animal;

she won’t deny that she isn’t more grateful than she’s ever been to be alive, but it’s impossible to shake the feeling that there’s still something missing. worse, she knows exactly what it is and not quite how to fix it. her entire body aches, yearns to stretch out, for her toes to touch the floor and the tips of her fingers linger far under the ceiling even at their highest, but she’s trapped, stuck to the supposed comfort of her bed. she’d slept through the day, the multitude of god knows what in her system the only way to get her at enough peace to drift off. but when she’s awake in the middle of the night, alone in the silence, she can no longer pretend she doesn’t feel his absence. it’d only been a couple of weeks, but it feels like forever and a day too long since she last saw that stupid smile and twinkle in his eyes. though, the last time they spoke, she didn’t see either of then either. 

maybe he doesn’t even want to see her. she’d been told he was there when she was rescued, but that could mean anything. it’s coincidence, she’s sure, but after that— how long did he stay? did he worry? does he think she’s naive and reckless to have ended up like this? she pulls her knees up a little, not quite to her chest but as close as she can get them before the pain in her right leg especially is too much to bear. she reaches for her phone on her bedside table, catching the sight of her empty glass on the corner. it even aches to breathe out a small sigh. he’s still her lock screen. smiling at her like she’s the sun, the moon and all the stars in the sky. nothing quite like how she’d felt when she spoke to him last. 

but time had passed since then, circumstances had clearly changed. perhaps even if he didn’t want to reconnect, he would at least give a little of his time to come and put her out of her misery— tell her that this is their end. it’s the middle of the night, she reminds herself, he probably won’t even see it until the morning, but she opens their chat, anyway, and begins to type. 

it’s the simplest of messages but she rewords it for fifteen minutes, unsure how to communicate with someone you desperately want back but don’t want to push away by accident in the process. and when she hits send, she tugs the blankets over her head with her better arm, as if hiding in the darkness will make it all easier. however, a single sheet can’t protect her from the unexpected beep of her phone and at first, she thinks it’s a ‘not delivered’ notice, but there he is, a name atop the smiling face of her wallpaper and the words ‘I’m coming’ underneath. 

she hears the click of her lock moments after another message tone. it’s careful, quiet, so she knows it’s definitely him without even seeing the text. that’s when everything hits her. he’s in her apartment, on the other side of her bedroom door and— right in front of her. 

“hey,” her voice is just as rough as his, her throat dry though it doesn’t stop her from choking up. it doesn’t feel real— being alive, being so close to him again. he’s within reach, if only she could move. instead, she stretches her right arm out as far as she can, grabs at air to urge him closer as her body finally begins to tremble with loud, relieved sobs. “lucas… please come closer. it’s really you?” 

he wonders how much she knows. probably not much, he reminds himself. her sister only got a few of the details, and he doesn’t even know if she shared her little knowledge with yeji. thinking back to the night before, he feels a tightness in his throat. he recalls the absolute dread he felt when he first realized that the “poor girl” was the one person on this god forsaken island that he was willing to die for. he would have taken all of the oxygen from his lungs if it meant that she could breathe, yet that meant nothing, because there wasn’t much he could do about it. he’s just glad that she’s okay... relatively okay, anyway.

then, he wonders what happened to her in the first place. he has a million questions, but he doesn’t know if he is even owed an answer. despite wanting to ask her, he figures it isn’t his place. he hopes that she’d choose to tell him all on her own, but he didn’t want to push. after all, he wasn’t sure how fragile she currently was. under normal circumstances, lucas wouldn’t pick the word fragile to describe yeji, but looking at her right now... he was afraid that she’d shatter if he so much as softly touched her skin. he was terrified of that happening, especially if he was the one who causes it.

lucas feels unsure, lost, and confused on a daily basis, but this that he was experiencing currently was an entirely new level of it. he didn’t know what to do, didn’t know what to say... but, yeji practically decides for him, at least for now. he hates seeing and hearing her cry, but he also gets it. he guesses if he was in a similar situation, he might find himself doing the same exact thing. but, despite how bad it hurts and the way that witnessing it tugs on his heartstrings, he manages to remain mostly collected. as much as he is at any given time, anyway.

although his feet wanted to move as soon as the request left her lips, he hesitated. he continued lingering in the doorway for a short moment, though it isn’t long before his legs act seemingly on their own. his brain doesn’t even have a chance to catch up by the time that he’s beside her, but once it finally does, he’s confused about what to do again. he was standing next to her bed, within her reach, but now what? “yeah, yej... it’s me. please... don’t... you don’t have to cry.” it’s not true. she has every reason to cry, and he’s aware of that. he just hates seeing it.

This is a sentence starter meme for everyone! You’ll be able to reblog this meme until December 6th starting today, but feel free to continue answering memes after that if need be. Go wild with them and have a good time! Also feel free to use this for sentence starters or drabbles; the most important thing is to get everyone writing. Hopefully, it’ll spark some new plot ideas and interactions too!

Remember to reblog this if you’re interested in receiving a meme, and to send some to everyone that reblogs it, too! You’re welcome to skip over this if you’d like to; it’s by no means mandatory to reblog and participate. Most importantly, though, have fun!!

This is a headcanon meme for everyone! You’ll be able to reblog this meme until November 1st starting today, but feel free to continue answering memes after that if need be. Go wild with them and have a good time! Also feel free to use this for sentence starters or drabbles; the most important thing is to get everyone writing. Hopefully, it’ll spark some new plot ideas and interactions too!

Remember to reblog this if you’re interested in receiving a meme, and to send some to everyone that reblogs it, too! You’re welcome to skip over this if you’d like to; it’s by no means mandatory to reblog and participate. Most importantly, though, have fun!!

there’s so much she wants to say, so much that runs through her mind as if this is the last chance she’ll have to vocalise it. she thinks about how she still hasn’t given seulgi a chance ( and how that likely still won’t change even if she does make it out of this alive ), how she hasn’t quite accepted how she feels about lucas yet, how she wasted her entire life in gangs barely doing anything normal teenagers do. there’s so much happening everywhere — around her, right behind her, in her own head, that she’s grateful she’s holding on as her knees go weak and her breathing falters. does coughing and spluttering count as not being quiet? she tries to muffle it in her palm, pain etched into her expression. at least her captor can’t see how much she’s suffering. he probably knows from every other sign, but at least that’s one comfort. 

“s-sorry…” she mumbles, gasping when she realises. fingers over her lips once more, she shakes her head, a wordless promise that that would be her last word. but something sits a little uncertainly in her stomach. why had he stuttered? why did he sound so unsure? her first assumption is that he’s likely new to this. aren’t they all? how many execution riots has their been on this island in the last few years? she doesn’t know how old her captor is, but judging by his voice and build, she thinks he must be young-ish. if she could get a look at his face… would that even help? she’d know for sure what she’s dealing with but she’d also have a clear image to haunt her sleep. lucas… he always comforts her when she’s restless. what is he going to say about this? she continues to tremble. 

something else bothers her, though. why is it for her own good? is it simply because he won’t hurt her if she doesn’t speak? she can’t ask. is he going to hurt her no matter what? god, she feels like she’s suffocating. tugging at his arm, though it rests nowhere near her throat, she gasps for air as quietly as she can. her cheeks burn, silent tears running down to her neck, dampening gentle skin. 

this is probably the worst day he has experienced in a very long time, which is saying a lot given the shit that he constantly has to deal with. between the drug effect scares, drug dealer scares, all of the many, many scares that hydrus causes for him... he is constantly fairly fearful. however, this is just so much worse than anything else he’s been putting up with. this causes him to nearly feel physical pain in his chest. with all of the chaos all around them, he feels the consuming need to protect yeji at all costs. it breaks his heart that this is how he has to do it, but it’s not like he’s currently swimming in choices and pleasant options at the moment.

he feels a thousand times more horrible the second she apologizes and he really wishes that he was a better person with a better life and that he never had to experience things such as this. even more than that, he wished that yeji never had to experience anything like this. he wishes that she just listened to any and all warnings and stayed far away from this shit... but her desire to be independent and wanting to think for herself and not be controlled is one of the aspects he adores about her... just perhaps not in this particular situation.

knowing that something has to be done or else they could both end up on the concrete with their warmth and blood seeping from them, he made the decision to move her away from this. a lot of shops and things would be closed due to all of this, but there would also surely be a lot of looting. all residents would certainly have doors and windows locked tight, so seeking refuge from a friendly civilian while looking like this wasn’t an option. he also had to be careful, or else someone might see her with him and decide they want to be a hero and take him out... that’d be unfortunate, though also maybe not the worst thing ever. still, he would love to avoid that since he wouldn’t know if she was safe unless he was around to make sure.