THE PUREST THING

“Whats your safe word?”

That part had me weak 😂😭😂😭😂😭 

“You think I’m in pilates?”😭

“watch ya fingers bootyhole man!!” Lmfaooaoaoaoooo

Lol i need to be his friend

“Every strong man got a sensitive side”

Lmaooooooooooooooooo

“Ooo that’s cute”

Bruh I love this dude! Why is he getting arrested and is there a link for us to send money to bail him out?

Did that cat just turn into a dog with a single button press?

witchcraft 

the song is jay park - all i wanna do

What in the hell

WHAT

Aw

Look at the internet’s son engaging in real world activities 😢

My boy going to the league!

we’re doing a great job raising him tbh

Gavin, you’re doing amazing

I wish the person who I reblogged this from happiness, good eyebrows, and clear skin.

I hope you guys like…eventually live the life you want to live and I hope nothing haunts you for too long and I hope you’re all kind to yourselves

I thought I’d lost this forever. I will forever reblog.

Why can’t I stop watching this

I swear to god I’ve watched this like fifty times and I can’t stop laughing

He l p m e

I forgot I reblogged this to my main and I’m dYING

My favorite thing is that Europe is spooky because it’s old and America is spooky because it’s big

“The difference between America and England is that Americans think 100 years is a long time, while the English think 100 miles is a long way.” –Earle Hitchner

English people trying to travel around Australia and wildly underestimating distance are my favourite thing

China is both old and big. I had some Chinese colleagues over; we were discussing whether they wanted to see the Vasa ship (hugely expensive war ship which sank on it’s maiden voyage after 12 min). They asked if it was old, I said “not THAT old” (bearing in mind they were Chinese) “it’s from the 1500s.” To my surprise they still looked impressed, nodding enthusiatically. Then I realised I’d forgotten something: “…I mean it’s from the 1500s AFTER the birth of Christ” and they went “oh, AFTER…”.

My dad’s favorite quote from various tours in Italy was “Pay no attention to the tower – it was a [scornful tone] tenth century addition.”

This made me v happy

this changed me

she is WHAT? sickening

I’m not even kidding I teared up a lil

mom

[Dad: How’m I doing on your hair? Child: Good! Dad: Let’s see, do I need more grease? Child: Yes. You need more grease on there. Dad: More grease? And then what? Child: And then you gonna need to brush it, and then you put a band on there. Dad: A band on it? Child: Yeah! Dad: Aww.. Child: You’re getting it through! You’re almost done! You’re doing a good job! Dad: Aww, thank you, sweetheart, so much! Daddy’s trying, doing the best I can. Thank you so much. Child: You’re welcome! Dad: I’m almost done! Child: You been doing great! Dad: Aw baby, thank you so much, you’re so encouraging to Dad. Thank you. Child: You’re welcome. Dad: I really appreciate you so much. You’re so awesome. Daddy getting your ponytails ready for school.]

Interrupting all the political ugliness to make you melt with cute.

Me as a father

this is so pure