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smoking in riki’s bed is the best way to relax after a stressful day… if he can find his weed.
📓pairing: dealer!riki x fem!reader
contains: weed smoking skinship fluff kissing bickering riki’s kind of rude to his mom
🗯️vaeh’s note: i guess I’m back from my short ass break. this was supposed to be a Higher drabble but ig this counts as a regular bonus part now cs I am the worst at keeping my ffs short
⊹
Everything about today had been advertised as fun. A “production day,” your lecturer had called it all week with way too much enthusiasm, promising creative freedom and relaxed schedules and exciting group work.
Instead, it had been six straight hours of irritation, passive aggressive comments, and carrying an entire project on your back while the rest of your group stared blankly at their laptops pretending to work.
By two in the afternoon, your social battery was dead.
Your group presentation was supposed to start in less than ten minutes, yet you were hiding in a bathroom stall with your phone pressed to your ear. Your knee bounced restlessly.
“Come on,” you muttered under your breath when it rings again.
Then finally—
“Hey baby—”
“Can you pick me up?”
You cut straight through his greeting, voice exhausted enough to make him pause on the other end.
“…What?”
You sigh, leaning your head back against the cold metal wall behind you. “Can you come get me?”
Riki exhales softly through his nose.
“When?”
“Right now.”
“Right now?” he repeats. “Baby, I can’t right now.”
You frown instantly.
“Why not?”
“I’m working.”
You roll your eyes even though he couldn’t see it. Working. So selling weed to junks.
“And didn’t you say you had class till four?” he adds. “What happened?”
“Yea? I don’t wanna go.”
A small laugh escapes him. “That’s not really how it works.”
“Oh my god,” you groan dramatically, rubbing your forehead. “You cannot be serious.”
“What?”
“You telling me not to skip class?” Your voice sharpened with disbelief. “Riki, you’ve attended like three classes this entire year.”
“Yeah. Don’t be like me.” Riki says.
“Please just come get me,” you try again, softer this time. “I’m so done with today.”
You heard muffled voices in the background on his side of the phone. A car door shutting. Someone calling his name.
Riki clicks his tongue quietly.
“Baby, I really can’t right now. I’ve got like 6 more clients today.”
Your face drops immediately.
“I hate everyone here.”
“I know.”
“No, like actually fucking hate them.”
“I know,” he repeats. “Just come over when your classes are finished, okay?”
You let out the most miserable whine imaginable, dragging the sound out on purpose just to irritate him.
“Rikiiii.”
“That’s not changing my answer.”
Another long sigh left you before you pull the phone away from your ear.
“Whatever.”
“Don’t be mad—”
But you already hung up.
The call ends with a sharp tap of your thumb.
You sit there for another second in irritated silence, glaring at the picture of you and Riki on your lockscreen before shoving the phone into your bag aggressively.
Then you stand up, grab your things, and push the stall door open way harder than necessary. The loud slam echoes through the bathroom.
A girl by the mirror startles and looks over.
“Jeez.” The girl mutters to herself.
You ignore her completely, storming toward the exit, already rehearsing in your head how badly you’re going to guilt trip Riki later for abandoning his poor girlfriend.
—
By the time you arrive at Riki’s house around four thirty, your irritation hasn’t faded even a little. You text him the second you reach the driveway.
You: im here
Riki: door’s open. mom’s downstairs
You shove your phone into your pocket and push the front door open without knocking.
At this point, you’re over here so much it feels like your second home. The house smells faintly like laundry detergent and food. You hear the TV playing softly somewhere in the living room before his mom notices you walking in.
“Oh, hi sweetheart.”
You look over with a smile. “Hi miss Nishimura.”
“How was your day?”
You let out a dramatic sigh immediately. “Horrible.”
She laughs knowingly from the couch. “That bad?”
“You have no idea.”
“Well,” she says, shaking her head with amusement, “Riki’s upstairs. And tell him to clean that room before it starts growing mold.”
You snort. “I’ll try.”
You laugh softly before heading upstairs, already hearing faint music through the slightly open bedroom door.
The second you push it open wider, you catch Riki mid-motion. He’s shoving an overflowing laundry basket under his bed with his foot fast.
The room still looks messy anyway. Black hoodie tossed over his desk chair. Empty water bottles near the nightstand. Chains and rings scattered around like decoration.
And him.
Black joggers hanging low on his hips, white tank top stretched over his frame, black zip-up hoodie hanging open. Silver rings glinting against his fingers. Cross necklace resting against his chest.
Your mood somehow gets worse instantly.
“There's she is,” he says casually, like he hasn’t just panic-cleaned the second he heard you coming upstairs.
You don’t even answer. You just walk over and let yourself collapse face first onto his bed dramatically, burying your face into his pillow.
It smells exactly like him. Detergent, smoke and cologne.
Riki chuckles quietly behind you.
“Aww,” he teases. “You’re having a hard life today?”
“Yeah.”
“Mhm.”
The mattress dips as he climbs beside you, one arm immediately sliding across your lower back, pulling you closer against him lazily.
“What’s up?” he asks, voice lower now.
Your response comes muffled into the pillow.
“I just wanna graduate already.”
He laughs softly at that.
You finally roll onto your back with a long sigh, staring at the ceiling dramatically. Riki looks down at you with obvious amusement before leaning down and kissing your cheek once.
Then again. Then your forehead and hen the corner of your mouth.
“Talk to me,” he says.
You narrow your eyes at him while he shifts onto his back beside you, opening one arm, inviting you. You stare at him for a second before groaning loudly.
“What?”
“You look good,” you complain miserably. “It’s pissing me off more.”
You move anyway, immediately curling into his side. One leg thrown over his while his arm settles around your waist automatically. He grins.
“That’s your problem?”
“Yes.”
“Damn.”
You sigh dramatically again before starting your rant properly.
You tell him about the presentation disaster. About your group members barely helping. About one dude showing up completely unprepared and still acting cocky anyway. About having to fix everything yourself while everybody else stood around being useless.
Riki mostly listens quietly, fingers tracing along your waist beneath your t-shirt.
Sometimes he hums. Sometimes he laughs when you mock someone. Sometimes he drops a quiet “that’s crazy” just to keep you talking.
“And then,” you continue, growing more irritated again just remembering it, “they’re all panicking asking me what to say during the presentation like I’m their fucking mother.”
“I’m jealous of you.” You say.
Riki frowns. “Why?”
“You literally just do whatever you want.”
Riki’s expression shifts slightly at that. His hand moves slowly up your back.
“That’s not really a good thing, baby.”
You shrug against him. “Still.”
“Nah.” He shakes his head lightly. “You say that now, but you’re actually doing something with your life.”
You snort. “Barely.”
“I mean it. You’re gonna graduate, get your degree, all that shit.” His fingers squeeze your side lightly. “That matters.”
You look up at him. “You sound like a dad.”
“I’m trying to help you.”
“You’re lecturing me.”
“I’m trying to be a good influence.”
You stare at him for a second before sighing loudly and burying your face against his chest again.
“I still hate everybody.”
“That’s okay,” he says easily, pressing a kiss into your hair.
You’re half sprawled on top of him now, your cheek pressed against his chest while his hand keeps moving up and down your back. The late afternoon light coming through his curtains makes the room feel warm and sleepy.
Until the thought hits you.
“I wanna smoke.”
Riki reacts immediately. Like genuinely immediately.
“Okay.”
You snort softly at how fast he says it.
He shifts underneath you, rolling onto his side to reach into his nightstand drawer. You hear the cluttering sound of him moving random things around, lighter, charger, loose receipts, wrappers probably. But then it goes quiet.
“The fuck?”
You lift your head slightly.
Riki’s brows furrow as he digs around harder. “Wait.”
You watch him pull the drawer out further.
Empty.
His whole expression changes instantly. Not fully panicked yet, but close enough that it makes you start smiling already.
“No way,” he mutters.
Without warning, he slips out from underneath you and gets off the bed fast enough to make it bounce. He opens his underwear drawer next, shoving things around aggressively before pulling out a small box hidden beneath his boxers.
Empty too.
“Oh my god,” he says under his breath.
You’re fully entertained now, just laying there watching him spiral.
He checks his backpack next. Nothing.
“What the fuck?” he says again, louder this time. “Nah nah nah.”
You’re trying not to laugh.
Riki turns to look at you with genuine concern in his eyes now.
“I think my mom took my stash.”
That makes you snort. But he doesn’t laugh at all.
His jaw tightens while he runs both hands through his hair, already stressed.
“Riki,” you say between laughs, “are you serious—”
“This isn’t funny.”
“It kinda is.”
“No, it’s really not.”
He’s already leaving the room before you can answer, and he leaves the door wide open behind him. You hear his footsteps down the stairs before his voice carries faintly through the house.
“Mom?”
“In the kitchen!”
You sit up slightly on the bed, immediately listening.
Riki walks into the kitchen trying to sound casual.
“Mom… were you in my room earlier?”
“Yes,” his mom answers easily. “Why?”
“Did you… take something?”
“Your drugs?”
Riki clicks his tongue. “It’s just weed.”
“And weed is still drugs. And it still makes the entire house smell.”
“Mom.”
“No, seriously,” she continues. “I’m tired of the smell. And I don’t want you doing that stuff all day.”
“You can’t just take my stuff.”
“I absolutely can if it’s in my house.”
“It’s my money you threw away, good quality shit,” he argues back, frustration slipping into his voice now. “Do you know how much was in there?”
“Maybe if you went to school instead of selling weed—”
“Oh my god.”
“You’re twenty years old, Riki.”
“And paying for my own stuff.”
“With drug money.”
He lets out a sharp exhale through his nose, clearly realizing the conversation is going nowhere.
“This is crazy,” he mutters.
Then you hear his footsteps coming back upstairs.
The second he walks back into the room, he looks miserable. You’re already grinning.
“She threw it away,” he complains immediately, throwing himself dramatically onto the bed beside you. “Everything.”
“I heard.”
“This is fucked up.”
You laugh softly while he lays there staring at the ceiling like his life is over.
“My own mother robbing me.”
“She’s probably trying to save your future.”
“She threw away like—” He cuts himself off with another annoyed groan. “I don’t even know— a lot of fucking money.”
Still smiling, you move closer again, half laying over him comfortably while he keeps muttering complaints under his breath.
Your hand slides across his side. Then pauses. There’s something in the pocket of his hoodie.
You feel the slight crinkle of plastic underneath the fabric. Riki notices your expression immediately.
“…What?”
Instead of answering, you slip your hand into his hoodie pocket.
“Oh shit.”
You pull out the tiny plastic bag slowly between two fingers. Then your grin spreads immediately.
“Oh my god, thank—”
“We’re not smoking that.”
He snatches it from your hand before you can even finish.
You stare at him.
“Riki.”
“It’s for a client.”
You let out an actual laugh. “Be forreal.”
“I am forreal.”
“Fuck your client.”
“My client is how I make money.”
“Your client can survive one night without weed.”
“He already paid.”
You roll your eyes dramatically before settling between on top of his legs while he keeps the bag out of reach.
“So refund him.”
“Refund him?” He laughs under his breath. “That’s not how that works.”
Your fingers start moving absentmindedly over his stomach through the thin tank top while you speak, nails lightly scratching against the fabric.
“You’re acting like it’s ten kilos.”
“I’m being responsible.”
You snort loudly at that word.
“Responsible.”
“Yes.”
“You skipped like an entire month of school.”
“I’m still enrolled.”
Your hand slides lower against his waist slowly.
“C’monnnn.” you murmur. “I had the worst day.”
“You say that every day.”
“Because people test me every day.”
“Mhm.”
“And now you’re sitting here gatekeeping weed from me.”
“I’m not gatekeeping.”
“You are, though.”
His hand settles on your thigh automatically, fingers squeezing once while he watches you with narrowed eyes.
“You’re manipulative as hell, i hope you know that.”
You tilt your head innocently. “What? I’m just talking.”
“Yeah?” he says. “That’s why your hands are all over me.”
“Maybe because you look good.”
You lean closer while talking, fingers trailing underneath the hem of his tank top just slightly, feeling the warmth of his skin underneath.
Riki exhales slowly through his nose.
“Manipulative”
“And you’re still not giving me the weed.”
He shakes his head, but he’s already losing. You can tell.
“Imagine,” you continue casually, “choosing some random stoner over your sexy girlfriend after she suffered through six hours hell.”
“Hell?”
“Yes.”
“You’re insane.”
“And sober,” you remind him. “Which is your fault.”
That finally makes him laugh. You immediately take advantage of it, reaching for the bag again. He pulls it away last second.
“Riki,” you groan.
“No.”
“Why are you acting like this is life or death?”
“Because my mom already murdered my business today.”
You roll your eyes before shifting even closer into his lap until your face is right near his. Your hands slide up his chest while you talk softly, your lips hovering above his.
“You like me more than your client, right?”
Then he squints at you. “You’re so full of shit.”
“But am I wrong?”
His hand tightens on your thigh again while he stares at your lips for a second too long.
You already know you won.
“If this dude starts blowing up my phone later, I’m blaming you.”
You smile slowly. “So we’re smoking?”
“Pleaseeee. I know you want it too.”
He exhales slowly, staring at the tiny bag in his hand like he’s mourning it already.
“Fine.”
“Yesssss.”
You grin immediately and kiss his cheek fast before he can change his mind.
“Love you.”
“Yeah yeah,” he mutters. “You love my weed.”
Riki keeps muttering under his breath about loss while he rolls onto his side toward the nightstand.
You grin to yourself, while he pulls open the drawer again and starts gathering everything he needs. Grinder. Papers. Lighter.
You laugh softly and sit up against the headboard while he settles beside you cross-legged, focused now.
His rings glint under the golden sunlight while he breaks the weed apart between his fingers. You watch him quietly while he works, music humming softly in the background from his speaker.
There’s something stupidly attractive about watching him roll.
Maybe it’s the concentration on his face. The silver chain resting against his throat. The way his hoodie slips down slightly off one shoulder while he leans forward.
He finishes rolling the blunt with a small nod to himself before licking the edge closed carefully. Then he grabs the lighter, sparks it once, twice, before the tip finally glows orange.
The smell fills the room almost instantly.
Riki takes the first hit automatically, checking the burn, then passes it over to you.
You take it from him slowly, inhaling deep while he gets off the bed.
The smoke settles warm in your lungs while you watch him move around the room. He cracks the window open first, then turns the music up slightly louder.
You exhale toward the ceiling with a long satisfied sigh before letting yourself fall backward onto his bed dramatically.
“Oh my god.”
Riki laughs quietly while climbing back onto the mattress.
“That good?”
“Mhm.”
He takes the blunt back from your fingers and leans against the headboard beside you. You watch him inhale slowly before he tilts his head back slightly, doing a french inhale.
You narrow your eyes.
“Okay show off.”
He grins lazily. “You wish you could do that.”
“I literally can.”
“You can’t.”
You grab at the blunt immediately. “Give it.”
He laughs again but hands it over.
Riki’s eyes are getting red, eyelids hanging lower, his movements slower. And you can feel yourself melting into the mattress more every second.
You move closer without really thinking about it, thigh pressing against his while you take another hit.
“Does your mom know I smoke with you?” You ask quietly.
Riki immediately lets out a short laugh.
“No.”
“Why’d you laugh like that?”
“Because she’d actually kill me.”
You grin slightly. “Really?”
“Yes, really.” He takes the blunt back. “She already hates that I smoke. If she found out I got you smoking too?” He shakes his head. “I’d never survive.”
“You didn’t get me smoking.”
“You met me because I sold to you.”
“Okay.”
He points at you with the blunt. “Exactly.”
You laugh quietly while laying your head against his shoulder.
“She thinks I’m a bad influence already,” he says.
“You are a bad influence.”
“Maybe.”
Riki takes another hit before continuing, words slower now.
“One time she caught me smoking in the garage and made me deep clean the whole house for like two days.”
“No way.”
“I’m serious.” He looks genuinely offended remembering it. “She took my car keys too.”
You start laughing harder.
“She said if I wanted to ‘act grown’ then I could start doing grown people chores.”
He rolls his eyes lazily before nudging your leg with his knee.
“What about your parents? They know?”
You think for a second.
“I don’t think so.”
“Not even about me?”
“They know you’re my boyfriend,” you say vaguely.
You grin.
“I just don’t think they know you deal.”
“And the smoking?”
You shrug lightly. “My mom definitely suspects something sometimes.”
“She ever ask?”
“Once.”
“What’d you say?”
“That my eyes were red because I was tired.”
Riki immediately starts laughing.
“That’s such bullshit.”
“She believed me.”
“No she didn’t.”
“She did.”
“She chose to believe you,” he corrects.
You smile a little at that because honestly, he’s probably right.
The conversation slowly drifts after that. Neither of you talking much anymore.
The weed settles heavier into your body until everything feels warm and slow and comfortable. The music sounds better. His room feels warmer and you get clingy.
Your hands keep finding him without even thinking about it.
Resting on his chest. Sliding under his hoodie. Fingers tracing over the rings on his hands. Playing with the chain around his neck. Touching his arm, his stomach, his jaw.
Riki notices eventually.
“You’re attached to me right now.”
“Mhm.”
He smiles lazily, eyes half closed now while you curl fully against him.
“So cute.”
One of your legs thrown over his again. Your face pressed into the side of his neck.
His hand drifts slowly up and down your back while the room stays quiet except for the music and your soft occasional laughter at literally nothing.
Your entire horrible day feels far away now.
The blunt is almost done by now. Just one hit left. You take the last hit slowly, inhaling deep.
“Baby,” Riki says quietly.
You look at him. He just tilts his head slightly, eyes flicking toward your mouth.
Oh. A small grin pulls at your lips immediately.
Without a word, you shift up, swinging one leg over his lap so you’re sitting on top of him properly. His back presses against the bedframe while his hands settle automatically on your hips.
You lean down close. Then slowly exhale the smoke into his mouth.
Riki inhales instantly, eyes fixed on your lips the entire time.
You stay close after, barely pulling away.
His gaze drags over your face lazily before he turns his head slightly to the side to exhale the smoke away from you. One hand reaches toward the nightstand blindly, dropping the finished blunt into the glass of water beside the bed with a quiet sizzle.
Then he looks back at you and kisses you immediately.
His lips warm against yours while your arms slide around his neck automatically. The kiss tastes faintly like smoke, his hand moving up your side underneath your hoodie while he pulls you closer against him.
Your fingers slip into the hair at the back of his neck.
His hand is sliding up your throat gently, thumb brushing your jaw while he deepens the kiss.
You breathe out softly against his mouth when his other hand moves lower, dragging down your waist before settling on your ass with a firm squeeze.
His tongue pushes into your mouth while his grip tightens slightly, guiding your hips forward instinctively. Then back, then forward again, while softly humming into the kiss.
The movement makes heat curl low in your stomach instantly.
He has his hands all over you like he can’t decide where he wants them most.
One hand squeezing your thigh now. The other still holding your waist, moving you against him in a way that has your head getting fuzzier by the second.
Then—
A knock.
“Riki.”
You both freeze instantly.
You practically launch yourself off his lap while Riki looks down at his crotch and quickly adjusts his joggers to hide something.
You drop back onto the bed casually, grabbing your phone like you’ve been doing absolutely nothing suspicious.
Riki starts aggressively waving his hand through the air trying to clear the smoke, muttering a quiet “shit” under his breath.
“Yeah?” he calls out.
His mom opens the door. The second she steps inside, her face twists immediately.
“Oh my god.”
Riki sighs dramatically already.
“It smells disgusting in here.”
Riki shrugs. You bite the inside of your cheek hard to stop yourself from laughing.
His mom looks around the room with visible disappointment before glaring at him again.
“I just told you about this earlier.”
Riki scoffs quietly, slouching further against the headboard. “Okay.”
“Don’t ‘okay’ me.”
He stays quiet this time. Probably because arguing more would make her stay longer.
Thankfully, she moves on with another sigh.
“Anyway, I’m going out to dinner with a friend later, so you two need to figure out food yourselves.”
“Okay.”
“And clean this room.”
Riki looks around lazily at the disaster surrounding him.
“It is clean, mom.”
His mom stares at him in disbelief. She shakes her head like she’s exhausted with him. Then she turns and walks out. Leaving the door completely open behind her.
“Mom!” Riki calls after her immediately. “Close the door.”
She ignores him completely and keeps walking downstairs.
He drops his head back against the wall with an annoyed groan.
“You see how nobody respects me in this house?”
He rolls his eyes while you crawl closer again, reaching up to grab his face with both hands. You squish his cheeks together dramatically, lips pursed in fake pity.
“Awww,” you say mockingly. “Poor baby. Mommy yelled at you again?”
“Shut up,” he mumbles through squished cheeks.
“This,” he says while pulling your hands away, “is why I smoke. My mom stresses me out.”
“She just told you to clean your room.”
“Exactly.”
“That’s normal.”
“It’s already clean.”
You slowly turn your head to look around the room. Then back at him.
“Is it?”
“Yes.”
The disbelief on your face makes him scoff instantly.
“It is.”
“Riki.”
“What?”
You narrow your eyes at him before suddenly leaning over the side of the bed.
Riki reacts immediately. He grabs your waist trying to pull you back before you can look underneath, but he’s too slow.
You already see everything. The laundry basket tipped completely over, half the clothes spilled out across the floor underneath the bed. Empty water bottles. A pizza box. Random chargers. One sock hanging off something.
And… you slowly reach down with two fingers.
You hold up a pair of grey Calvin Klein boxers delicately like they’re contaminated.
“You’re disgusting.”
He clicks his tongue and snatches them from your fingers fast and throws them back underneath the bed aggressively.
“Stop looking under there.”
You ignore him completely.
Still bent over the side of the bed, you keep inspecting his mess pile while Riki flops back dramatically behind you.
“Leave my room alone.” he says, laughing under his breath.
“There’s enough water bottles under here to survive an apocalypse.”
“I was gonna throw them away.”
“When? Next year?”
He grabs your ankle, trying to drag you back up onto the bed.
“Come here.”
“No, I’m investigating.”
Your eyes catch on something small shoved further back underneath the bed.
You pull it out quietly.
A pair of pink panties. You recognize them instantly because you’ve been wondering where they disappeared to weeks ago.
But instead of saying that, you just stare at them for a second.
Then slowly sit back up onto the bed.
Riki’s still relaxed at first, watching you casually.
Until you look at him.
“Riki,” you say slowly.
“Hm?”
“Are you cheating on me?”
The change in his expression is immediate.
“What?”
You hold up the panties silently, keeping your face completely serious.
Riki stares at them for one second before scoffing.
“Baby, those are yours.”
You don’t answer. Just keep staring at him.
“You literally left those here.”
“No I didn’t.”
“Yes you did.”
“I’ve never seen those in my life.”
He snorts. “Okay.”
“I’m serious.”
“You’re lying.”
You shrug lightly. “Am I?”
Riki still looks entertained at first, completely unconcerned while he reaches for his phone beside him.
“They’re yours y/n.”
“I think I’d remember my own underwear.”
He glances over at you again.
You’re still staring at him with the exact same serious expression. No smile, no laugh.Nothing.
The amusement slowly starts fading from his face. Riki sits up a little straighter now.
“Are you being serious right now?”
You look down at the panties in your hands dramatically before looking back at him.
“I don’t know, Riki. Should I be?”
“Baby,” he says immediately, now fully paying attention. “That is literally yours.”
“But what if it’s not?”
He stares at you for another second, trying to figure out if you’re joking.
Then his phone gets tossed aside completely.
“Baby— what?.” He moves closer fast, hands immediately finding your face. “Why would I cheat on you?”
You bite the inside of your cheek trying not to laugh.
“You think I’d do that?”
You shrug again.
Riki looks genuinely stressed now.
“No, seriously.” His thumbs brush against your cheeks while he searches your face. “I would never do that to you.”
Your expression almost breaks right there.
“I promise you that.” he says softer now.
“Mhm.”
“I’m serious.”
“I know.”
“You’re the only girl that’s ever in my room.”
That one nearly makes you lose it. Especially because he sounds so sincere.
His brows are pulled together now, eyes low and worried while he keeps holding your face close.
“I’d never cheat on you,” he says again quietly. “Don’t look at me like that.”
You can’t hold it anymore.
“Hahaaaaa— gotcha.”
Riki freezes. Then realization slowly washes over his face.
“I knew it.”
You’re laughing so hard now you almost fall sideways off the bed.
“Oh my god, your face—”
“Get out of here with your fuckass pranks.”
“I got you so stressed.” you wheeze. “You got all serious—”
You keep laughing while mocking his voice.
“Baby, I’d never cheat on you.”
“Shut up.”
“You’re the only girl in my room.”
Riki shoves you hard enough to make you flop backward onto the mattress while he falls back beside you dramatically.
“You’re annoying as fuck.”
You’re still laughing.
“You looked so scared.”
“You kept staring at me like you were about to cry.”
You roll on top of him immediately, still grinning while he tries to stay annoyed.
It doesn’t work very well. Especially not when you start kissing his face repeatedly. One on his cheek. Another near his jaw. Then the corner of his mouth.
“Sorry,” you laugh against his skin.
“No you’re not.”
“I’m kinda sorry.”
“Mhm.”
You kiss him again anyway, arms wrapping around his neck. He’s still shaking his head.
“Actually can’t stand you,” he mutters.
But he’s smiling when he says it.
You’re still laughing when you lean down to kiss him again. And again and again.
Riki tries to stay annoyed, but you can literally feel him fighting a smile underneath your mouth every time you kiss the corner of his lips.
“Don’t be mad,” you mumble against his cheek.
You poke his face.
“Riki.”
He grabs your wrist immediately. “Stop poking me.”
“I’ve never seen you that stressed in my life.” you continue, grinning down at him.
“I could tell you were joking.”
“Aww,” you tease again, lightly squishing his face. “Did you?’
“I don’t like you.”
“You do.”
You kiss him again before squishing his cheek one more time.
“Don’t be mad.”
“I’m warning you right now.”
You ignore him completely.
Another poke.
“Baby—”
Another kiss.
“Don’t be—”
Suddenly his hands grab your waist hard.
You barely have time to yelp before he flips you over completely, throwing you onto the mattress with a laugh.
“Riki!”
“There,” he says while climbing over you fast. “Got you.”
You’re still laughing when he pins both your wrists above your head with one hand.
He leans down and bites lightly at your neck with a playful growl that makes you yell immediately.
Riki grins against your skin before suddenly attacking your sides with his free hand.
“You were asking for it.”
You scream instantly.
“RIKI—”
“You thought you were funny?”
“STOP—”
He keeps tickling you, fingers everywhere now while you twist underneath him laughing so hard you can barely breathe. Your legs kick against the bed uselessly while he keeps your wrists pinned easily.
“Talking all that shit,” he says through his own laughter. “Now look at you.”
“STOP—”
“No.”
“PLEASE—”
“Say sorry.”
“I— I DID!”
“Say it properly.”
You can barely get words out between laughing.
He keeps going. Tickling your stomach now, your sides, under your arms, everywhere he knows makes you lose your mind.
You’re literally crying laughing at this point.
“Okay okay— sorry!”
“What was that?”
“Sorry!!”
“Hmm?”
“I’m sorry Riki!”
Finally he stops.Both of you breathing hard now.
Riki looks down at you smugly while still pinning your wrists above your head. Then he leans down and kisses the side of your jaw once before letting go completely.
“That’s what I thought. Good girl.”
You glare at him and immediately kick his leg one last time.
He laughs while rolling off you.
You just lay there dramatically trying to recover, chest rising and falling while your face hurts from laughing.
“Oh my god,” you groan.
“You started it.”
“You almost killed me.”
You stare at the ceiling for another few quiet seconds before your stomach growls loudly.
Riki immediately snorts.
“…I’m hungry.”
“Yeah?”
“Mhm.”
He stretches lazily before sitting up, hoodie riding up slightly, giving you a peek of the tattoo on his side.
“Get up then.” He says while reaching over to tap your thigh.
You follow him downstairs.
You hop up onto the kitchen counter while Riki starts checking for food. The fridge first.
He stares inside for a few seconds. “Why do we only have ingredients?”
He starts pulling random things out dramatically.
Spinach. Eggs. Sauce. Half a cucumber.
“You could cook.”
“I’m not cooking.”
You roll your eyes.
Next he checks the cabinets. Same problem. Pasta. Rice. Random canned stuff.
“What even is this.”
You laugh softly from the counter while swinging your legs.
Then he opens the freezer.
“Oh wait.”
You sit up slightly.
“What?”
“I found some pizza.”
“Oh my god.”
Riki pulls it outThen flips it over.
His face immediately drops.
“Nevermind.”
“What?”
“This shit expired two years ago?! Jezus Christ, mom.”
You burst out laughing.
“This house has no food and no weed,” he complains dramatically while walking toward the trash. “Unbelievable.”
“You’re so spoiled.”
He opens the trash bin to throw away the pizza. Then freezes.
“…No fucking way.”
You blink at him. “What?”
“Baby.”
The tone of his voice makes you hop off the counter immediately.
“What?”
Riki slowly turns the trash bin toward you.
Your eyes widen instantly.
His stash. All of it. Still sealed up in bags, sitting right there untouched because apparently his mom had just thrown it out without opening anything.
“Oh shit.”
Riki genuinely looks emotional.
“She didn’t throw it out.”
You start laughing immediately while he grabs the bags out of the trash like he’s rescuing lost treasure.
“No way,” he keeps saying in disbelief. “No fucking way.”
Riki suddenly grabs your waist and lifts you right off the floor effortlessly, making you laugh louder while he kisses you hard.
“You don’t understand,” he says against your lips, grinning like an idiot now. “We’re about to have a goood time.”
You’re still smiling when you hop back up onto the kitchen counter, watching Riki reorganize his recovered stash on the counter.
“I want sushi.”
Riki looks over immediately.
“You want sushi?” he repeats, stepping closer until he’s standing between your legs.
“Mhm.”
You hook your ankles loosely behind him while he leans in just enough to kiss you once.
“Then we’re getting sushi.”
“Exactly.”
He pulls his phone out with one hand while the other settles around your lower back automatically, keeping you close against him while he opens a delivery app.
“What rolls do you want?”
You lean forward immediately to watch.
“That one.”
“Ooo wait,” you say, pointing at the screen. “Get California rolls.”
Riki adds it without argument.
“And spicy salmon.”
Tap.
“And those fried ones.”
“The crunchy ones?”
“Yeah.”
Still, he scrolls until you nod.
“Those.”
He adds them too.
One of your hands drifts into his hair while he orders, fingers scratching lightly at the back of his neck. You keep commenting on random things while he adds literally everything you mention without complaint.
“Get gyoza too.”
“Okay.”
“And mochi.”
“You don’t even like mochi that much.”
“Yes I do.”
“You eat like two bites.”
“I like mochi. Riki.” You say, not sure if you’re trying to convince him or yourself.
Riki laughs quietly under his breath and adds it anyway, he glances at the total and finally looks up at you.
“I think we got enough.”
You immediately shake your head.
“No.”
“Baby.”
“We get hungry when we’re high.”
“That’s already enough food for a family of four.”
“And?”
He stares at you for a second.
Then sighs dramatically and adds another roll anyway.
“There. Happy?”
“Very.”
“You use me financially.”
“Correct.”
He snorts softly before finally placing the order.
The second the confirmation screen pops up he tosses his phone onto the counter beside you.
“There,” he says, reaching for the weed beside you, “you ready to get faded or what?”
He dangles one of the little bags of weed in front of you teasingly.
You glance at it, then shake your head.
“Not yet.”
Riki raises an eyebrow. “Why?”
“I don’t want it to wear off before the food gets here.”
That makes him laugh immediately.
You’re still sitting on the counter while he steps even closer between your legs again, his hands settle on either side of your thighs.
“Baby,” he says amused, “you do not gotta worry about that.”
You smile slightly at his tone already.
He leans in closer.
“This shit’s strong,” he murmurs near your lips. “It’ll have you stoned for hours.”
The way he says it makes warmth spread through you instantly.
You smile against his mouth before kissing him softly just for a few seconds. When you pull back, you’re still smiling a little.
“The other one worked pretty fast though.”
Riki chuckles quietly.
“Yeah baby, that was like less than half a blunt.”
“Mhm.”
“And my mom interrupted us halfway through.”
You laugh softly and lightly push his shoulder.
“Stop talking shit about your mom.”
By the time you both end up outside in the backyard, the sky is starting to darken just slightly.
You curl one leg underneath yourself on the gray lounge sofa in the cornerwhile Riki sits beside you, immediately pulling out the recovered stash again.
The second he opens the bag, the smell hits instantly.
“Jeez,” you say, wrinkling your nose slightly.
Riki just nods while breaking it apart between his fingers.
“Told you,” he says proudly. “This the good stuff.”
You eye the weed suspiciously.
“I don’t wanna green out again.”
That makes him laugh under his breath.
“You’re not gonna green out.”
“You said that last time too.”
“And you were fine.”
“I thought my heart stopped.”
Riki grins and reaches over to pat your head.
“You’ll be fine, baby. I promise.”
He ignores that, focused on rolling now.
His rings click softly against the lighter beside him while he works. You watch him carefully pack the joint before sealing it shut.
“Oh, by the way.”
“Mhm?”
“When the food gets here, you gotta open the door.”
You blink. “Why?”
You stare at him for a second.
“Riki.”
He just grins to himself while lighting the tip.
“Don’t worry about it.”
“…Okay?”
You shake your head at him while he hands you the finished joint.
You bring it to your lips automatically, cupping your hand around the end while you light it carefully against the slight evening breeze.
The orange glow flickers against your face for a second.
Riki watches you.
“You look sexy when you do that.”
You smile at him while inhaling. He laughs softly and lights his own.
You take another long hit confidently this time. Immediate mistake.
The smoke hits the back of your throat so harshly you start coughing instantly.
“Fuck—”
“I told you it’s strong.”
You cough harder.
His hand lands on your back, rubbing slowly between your shoulders.
“You good?”
“Mhm,” you manage weakly between coughs.
“You sure?”
“Yes.”
He still keeps rubbing your back though, grinning to himself while you recover.
The joints burn slowly while the conversation drifts lazily from topic to topic. Sometimes one of you talks. Sometimes neither of you does.
Your body starts feeling heavier against the couch cushions while Riki’s eyes get visibly lower every time he looks over at you.
Then the doorbell rings faintly inside the house.
Neither of you reacts.
A few seconds later it rings again. Still nothing.
By the third ring, your eyes widen slightly.
“Oh shit.”
You quickly lean forward to put your joint in the ashtray, but you just kind of drop it sideways carelessly.
Riki immediately hisses under his breath.
“Baby—”
“What?”
“You gotta put it down properly.”
He fixes it quickly before it burns unevenly, muttering to himself while adjusting it.
“Now you gotta relight it later. Wasting my shit.”
By the time you get to the front door, your eyes already feel warm and heavy.
You pull it open.
The delivery guy looks down at his phone first.
Then at you.
Then back at the phone again with visible hesitation.
“Order for…” He squints slightly. “Princess?”
You freeze.
The delivery guy looks awkward now.
“…Is that you?”
“Oh.” You smile awkwardly. “Yup... that’s me.”
He hands over the food while clearly trying not to react.
“Enjoy.”
“Thanks.”
The second you walk back outside, Riki’s smiling so hard he can barely hold it together.
“Order for princess?” you repeat flatly.
That immediately makes him laugh.
“You’re ridiculous.”
He shrugs innocently, still grinning.
“That’s what you are right? Ordering half the menu on my costs.”
“So?”
“So princess behavior.”
You shake your head while sitting back beside him with the food bags.
Riki laughs quietly while watching you unpack everything onto the outdoor table.
Containers everywhere. Soy sauce packets. Mochi. Chopsticks. You arrange everything carefully while he watches you with low amused eyes.
Then he hands your joint back to you.
“Smoke first.”
“I’m hungry.”
“It’ll taste better after.”
You look at him.
“Trust me.”
You sigh.
“Alright. But let me unpack first.”
Riki just leans back against the couch watching you continue organizing all the food until everything’s spread out perfectly across the table.
Only then do you finally put the joint back between your lips.
“Here,” you mumble.
Riki leans in with the lighter, one hand instinctively cupping near your face while he relights it for you.
Then he takes his own joint again.
Time starts getting weird after that. The world feels softer while the backyard lights blur slightly golden against your vision.
Riki’s head is tipped back slightly, eyes red and barely open anymore.
You’re not much better. Every movement feels delayed.
The sushi sitting on the table in front of you somehow looks like the best thing you’ve ever seen in your life.
And when you glance over at Riki, he’s already looking at you. Slow grin spreading across his face.
The second you take the first bite of sushi, your eyes widen dramatically.
“Oh my god.”
Riki’s already chewing on his own food beside you when you point at the tray.
“This tastes fucking amazing.”
Your words come out half muffled because you’re already stuffing another piece into your mouth.
Riki starts laughing immediately.
“You look crazy right now.”
“No seriously,” you say through another bite, “this is like… life changing.”
“Mhm,” he agrees lazily. “Told you.”
The weed is hitting hard now. Everything tastes better.
The soy sauce somehow tastes richer. The crunchy fried rolls are so good they piss you off a little. Even the stupid little ginger slices are suddenly very good.
“This is the best sushi I’ve ever had in my entire life.”
At one point you groan loud while chewing and let your head fall back dramatically against the couch.
Riki loses it.
“You sound like you’re getting fucked.”
“No. This better than getting fucked.”
Riki starts laughing so hard he nearly chokes on rice.
You laugh too immediately even though neither of you even knows what’s funny anymore.
The conversation keeps breaking apart halfway through because both of you get distracted constantly.
Riki reaches for a fried roll.
Misses the soy sauce completely. Still eats it.
You stare at him.
“You didn’t dip it, baby.”
“Huh?”
“You missed.”
He looks down slowly.
“Oh.”
Then both of you start laughing again for absolutely no reason.
At some point you try using chopsticks and completely fail because your movements feel delayed.
“You’re holding them wrong,” Riki says.
“No I’m not.”
“You look like you don’t know what planet you’re on right now.”
Eventually the table is a complete mess and both of you are completely gone.
You fall back dramatically against the couch cushions with a groan.
“I’m so full.”
Riki leans back beside you with heavy eyes.
“Same.”
The backyard feels unreal now.
The sun is setting lower, turning the sky orange and pink while the grass somehow looks very green.
You stare at it for a long moment.
“Why does the grass look like… that?”
Riki turns his head slowly. “Like what?”
“So green.”
He squints at the lawn for a few seconds.
“…Damn.”
“Right?”
“Yeah.”
You nod seriously.
“This is the best weed ever.”
“Mhm.”
“My eyelashes are tingling.”
That makes him laugh quietly.
You keep talking very slowly.
“And the sky is like…” You gesture vaguely upward. “Orange. But like… not normal orange.”
Your thoughts are drifting around faster than your mouth can keep up.
“And the clouds are so…” You trail off completely.
“So what?”
“…Nevermind.”
“You forgot?”
“Mhm.”
“You’re so stoned.”
You look over at him slowly.
“You are too.”
“I can handle it better.” he says immediately.
Riki grins lazily beside you before grabbing his phone and putting music on. The sound plays quietly through the backyard while the sky gets darker by the minute.
The weed makes both of you ridiculously affectionate.
Your hand keeps finding his automatically. Or his hoodie. Or his chain.
You’re halfway in his lap again without even realizing it.
Riki doesn’t seem any better. One arm permanently around your waist now. Fingers tracing patterns against your side. Pulling you closer every few minutes like he forgot you’re already on top of him.
At some point he just starts staring at you.
You notice eventually.
“What?”
“You’re so cute when you’re high.”
“You say that every time.”
“Cause it’s true. You get all slow.”
“You’re slow too.”
“Yeah but I’m still functioning.”
The night settles around you slowly.
The air gets colder. The backyard lights turn on automatically above you. Music still humming softly in the background.
Eventually you both end up laying down across the lounge couch together.
You’re tucked between his long legs with your head resting on his chest, arms folded underneath your chin w.
Riki’s hand moves slowly through your hair.
Everything feels warm and comfortable. Your eyes keep slipping shut.
Riki says something eventually, voice low and sleepy above you.
You don’t answer.
A few seconds pass then he nudges you lightly.
“Hey, I’m talking to you.”
Nothing.
“Princess.”
Riki lifts his head slightly to look down at you properly.
Your mouth is slightly open against his chest, breathing slow and even.
Completely asleep.
He stares for a second before quietly chuckling to himself.
His hand brushes gently through your hair one last time before his eyes close too.
A while later, the back door slides open softly.
Riki’s mom steps inside the dark kitchen first, kicking her shoes off quietly before setting her bag down on the counter.
The house is silent.
She frowns slightly.
“Riki?”
No answer.
“Y/n?”
She glances toward the backyard when she notices the faint music still playing outside. With a small sigh, she walks over and slides the door open further.
You and Riki are completely passed out.
Riki’s sprawled against the couch cushions with his head tilted to the side, one arm still wrapped around your waist in his sleep. His other hand is tangled loosely in your hair like he fell asleep petting it.
And you’re curled against his chest, tucked between his legs comfortably, breathing slow and peaceful.
Both of you look exhausted but very cute together.
For a second she just stands there quietly watching.
“Oh gosh,” she mutters under her breath, her eyes barely tearing up.
It’s kind of thing she’d probably take a picture of if she wasn’t actively trying to stay annoyed at her son.
She’s already about to leave you both alone when her eyes drift toward the table beside the couch.
The ashtray.
Two finished joints resting inside.
Her mouth flattens immediately.
“Oh my god.”
She clicks her tongue softly while looking back at the two of you asleep.
“You two…”
Riki just pulls you slightly closer unconsciously in his sleep.
His mom shakes her head slowly before heading back inside. The kitchen light flicks on and that’s when she notices the counter.
Several bags. Very recognizable bags, filled with weed.
All spread across the kitchen counter exactly where Riki had left them earlier.
She slowly closes her eyes.
“You have got to be kidding me.”
She walks over immediately, picking one up between two fingers with visible disbelief.
“So he went into the trash for it too,” she mutters to herself.
Another annoyed sigh leaves her while she grabs the box of trash bags from underneath the sink.
This time, she empties every single bag out of the packaging directly into the garbage.
No saving it now.
Just straight into old food, napkins, banana peels and whatever else is already sitting in there.
She ties the trash bag shut tightly afterward. Then looks toward the backyard again through the glass door.
Riki sleeping peacefully with you in his arms, completely unaware that his mom is throwing out his beloved weed stash… again.
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“riki you said it wouldn’t happen again.” jungwon sat in the dim light of his dorm, riki’s phone positioned in the cup holder his car so he could still be seen from the lower angle as he drove.
jungwon’s tone is rigid and severe, he’s completely disappointed in the news riki just broke to him. “jungwon please, i know. i know i said it wouldn’t happen again i dunno what happened.” riki’s words fell from his mouth sniveled, his hands shaky against the steering wheel and his eyes blinking rapidly in attempt to clear out the tears blurring his vision. he struggled to focus on the road, driving dangerously over the speed limit for someone who’s view of the road was indistinct.
“you know exactly what happened. you made a promise you knew you couldn’t keep. you got upset that he put his foot down and told you shit exactly how it was. you felt threatened because you knew he was right, and instead of communicating with him and accepting your wrongs you fucking hit him again.” jungwon starts. “as soon as you feel threatened you turn to violence riki. i don’t know what the hell has gotten into you, but you were never this level of violent with someone you loved. and i know you swear you don’t care about sunghoon but we both know deep down inside you love him more than anyone on the planet.” he continued.
riki sniffled through his hiccups as quietly as he could, wiping his tear-soaked cheeks with the back of his hands in silence. he sulked in his guilt, knowing jungwon was right. typically riki was easy to fight back and defend himself even when he was wrong, but for some reason, he could never get defensive with jungwon.
“and now you’re not saying anything because you know i’m right. you know i’m right, and you know i’m disappointed in you.” jungwon speaks, breaking the silence with a frown on his face. “i-i’m sorry..” riki muttered, slowing his speed on the road. “i’m not the one you need to apologize to.” jungwon says dejectedly. “please jungwon, please stop,” riki says between sobs, shutting his eyes tightly for a split second. “i know i fucked up but i literally have nowhere to stay jungwon, you can’t be angry enough to leave me in the dirt. i wouldn’t do that to you, you could catch a body and i wouldn’t do that to you.”
“if i ever caught a body you would invite everyone we know to your house in pure celebration.” jungwon snarked. “i’m not joking jungwon! please let me stay at your house, please i promise i’ll leave things as i found them and i’ll behave. i just need somewhere to sleep.” riki says.
“my father doesn’t like you riki, you know that. i wouldn’t mind you sleeping in my room but my dad definitely will,” jungwon starts. “and i can’t sneak you into my dorm. i could get kicked out of school if i get caught, and depending on how long sunghoon leaves you out it’ll only be a matter of time before i get caught.”
riki could feel his muscles in his neck and back tense up as the pressure of his tears made his head ache. “what about the lake house? you think your mom could have a little mercy?” he asks. “she’s not letting anyone stay there unless i’m there too. and i’m sorry riki i’m not taking the subway back and forth to school just so you have somewhere to stay.” jungwon says. “i’ve given so many things up to help you so many times. i know you’ve done the same, but allowing myself to struggle to help you in this circumstance is just going to enable you. i love you riki, but i can’t be the one to rub your back and kiss your forehead as you cry about the thing you fucked up again this time.”
riki nods, his tears slowing down as he tries to breath through his anxiety and makes an attempt at really hearing jungwon’s words. “you’re right. i gotta figure it out myself. i put myself in this position. i gotta get myself out of it.” he says.
“exactly. i’m glad you’re seeing it for what it is. i won’t be the one to baby you this time, but just know i am proud of you for trying to actually understand the repercussions of your actions this time.” jungwon words move through the air serenely, making riki feels a bit more calm about the issue at hand. “i don’t want you to baby me. i can’t be babied here, i fucked up.” riki says.
“right, it’s just upsetting that you only really realize how badly you fuck up when it finally effects you. you have to be better than this riki.”
“i know, i know, i’ma selfish little piece of shit and i need to get my shit together or it’s gonna bite me in the ass.” riki says. “it already did once. i don’t understand how the last three years weren’t a lesson enough.” jungwon speaks, avoiding eye contact with the camera.
riki let out a heavy sigh, his facial expression unmodulated and toneless. sure jungwon was always blunt, but never this blunt. he was honest, truthful, but never… cold. it make riki feel a bit unsafe. the one person who truly felt like home to him, felt unsafe for a moment.
sure, he and jungwon got alone because they could be blunt with one another. but riki would never go out of his way to blame jungwon’s trauma on him. to the casual human eye, prison is a place where you pay the price of your wrong doings. the eye of a 14 year old boy who never knew anything but violence, and ended up incarcerated for trying to defend himself from harm, prison was the inferno itself.
the day riki went into juvenile detention, the first and only think he could think to himself, was how we all died, and this was hell. and of course, riki acknowledged eventually he deserved to be locked up, but he also acknowledged that being there was the equivalent of the underworld. this was hell on earth, this was the living example of the abyss of hades that simmered in flames before the feet of the mortal world.
he spent every single day, day in day out, morning to night and morning again, in fear. spending his days consistently watching his back, walking around with something sharp in case someone tried to swing on him or touch him inappropriately. passing the hours and days hiding under tables, avoiding the guards who were constantly finding reasons to put him back in solitary confinement.
the evil of the small room with the gray iron walls, no windows, just an uncomfortable mattress, a tv playing the news, and a door slot to feed him his lunch. he spent at least one day a week locked away in solitary confinement, of course, until jay came along.
riki could remember it like it was yesterday. his 15th birthday, he sat alone in solitary confinement, fighting the dark thoughts in his head as the hours past. he was only let out at the hands of jay, who was assigned riki as his inmate for possible parole, since sunghoon had been starting to make his effort to get riki out by then.
first order of business, was no more solitary confinement. and of course, riki would start a food fight every now and then and get sent behind the door again, and jay couldn’t help that. but there’s was so much more to life when jay showed up, and that’s what was important. he tried, and riki loved that.
the day jay showed up into riki’s life, it was like the second coming of christ. he had no clue that this handsome gentlemen who was assigned to watch his every move would grow such a soft spot for him. he never expected it. it made him feel at home.
the feeling riki felt around jay, had always been such a familiar one, but for some reason, riki could never really put his finger on why. jay felt so fatherly, fatherly in a way that riki that recognized before, but the image of the face in his head was so blurry-and it would continue to be blurry until he accepts things for what they are, and heals for the people around him. for the people who love him. for the man who has loved him, even when riki didn’t want him to.
jungwon knows the most of riki’s experiences in prison aside from jay. there are even somethings that riki never told jay from before he came around, but told jungwon in a heartbeat. that’s why his words stung. jungwon knows about the amount of fights he survived, the amount of grown men harassing him and trying to touch him, the amount of times he got into things with officers and was reprimanded even when it was unfair to him. jungwon knows about all of the trauma riki endured behind those bars, and still somehow found enough anger within himself to say something so harsh to riki, directly to his face.
“that’s alright jungwon. i’ll call you tomorrow, or something.” riki says, not even making and effort to take the phone as he pulls over to the side of the road and takes his phone in his head. jungwon noticed his demeanor change immediately, realizing his tears have completely rationalized themselves and his body language shifting to match the flatness of his tone now. “riki, you knew what i meant by that-“ he begins to speak, riki cutting him off.
“nah it’s good. no worries. goodnight.” riki says. “i love y-“ jungwon’s screen freezes mid sentence, as riki clicks the red button on his screen and slips his phone into his pocket.
he pulled the mirror down from the sun visor above his head, looking into the mirror. his eyes and nose red, cheeks puffy and eyebags puffy. his bottom lip swollen from biting and picking at the dead skin on it with his teeth, and his forehead shiny as a result of how clammy his anxiety made him.
he quickly took a napkin from the center console, blowing his nose and taking a few more to dry his tears and sweat off his face and neck. he threw the naps out the window before closing the visor, turning off the car fully and grabbing his bag to exit the car.
ahead of him, lo and behold the orange, green and yellow sign, with the big windows and brick sidewalls. the luminous sign blinded him as he walked up to the door, the bell ringing as he entered the evan eleven building.
heeseung sat on his couch horizontally, legs up on the left arm rest as his head rested on a cushion placed on the right. he scrolled through his phone, every few seconds something new reminding him of how late it was and how he should likely be asleep right now.
he’d been alone for almost two days at this point, not a word from jake since he’s been with manon. sure he was happy they were working things out slowly but surely, but heeseung would always get a bit lonely when jake wasn’t around. in a room full of a thousand people, heeseung would still feel alone if jake wasn’t amongst the 999 others.
heeseung turns his head to face the front door of his apartment, hearing it get kicked open as it typically would when someone was entering. “hey, stores closed and i’m not making any plays tonight. come back in the morning.” he starts. “wait, i locked up at 10. how did you even get in?-“
riki pushed the door open, immediately dropping his backpack to the floor. “niki? it’s almost 3 in the morning, what are you doing here? you didn’t tell me you were coming, i told you we aren’t making plays tonight.” heeseung started, sitting up on the couch. “hey, you look really pale, like you’re getting sick. are you feeling okay?”
almost instantly the emotions overwhelm his entire body again, riki’s eyes quickly welling up in tears. “heeseung i made a mistake.” he starts, hiding his face in his hands vulnerably, like a sad child unable to explain what’s wrong to their parents.
“come sit kiddo, come talk to me. you know you can talk to me.” heeseung speaks gently, getting up and closing the door behind riki as he guides him to the couch. “you’re gonna be upset. really upset.” riki says, sitting in the middle of the couch, dropping his head to face down his lap.
“i’m sure your honest will be enough to calm my disappointment.” heeseung nods. “tell me what’s going on kiddo.”
“i- i.. me and s-sunghoon got into a fight, and, and.. it was my fault and i- i..” riki starts, his breath hitching as his hands start to shake. he his chest grows tight and his head feeling light. he chokes on his words which quickly just turn into sobs as he hides his face in his hands again.
“i can’t say it!” he cries out.
heeseung quickly brings him close, wrapping an arm behind his back and and arm over his head, his hand holding the side of his head close to his chest. “it’s alright, it’s okay.” he coos, trying to the soothe the younger boy enough to tell him what happened. “you’re okay, everything is okay. i’m here, and you’re safe. you can’t say it because you’re panicking. you gotta breath kiddo.”
riki sniffles and tries to catch his breath, before heeseung slowly releases him from his grasp. “tell me exactly what happened.” heeseung nods. “i brought a girl into the house without sunghoon knowing. and he got mad. and we got into an argument. and i felt threatened so..” riki starts. he paused again before speaking, looking at heeseung. “so i hit him.”
heeseung’s face switches from compassion to confusion. “wait, like hit him? physically?” he questions. riki nods. “i made his nose bleed. and he didn’t even his me back.” his tears drowning his face.
“you knew he wouldn’t hit you back.” heeseung speaks, his voice shifting away from the calming sound of empathy he had before. “i know, it was selfish-“ riki started. “extremely selfish riki,” heeseung stands. “have you lost your mind? he does everything for you!”
riki flinches at the raise of his voice. “i know heeseung, i need to do better.” he says. “and why the hell did you come here? you saw how pissed off i was when i saw the bruises on his neck from that guy that jumped him, what made you think i’d be okay with this?!” heeseung asks.
riki looks at heeseung with fearful eyes, staying silent while trying to withhold the eye contact. heeseung brings his hands to his pockets and tilts his head, as his facial expression turns to a sight of anger. “there was no guy who tried to jump him, was there?” he asks, his voice quiet but violent.
a deep swallow engulfs riki’s throat, and he finally breaks the eye contact. heeseung takes a step back, arm pointing toward the door. “get the fuck out.”
“no please, he kicked me out, i have nowhere to stay! he said i can come home eventually but i don’t know when and i don’t wanna be alone!” riki cries out, the panic setting back in. he stands moves closer to heeseung, begging for some kind of mercy.
“i don’t give a fuck niki! you keep fucking hurting him and he’s trying to be a fucking father to you!” heeseung shouts, riki flinching back. “i can’t sit here and enable this shit niki! sunghoon was my friend first, and trust me when i say i am not going to sit here and be apart of the reason he keeps getting fucking hurt!”
“heeseung please, i’m sorry, i promise i’m sorry! i don’t know why i keep doing these things, i’m fucking stupid, you know i’m stupid! i can’t help it! please don’t make me sleep in my fucking car!” riki begs, tugging at heeseung’s arms and shirt as he walks to the door, picking up riki’s backpack from the floor and handing it to him.
when heeseung turns around to face riki, he’s met by the tears in the older males eyes, clearly hurt at everything in his face right now.
“no niki. take your bag, and go sleep in your car. you wanna be big mr. tough guy so badly, go be tough out there. i love you, i love you so much, but you cannot stay here. i can’t even look at you right now, i am so fucking upset.” heeseung says, his voice breaking. “you’re better than this. they sent you away for three years because it was a chance for you to be better than this. please riki. be better than this.”
riki wipes his eyes with his sleeves as he made his way to the door, ashamed to not only disappoint his best friend, but his mentor and idol.
as riki makes his way back to his car, he immediately pulls the phone from his pocket again. during his drive, he makes multiple calls, all to his superman.
jay has never been the type to stay up so late. riki didn’t expect the guy to be up now. but something was so comforting about the idea of jay possibly picking up the phone. riki knew deep down inside he just wanted to hear his voice.
“please jay, please. i need you right now.” he says, clicking the call buttons on his phone through the blur of his tears, just to be met by the voicemail audio each time.
he lets out a frustrated wail, as he throws his phone at the space between the dashboard and windshield. “i wanna go home, i wanna go home, i just wanna go home!” he sobs, his right hand holding his aching head, his left holding the steering wheel as he drives in circles around the block.
even if jay did answer, it was pointless. riki couldn’t tell him what happened. riki couldn’t even tell him he needed somewhere to stay for a few nights. he’d risk reverting all that hard work, he’d risk having to go right back into solitary confinement, but truly, it would still be somewhere to stay.
his circles around the area slowed down, as he approached an area of town he very vaguely remembered. it wasn’t far from home, but he hadn’t been here before to his prior knowledge. there was something so familiar about the lineup of buildings, the specific bumps of where the potholes in the road sat, the order of the crosswalks and sidewalks. somewhere he knew he’d never been, but somehow gave him so much déjà vu.
it was only a few moments before it hit him. the road he drove down led him right to your building. once he laid eyes on that side door, he remembered all of it. he remembered seeing all those buildings pass him while he was drunk in the backseat of sunghoon’s car. he remembered his stomach turning and jumping with every hit of each pothole. he remembered each time he felt the car stop when the crosswalk lights changed to the little man symbol and gave pedestrians the okay to move across the street-and all while he was with you.
his brain replayed the drunk memories in his mind of getting to your apartment and puking in your toilet. he knew exactly where he was, and though he knew you’d probably kill him for showing up at your house right now, he knew he could at least try.
you sat up from your bed, eyes still half shut while your brain registered the sounds from the other side of the door. “y/n, i can you wake up please? can you let me in please, please let me in, i need you right now.” you heard the voice said, both fists pounding at the door lightly but still hard enough to make some kind of noise.
“what the hell..” you murmur, standing up from your bed. you walk up to the door, opening it to see riki. “oh hell no, it’s almost 4am, you can go beat your dick in the shower.” you say, starting to shut the door again. “no!” he says pushing the door open with his arm. “that’s not why i’m here.”
“really?-“ you start, finally processing the state of the boy. you notice his distressed look, and cried out face, becoming quickly concerned. “woah, what happened? are you alright?” you ask.
riki’s face drops to a downturned frown, his eyes watering up almost immediately as he shook his head. “can i have a hug..”
your expression falls, your heart falling with it. you had never seen him like this. it shocked you, and saddened you. “come here my love,” you say, pulling him into the house by his arm as you shut the door behind him. you turn on the light before promptly turning back to face him, standing on your tippy toes and wrapping your arms over his shoulders-pulling his face into the crook of your neck.
riki wraps his arms under yours and around your waist, burying his face right where it belongs, and letting all his worries fall from his tear ducts onto your shirt. “i-i’m so upset..” he sobs, holding you righting. “it’s okay baby. let’s all out, you’ve had all this built up, just let it all out.” you speak delicately, running your hand down through his hair to his neck, caressing the back of his neck gently.
after a long, much needed hug, you join riki comfortably in your bed to hear the run down of the situation. “you hit him again riki? you can’t keep doing this..” you say gently. as angry as you are, you know you can’t be hard on him. from the way he easily came to you in tears and broke down to you, you know everyone else has been hard on him.
“it was awful of me, i know. but it’s not gonna happen again. i promise it won’t. i just need to find somewhere to put my anger. i just- i don’t know.” he says, his hands tucked behind his head, elbows laid out on the pillow beneath him as he stared up at your ceiling. “what don’t you know riki?” you ask.
he stays silent for a moment, the only thing to be heard are his light breaths. “how to self regulate.” he murmurs, sounding almost ashamed of himself. “hm?” you hum, leaning closer to hear the missed words from his mouth. “how to-“ he starts, sighing. “i don’t wanna talk about this anymore.”
“you can talk to me, baby.” you say softly, in hopes he’d choose to open up a bit more. riki shoots up from his laying position, moving his body a bit to be seated against the way, clearly with the intention of moving away from you. “don’t call me that, okay. i don’t wanna have this conversation.”
your face falls to a frown, tilting your head a bit as you watch him avoid the eye contact by going on his phone. “i just want you to have a safe space. that’s all.” you start. “cut it out, you’re not my girlfriend and i don’t need a safe space. i just need somewhere to sleep for the new few nights and you’re nice enough to let me stay here.” he cuts in, his tone going cold.
you stay silent for a moment, noticing him looking up from his phone. “…which i do appreciate.” he says. you nod, assuming he had more to say past the sentence. “sorry for being mean. i just don’t wanna talk.”
“i’m sorry for calling you baby. i just wanted to be consoling. i didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable or anything.” you apologize. “it’s not that. i just don’t want… you to get attached.” he says. the pause between his words puts an awkward feeling in your stomach. “right, i get it. friends with benefits, no feelings involved.” you nod.
it was only a few moments past before the two of you could be found cuddling on one another, watching the foolishness on his tiktok ‘for you’ page. you laid over his flat positioned body, your head in the crook of his neck and right arm on his torso, your hand placed on his chest. your leg draped over his thighs, his left arm occupied by his cellphone while your right one held back up so your abdomen was steady against him. the pressure was light, but it screamed how badly he wanted you close to him.
as the room sits quiet, riki starts to rub slow circles up and down your back with his palm. your eyes glued to the screen, you hadn’t even noticed the movement-until his hand drift lower. lower past your waist, your lower back, right onto that soft area of your ass for a quick moment, before sliding it right onto your thigh.
brushing it off as a sign of endearment, you tend your attention to the ai cartoon of tung tung tung sahur on the screen. as stupid as you found artificial intelligence on the internet, triple t did get a little bit of a kick out of you.
it wasn’t long before you felt riki’s hand sliding lower to the inward area of your thighs, seeing his grip aiming for the hem lining of your-dramatically short if i may add-sleep shorts, so close between your legs. you could notice without even looking, it was something not even triple t could distract you from at this point.
you tilt your head up slightly, shifting your eyes to riki’s face. his gaze was no longer focused on the re-playing video of the dancing stick on the screen, but now to your pushed together cleavage, sitting pretty due to the pressure of your arm’s placement. his vision so focused, brain so clouded on the sight that astonished the brains of the most simple-minded species on the planet, he didn’t bother to notice that you caught him in the act.
you furrow your eyebrows, before taking a quick glance at the moving hand on your thighs. you watched his hand for less than a second, as the tent building in his pants-sitting on your thigh like if it belonged there-completely distracted you.
“i knew it!” you shout, sitting up and flicking his now hardened cock right through his sweats. “you dirty fucking dog!”
“ouch, fuck!” riki shouts, dropping his phone as he sits up rapidly, holding his hands over his crotch. you move off the bed and onto
your feet, facing riki with your hands on your hips. “i knew it! you came here to fuck me!” you say, your arms rising and slapping back to your sides in indignation. “why did you flick my dick???” he asks clamorously. “you’re trying to fuck me! you only came here so you could try to fuck me!” you say.
“what?! no! i actually need somewhere to stay!- oh, ow, mydickmydickmydick, jesus christ for the love of god, y/n!” riki whined in pain, curling over onto his side on your bed. “can’t hurt more than the vicious hard-on you’ve got!” you rolled your eyes. “well it’s not hard anymore! you just flicked my cock hard as shit! with your acrylic nails, you animal!”
“see i was right! you do wanna fuck me! go find somewhere else to stay!” you complain, turning and walking to the fridge.
riki quickly stands, right hand still hunched over on his crotch, limping as fast as his body will let him toward you. “hey no! i didn’t just come here for that! i wouldn’t lie to you!”
“oh yes you would, we both know you would!” you say, moving from the fridge to the counter. “why on earth would i lie about hitting sunghoon?!” he asks, finally reaching you. he stands beside you, leaning on the counter for support. “because you’re sick and twisted like that!” you say, minding the sandwich you were making and not even looking in riki’s direction.
“well i’m not lying! i did punch him square in his face and can’t go home!” riki says. “oh right, and you just mysteriously happened to start staring at my tits and rubbing on my thigh with your painfully erect boner an hour after you show up!” you say, turning to him with your arms crossed.
the room goes quiet for a moment, before riki speaks. “well yeah actually. that’s exactly how it happened. but it wasn’t intentional, i can’t help it you look hot!” he shrugs. “you are so insufferable. i pity you once and you start to daydream about titty fucking me!” you say, shaking your head. “well that wasn’t necessarily the thought in mind but if you’ll let me-“ he starts.
“oh go fuck yourself!” you start, fully abandoning your sandwich and trying to walk to the other way, riki stopping you. he grabs your wrist and pulls you back in, closer than before. “hey don’t walk away from me while i’m arguing with you!” he says. “listen to me alright? i didn’t lie to you. believe it or not i try to not lie to you.”
“unless it’s about where you’re going or who you’re with.” you sass, holding the eye contact. riki licks his lips and pauses for a second before speaking again, in a calm, but low and stern tone. “i didn’t lie about what happened with sunghoon. i wouldn’t lie about that just to fuck. if i wanted to just fuck i would’ve texted you that. it all happened exactly as i explained it, i just got off a little on my own thoughts and figured i could get somewhere by the end of the night since i was already here.” he says.
“well you’re getting nowhere.” you say. “and that’s fine. we don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to. and i’m sorry i made you think i just wanted to use you for sex. the friends in friends with benefits is still important to me.” he continues.
you lighten up a bit, harshly pulling your wrist from his hand to distract from the gentleness in your face, even though you already know he isn’t stupid. he already knows he can get you to fold easily. “i accept your apology.” you say, before taking the sandwich sitting on the counter and
walking away from riki.
hours pass, the sun starts to rise, and you find yourself to have gotten no sleep. riki lays on the inner space of your bed, more toward the wall, the space he always called his spot. he laid flat on his stomach, arms hugging the vertically placed pillow under his head, which was conveniently facing you.
you laid on your side, pillow pushed away and blankets sprawled out on the end of the bed, as you’re the only one to sleep with a blanket when it comes down to the two of you, and clearly your brain had no interest in winding down after hearing what happened to sunghoon prior. your head rests on your left hand, propped up enough to watch riki as he sleeps.
your right hand lingers on his back, gently laying on the softness of his skin. as you watch him, your eyes travel. from his face, to his neck, to his shoulders, down his back, and up to his face again. he was so peaceful when he slept. it’s too bad that’s the only time he’s peaceful. you let out a sigh, moving your hand from his back to the mattress and your eyes start to wander again. you never noticed how many freckles riki had on his body until now.
your look at each mole on his body, inspecting each other them for a moment before moving to the next closest one. one on his face, the back of his neck, two on his right shoulder, one on his left. his freckled back made you wonder, how many birthmarks does he have?
you life your right hand again, hesitating for a moment before moving it to his back again. your start to gently trace circles on his back, seeing the tolerance of his consciousness to make sure he wouldn’t wake from the feeling. when you realize the boy is truly sound asleep, you start to slide your fingers back and fourth to each mole ever so gently, counting the numbers like if this was a game of connect the dots.
“one, two, three..” you whisper under your breath to yourself, sliding your finger across his lower back. “four, five, six, seven, eight…” your finger moved higher to the middle of his back as you counted. “nine, ten, eleven…” your finger leading to his shoulders. “twelve…” you murmur, reaching the mole on his neck.
your eyes shift to his face to count the mole on his chin, noticing his eyes fluttering open. your eyes widen, quickly moving your hand from his skin. “thirteen. i have thirteen.” he says, his voice scraggly an deep from his wake. “sixteen. if you wanna count the two on my chest and the one by my belly button. and i don’t have any on my legs, if you were wondering.”
riki turns onto his side facing you after a quick stretch. “i thought you were sleeping.” you say. “i was. but did you really think i didn’t feel you rubbing circles on my back?” he says, teasingly. “whatever. you should’ve just gotten up when you felt it.” you say. riki shrugs. “i wanted to see what you’d do. playing connect the dots on my back wasn’t on my list of ideas though. cute.” he says.
“oh, go back to sleep.” you say, flipping over onto the opposite side of your body. “hey no, come here.” riki says through a small, low laugh. he takes you by your waist and pulls you close to him, his chest pressed against your back and his head on your shoulder. “i know you like the ones on my chest. i always feel you tapping on them with your little fingers when we fuck in missionary.”
“must you always be a horny piece of shit?” you mock. “sheesh, so hostile before 6am.” he says, planting a warm kiss on the back of your neck. “was just an observation.”
you slide your hand over the arm hugging your abdomen, curling your fingers between his from the back of your hand. “you’re so stubborn.” he smiles against your neck.
later that night, you make the absurd and reckless decision to leave riki alone in your flat, to go smoke with sunghoon and get the other side of the prior night’s story. the two of you sat in his car as always, blunt smoke fogging up the car in the typical mcdonald’s parking lot past night.
“so, what’d you do yesterday?” you ask, lighting the blunt again with sunghoon’s lighter after it went out a second time. “another job interview. the lady seemed like she liked me. she kinda started giving me a basis of the store and a general training after she interviewed me so, i think i bagged this one.” sunghoon nods.
you take a deep puff from the blunt before handing it back to sunghoon, smoke coming from your mouth as you spoke. “good shit. retail worker sunghoon.” you smile. “anything else?”
“nah that’s it pretty much.” he says. awkwardly, the car goes quiet. “what?” sunghoon asks, seeing the strained and uncomfortable look on your face. “so did the bruise on your face happen before or after you went in for your interview at the department store…?” you ask, trying to be serious, but still aiming to sound like a joke.
sunghoon scrunched his face with a smile at your sarcasm. “real funny. short answer is, i was getting one of the boxes off the shelf in my room looking for something. fell flat on my face.” he says. “really?” you say, impressed that the man who once couldn’t lie to save his life came up with someone so fast. “cause your nose looks broken. or fractured at minimum.”
“it was a heavy box. the corner almost got me in my eye.” he says, laughing your comment off. “that box had a vendetta.” you joke. “and what about riki? what’s he up to tonight?” you ask, already knowing the answer, but even more curious to see what bullshit sunghoon could continue to pull from his ass.
“home, sleeping for once. crazy stuff, i know.” sunghoon says, passing the blunt back to you. “is he now?” you say, your voice becoming thickly sarcastic. “yeah, why?” sunghoon asks.
“well because last time i check riki was sitting at my dining table eating all my pizza rolls like a five year old.” you say, tone going flat as you turn your head to look at sunghoon.
his eyes widened, his jaw clenched. he wasn’t sure what to say or do he’d been caught in the act. “he, must’ve snuck out or something.” he says, his tone shaky and nerved. “you know hoonie hoon, you’ve been distinctly good at lying. i’m proud of you.” you smile, the irony was written all over your face. “i know what happened sunghoon.”
sunghoon looks straight ahead through the windshield, his fists clenched in his lap as forced an estranged gulp down his throat. “right.” he starts. “i figured he’d just stay with heeseung or something. i never thought he’d go straight to you.”
“well, technically he didn’t. he called jungwon and of course that didn’t go how he wanted to. then he went to heeseung’s place and told him honestly what happened, and clearly heeseung wasn’t cool with that since he told him to leave.” you say.
sunghoon snaps his head to look at you, fear and shock in his face. “he took heeseung?!” he says. “yeah. i was his last resort. he said he called jay like 10 times and obvious jay sleeps at a normal time so he didn’t answer, and he stopped bothering when he realized he couldn’t tell jay so he just came to me. and i can’t tell him no when he’s looking at me with those big sad eyes.” you shrug.
the man beside you looks down at his lap as a deep exhale released from his chest. “i’m sorry i lied to you. i just didn’t want you to worry.” he says. “i’m just glad your okay. and, don’t riki i said this but, he can stay with me as long as you need him to. take the space, and take the time. you shouldn’t feel unsafe in your own home.” you say. “and get your nose checked out. that bruise is just going to get worse if you don’t.”
“yeah, with what health insurance?” sunghoon chuckes a breathy laugh, trying to lighten up the situation. you tilt your head and purse your lips, sunghoon clearly getting the memo that you don’t want to joke about this. “he can come home soon. i obviously don’t want him out forever. i just- i can’t look at him right now. i feel unsafe. and it’s like you said. i shouldn’t feel unsafe in my own home.” he says.
you bring your hand to his shoulder, rubbing it lovingly. “exactly. and i know you well enough to know you’ll freak out about him even after he hurt you, but keep in mind, he’s more than safe with me.”
“i’m sorry you have to be in the middle of this, and at the same time i really appreciate you taking one for the team. the team being me.” sunghoon says. “you and the voices in your head.” you joke, getting a kind smile from sunghoon.
“you don’t need to be sorry. you try your best for him, and now you need a break. it’s completely fine. i rather take the burden off your shoulders for a while than watch you struggle. and you struggle enough.” you say. “i guess. i just feel bad. i don’t ever treat him that way.” sunghoon says.
“yeah, but take into account that he treats you, like this.” you say, moving your hand from his shoulder and pointing at sunghoon’s bruised nose. sunghoon sighs. “i just hope that one day he won’t be like this. i love him so much, it hurts.”
you frown, nodding, but staying silent to allow sunghoon to lay all the cards of his emotions on the table.
“i just wanna wake up one day, and have him just be nice to me. he doesn’t have to love me, or care about my well-being, he doesn’t have to get a real job, or pay me, or take care of me or anything like that. i just wanna be able to look him in the face and smile because for once he was nice to me. i think my entire world would swirl in color again if i could have that. and even if it doesn’t last forever, that’s fine. i just wanna spend twenty-four hours with a riki that thinks i’m cool for once. i just want him to see me for who i am just once.” he says.
his eyes sprawl around every corner of the car, avoiding eye contact with you. he twiddles his thumbs in his lap, knee bouncing against the floor of the car. “i know sunghoon, and i want that for you too. i want it to last forever. i want him to love you and care for you and help you, even if you don’t care about those things yourself.” you start. “you deserve everything nice in the world sunghoon. and don’t let him make you forget that.”
sunghoon nods, finally easing his nerves enough to look you in the face. “you really keep me grounded.” he says. “just doing my job!” you smile.
you arrive home after your regularly scheduled motorized debrief with your best friend, seeing riki laying on your couch. his limbs spread-eagled along every recognizable edge of the couch, his right arm straight out pointing the remote at your tv. the boy was clearly bored, just clicking buttons and changing channels to stimulate his brain.
“thank fuckin’ god you’re back, i thought you left me for dead. your fucking cable sucks, nothin’ good on this tv. porn is more entertaining then the shit you got on. and my phone died. couldn’t find your charger.” he says. “you didn’t pack yours?” you say, shutting the door behind you. “i was kicked out for punching my brother in his face. i scrambled around my room, packed 3 pairs of underwear, my toothbrush and a gun. ain’t nobody was thinking about a charger in that moment.” riki says, sitting up on the couch.
“a gun?!” you say, face clearly aghast. “what? i didn’t know if i was gonna have somewhere to stay. motherfuckers go crazy in these streets.” he shrugs. “anyway, what’d the chud tell you?”
you roll your eyes, placing your keys on the counter and walking toward your bed. “you can’t seem to be nice for longer than four minutes at a time. even after you basically broke his nose.” you say. “damn, bruised that bad? i almost feel bad for the guy.” riki says, making an awkward face. “riki!” you groan, turning to face him with your hands on your hips.
“chill, i’m making jokes. clearly i feel bad if i’m askin’ about him. but serious, what’d he say? i’m one of the girls when it comes to tea.” riki says, walking toward your bed and sitting in the free spot next to where you stood. “there’s no tea. he’s getting a job at a department store, and you can go back home eventually.” you say.
“ooh, huge day for the unemployed or something.” he mocks. “i don’t give a shit about his new job, when can i go home? did he say?” he asks. “so eager to go home, just for what? so you can try to beat on him again like an evil domestic husband does to his poor housewife?” you say, sneeringly.
“oh boo fuckin hoo yn, you are just so goddamn funny. don’t be a bitch.” riki snarls. you take a deep breath and roll your eyes, knowing getting angry and arguing with him would get you nowhere with his outwardly headstrong ass. “to answer your question, no, he did not say when. and he’s extremely hurt riki. physically and emotionally. you hurt him. again.” you say.
riki shakes his head as his facial expression shifts to clear bother and irritation. “just like i always do.” he says, quiet and sarcastic. “yes. like you always do. that’s the whole reason you ended up here.” you say.
“y/n, you need to stop telling me this shit when you know i couldn’t even act like i give fuck if i wanted to. he’s a big ass crybaby and he needs to man the fuck up, alright? yeah, i hit him again and i’m sorry, i’m gonna get this shit under control but he needs to stop acting like it’s the end of the world when we fight.” riki says.
you stay quiet for a moment, truly processing the kind of person riki was through his words. sure you’d cut him some slack, you liked the dick and you know how badly sunghoon wanted you to like him, but every now and then the imagine recreates itself in your brain.
the violent scene of new york city in flames harsh enough to take down every truck in the fire department could handle. the citizens of your town wailing and crying for help, from damages that the united states military couldn’t undo. the visual of nishimura riki himself, morphing and mutating from his disgusting gorgeous human form, into an enormous titan of a villainous reptile. and no matter who begged, cried, or fought, rikizilla could not be stopped.
“you truly are the devil reincarnate.” you say, your eyes squinted and your voice low. “so should i pack my shit and take my ass back to hell?” he mocks. “it’s not like you packed much.” you shoot back, knowing exactly how to get under his skin. he hums a bit under his breath for a moment, looking away before turning his head back to you. “you know, you lucky i don’t leave right now, because if i did, i’d make sure you’d never see me again.”
“are you sure it’s me who’s lucky? because last time i checked, if you leave now, you’ll be stuck in your car until sunghoon decides to put his needs aside for you, once again.” you say. “so do us both a favor, and watch how you speak to me. one wrong move, and i’ll see parked outside of evan eleven.”
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𝘮𝘺 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘦𝘴 💭 : alright so. i’m a bit late. i can explain. after my blog post last week saying i would finish that night, i may or may not have fallen asleep mid writing session. and ended up having a really backed up week. and literally almost forgot to post today too. BUT !! after a long, tiring week, ITS HEREEEE and maybe i’ll even update tuesday again to makeup for my lateness :’) anyways, here begins the enabling of riki’s behavior from y/n herself. kinda. if we weren’t angsty enough before, i hope we’re ready to be now :3 let the crashing and burnings commence !!! or something idk. i’m planning another smau soon. maybe some funny gc stuff. i’m trying to find a good app i like for it before i start. okay that’s all !!! again thanks for all your patience and love !!!! i promiseee this week will be with all the wait for the updates. thanks for reading 💕💕💕
“lo and behold boys, the first body of freedom.” riki says, hanging your thong from his fingers in front of heeseung and jake. the three of them stood in the kitchen at the lake house, debriefing the party.
everyone had been changed and comfortable at this point, the time of sleep nearing as everyone in the house made their way to their arranged sleeping spaces.
“holy shit, is that why you were in the room for so long?!” jake asks, in excitement. “duh.” riki says, shrugging his shoulders and putting you panties back in his pocket. jake smiles widely and daps him up. “my man!”
“collecting panties like infinity stone.” heeseung jokes. “yeah, but these aren’t going in the box with the collection. these are special.” riki says. “oh really? and why’s that?” heeseung raises an eyebrow. “because they’re from the first body of freedom obviously!” jake chimes in. “you gotta frame those on a shelf.” he says.
“yeah, i’ll label them the panties of my trophy wife.” riki says, thick with sarcasm. “who did you even manage to fuck? i figured you’d be too busy entertaining everyone who showed up.” heeseung says. “sorry boys, i can’t say. this one’s gotta be my little secret. but just know, she’s the baddest i’ve ever had.” riki smiles wide and malevolently.
“is she really the baddest if you won’t tell us who she is?” heeseung teases. “yeah. i can’t tell anyone actually. can’t afford to lost her innocence to someone else. and other reasons.” riki says.
“her innocence? bro did you fuck a virgin?” jake asked. “nah she’s def not a virgin, but she for sure doesn’t have more than 2 bodies before me.” riki nods. “i knew she was a church girl.”
heeseung rolls his eyes. “so when are you gonna stop running around fucking bitches and actually find someone you like?” he asks. “shit, not any time soon. i’m gonna be the next nick cannon before i settle down.” riki jokes. “not everyone wants a wife on a private ranch, evan.”
heeseung shrugs his shoulders. “you’ll mature eventually.” he says. “hee, you had 8 different girlfriends in high school.” jake teased. “yeah, that was high school. i played the game a little in high school, sure. but i didn’t fuck all of them.” heeseung says. “i stopped dating completely since we’ve been out.”
“well two and a half years or no dating and celibacy just be to be caught up standing in the middle of the party staring at a girl you just met.” jake says, poking fun at him. “alright alright, not too much.” heeseung rolls his eyes.
“oh yeah? heeseung found a girl during the party?” riki raised an eyebrow, looking toward him. heeseung nods. “yeah you could say that.” he says.
“don’t go getting your heart broken now. you’ve gone soft, and y’know these outside shorties be hoes.” riki says. “i’m not too worried about this one. but either way, she may not even be interested so… i’m gonna sit with it until i see a sign.” heeseung says.
“smart idea. you also don’t wanna start shit either.” jake says. “that too.” heeseung nods. riki turns his head back and fourth looking between heeseung and jake with his eyebrows furrowed. “so you both know who he’s talking about right now? cmon let me in on it too!”
“no can do, nik. this one’s gotta be my little secret too. for now at least.” heeseung says. “well, i’m gonna go shower. no more drinking.” heeseung says, point back and fourth at riki and jake who are visibly intoxicated, as he starts to walk backwards toward the bathroom. once his body is fully turned away, jake and riki look at each other with a shrug.
“just oneeee last shot!” jake says, taking the bottle from the counter. riki nods with a smirk on his face. one shot turns to three. one shot always turn to three. moments later, manon walks over to the boys space.
“jake? can we go to bed?” she asks, already in her pajamas, very visibly exhausted from their fun night. “yeah baby, i’m coming. i see you tomorrow nik.” he says, dapping riki up and following manon out the kitchen. “they’re def gonna fuck tonight.” riki says to himself as soon as the two were out the room, before taking another show straight from the bottle.
you stumble into the kitchen, stills extremely and remotely drunk. you make your way to the fridge, opening the door and squinting to see what it had to offer. “what’re you looking for?” riki asks. “water.” you say. “filter’s broken.” he says, grabbing a cup from the cabinet and handing it to you. “so where the hell am i getting water. the lake?” you slur your speech sarcastically. “sink.” he says, pointing toward the kitchen sink. “don’t be a dumb bitch.” he jokes.
you roll your eyes. “you like this dumb bitch.” you say. “and who told you that?” he asks. “your dick.” you mock. “yeah, don’t take that too close to heart. there’s nothing going on between us. i don’t like you. i just wanted to get some pussy after being celibate during juvenile.” he says.
“oh whatever. i could have you whenever i wanted to.” you say, the drunkenness of your mental letting any words you could think of loose. “you really think that?” he squints his eyes. you nod. “you’re easy like sunday fucking morning. you’d cum in your pants if bent over right now.”
“you wish i’d cum in my pants at you. you’re lucky to have fucked me. to keep it real i only picked you because i knew you don’t have any bodies, and it would be easy to claim as mine.” he says. “you’re insane. nothing of mine will ever be yours.” you say. “that’s fine. you’ll see as soon as anyone finds out i’ve been balls deep in you no guy will ever wanna touch you again. what’s mine is mine.” he says.
“you’re disgusting.” you groan out, breaking the eye contact. “i’ll be disgusting. at the end of the day i’m still the best fuck you’ve ever had, and it’ll be anything more than a fuck.” he smiles, practically stripping you with his eyes.
“quit looking at me like that.” you say, keeping your head turned away, but giving him a side eye still. “i’ll look at you however you want. you’re my bitch now.” he says. “i thought you didn’t like me?” you snarl.
riki takes a few steps forward, wrapping his hand around your neck, forcibly tilting your head up to look at him, his face so close to yours. you feel a light puff of air from his mouth on your irritated face before he speaks;
“i don’t like any of my bitches. now do a favor a learn how to not talk back.” he whispers, lowly but still brutally. you don’t answer, you simply take his wrist and push his hand away from your throat, before walking past him to the sink.
once your glass was full, you left the kitchen, leaning onto walls and tables and counters as you walk, your glass meeting the coffee table and your body hitting the sofa in the living room.
you close you eyes tightly, laying over the arm rest. “hey, you alright?” a deep but gentle voice strikes, as you feel a hand on your back. you slowly lift your head and turn to see the individual behind you, smiling as your vision cleans up to the sight.
“jay!” you say excitedly, practically throwing yourself at him. you bring your arms around his neck, leaning your head on the front side of his shoulder. he wraps his arms around your torso, hugging you through a laugh.
“hey y/n. are you feeling alright? you smell like straight liquor.” he says, pulling back to see your face, still rubbing your back gentle with one hand. “yeah i’m okay. i will admit i had one too many to drink. i’m not nauseous though. and i have water. i should be okay.” you smile and not, laying your back against the arm rest of the couch. “i didn’t see you the whole party, where were you?”
“i had to keep a low profile. i couldn’t afford to get in trouble for being here. i also couldn’t miss it though.” jay shrugs. “you’ve spoiled him rotten.” you say. jay sighs. “i guess you can put it like that. the spot is soft enough for me to risk my job for him. spoiled rotten is really the only way to put it honestly.” he says.
“jay that’s terrible,” you start, smiling at him with a snarky expression. “he’s gonna keep being a little asshole if you keep it up.”
jay nods and looks away from you. “i know, i know. i wasn’t always like this with him either. i guess as i learned his past and saw who he was behind the dangerous facade i just lost the disciplinary sense with him.” he says. “are we sure the dangerousness is a facade?” you ask. “he was just being an asshole to me in the kitchen a second ago.” you roll your eyes, instantly regretting the action after the room begins to spin again.
“you know what i mean. it’s a facade once he becomes comfortable with you. kid got
comfortable enough for me to almost give up my second job just to be there for him.” jay says. “he’s really gotta get it together. he acts like he hates me and then him and all his and sunghoon’s buddies all stalk me on instagram. speaking of, i tried to find yours. had no luck.” you say, taking your phone out of your pocket.
“yeah, i only really use it to post stuff from my
second job. i don’t get too personal on there and i’m not active unless i’m posting pictures from work so it’s harder to find. it’s jonqseong, the first G is a Q.” he says. you quit trying to to navigate your phone, turning it to him with the instagram search bar already open. “you do it i can’t see shit.”
after connecting you to his account, you receive your phone again and immediately start scrolling down his posts. to your surprise, his second job had nothing to do with the law.
(insert jay ig post photo)
“jay, you make music?” you look up at him. he nods. “i’ve got a band with some of my buddies. i do mostly background vocals and play guitar.” he says. “that’s really cool, you’ve got a lot of pictures. you play a lot shows.” you say. jay smiles, clearly a bit shy. “we try to book smaller venues at bars and clubs in the city. i wanted to do it full time for a while but, it didn’t really work out that way.” he starts. “officer jongseong has a whole secret night life. i’m impressed” you say.
“yeah well i’m only 24. you guys swear i’m unc apparently, i just got my degree early.” he chuckles. “i dunno, i just see cops and think they have a wife and kids.” you shrug. “well i don’t have. a wife but i definitely have five kids. it was 6 at one point but, one of our guys ended up having to leave the band.” he says.
“6 is company. 7’s a crowd.” you joke. “and don’t start doing that thing with your hands, i get enough 67’s from sunoo.” jay laughs at your answer. “okay maybe i am unc a little. i don’t even know what that joke means.”
as you finish your glass of water, you land the glass right on the table and attempt stand. you wobble around a little bit, steadying yourself as jay stand to help you balance yourself out. “i think you should head off to bed.” he says. “it’s already gonna be 4 am, you don’t wanna sleep or late or wake up too hung out.”
you nod in agreement, spotting an open door of a bedroom with your blurred vision, and heading in the direction of the room. “do you need any help?” jay asks. you shake your head. “as long as i keep walking forward i’ll be fine.” you point to the room ahead of you. “okay, be careful. if you need help just let me know. goodnight.” jay says.
you finally enter the room, not even bothering to shut the door behind you, just collapsing onto the bed and getting under the covers. you were set to sleep next to lara that night, as sunghoon asked sunoo to sleep with him, manon sleeping with jake, heeseung with jay and jungwon with riki. for some reason, lara wasn’t in bed already where you remembered her to last be-but then again… you couldn’t remember anything.
instead of trying to find your friend, you trusted she was in a safe space in the house, and allowed yourself to fall asleep in the bed you were already present in.
the next morning, you woke up to the brightness of the sun shining through the white curtains of the room. you pushed the covers off you, shoving the mess of your hair out of your face with squinted eyes. sitting you body up on the bed, you stretch, and feel the headache and queasiness of your hangover almost instantly.
“fuck my life..” you mumble under your breath, regretting your actions from the night before. as you look around the room, you notice something. your things weren’t in this room, and neither were lara’s. on the floor was a black duffle bag, and heeseung’s hoodie he has wore the night before, alongside the blue backpack you often saw jay carry when he left his job at the station.
recognizing the items present, you freeze in your place, realizing the mistake you made. at this point, you knew you weren’t in bed with lara, but to worsen the fact, you didn’t know if jay or heeseung would be next to you when you turned your head.
you took a deep breath, before slowly turning to see heeseung still sound asleep next to you. he laid shirtless, flat on his stomach. the quilted blanket stopped around his way, showing off his back muscles. his right arm tucked up the pillow, the right arm over the area of the blanket he had pulled up to his face. you watched him for a second, unsure if you should wake him up and apologize, or just leave. if you stayed, it would be an awkward wake for him, if you left, you’d have to apologize to jay for falling asleep in his spot on the bed.
you slowly start to stand, shutting your eyes tightly as you hear the bed creak during your attempt to sneak away. “mm..? where’re you going?” heeseung hums, lifting his head off the pillow, notifying you standing off at the end of the bed.
“sorry. i was trying not to wake you up. i’m really
sorry about last night, i couldn’t see straight and i thought this was mine and lara’s room,” you started. “i owe it to you and jay. really i do.”
“‘s okay, was in the shower when you ended up in here. i was gonna carry you back to your room but jay said it probably wasn’t a good idea since you finally fell asleep and if you woke up again it would be hard to settle you down again.” heeseung said, turning onto his back and stretching a bit, before leaning on his anchored elbow.
“where did jay sleep?” you ask, sitting back down on the bed, legs curled into a pretzel. “the couch. i told him lara wouldn’t care if he slept next to her but he gets paranoid.” heeseung said, sitting up.
“i’m really really really sorry heeseung. genuinely.” you say. “no worries, i don’t mind. i was more concerned you’d think i was some kind of pervert when you woke up. you remembered more than i thought you would.” he smiled.
“did i give you a hard time? i know i’m a tough sleeper when i’m drunk.” you asked. heeseung shakes his head. “not at all. you were actually curled into a little all the whole night. it was cute. if i’m honest, i took a picture and sent it to sunghoon so we could make fun of you.” he says, turning his head away from you, expecting the consequences of his action.
“heeseung that’s terrible!” your jaw falls easily, taking your pillow that you slept with and hitting him with it. “hey we gotta become friends somehow!” he say, taking his pillow and hitting you back. your little interaction turned into full blown battle, the both of you smacking each other back and fourth with your pillows until you were interrupted by a voice in the doorway.
“yo.” riki says, projecting his voice. you and heeseung both drop your weapons, looking toward him. “quit fucking around in here.” he says. “you’re up early.” heeseung says. “jungwon just finished breakfast. come eat before i eat for the both of you.” riki says, before heading out the room. you and heeseung shrug at each other, getting up and following him out.
as the day passed, you and all of you friends decided to enjoy you day on the dock of the lake house. everyone wore the swimsuit of desire that each of packed and played the music you liked as you enjoyed the one day you had left to be in the lake.
board games and drinking sprawled out on the table of the deck, jake and riki arguing over who lost the last round of battleships and had to take a shot after getting out of the lake. manon and jay watched over their shoulders, mumbling to each other about how ridiculous they both sounded. sunghoon stood in front of the grill cooking dinner while sunoo sat on the ledge of the dock’s guard railing, kicking his feet as he watched sunghoon and kept his conversation occupied. in the lake stood lara, calling you over as you exited the house onto the dock in your swimsuit.
“come on! i don’t wanna swim alone!” she called. “i know i know! i’m coming!” you shout back. “this is bullshit niki, i took three shots already!” jake says. “well it’s time to take a fourth one, your sorry ass lost again!” riki responds. “you only won’t because you cheated!” jake says, pouting and pouring himself another shot.
out the slide door behind you came heeseung in his swim shorts, wandering over to jake’s chair and leaning on the back of it. “day drinking already? you guys are insane.” he says.
“y/n!” you hear lara shout again. your attention pulls back to her, as you speak. “i’m coming, i was just waiting for heeseung!” you say, walking over to the corner of the dock riki sat in, hanging your towel over the guard railing behind him. his head follows you with furrowed eyebrows, leaning you to look at him confused as you turn to face him.
“what?” you asked, starting to walk past him. “i’m going swimming too.” he says, standing and following behind you. “what?! but we just got out!” jake complained.
you, riki and heeseung all get into the lake with lara, you choosing to ignore the fact that riki was even there and paid attention to the new friend you had been making all weekend.
“okay so your friend wants you to get in the lake, and you wanna get in the lake, but you can’t swim?” heeseung ask, through his laughter. “we don’t come here to swim, we come here to play mermaids!” lara says. “oh so neither of you can swim?” he says, poking fun.
“no i can swim! i’ve got papers to prove i’m not infected!” she says, causing him to laugh harder. “oh y/n that means you’re diseased.” he jokes. “don’t even bully me!” you say, splashing water in his face.
he turns his head in defense, before looking back at you and raising his eyebrows. “oh really? you wanna play like that?” he starts, heading into your direction.
“no no no, i can’t swim heeseung don’t think about it!” you say, walking backwards as quickly as you can in the water. “nah, come here! come
on since you wanna fight so bad!” he says, easily catching up.
you scream out in amused fear as he picks you up, hands firmly gripped to your hips before jumping up and throwing you into the water. you come back up from the water, coughing and laughing, pushing your soaked hair out of your face. “you’re an asshole for that!”
“i gotta give you a taste of your own medicine! make it even!-“ heeseung starts, before being interrupted by the sound of another’s shout and and his own under-water bubbling.
“chicken!” you hear riki yell aloud as he jumps over heeseung’s shoulders, legs handing off the sides of his neck and pushing his weight down onto heeseung hard enough to sink his head under the water. “run while you have the chance!” riki yells out at you.
you and lara burst out laughing, her getting you onto her back as she swims in the opposite direction of the boys. “woah!” riki shouts, and moments later, you see riki’s body plunge down into the water, followed by the raise of heeseung head, and the splashing jake, manon and lara jumping off the dock into the water.
“i don’t really wanna go into the water.” sunoo says, shaking his head. sunghoon tilts his head, looking at him with raised brows as you and your friends all boo his choice. “come on..” sunghoon, says, picking sunoo up bridal style. “hoon, no.” sunoo starts. “hold your nose.” sunghoon says, before running off the dock and jumping into the water making everyone laugh.
riki raises from the water, swimming to you and lara as he sees heeseung swimming in his direction. “hide me, hide me!” he says, hiding behind you and lara. “what? no!” lara says, trying to swim away.
as lara starts to attempt an escape with you on her back, riki pulls you off of her, hands under your arms. he holds you up like some kind of shield, peaking out from your sides. you laugh, squirming to get free from his grasp.
as heeseung comes closer, riki stands straight in the water, pulling you close so you’re seated on his shoulder. he keeps his hand on your waist and pulls his arm over his head, placing it on the side of his face.
“alright lee heeseung. if you want me, you gotta get through her! and you wouldn’t hurt her would you?” he teases. “i would pick her up by her ankles and beat you with her.” heeseung says. riki folds his lips inward as he looks up at you, trying to choke back his laughter. “oh wow. that’s terrible.” you say. “well both of you are evil in this case, heeseung’s trying to throw me around and niki tried to use me as a shield so…”
the space goes dead silent for a few seconds, before sunghoon speaks. “she’s violently ticklish, by the way..”
your eyes widen, as riki and heeseung make eye contact. the smiles on their face grow slow and of evil. “no.. no!-“ you start, before riki throws you forward at heeseung, him catching you and immediately starting to tickle you as riki makes his escape. “okay! okay i’m sorry! i surrender i give up!” you shout through giggles and screams.
“alright alright, i’ll let you be.” heeseung says, a smile on his face as he eases up on you. your chest heaving from all the action. “and YOU!” you say, pointing directly at sunghoon. “you’re supposed to be on my side asshole!”
sunghoon shrugs. “hey, i gotta have my brothers back.” he says. “i’m gonna murder you both!” you answer, hearing riki laugh in the distance. “relax pretty girl, we’re just playing with you.” he says, swimming over to sunghoon and dapping him up.
“you guys hate women.” lara jokes, crossing her arms and shaking her head like a disappointment mom.
as more time passes, and the sun starts to set, your friend slowly one by one start to leave the water. first jake and manon, then sunoo and sunghoon, then jay, then lara, until it was only you and heeseung in the peripheral of the dock, and riki swimming alone a little further out in the distance of the lake.
“the moon looks crazy from over here. and the glare in the lake is so pretty.” you say, breaking the silence between you and heeseung. he nods in agreement before speaking.
“i thought the water would be cold by now. everyone got out so soon thinking we’d freeze. or maybe the hypothermia is kicking in.” he laughs quietly to himself. “we’ll find out when we head to the shore for the firepit.” you nod, smiling.
“y’know i’m not gonna lie. this has been really fun, and i’m gonna miss this weekend when we go back home.” he says. “i didn’t think i could enjoy anything in staten island that wasn’t a seafood boil.”
“me too. sunoo’s leaving tomorrow morning for yonkers to see his family before break ends so i’m basically going home to be alone. i really needed this though. i was really stressed.” you say. “well, whenever you get lonely or tired or stressed, you know where i live. you can come visit me whenever. we can smoke and get food and watch a movie or something. keep each other company.” he tells you.
you look at him lovingly, showing him you’ve clearly become comfortable in his friendship. “you know, i don’t typically feel so calm and comfortable about boys, but you and your friends have really brought me some piece of mind. i’m not really surprised though. any friend of sunghoon’s is bound to be a lovely person. and a friend of mine.”
“i’m really glad we all could be friends like this. really, really glad.” he says. he looks off into the distance for a bit, his eyes glancing between yours and something else around you. “we should start heading in to get dressed and find the others on the shore.” he nods.
“yeah we should, but niki swam off kinda far, i don’t wanna leave him alone.” you say, noticing heeseung start to shiver a bit. “you can go ahead in and warm up. i’ll get him and meet you inside.”
“okay, be safe. remember, stay close to the side of land and if you feel like you’re struggling to touch the ground you’re going too far.” heeseung says, clearly not once forgetting you lack of swimming skills. “if you feel like you’re in any kind of danger, scream.”
“i will, don’t worry.” you assure him. not too long after. you watch him swim back to the deck, climbing the latter and taking his town around his waist as he enters the house.
you turn around and scam the water for riki, before noticing the shadow of his further out into the water. your nerves started to drive as you moved closer to him, the water slowly rising higher and higher.
“riki!” you call, seeing him just a few feet away from you. he turns to face you, noticing the water at your collarbones already. “woah hold on, wait for me.” he says, swimming toward you.
“hey, we’re going inside to change. they’re starting up the firepit and- what are you doing?” you start, mid sentence riki takes you by your arms, pulling them over his shoulder and kicking into a backward swim.
you keep your arms put as your body drapes over his, his hands sliding down from your wrists, to your arms, to your sides, to your wait and landing on your hips gently. “i don’t wanna get out yet.” he says. “why not?” you ask. “‘cause, then i can’t be here like this with you.”
you furrow your eyebrows at him. “you just got done calling me your bitch earlier.” you say. “well you know i didn’t mean all that. i was just made and had to make you made too.” he starts, planting gentle kisses on your cheek and jawline.
“right because it totally didn’t feel like you meant it when you told me i was just someone you wanted to claim and fuck, and that no man would ever want to fuck me again after they found out i fucked you.” you say sarcastically.
“i mean, i did mean that stuff, i just said it too harshly. no strings attached, no feelings involved is what i meant. and that second part is true. most guys in town run from girls i’ve have ‘cause they know they can’t compared.” he says, rubbing your lower back, and keeping his face so close to yours your noses are almost connecting.
“are you asking me to be your fuck buddy?” you ask. “i guess, friends with benefits maybe.” he says. “are you gonna fuck other people while we’re seeing each other?” you question. “do you really want the answer to that?” he shoots back.
you roll your eyes, starting to pull your arms back, resting them on his chest and propping yourself up a bit. “the answer is no.” you say, grimly and flat.
riki gives you a conniving smile, eyes low and heavy. “you’ll change your mind.” he murmurs. “not if you keep calling me your bitch.” you say, tilting your head to the side, giving him a bothered look. “i’ll do you one better, you’re not my bitch. you’re my pretty girl.” he says, his smile going soft.
you sigh. “you’re gonna go right back to being mean to me after this.” you say. “you like when i’m mean to you. the same way you secretly like when i call you my pretty girl.” he responds. “and hey, you called me niki earlier. what the hell was up with that?”
“you always tell me to stop calling you riki?” you retort, eyebrows furrowed and lips curled in confusion. “well i don’t mean it. it’s fine that you call me riki. it’s the only name you know me by. you always just give me a hard time when i call your pretty girl, and i just like to have the last word.” he defends.
you open your mouth to speak, cut off by riki’s lips meeting yours. he kisses you slow, the sound of your lips smacking together lightly through the wet, open-mouth kisses you hummed through.
he takes your left hand into his, wrapping his fingers under the halt of your flat hand, while slide his right upto the side of your face, caressing your cheek with his thumb.
“such a pretty girl..” he pulls back from the kiss, a string of saliva between you as he speaks before leaning in again. he shifts his body straight as you both float forward toward the dock. your body stops fighting the urge to hold back, draping both your arms over his shoulders, tangling your hands in his hair. his brings your legs around his waist, one hand under your thigh and the other flat against your back.
your sweet little kiss converts itself in a sensual makeout, your tongues dancing back and
fourth between your mouths and quick pauses for heated eye contact and air. your breathing is heavy, and you can hear the little noises riki makes between every movement of your lips. you could feel the length of his clothed erection pushing against your thigh.
seconds later, you feel his hand slide a little higher on your back, taking one of the strings knotting to bikini together and pulling it so your whole top came loose. you gasp, biting down on his lips before pulling away and covering your chest with your arms. you look back at the house as you two get closer to the dock to make sure no one spotted you.
riki stood with a smirk on his face, prideful of his evil little act. “riki what the hell! why would you do that?!” you say, teeth clenched in panicked. “jus’ wanted to see ‘em.” he says. “no! not here!” yoh shoot back.
“aw come on, let me peak!” he says, trying to move one of your arms. you slap his hand quickly, before fully covering yourself again. “don’t be so lewd!” you complain. “so are we gonna be friends with benefits or are you gonna walked onto that dock with your titties out?” he asks.
you squint your eyes, seeing his exact plan. “deal. now please tie this!” you say, turning your back to him as you finally get hands on the latter of the dock.
riki takes the strings again with one hand, taking you by the waist with his other. he hoists your body right onto his, making sure you can feel
the hardness of his cock on your ass as he ties the strings back into a knot behind your head. “done.” he says.
“thank you.” you say, turning your head back to look at him, still pressing your ass down onto his
groin. he looks at you, flat and stern before taking you by your neck forcibly and leaning a wet kiss on your lips.
when he pulls back you smiled at him cunningly, knowing what you were doing. you start to go up the latter of the dock, feeling a hard smack on the bottom of your ass from riki’s palm. “moves like water.”
the night carried over at the firepit, roasting marshmallows and telling scary stories between shots until the sun started to rise, sending everyone back home to their normal day to day life.
that morning you left sunoo at the train station to go visit his family in jersey for the last few days of spring break. jake started his side quest with manon, which would consist of no one hearing from him during the days we was staying with her. lara headed back to her part of town, preparing for her lineup of back to back overtime at work. heeseung found himself on the long drive home by himself, mentally preparing for the week ahead without jake being present. sunghoon brought jungwon back to his dorm at university, so he didn’t have to pay for the expensive train, and went home with riki.
that evening you and sunghoon decide to smoke together in the car and get take out, as he doesn’t want to neglect your friendship but knows he doesn’t have enough time to hang out at your house with riki home alone. the two of you stay out until near midnight, before sunghoon too his responsibilities into account and dropped you off to head home.
sunghoon turns the jammed lock on the door harshly, pushing it open with force as the bottom of the door slides against the wood floor. the house is almost completely dark, the only lights available coming from the open curtains and the city outside-per usual. habituated to the dark, sunghoon’s eyes adjust quickly, him noticing an open bag of chips, a half empty bottle of dussé, and two solo empty glasses on the kitchen table.
“riki? are you here?” he calls, as he hadn’t really been paying mind to any kind of noise in the house before.
sunghoon goes silent, in attempt to hear if any kind of response would occur. the house stayed quiet, which typically sunghoon would assume riki wasn’t home once, but this time, a faint banging could be heard through the house in the silence.
“riki? hello?” he calls, shutting the door behind him, and heading into the one hallway of the house. sunghoon’s hand meets the doorknob of riki’s bedroom, turning it to the sight of him half
naked standing against the side of his bed-and what was clearly the first girl riki brought home completely naked underneath him.
“get out!” riki shouts immediately, as sunghoon shuts the door again. “are you fucking kidding me riki.” sunghoon says, not even questioning, just angrily. “put some clothes on. and get your little friend out. now.”
a few minutes later, riki can be seen walking the girl to the door. “yeah, i’ll call you.” he says, shutting the door behind her and turning around to face sunghoon, who stood against the wall by the hallway with his arms crossed. “is everything a fucking joke to you?”
“you need to stop walking into my room unannounced.” riki says. “that’s what the issue is? i’ve been walking into your room unannounced since we were kids. i’ve been walking into your room unannounced the last two weeks. you haven’t had an issue with it until now and it’s because you got caught bringing a random woman into my house! again!” sunghoon starts, dropping his arm to his sides.
“yeah well i fucking live here too asshole.” riki says, his tone deep and low but still filled with inferior emotion. “and i pay the bills. i pay the bills, i’m your legal guardian, i put food on the table and clothes on your back, i take everything of mine and give it to you and you can’t seem
to be grateful for a single second! all you can do is bring women into my house!” sunghoon starts, his voice becoming louder and shakier.
“no one told you to do any of that shit! no ones making you do that shit!” riki snaps back. “and yet i still did! day and fucking night i fought to get you out of that fucked up place and you can’t even say thank you!” sunghoon barks out, taking a few steps forward in riki’s direction.
“and what was even the point? if i am so disgusting and so terrible, what was the point in ever trying to get me out?!” riki starts. “because riki, a little part of me deep down in my heart just hoped that maybe all that time in jail seeing how hard i worked to help you would maybe make you want to be better! i just wanted you to be better, and all i got was unfairness!” sunghoon snaps back.
and sunghoon starts to move, riki feels the adrenaline in his chest start to shift around. his pulse moves with much weight, his face getting hot with anger. “well guess fucking what sunghoon? shit isn’t fair, shit has never been fair
and will never be fair! i didn’t ask you to do all that to get me out, i didn’t even care about getting out so fuck that and fuck you! i can’t ever get what i fucking want, so why the fuck should you?!” riki hisses, his jaw clenched. “i did everything i fucking could to give you what the fuck you wanted! i gave up everything i fucking loved to give you what you wanted every single fucking day! you’re just pissed off because all you wanted was to run the streets and i wouldn’t fucking let you!” sunghoon shouts.
“you know what sunghoon? none of it even fucking matters anyway. it’s been three years, three long, scary, disgustingly long years. i’m not 15 anymore. i’m 18 now, and you can’t tell me shit even if you want to. i’m grown now, and you need to get the fuck over it.” riki snarled, his tone flat and still somewhat haunting as he stepped
up to sunghoon. his face just a few inches from sunghoon’s, sizing him up as if it was a battle over dominance.
“that’s alright riki. it’s not like you listened to me when you were 15 anyway. typical nishimura refusing to break the cycle, but god forbid anyone ever calls you park.” sunghoon hisses, holding his composure and knowing he got under riki’s skin exactly how he wanted to.
within seconds riki’s ears shine a bright red color, his eyes with flames in them as he bolts forward at sunghoon.
the grip on the collar of sunghoon’s t-shirt is tight as he strikes him multiple times across his face with his fist. sunghoon groans at the first few hits, struggling to get ahold or riki’s arms. once his wrists are caged into sunghoon’s hands, riki pushes all his body weight down on to him, causing them both to fall to the floor. the two wrestle for a few moments before sunghoon gains his strength back, pulling his arms and turning him on his stomach against the floor.
“get the fuck off me!” riki shit shouts, squirming around while trying to break free from sunghoon’s grasp. sunghoon sits his weight onto riki’s lower back, holding his wrists tightly in one hand against his middle back. with the other hand, sunghoon holds his bleeding, clearly swollen and likely fractured nose.
“when i let go of you, you need to leave.” sunghoon says, choking on his words. immediately riki stops moving around. “wait, what?” he asks. “you need to get out of my house riki. i’m not going to keep doing this. you can come back i’m a few days, but i can’t let you stay here right now.” sunghoon says, lifting himself off or riki and releasing his restraints as he locks himself in the bathroom to check the mess made of his face.
riki follows, tears in his eyes, banging on the bathroom door as it shuts in his face. “sunghoon, please sunghoon, don’t do this! you can’t do this, i’m sorry! i’m sorry, i’m sorry i hit you!” he cries. “please don’t make me leave, i won’t bring anyone back, i won’t hit you again, please just don’t make me leave!”
“your car keys are on the coffee table.” sunghoon speaks, his words shaky as he tries to swallow his cries of both pain and sadness. “i’m so sorry sunghoon. i’m sorry. i’m sorry, i’m sorry, i’m-“ riki continues to cry, embarrassed to be in tears with his self awareness. he hadn’t cried since he got locked up, and to be crying over this was humbling to say the least.
sunghoon cuts off his rambling, with a quiet but honest statement. “please leave riki. i don’t feel
safe around you right now.” the words caused riki to go completely silent, his heart shattering to pieces. he managed to make sunghoon feel unsafe. he was disgusted with himself. he could hate himself right now.
“i’ll go. i’m sorry for hurting you and making you feel unsafe. please call me when you’re ready. i promise i’ll make all this upto you.” he chokes out through sniffles, feeling extremely stupid. riki was always the one doing damage, and weirdly always ended up being the one crying.
within 10 minutes, a bag was packed with his essentials and thrown over his shoulder. he took the keys to his car from the coffee table and opened the front door, looking back at the house and sighing before leaving. he shut the door intentionally with a heavy thud, to signal to sunghoon he was safe to come out now.
riki runs the hallways out the building to his car, and drives off even though his own tears blurred his vision. for the first time in his life, riki genuinely felt the deep, disquieting and disturbing feeling that was repentance.
⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘
𝘮𝘺 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘦𝘴 💭 : …well that got dark fast. we’re officially entering the arc of the book where all the questions are coming up and none of them are getting answered. prepare for lots of foreshadowing :P hope you enjoyed !!! more importantly i hope the jumping of sunghoon didn’t make you too sad 🫣 i sure as hell felt bad writing it…. thanks for reading !!! 💝💝
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Tumblr needs a collection thing like tiktok and ig there are so may fics i have liked to come back to and js forget abt them😭 and then when i rmb they’re to deep to find😭
Sorry but i will always flex tht i got nikis signed album like yes i have a paper thr niki actually touched and yes i do also very much have his engene version of the sin vanish album tht was matter a fact sent randomly haha ha ha ha ha
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