining this exact scenario.Ā
You hesitantly nod and swallow hard, biting your lip, your head lolling back once more. You tug on his hair lightly, and his thumb taps your hand, a reassuring touch, calming you down, keeping you grounded while your head feels like itās floating, and thereās a buzz from your neck down.
Your thighs clench and squeeze, the muscles tense while his tongue is too, delving inside of you, only to flatten out once he slides out. Itās practiced, calculated, like he's unlocking a part of you, and you hate itāalmostābeing so vulnerable and spread out on your professorās desk.
āIāmāā you pant out, regretting the warning because he lightly hits your thigh in the middle of your broken words, and he narrows his eyes.Ā
āBe... a good student, and ask me,ā he hums lowly against you, and you squeeze your eyes shut at the thought of forming any coherent sentence.
āMayāmay⦠may I⦠please, please cum,ā you whimper, and his eyes soften, like itās the sweetest thing heās ever heardāitās that voice, the whisper he heard across the phone when his hand was in his pants, his ice melting in his drink.
āMhm,ā he grants permission with a nod, just as eager to see you finish.Ā
Heās not sure what it is about you, why suddenly his guard is down, and heās letting you cum into his mouth, but he is, and the way heās looking at you is like heās been waiting for this.
Youāre pretty sure thatās the hardest youāve ever finished in your life; toes curling in your dumb shoes, your thighs squeezing around his head, tightly gripping his hand, while the other one forces his head deeper between your legs, and thereās zero resistance on his end. Heās just as guilty, giving into your pleasure, letting you feel.
He pulls back and stares up at you in the dimly lit room of his office. His mouth and chin are glistening, dripping in his own cum and yours, and his eyes are a hazy mess, chest heaving. Heās still rubbing the side of your thigh, leaning sideways, resting his cheek against the bare inner skin, lightly kissing.
Your friend won't hear about this.
The campus is quiet, your eyes glued to the trail beneath you. Each step is heavier than the last, and youāre trying your best to ignore itāthe feeling in your underwear that you pulled up in a hurry, his own hands helping you with it, all while he focuses on adjusting his tie, making it look like he didnāt just have sex with his student against his desk.
Walking into the apartment was more shameful than you wanted it to be. Thereās a part of you nagging, convincing yourself that those waiting in the elevator with you know what just happened, that youāre shamefully pressing your thighs together. He didnāt bother cleaning up your thighsāsome ramble about liking the thought of you having to walk back with it still on your legs.Ā
You couldāve stopped at the student washroom, couldāve cleaned it up, but you hated that you didnāt want to.
You slip into your complex and glance down. Your roommate's shoes are missing, a clear sign sheās gone for the evening, and itās a relief. No explaining why you took longer than you shouldāve, or why your cheeks are flushed, and why youāre walking to your bedroom so awkwardly.
You jiggle the nob of your bedroom door, confirming that itās locked before you begin taking off your skirt, letting it pool at your ankles, and then your underwear. You grimace at the sight, biting your lip; itās a mess, and youāve never felt more ashamed for being turned on.Ā
Itās significantly worse the next day: bypassing your roommate, who is overly concerned about why youāre ignoring her, not even bothering to say hello to Mrs. Esther, who is holding a cigarette outside the apartment. Youāre much too focused on that stupid lecture, and seeing him, facing him after his head was buried between your legs, his hands gripping your hips like itās the first time heās ever done it.
A deep breath, and youāre pushing open the corridors, the lecture room still half-empty. You are far too early, and heās sitting there at the front of the room, talking to a few students, and you join the short line; a few girls ahead of you, all ogling him, and itās hard to believe youāre the first student to have this filthy attraction to him.
āCan I help you?ā he asks quietly when itās your turn, and heās not even bothering to look up at you, his eyes fixed on the course material heās going to go over that class.
āUhm..ā you hum softly, hoping he looks up at the familiar softness in your voice, but he doesnāt; he remains flipping through the pages, like itās nothing.
āIf you remember, ask me at the end of the lecture,ā he responds dryly, shaking his head slightly. āOther students need help,ā he dismisses, nodding for you to go to your seat.
It feels like the air from your lungs has been swept out of you, leaving you a ghost, and you float to your usual spot, the top left, alone.Ā
He does look up when you walk away; the only girl in the whole lecture hall wearing a skirt at eight in the morning, and he shifts in his chair, a strong hand gripping the arm of it in an attempt to relieve the unfortunate tension thatās building again.
Youāre not sure if either of you can make it through this lecture, or the rest of the school year, for that matter.
ENVER GJOKAJĀ asĀ JOSEPH RAINIERĀ inĀ RESIDENT ALIENĀ 4x01: āPRISONERS"
the bologna incident
"On your knees Sugar, let me see those pretty lips wrapped around my c*ck."
*Sound of my kneecaps breaking*

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I saw this on Pinterest and genuinely cannot find the artist who made this pls @/them in the comments if you know them
I just want to talk about the mastery behind the color choices and the scene it's referencing for a minute
Gun safety / one finger on the trigger, but a full hand pushing the gun away from him
The line of yellow up the length of his body and through his head tracing the line of the bullet but instead of it being red, instead of the blood he'd be spilling its almost like a spark. A lightbulb moment where he's realizing what he's about to do and he's pushing it away.
I'm honestly just in awe of this piece and I really love the choices that were made here
EDIT
The artist is @/likeafunerall on Twitter and Insta
Molten sex
tried to channel my inner freak and write out something nasty. How did I do? Inspired by @fangirlingat2am miles quaritch drabble ;)
Pairing: Recom!Miles Quaritch x Na'vi!Reader
Summary: You just started your yearly heat and finally have someone, Quaritch, to satisfy your needs
Wordcount: 2.2k
Warnings/tags: porn without plot, heat cycles, no prepping, riding, breeding, big dick, breeding kink, tit sucking, excessive wet pussy, penis in vagina sex, unsafe sex, dirty talk, belly bulge, kuru play, tit slapping, squirting, pet names, mutual orgasm, praise kink, slight aftercare, english is not my first language, not proof read
ā āā āā āā āā āā āā āā ā
"Been waiting all day for this" you mewled, your voice only a slurred sound as your yearly heat took over your body. Like a sex crazy feral savage, you practically ripped his camo pants off his body, your hands working desperately to uncover your sopping pussy.
"Easy, Sugar. I'm not going anywhere" Quaritch chuckled, holding you by the thighs, thumb brushing over your feverish skin. Despite his words, he couldn't deny the throbbing ache pulling deep in his groin that grew more unbearable with every second that passed in which he wasn't buried in your sweet cunt.
You were already panting, your hand grasping his rock hard cock. Normally you would have jerked him off, wrapped your lips around the tip and worshipped him until he made you get up so he could fuck you, but your body was already wound tight and you feared you were going crazy. You felt like you were about to combust if you didnāt get him inside you with your next breath.
You lined him up with your hole and finally, finally sank down onto his massive cock, your folds eagerly opening up for him. The stretch in your pussy was immediate, overwhelming, despite how wet you already were.
He was huge, as thick as your wrist, longer than anything you'd ever taken and it hit the most perfect spots inside you every time, making your thighs quake from him just just filling you up with his sheer size.
"Oh fuck, Quaritch" you sighed out in utter most relief, overpronouncing the 'r' in his name, but neither you nor him cared about that right now. He found it cute, his name on your tounge, especially with the thin trail of drool running down the corner of your mouth while you looked at him like your head has just been emptied, and the only thing you still knew how to do was how to bounce on his cock.
Your cunt was immpossibly drenched, hot, slick juices coating him from tip to base, making every slide of your ovulating pussy effortless and obscenely smooth.
Up and down you went, the glide so wet it bordered on being too slippery, your walls parting greedily around his veined shaft.
Each time you dropped fully, bottoming him out against your swollen cervix, a loud, lewd slap echoed throughout the room, followed by a high moan from you and a low groan from deep withing his chest.
Your soaked entrance wetly met his heavy balls, the sound mingling with the squelch of your arousal that spilled around the base of his cock.
His thighs beneath you were a slick mess, ruined by the flood of your wetness that dripped down in thick globs, pooling on his blue skin and soaking into the fur bed beneath him. You couldn't help it. The way he filled you had your body in overdrive, sweat beading on your forehead and trickling between your heaving breasts that jiggled with every bounce.
Your moans spilled out uncontrollably, high and needy, mixing with heavy pants as you rode him harder, hips rolling in desperate circles. You were almost sobbing at how good you felt, the bioluminescent freckles on your body pulsing in sync with every wave of pleasure rolling over you.
Quaritchs yellow eyes were locked on you, his pupils dark with lust and that deeply rooted affection he reserved only for you. "Goddamn, look at you, baby" he drawled, voice gravelly and thick, the sound sending shocks down your spine and causing your pussy to squeeze him even tighter.
His eyes fluttered at the sensation, his jaw going slack watching his dick disappear in your cunt "My cocks stretchin' you so pretty, fuck, love it when you're like this" His words hit like sparks, igniting your heat soaked core, making fresh gushes of slick coat him even more. Your body trembled harder, eyes starting to roll back in your head, crossing slightly as the pleasure blurred your vision and took every reason out of your head.
All you could think about was cock. His cock. His cum, in your pussy, breeding you good.
You sobbed pathetically, your body falling forward in exhaustion, but you caught yourself, your palms sprawling out over his chest to steady yourself. Even though your body was getting tired, not even if someone put a gun to your head would you stop grinding your hips back on his dick. Your breasts swayed between your arms, the movement hypnotising to the starved man.
Quaritch reached up, his large hands palming your perfect, sweat-slick tits, thumbs flicking over your stiff nipples before squeezing the soft flesh, giving them a soft slap. "All tits, no brain. Ain't that right, baby?" he teased you with that smug grin on his face.
If you hadn't been this batshit horny, you would have wiped that smirk off his frustratingly handsome face in a second. But against your better judgement, you babbled out a dumb "uh-huh" your words ending in a cute little mewl as he pinched your nipples, softly pulling at the peaks.
You were needily arching into his rough touch, the added sensation sending jolts straight to your clit. Drool escaped you once again as you bounced with wild abandon, the easy in and out, his veiny cock dragging against your walls.
Slap, squelch, slap, the sounds were making Quaritch go crazy.
Your steady rhythm faltered for a moment. "Q-Quaritch..." you panted out, your voice just over a whisper. You didn't know why you said his name, why it seemed like a plea, like you craved something more than just his cock.
Quaritch groaned under you, one strong hand keeping you moving on his cock by grabbing the soft flesh of your thigh "Fuck, keep saying my name while you get yourself off on my dick, sugar" he murmured into the valley between your breasts.
He kissed and sucked your jiggling tits, not long before a nipple slipped between his lips. The suckling and nursing of his mouth made you gasp, the coil in your core tightening.
You threw your head back, your mind swimming with pleasure. "Quaritch- I, please, oh-" you hiccuped, the coherent words you tried to speak being interrupted by a string of wanton moans.
He was about to egg you on even more, telling you to use your words if you wanted something from him. But then he catched your braid falling over your shoulder into your lap, your queue slithering free between the dark strands of hair, desperately seeking his.
He huffed softly. This was the thing you wanted the most from him, an ache not even his cock could satisfy deep within you. He heard you whimper his name once more. That was it. He grasped his kuru, guiding his own neural tendrils to intertwine with yours. Tsaheylu snapped into place, an electric jolt racing through your veins, bonding your sensations. You felt his pleasure echo yours, the throb of his cock, the clench of your walls, his feelings ebbing into yours as if you were one.
You screamed. Quaritch pupils were already wide, but now they resembled dinner plates, almost swallowing all of the rich yellow colour around them. "Yeah, feel how bad I want you" he whispered, not even knowing if you heard him, but you certainly felt it.
Your body folded backwards, your hands on his thighs keeping you steady while your back arched and your head rested between your shoulders. Your hips kept their movements going, your pussy dragging along his cock.
This new position revealed what you felt all along, now visible to the naked eye, Quaritch cock nestled all the way in your gut. A bulge formed in the lower parts of your stomach, disappearing and reappearing with every thrust of your hips.
Quaritch damn near lost it.
He moaned at the sight, one hand sliding down to press firmly against the prominent swell in your lower belly, right where his cock outlined itself inside you. This was probably the most erotic thing he had ever seen in his entire life, licking his lips as he watched your clear arousal turn thicker and white with every bounce. "Filthy little thing, creamin' all over me. Gonna breed this pussy full."
The pressure of his hand made stars burst behind your eyelids and his words, fuck he always knew what to say to make you completely lose your mind.
Your eyes rolled back fully now, crossing in ecstasy as you shook violently on him, thighs quivering like they had turned into jelly. Sweat poured off you, mingling with the wetness between your legs, and just thinking about Quaritchs seed taking root in your womb made you want to explode. You cried, hot tears streaming down your cheeks.
He put a hand on your arm, pulling you into a more up-right position so you could look into his eyes. You felt his release building through the bond, hot and insistent, every time you bottomed out.
"Gonna make you squirt all over me, aren't I? Cum for your man, baby. Let it go."
It was effortless, the way he unraveled you. His long fingers pulled your nipples harder, his thumb pressing against your tummy, cock throbbing inside your soaked heat.
The coil snapped without warning.
You cried out, a guttural moan tearing from your throat as your orgasm crashed over you. Your pussy clenched rhythmically, squirting in forceful bursts that sprayed across his abs and thighs, adding to the slickness of your paired arousals. The pressure made his cock slip free from you.
"Quaritch!" you whined loudly at the loss, sobbing pathetically and cock-drunk.
Lucky for you, he needed to cum inside you. Right now. You weren't empty for long as he swiftly pulled you back on him by the hips, hissing as your still pulsing pussy enveloped his sensitive tip.
"Ugh, Miles!" you squeaked in relief as he filled you once more. You were trembling uncontrollably, body shaking on his cock, panting through the pleasure thrumming in your veins, eyes still lost in crossed bliss.
"That's my girl" he praised, bucking up to meet your spasms, his own release building. "Squirtin' so pretty for me, fuck, that pussy is perfect. You're perfect, sugar"
Quaritch roared then, his cock pulsing strongly against your cervix, unleashing rope after rope of thick cum, flooding your pussy until your hole overflowed with the sheer amount of it, white streams leaking over his abdomen with each thrust.
It was so much, excessive, and messy just how you liked it, his seed painting your insides and marking you utterly as his.
He kept thrusting through it, prolonging his orgasm to make sure he filled you with every last drop to satisfy every craving your womb had during your heat so it could finally die down.
You both panted in the aftershocks of your orgasms, your thighs shaking poorly. Boneless, you fell forward, not being able to support your own weight on your legs any longer. He cought you gently, laying you against his sweaty chest, though it felt cooling when your cheeks were pressed to his skin, a sigh escaping you.
When the pounding of your heartbeat in your ears faded away and you could grasp a thought that wasn't just about Quaritch fucking you, you cringed. His cum was dripping out of you, but you were too lazy to move a muscle. Not that you even could. Your muscles were sore like they hadn't been in a long time, the joints in your knees aching faintly.
Quaritch eased you into the nest of fur blankets next to him so he could sit up and slowly bend your legs. Your knees had been locked up in the same angled position for a while and the least thing he could do was give you a little massage to ease the pain.
His thumb dug into the tendons of your calves, triggering points to relief tension. You practically melted into the pillows. "You feelin' alright, Sugar?" he asked you like he hadn't just fucked the living daylights out of you.
"Never better" you muttered sleepily, your eyes at the brink of closing. You felt warm, your heart full amongst other things and oh, how perfect this evening would be if you could cuddle up against him and fall asleep.
Seemed like you weren't gonna get to the cuddling part, at least not concious. Just a minute later, when Quaritgh looked back up at you, the lights were out. Your mouth was opened in a soft snore, your nose scrunched softly. It warmed his heart, something he hadn't thought was possible with all the shit he had witnessed and done in his lifetime, blue or not.
He cleaned up both of you, not wanting you to wake up feeling sticky and gross, before joining you in bed, pulling your sleeping body against his side with a kiss to your temple.
Quaritch played gently with your kuru behind your back, the smooth braid wrapped around his palm until he, too, fell asleep.
ā āā āā āā āā āā āā āā āā
Damn I have to stop writing shit like this until 3 amš im literally so tired rn guys I hope everything makes sense. Please comment, write me a book, its the only thing keeping me alive atp. Good night <3
