Thoughts Run Astray

There is no perfect ending to a relationship. No magic formula. Just a silent scream as they rip your fucking heart out

Maybe our love won’t be like the movies. Maybe there won’t be a grand ending, an airport run, a long embrace where the I love you’s come pouring out as fast as the laughs and tears. Maybe it’ll be as simple as breakfast on a weekday. You’ll be drinking coffee, I’ll be eating cereal; I’ll look at you, you’ll look at me, and we’ll just know.

If someone does you wrong, don’t try to pay them back by hurting them. Try to do what everyone thinks is right. 18 Do the best you can to live in peace with everyone. 19 My friends, don’t try to punish anyone who does wrong to you. Wait for God to punish them with his anger. In the Scriptures the Lord says, “I am the one who punishes; I will pay people back.”

It’s ironic how our hearts can still get hurt by something we’ve seen coming.

You deserve someone who loves you with every single beat of [their] heart, someone who thinks about you constantly, someone who spends every minute of every day just wondering what you’re doing, where you are, who you’re with, and if you’re OK. You need someone who can help you reach your dreams and protect you from your fears. You need someone who will treat you with respect, love every part of you, especially your flaws. You should be with someone who could make you happy, really happy, dancing on air happy.

I don’t like being asked the same thing twice. I like people to understand at the first word. Some things can’t be explained.

Just to say I love you never seems enough. I’ve said it so many times. I’m afraid you wont understand what I really mean when I say it. How can so much feeling, so much adoration possibly fit into those three little words. But until I find some other way of saying how I feel, then “I Love You” will have to do. So no matter how many times I say it, never take it lightly.

I know you love me now - but one day you won’t and that’s what terrifies me. Hearing the words serves only as a reminder of what I have to live my life without. I’ve already lost so much… and you wonder why I’m so afraid. You don’t understand; telling me you love me means I still have more to lose.

Sure I loved him - too much. And he loved me, only not enough. I just want someone who thinks I’m number one in his life. I’m not willing to accept emotional scraps anymore.

~ DOES LOVE ALWAYS GO? ~ Someone asked me that today and it took me a moment to think about it… but my answer is no, love doesn’t always go. Sometimes it does, I won’t deny that. Some people are fickle and love with a light heart that floats on to something else almost as soon as the wind changes. But not everyone loves that way… There are those who love deeply, with everything that they are; and for them, love is timeless. It never ages, it never gets bored, it never ‘finds somebody better’, it never fades away and it certainly never gives up just because things got tough. But it also hurts sometimes… It hurts in ways you can’t possibly imagine and when it does I can almost understand why those who are capable of it choose to let go… Sometimes I almost envy them… But I’ve never been one of those people. I so rarely let anybody in, but if you’re one of the few people to find your way into my heart – then you’re there to stay until my final breath. And I don’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thing…? I don’t know if it’s beautiful or sad to think that one day, many years from now, my last thoughts will most likely be of someone who no longer thinks of me at all…