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I’m in a period in my life where I’m finally alone and I’m thriving. But I’m meeting so many new people and I’m not ready to give up my alone time for people again. I haven’t had myself to myself in forever. But people are so awesome. I just have no place for them right now when I’m so in love with hanging out with myself. Blocked the ex’s number and I finally feel like I can breathe a little. It’s been too long since he’s not been an attachement to me. He said it was okay I did that.. it makes me feel better running it by him. I don’t want to hurt his feelings. He understands. We’re also not dating so please. Thank god for this. There’s so many big questions for the future and right now I don’t want it. I’m trying to make him see why I won’t want it because talking to him doesn’t get through to him. I’m hoping he can make the instrospectional realizations himself. I bought a dating course from a psychologist I trust, and I gave him access to it. Hoping he’ll take it. Not for me... just so that he can be better. I’m tired of wanting him to be someone he’s not but if I can help him become more self aware then he can have a good relationship in the future sometime and that is all I want for him. I want him to be happy. I can’t give that to him when I feel so depleted after because I get nothing in return. That’s not how love works and he doesn’t believe me when I say I’m tired. Maybe me not being around will give him more space to think about the reality of unbalance that our relationship was.