you can call me del or fearnes, i'm very friendly and only sometimes bite. i'm 27, queer, happily married. i try to write fic and post lil headcannons in between my many jobs (logistics coordinating a nonprofit, working with kids, owning and operating a different nonprofit, making theatre)
it's all sapphic here all the time - (the pitt mostly, sometimes d20 and crit role)
generally 18+, so mdni please :)
below the cut is a lil master list of things i've written
Working On It - established relationship garsanshimi hurt/comfort long fic
part one
part one, but on ao3
garsanshimi things
pwhl fans
mother's day
moving in together
secret relationship (currently in progress as a long fic)
mechanical bull
massages
late to work
learning each other
shower not-sex
caffeine intake
mel and becca
family wedding
having another kid
garsantos
hands
barantos
first time
and all my other really short headcannons are tagged #tiny hc
and also my ao3 is here, though i haven't posted anything in a loooong time
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Two and a half years after permanently joining the staff at PTMC, things are going better for Baran than she ever could have expected. She has an amazing kid, a demanding but rewarding job, two incredibly wonderful and hot girlfriends. Everything has it's place, her life is ordered and routine. It's great. Things are great. As long as everything stays in its assigned box, things will continue to be great. Right?
Maybe the status quo isn't working anymore.
[18+ . MDNI . 5.7k words . part one here . both parts on ao3 here]
this part is much smuttier! heads up for spitting in mouth, oral, fingers in mouth, strap-ons, strap sucking, and use of Daddy as an honorific
Baran doesnât sleep. Which isnât surprising, even if she wishes it were different. Honestly, she canât remember the last time she was the only person sleeping in this houseâ between Jasperâs nights with her and her sleepovers with Yolanda and Trinity, sheâs never alone at night. Itâs the quiet, she tells herself when sleep proves itself hard to come by. The quiet, not the fight. And had it even been a fight? Or had it been Trinity having a conversation they had had before? Baran had just reasserted her position. She tells herself it was good that she left, that Trinity and Yolanda had needed time to talk about things without her there. Tells herself she was right. Ignores the ache in her chest that begs her to consider she might not be. When telling herself things becomes useless, and the ache grows too strong, she gives up on sleeping in her bed. Makes a cup of tea and gets comfortable on the couch, a documentary she thinks sheâs probably seen before on the TV.
Sheâs still on the couch when Yolanda comes the next morning. Flat on her stomach, tea half-empty and cold on the coffee table, screensaver bouncing around the TV. She stirs at the sound of the front door unlocking, brain coming back to consciousness enough to register her alarm system chirping before it's disarmed. Realizes who that means, and buries her face in the couch cushions beneath her.
âGood morning,â Yolanda says as she sits on the edge of the couch next to Baran, a hand coming to rub gently up and down her back.
âMorning.â Baran rolls to her side, curls a little around Yolanda to give her more room to sit. There are bags under her eyes, and they seem a little puffier than normal. If Yolanda is carrying signs of last night on her face, then Baran supposes she must look even worse. âWhat are you doing here?â
âI wasnât sure if storming out last night meant you also cancelled our run,â Yolanda says. âThought I better come over and check. I brought coffee.â She nods to two cups on the table.
âCoffee?â Baran raises an eyebrow. Coffee, any caffeine really, was a rare indulgence for her.
âI didnât sleep very well last night,â Yolanda brings her hand to Baranâs face, thumb tracing gently over one of her eyebrows. âFigured you didnât either.â
Baran shakes her head and leans into the touch. âTrinity?â she asks, a ball of guilt settling in her chest.
âSheâs sleeping now,â Yolanda says simply. âHow are you doing?â The look she gives Baran when she asks is so loving, so open, that Baran almost turns away.
âI should be asking you that,â she says instead.
âMaybe, but I asked first.â
Baran turns her face to place a kiss against Yolandaâs palm. In truth, she doesnât really know how she is. Her position hadnât changed, she believed everything she had said the night before. But the way she had said things, well. There was a lot to atone for in the cold light of the morning. Baran shrugs. Kisses her hand again.
âGreat, go get dressed.â Yolanda stands from the couch, reaching out her hands to help Baran up. âIf weâre not gonna talk, weâre gonna run.â
Baran canât come up with a good reason to say no, so she doesnât. Just accepts Yolandaâs hands and stands up. Goes upstairs to her room to fish out something suitable to run in. Listens to Yolanda busy herself in the kitchen, unloading the dishwasher. She doesnât let herself think too long about the warm feeling that gives her.
---------------------
Trinity is there when they get home. Sheâs sitting on the front steps, though sheâs clearly already been inside; a glass of water from Baranâs kitchen is on the steps beside her. Baran stops in front of her while Yolanda continues inside, dropping a hand briefly on Trinityâs head as she goes. Wordlessly, Trinity offers up the glass. Watches intently as Baran drinks it all.
The run had been hard. She and Yolanda almost always ran on their days off together, the same 5-mile loop through her neighborhood and along the river. Usually the pace was easy, more about moving their bodies and spending time together than anything else, easy to keep up conversation. Baran hadnât known what to say today, though, and clearly Yolanda hadnât either. And so they had pushed each other, pacing faster and faster until they were done. Baran thinks it's probably the fastest sheâs ever run five miles.
She doesnât think itâs made her feel better, just different. Like some of the guilt and shame thatâs been sitting in her chest since last night has synthesized into more concrete thought. Into things she probably has to say. She doesnât think she knows how, yet.
Trinity stands up and puts her hand out for the glass when itâs done. Baran parts her lips to speak, but Trinity kisses her before she can. And, well, Baranâs lips were already open, so itâs not hard for her to reach out and drag her tongue along Trinityâs lower lip. Not hard to slip inside her mouth when her lips part, too. Baran fights against the part of her brain that is incessantly reminding her that they are outside where her neighbors can see. She just pushes her lips harder against Trinity. It lasts just a second longer, with Trinityâs free hand resting on Baranâs hip, before the younger woman is pulling away. âGo shower,â Trinity says with a small smile, and steps away fully.
Baran wants to ask her to come with, but sheâs still not entirely sure where they stand after last night, and so for the second time today, she finds herself alone in her room at the direction of one of her girlfriends. It feels lonelier than it had earlier this morning. Maybe because now theyâre both here, downstairs, even after she had stormed out on them. She feels off balance.
The hot water only runs over her for a few seconds before she realizes itâs not going to ground her in the way she needs. So she goes through the barest minimum of steps, leaves her hair pulled up in a bun and unwashed, grabs the first t-shirt and pair of denim shorts she sees when she opens her closet. Returns back downstairs twenty minutes later, determined.
Theyâre both on her couch, curled together in almost a mirror of last night. Trinity is upright this time, hand stroking idly along Yolandaâs bare arms, the surgeonâs head resting on her shoulder. The sitcom on the TV gets switched off when Baran enters the room. Two sets of eyes turn to her expectantly as Baran crosses to stand in front of them. She hesitates for a second before slowly sinking to her knees, ankles complaining as she sits all the way back on her feet, one hand coming to rest on each of their legs.
âIâm sorry,â she says, making eye contact with Trinity. Then turns to Yolanda. âIâm sorry,â she repeats. Yolanda nods, still tucked close to Trinity.
âIâm sorry, too,â Trinity says as she reaches up to tuck a stray curl behind Baranâs ear. Leaves her hand resting on her cheek. Thereâs a long pause, heavy silence as the three of them sit with this step towards reconciliation. The energy is closer to their baseline than itâs been in days. Not fully, but closer. âI donât really wanna talk about it now,â Trinity says after a long moment.
Baran nods, swallows the words that had been on the tip of her tongue. âWhat do you want, love?â she asks instead.
Trinity thinks for only a second. âI want to turn my brain off,â she says, voice lower than it had been a moment ago.
Itâs a request Trinity has made countless times before. One that usually leaves heat pooling immediately in Baranâs stomach, overwhelms her with need. Today it just strikes panic. Theyâve said theyâre sorry, but Baran feels too vulnerable, too raw, too undeserving of Trinityâs submission. She needs to atone, to give, not take. Baranâs eyes go wide, and she seeks out Yolanda, prays the other woman will see that she canât take from Trinity. Not right now, not yet.
To her credit, Yolanda picks up on it immediately. âAnd what do you want?â she asks, hand coming up to cup Baranâs other cheek.
Baran feels heat rush to her face, bracketed as it is in both of her girlfriendsâ hands. âI want to turn my brain off, too,â she says, dipping her chin a little, looking up at Yolanda and Trinity through her lashes. âWant to make it up to both of you.â
Above her, Trinity gasps. Turns her head quickly to look at Yolanda, making sure the woman will comply with the request. Gets to watch the moment her eyes darken. This is not new, but it is rare. Baran Al-Hashimi, dedicated mother, exacting attending physician, and singularly focused partner, does not give up control. She demands excellence from everyone she meets, takes broken systems and controls what she can to fix what she can. She has high standards for everyoneâ for no one more than herself. She does not bend.
She will bend today.
Yolanda nods once, and drops her hand, sitting up straighter as the weight of whatâs being given to her settles in. âGo wait on the bed,â she says to Trinity. âWeâll be there soon.â Trinity goes without another word, barely contained excitement playing across her face.Â
âCome here,â Yolanda directs once sheâs gone. Baranâs knees protest as she stands, and Yolanda holds both hands out to help her, gently pulling the older woman down to straddle her lap. âAre you sure?â
Baran wants to shy away from the eye contact being leveled at her, their faces only a few inches apart now. But she knows this check in is important, knows Yolanda wonât do anything unless sheâs sure. âI am,â Baran nods. âI want to make it up to her. And to you.â
âYou donât have to,â Yolanda says. âWeâve forgiven you. I wonât punish you for last night. If you want the control, weâre both happy to give it.â
âI donât want it,â she asserts. âItâs not about punishment itâsââ she cuts herself off, choosing her next words carefully. âYou both give so much to me. Not just thisâŚâ she gestures between them, grabs Yolandaâs hands from where theyâve settled against her thighs. âBut in so many ways. All the time. And now Trinity wants to turn her brain off, wants to give even more, and I just. I canât take it from her. Not right now. I need to give, too. Need to show you both how much I love you. Please let me,â she begs.
âOkay,â Yolanda says.
âOkay?â
âOkay. But if the giving starts to feel like too much, if you need to come back to yourself, promise me youâll ripcord out of there.â
âI promise,â Baran says. âThe same goes for you, you know. It can get intense for me sometimes, with both of you. Just say the word and weâllââ
âI will,â Yolanda cuts her off, bringing her hand up to cup Baranâs jaw. âAre you ready?â
Baran nods, and the grip on her jaw turns firm as Yolanda raises an eyebrow. Heat surges through Baranâs body, her limbs and head feeling almost weightless as everything concentrates in her center. âYes,â she sighs out, nodding again. Itâs not enough of an answer for Yolanda, who tightens her grip further still and rests her thumb on Baranâs bottom lip. She knows what the surgeon is waiting for, knows sheâs on the precipice of giving in fully. She takes in a shaky breath and lets it happen. âYes, Daddy,â she exhales.
âGood,â Yolanda says, âletâs go.â Sheâs moving before Baran has a chance to react, standing and letting the older woman fall clumsily off her lap. She waits impatiently by the bottom of the stairs as Baran finds her feet, and directs her up the stairs first, one hand on either side of her hips.
The sight that greets them when they reach the bedroom takes Baranâs breath away. Trinity is sprawled in the center of the bed, completely naked. Eyes shut tight, one hand is tugging hard at her nipple while the other rubs furious circles between her legs. Judging by the flush creeping up her neck, sheâs close. Yolanda stops a few feet from the end of the bed and pulls Baranâs back flush to her front. One arm wraps around her waist while the other loops over her shoulder, pressing into Baranâs sternum. They stand there for a moment longer watching Trinity work herself up even more. Baranâs body hums with energy, wanting to jump on the bed, replace Trinityâs hands with her own. Thereâs sweat pooled at the base of Trinityâs throat between her collar bones, and the need to lick it is so overwhelming that for a second Baran forgets and goes to take a step forward. Yolandaâs hold on her tightens, pulling her back as she tsks disapprovingly.
âBaby,â Yolanda says, and Trinityâs eyes snap open. Her flush turns a darker shade of red, but she doesnât stop. âDid I say you could do that?â
âYou didnât say I couldnât,â Trinity gasps. âYou guys were taking a really long time.â
âHmm, I donât think it was that long,â Yolanda hums. âDo you think it was that long, B?â
âNo, Daddy,â Baran sighs. Her vision is fuzzy around the edges, she needs to get to Trinity.
âYou need to stop now,â Yolanda says.
âMake me.â Baran feels Yolandaâs arms twitch against her, feels the huff of breath pushed out of her nose as Trinity says it.
Yolanda drops her lips to Baranâs neck, kisses once, open-mouthed just behind her ear, before releasing her grip. âGo on,â she says, pushing Baran towards the bed. Baran moves without thinking, relief flooding through her as she sits on the bed just above Trinityâs head. She grabs each of Trinityâs wrists, smiling when sheâs met with no resistance, and pulls them into her lap. She leans over Trinity, is about to finally drag her tongue down the younger womanâs neck when Yolanda speaks. âStop,â she directs. âWait for me. No touching. Am I clear?â
âYes, Daddy,â Baran says immediately, eyes locked on Trinityâs.
âYouâre not who Iâm worried about, baby,â Yolanda laughs.
âYes, Daddy,â Trinity whines a moment later. She whines again when Yolanda leaves for Baranâs walk-in closet without saying the expected âgood girl.âÂ
It feels like forever and no time at all that theyâre stuck like that. Trinityâs hands, wrists held together loosely by one of Baranâs hands, twitch every so often in her lap. Both of them are breathing shallowly. The look in Trinityâs eyes is one sheâs familiar with, pupils blown wide, unfocused, almost glassy with desire, waiting for her next instruction. Baran has brought that look out of her countless times. She wonders if Trinity recognizes what she can see, or if Baranâs face is different, somehow, in this new dynamic.
An eternity later, or immediately, Yolanda is returning, having traded her clothes for the little box of supplies that Baran keeps tucked in the back of her closet. She drops the box unceremoniously on the nightstand and comes to stand between where Trinityâs legs hang off the edge of the mattress. âLook at me,â she instructs, and both pairs of eyes snap to her face. âAre you going to listen now, baby?â Yolanda asks, fixing Trinity with a hard stare.
âYes, Daddy,â Trinity nods emphatically. âIâm so sorââ sheâs cut off by Yolanda holding two fingers up.
âSave it,â Yolanda says. Baran feels drunk, watching with hooded eyes as Yolanda places her fingers against Trinityâs center, circling her clit once, twice, before dipping lower. She pushes in, Trinityâs moan almost covering the obscene squelch from her soaked folds, wrists straining against Baranâs grip. Yolanda withdraws as quickly as she went in, fingers coming away glistening, a string of fluid hanging between her fingers as she separates them slightly. Trinity whines at the loss of contact.
If Baran thought the need to lick up Trinityâs sweat had been bad, this was ten times worse. Most of her conscious thoughts are gone, replaced instead with pure primal want. Her lips part and she sucks in a shaky breath, about to speak, to beg, when Yolandaâs gaze shifts to her, silencing her. Yolanda must see the need plain on her face, because she brings her fingers to Baranâs mouth, pushing past her lips without preamble. Baran moans, the heady taste of Trinity on Yolandaâs skin overwhelming her. She sucks like her life depends on it, wraps her tongue around and between Yolandaâs fingers until sheâs sure sheâs got it all. Too soon, Yolanda is withdrawing her fingers to wrap around Baranâs jaw instead, guiding her to rest higher up on her knees, drawing her in for a kiss.
Itâs sloppy, and delicious, all teeth and tongues and spit, and Baran almost forgets Trinity is there, releasing her hold on the younger woman to instead clutch at Yolandaâs hips, her arms, her hair. Anywhere she can reach. The kiss ends when Yolanda pulls back with a gasp, looking down sharply at the woman below them. Baran lets her gaze follow, and sees that with her hands free, Trinity has taken the opportunity to grab at Yolandaâs thigh, fingers aimed up at her center. âHands to yourself,â Yolanda snaps. Trinity whines, but listens, tucking her hands under her own lower back to contain them.
âPlease,â Trinity begs, chest heaving.
âFeeling left out?â Yolanda raises an eyebrow. Trinity just nods and whines again. âDonât worry, weâll share.â Then Yolandaâs mouth is on Baranâs again, impossibly wetter than before, pushing spit past Baranâs lips before pulling back again, the hand on her jaw pushing up on her chin to close her mouth. It snakes around to grip the hair at the base of her skull and she directs Baranâs head to hover over Trinityâs face. Yolandaâs other hand has come up to grab Trinityâs jaw and force her mouth open. The hand in Baranâs hair tightens and she knows whatâs expected of her, letting the spit in her mouth pool behind her lips and slip out, dropping heavily onto Trinityâs waiting tongue. âGood girl,â Yolanda says when Trinity closes her mouth and swallows. Trinity lets out a sob.
Yolanda steps back then, tilts her head as she takes in the scene before her. Trinity is still flat on her back, hands tucked underneath her, slick glistening between her thighs. Meanwhile, Baran still has all her clothes on, hands fisted in the hem of her shorts, kneeling near Trinityâs head, a stray string of spit hanging from her lip. They look wrecked already, tracking Yolandaâs movements as she opens the box on the nightstand and pulls out the already-prepared harness inside with hazy, love-drunk eyes. She laughs. Sheâs hardly even touched them. âYou,â she taps Trinityâs leg gently, âlay against the pillows. And you,â she directs, turning to Baran. âNeed to get undressed.â
Baran nearly falls off the bed in her haste to get off of it, grateful to have something to do. Yolanda catches her elbow, steadying her and helping her untangle her foot from where it got caught in the comforter. She meets Baranâs gaze for a moment, pretenses and roles dropped, eyebrows raised in a silent check-in. Baran just nods, reassuring. She canât imagine being anywhere else, doing anything else right now. Everything thatâs happened so far, everything she expects to happen still, sets her bones alight with its rightness.
By the time her clothes are off and tossed to some random corner of her bedroom, Trinity is pressed back into the pillows and Yolanda is tightening the straps of the harness around her hips. âNow hereâs how this is gonna go,â Yolanda says low in Baranâs ear, pulling Baran to her, back to front, the dildo between Yolandaâs legs pressing firmly against her hip. âIâm going to fuck you, and youâre going down on her,â Yolanda inclines her head toward the bed. Baran chokes down a moan. âAnd all Trinity has to do is keep her hands to herself,â Yolanda says a little louder, so Trinity can hear.
âNo, please Daddy, please let me,â Trinity begs. âI promise Iâll be good, just let me touch.â
âYou already had a chance to be good,â Yolanda says. âAnd you didnât take it. So now youâll keep your hands to yourself. Am I clear?â
Trinity chokes on another cry, but dutifully tucks her hands back away as she lets out a broken âyes, Daddy.â
âAre you ready, love?â Yolanda says into Baranâs ear, leaning down to pepper kisses on the side of her face, teeth lightly scraping over her earlobe as Baran nods. âGood girl,â Yolanda chuckles quietly. And oh, Baran hadnât realized what hearing that would do to her. Praise was always Trinityâs thing, the youngest of the three blooming under the slightest compliment. Sheâs heard Yolanda say it countless times, but never at her. Hearing it now, Baran melts. Her thoughts become even more of a haze. She wants to be good, she needs to be good, for Yolanda, for both of them. They deserve it, her goodness. She has to give it to them.
Yolanda helps her move to the bed, laying her down between Trinityâs legs, placing a pillow under her hips, hands running all over, stroking her back, her legs, her hips. When Yolandaâs fingers knead Baranâs inner thighs, she jumps, and her head falls from where it had been resting on Trinityâs thigh to her center. Above her, Trinity gasps, and while Baran supposes some part of her had been waiting for Yolanda to say she could start, she canât wait any longer. Pulling Trinityâs legs over her shoulders, she dives in with a focus usually reserved for Trauma rooms.
Baran is so lost in itâ in the whines falling from Trinityâs mouth, in the way her legs shiver and jump around her head, in the way sheâs getting impossibly wetter, slick and spit coating Baranâs face, running down her neckâ that she almost misses Yolanda get on the bed behind her. Her brain doesnât really even catch up to whatâs happening until thereâs hands back on her thighs, pulling her legs farther apart before the head of Yolandaâs strap is pressing against her entrance. She moans into Trinity, but is determined not to lose focus as Yolanda pushes in deeper, the stretch burning her from the inside out. Yolanda gives her a moment to adjust but eventually begins to pick up the pace, and Baran moves her tongue from where itâs been drawing careful tight circles over Trinityâs clit to push inside of her instead, matching Yolandaâs thrusts into her. Trinityâs earlier activities had worked her up plenty, and once two of Baranâs fingers replace her tongue on her clit, sheâs coming hard, walls fluttering and pushing against the tongue inside her.
The sounds that fall out of Trinityâs mouth as she comes are music, and Baran would do anything to hear them again. So she does. Or rather, she doesnât stop, continuing to lick and suck as Trinity rides through her orgasm, never breaking pace, never pulling back. âPlease, please, please, Daddy,â Trinity is begging above her, voice breaking. Baran thinks she might be crying. She isnât going to raise her head to check, though, pushes down the rising tension in her own center in favor of sucking hard on Trinityâs clit. Sheâs worried Yolanda will give in to Trinityâs demands and pull her off, and that is not something Baran is willing to let happen. At least not until the younger woman comes again. âPlease, just let me touch her,â Trinity cries. Oh.
âGo ahead, babygirl,â Yolanda grits out between thrusts. And then Trinityâs hands are in Baranâs hair, slipping between her bun and her scalp, pulling her head closer to Trinityâs center, adjusting the angle in a way that has Trinity moaning even louder.
With Trinityâs hands in her hair, the arms Baran has wrapped around her thighs feel less necessary for support, so she releases one, letting her hand move towards Trinityâs chestâ itâs stopped before she reaches her destination. Yolandaâs hand on her wrist drags Baranâs arm the opposite direction, helping her to position it instead between Baranâs legs before gripping her hips again. She whines into Trinityâs clit and the hands in her hair tighten. Even in her hazy state, Baran understands the surgeonâs intention, understands that Yolanda knows she canât get off without some added stimulation, but sheâs not ready. Sheâs not coming until Trinity does at least one more time, maybe two.
So she leaves her hand still, which apparently wasnât an acceptable thing to do, because Yolanda is smacking lightly against her backsideâ not enough to hurt, but enough to get her attention. âCome on, B,â Yolanda says. âAre you going to help, or do I have to do all the work myself?â
She wasnât going to answer, that would be interrupting the task at hand, but Trinityâs hands in her hair pull her head up long enough that she can get out a quick âNot yet.â Before diving back in.
âBaby,â Yolanda says from behind her and Baran isnât really sure who sheâs talking to, but she also isnât really sure that she cares. âDonât let her help you unless sheâs also helping herself.â
Trinity pulls her off again, and Baran stops herself from letting out a frustrated whine. âPlease,â she says instead, trying to fall back down, stopped this time by Trinityâs grip on her head.
âNo oneâs trying to stop you,â Yolanda sounds a little out of breath; she hasnât stopped thrusting into Baran through their conversation. âYou know what you have to do.â Baran does whine then, but she starts to move her fingers against her clit, making sure her arm moves enough that Trinity can see it. Moans out something that might be thanks when her mouth is allowed to return to Trinity.
Itâs harder to focus like this, the heat coiling low in her stomach becoming harder to ignore, but she does her best anyway. The growing uncoordination of her movements as her body gives over to feelingâ Yolandaâs grip on her hips, her own fingers against her clit, the strap thrusting in over and overâ doesnât seem to matter much to Trinity, if the fluttering hands in her hair and the increasing pitch of her moans are anything to go by. A few more minutes of this and Trinity will come again and then Baran will let herself fully give in to the sensations between her legs and thenâ
Sheâs ripped away again, Yolanda gripping her by both shoulders and pulling her all the way back onto her knees, pressing Baranâs back to her front. âPlease,â Baran whines, trying desperately to reach back down to Trinity, now infuriatingly out of reach.
âBaby, you stopped the second Trin let go,â Yolanda chides in her ear. Sheâs stopped thrusting entirely now, focused instead on keeping Baran upright against her even as the older woman struggles to lay back down.
âNo I didnât, I was,â Baran says, trying to think back. âOkay I wasnât moving, but I could still feel.â It feels like a miracle sheâs able to string the sentence together. âPlease, just. Just one more, then we can focus on me. Promise.â She struggles in Yolandaâs grip again, but doesnât get anywhere. Below her, Trinity has taken Yolandaâs permission to touch to heart, and has replaced Baranâs mouth with her hands.
âHmm, seems like youâve forgotten who you put in charge,â Yolanda teases, thrusting her hips once, sending a shockwave through Baran. âI thought you were going to be good?â
âI was, I am, fuck,â Baran whines, lost. She can see Trinity getting closer without her, and itâs not fair, she needs to be down there, needs to feel her fall apart on her tongue. âPlease, Daddy, just let me give her one more.â
âSorry baby, but itâs your turn now,â Yolanda says, not sounding sorry at all. âIf Trinity wants another one she can give it to herself.â She begins to move again, keeping Baran clutched to her chest, one hand moving against her clit. Baran moans in frustration, hands reaching out futilely for Trinity for just a moment longer before giving over to the sensation of Yolanda in and on her. The new position has the head of Yolandaâs strap hitting just right inside of her, and Baran finds herself reaching around behind her to grab at Yolanda in a desperate attempt to steady herself.
Baran might give in to her new circumstances, but she doesnât give up, instead doing her best to talk her girlfriend to orgasm if she canât touch her. An almost unintelligible string of âgood girl,â and âthatâs it,â and âkeep going,â falling from her lips until finally, finally, a perfectly timed âcome for me,â sends Trinity careening over the edge. Baran laughs breathily, and Yolanda sucks a hickey into her neck, and then Baran falls apart, too.
A moment later Yolanda pulls out, and Baran collapses down onto the bed next to Trinity, rolling over to place a kiss on her hip before turning to look at Yolanda above them. Even as the aftershocks of her orgasm still ripple through her, Baran feels a wave of new desire as she looks at her. Her girlfriend has sweat dripping down her neck in a few places, the curls at her hairline frizzing slightly with the added moisture. Her eyes are almost all pupil, and her lower lip is between her teeth as she as one hand subconsciously rests loosely around the base of her strap. Baran thinks it might be the best sheâs ever seen her look. Trinity reaches up lazily, not sitting up enough to actually reach Yolanda, but enough to easily grab her arm when she does get close enough on her way down to the bed.
A fair bit of shuffling and giggles later, and the three lay side by side, Yolanda in the middle, arms wrapped around her girls. âI should have known you wouldnât totally listen,â Yolanda says, pulling away from the kiss Baran wrapped her up in.
âSorry,â Baran says, kissing down her neck, tongue darting out to taste the sweat drying on her skin.
âIâm not,â Trinity adds from where her head is resting on Yolandaâs chest, fingers tracing random patterns across the flat expanse of Yolandaâs stomach. Her comment pulls a full-bodied laugh from both of her companions.
âYes well,â Yolanda says when sheâs caught her breath. âYouâve had two orgasms. Iâve had none.â
âSorry,â Baran says again, biting gently at Yolandaâs earlobe, eliciting a gasp from the younger woman. âWeâll make it up to you, Daddy.â She looks down Yolandaâs more rapidly rising and falling chest to where Trinity has picked up her head in interest.
âYeah, Daddy,â Trinity says, moving up to kiss Yolanda deeply for a moment. âLet us take care of you.â
âI donâtââ Yolanda tries to start, but is quieted by Trinity kissing her again. Baran only lets it go on for a minute before she snakes her hand into Trinityâs hair, pulling her up to kiss her instead. âWait, what about me?â Yolanda asks frustratedly.
âSorry,â Baran repeats yet again, giggling slightly this time as she pulls off of Trinityâs mouth. One look at the wicked glint in Trinityâs eyes and she knows theyâre on the same page. They move in tandem, Trinity settling between Yolandaâs legs, hooking her fingers around the straps of the harness as Baran settles back on her knees, one hand coming to rest on Yolandaâs truly soaked center. âAll this for us, Daddy?â She teases.
âIf you two donât touch me right now, weâre never doing this again,â Yolanda groans.
âYes, Daddy,â Trinity says with a mock salute, which makes Baran laugh and Yolanda rolls her hips in frustration. They take pity on her then, Baran sliding her thumb under the base of the strap to rest on Yolandaâs clit while she slips two fingers inside. At the same time, Trinity opens her mouth wide and sinks down onto Yolandaâs strap. The motion pushes it down onto Baranâs thumb, which pushes against Yolandaâs clit, and the sound that comes out of Yolandaâs mouth is downright sinful. Baran lets Trinity set the pace after that, timing her thrusts into Yolanda with the bobs and twists of the youngest womanâs mouth and hand on the strap.
From her position on her knees near Yolandaâs hip, Baran has a perfect view of it all. The way Trinity loses herself in the task at hand, the way Yolandaâs hands grip the sheets beneath her as she fights the urge to grab Trinityâs head. Baran grabs Yolandaâs nearest hand in her own unoccupied one, steadying her as she falls apart around her fingers.
When Yolandaâs abdomen has stopped jumping with aftershocks, Trinity moves back up to her previous position in Yolandaâs arms, trailing lazy kisses along her collarbone before collapsing entirely. Baran lets herself stay back where she is for a moment longer, looking at her partners, letting the love and admiration she has for them wash over her in place of the desire that had been present a few minutes before. With striking clarity, she knows she would do anything to keep them.
The thought doesnât scare her as much as it once might have.
Later, once theyâve showered, and hydrated, and eaten. When theyâre all curled up on her oversized couch, maybe reading, maybe napping, maybe doing nothing at all, Baran will allow herself to ask the question. Will let them start making plans, schedule a meeting with HR, talk about how best to tell or not tell their coworkers. For now, though, she is content to stay here, looking at them.
some fluffy snippets of the lives of trinity santos, yolanda garcia, baran al-hashimi, and their two kids.
there are a few more little snippets i have of them but i am impatient and lazy đââď¸. plus iâve seen a bunch of funny tiktoks that i think these five would embody and i donât wanna gatekeep the thoughts any longer
the polycule 𼰠@blueeyesshyskies @black-plant-leg @saintfingers
egging on
"do you see this egg?" jahan asks, holding out his hand. in it is a hollowed out eggshell, still completely intact.
alma nods, eyes wide and full of wonder. she reaches out to grab it but jahan yanks his hand away. "wait, look." jahan crushes the eggshell with ease, displaying the remnants to his little sister.
"how did you do that?" she questions, grabbing his hand and peering into it.
jahan adjusts the angle of his phone camera and pulls his hand away. "itâs a fake egg," he says, setting down the eggshells on the table and grabbing another. "here, take this."
he hands the egg over to alma. "okay!" she agrees, taking it into both of her little hands. "what do i do?"
"we are gonna prank maman." he smiles, nodding towards the kitchen where baran is making dinner. "youâre going to go into the kitchen, tell her itâs a real egg, then throw it on the ground."
"okay!"
he stifles a laugh as he follows alma to the kitchen. sheâs so gullible, no matter how many times he tricks her she keeps falling for it and believing him. itâs cute but also the perfect fuel for an older brother.
she looks back briefly, smiling widely as jahan gives her an encouraging thumbs up. he hides around the corner, phone and head being the only thing sticking out.
"maman, look!" alma says, holding the egg out in front of her like a prize.
baran turns from where she is chopping something, setting down the knife and kneeling. "and what is that, golam?"
"an egg." she looks as smug as any six year old can, eyes gleaming mischievously. "watch what i can do!"
"and what woâ" baran is cut off by the sound of an egg hitting the ground. not a hollowed out eggshell, a full, real egg. it splatters everywhere, some yolk getting on baranâs slippers, eggshells mixed in.
baran blinks in shock, staring at the mess on the floor. laughter erupts out of jahan, stepping into the doorway and doubling over. he makes sure to keep his phone trained on alma, capturing the look of betrayal on her face.
she looks between jahan and baran, tears welling in her eyes. they quickly spill over and alma is wailing, pointing at jahan to accuse him. "jahan- jahan lied," she cries, whole body shaking. "he said itâs fake." sheâs blubbering, snot pouring out of her nose already.
baran looks at jahan, furrowing her brows and pressing her lips into a thin line. he is so fucked, but the video is definitely worth it. he ends the recording and runs out of the room, passing yolanda on the way.
"itâs okay, golam, itâs okay," baran soothes, scooping alma into her arms. "itâs just an egg, right? we can clean it up." she strokes her hair, listening to alma sob about jahan.
yolanda quirks an eyebrow at the sight before her, leaning on the doorframe. baran just shakes her head at her while pressing a kiss into almaâs temple.
â
please be quiet, please
"mama farted!" alma yells, pointing at yolanda.
yolanda halts, grocery cart wheels squeaking with the sudden stop. her eyes fly open and she stares at alma, mouth agape. she had not.
"you farted, mama," alma continues, laughing her head off. "fart, fart, fart, you farted!"
yolanda leans down, holding onto her outstretched hand. "shhh, please be quiet honey," she whispers, trying to ignore the people around them staring. "weâre in a store so you need to use your inside voice."
laughing, alma shakes her head. "faaaaaaaart," she sings, wrestling out of yolandaâs grip. alma runs around the cart and her mama, continuing on about her farting.
yolanda hangs her head in shame, hiding her face in her hands. she can hear adult laughter around her and wants to disappear. almaâs tiny hands grab her arm and shakes it.
"mama, mama, you did a fart. you did a fart!" she says, a new wave of giggles taking over her.
yolanda groans and picks her up, putting her into the seat of the cart. "okay honey, letâs keep shopping."
alma keeps giggling, repeating the word fart over and over until they get into the car with yolanda sporting a beet-red face.
â
AHHHHH
trinity knows she fucked up at 8:21 at night when trying to give alma her bath.
trying being the keyword because every time trinity tries to bring alma into the bathroom, she screams and cries.
maybe, just maybe, showing a five year old jaws was a bad idea.
trinity thought it was a classic, the very basics of horror to the point it barely even counts. it was just a shark attacking people at the beach, and they rarely go to the beach. it should have been fine, it should be fine.
she may have forgotten the water aspect applies to a lot more things. like the bath that she takes every night.
the shark toy in the bath definitely did not help.
"alma, bunso, itâs okay. itâs just a toy, itâs just sharky," she tries, holding up the toy and moving it around playfully.
alma cries harder and buries her face in baranâs leg. baran shakes her head and looks down at trinityâs pleading eyes. she picks her up and alma quickly wraps herself around her maman who bounces her gently, whisper words of comfort into her ear.
"how about this? how about i get in the bath with you?" trinity offers. "no shark will get you if iâm there, right?"
alma calms a little and nods. "okay," she squeaks out.
trinity takes a bath with alma every night for thirteen weeks, only slightly regretting her decision.
â
heâsâŚ. straight?
jahan takes a deep breath, rocking back and forth on his feet. his nerves were obvious, emanating off of him in waves.
the nerves spread through his mothers, all equally worried about what he wants to tell them. baran already has a sneaking suspicion, having caught him smiling like a child at his phone. trinity and yolanda on the other hand, assume the worst. crashed the car, failed a class, got in a fight, something wildly out of character for him.
"um, i was wonderingâŚ" he trails off, eyes darting between the three. "can i bring a girl home?"
a warm smile spreads across baranâs face then yolandaâs quickly after, a mix of pride and happiness washing over them. trinity however, tilts her head.
"yeah? why would you not be able to?" trinity asks, raising an eyebrow. the confusion is clear in her voice. heâs had girls over before, half of his friends are girls.
yolanda snickers before baran elbows her in the side. "stop it," she whispers harshly. baran is glaring at her wife who is now holding her hand over her mouth to hold back her laughter.
jahan shakes his head, looking down to the floor. "no, she isâ imani is my girlfriend. we want to watch a movie and we have a nice tv."
furrowing her brows, trinity leans forward. "thatâs fine, youâve had girl friends over before. iâm confused."
"nanay," he whines, staring at her with pleading eyes. trinity is usually so sharp, picking up on the subtlest of hints to piece things together. now though, she was missing ever clue even though they barely counted as such. it was spelled out plainly before her and she was reading it with both eyes shut.
"what?" trinity asks, drawing out the word. "itâs true! iâve never met imani before but iâm sure sheâs wonderful."
jahan looks desperately between yolanda and baran, begging them for help. yolanda shakes her head, still stifling laughter, and baran sighs. she scoots closer to trinity and leans into her ear.
"my love," she begins, grasping one of trinityâs hands gently. "what jahan is trying to say is, he wants to bring a girl over for a date." when trinity says nothing, eyes just widening as she blinks slowly, baran continues. "imani is his not his friend who happens to be a girl, she is his girlfriend. theyâre a couple."
yolanda has given up on holding back her laughter, letting the sound fill the room as she gives jahan a thumbs up.
trinity doesnât move, staring straight ahead. jahan has a girlfriend. jahan likes girls. maybe heâs bi, or pan, or omni, or fluid, or, oh god she doesnât even want to think it. he could be straight.
"jahan," trinity says slowly. she still hasnât moved, but her grip on baranâs hand has tightened.
"yes, nanay?" his voice shakes, clearly surprised by whatever sort of reaction this was from trinity.
"i need you to know i will love you no matter what, okay?" jahan nods and trinity continues, "are you straight?"
jahan swallows, nodding as he meekly says, "yes."
trinity inhales deeply, ignoring yolandaâs continued laughter and the beginnings of baranâs, holds for four, and exhales. "okay," she squeaks out. "thatâs fine. i justâ"
she stops, letting go of baranâs hand and standing. "three polyamorous queer moms. three," she whispers, beginning to pace. "where did we go wrong? was it the star wars? yola, was this because of you?" she asks, running her hands through her hair.
yolanda quells her giggles to stand and cup her wifeâs face. "baby, cariĂąo, calm down." her amusement at this scenario clear. "as long as heâs safe and happy, thatâs all that matters. right?"
nodding, trinity sighs. "i know, i know. but, straight? really?" she asks, sending yolanda back into her fit of laughter and giving baran the final push into hers.
season 3 opens. baran al-hashimi is in a coma from the car crash she was in on her way home after season 2. victoria javadi comes down alongside caleb jefferson for a psych consult. he asks her three question and she answers all of them wrong. trinity santos suspects all her patients are abuse victims and is proven wrong every single time. mel and trinity communicate perfectly without a single misunderstanding. dennis whitaker is a senior resident for some reason. perlah and princess, it's explained in one line by james ogilvie who's the new ed intern, both quit. jack abbot is in every single episode because they needed a second attending for the shift after baran fell into that pesky coma. in the last episode he changes into his streetwear. he's wearing a blue lives matter shirt. frank langdon accidentally shuts down pittsburgh's electrical grid because he was trying to turn down the lights for an autistic patient. cassie mckay's every line starts with, "my son." parker ellis spends the whole season looking directly into the camera and explaining what characters really meant when they said that thing and don't worry, they all love each other.
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here is one little line of garsanshimi smut from a scene iâm working on
bc honestly i need the notes to motivate me to keep going
Baran nods, and the grip on her jaw turns firm as Yolanda raises an eyebrow. Heat surges through Baranâs body, her limbs and head feeling almost weightless as everything concentrates in her center. âYes,â she sighs out, nodding again. Itâs not enough of an answer for Yolanda, who tightens her grip further still and rests her thumb on Baranâs bottom lip. She knows what the surgeon is waiting for, knows sheâs on the precipice of giving in fully. She takes in a shaky breath and lets it happen. âYes, Daddy,â she exhales.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
â Live Streamingâ Interactive Chatâ Private Showsâ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
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Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
â Live Streamingâ Interactive Chatâ Private Showsâ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
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and if i say trinity santos who for the first time truly loves her sex life. she has 2 partners who respect her and listen to her and want her to feel good no matter how difficult she feels like sheâs being
but it wasnât always like that, or well she didnât realise it wasnt always supposed to be like that
early on when sometimes she just doesnât want to be touched. or she does. but she doesnât want sex. doesnât even want wandering hands, just wants the steady pressure of closeness.
and she feels guilty because she can feel baranâs mouth kissing down her neck, yolandaâs hands squeezing at her waist. and she knows she should put a stop to it, because this right now feels nice, but she doesnât want any more than this.
but she feels guilty, because she has two beautiful women fawning over her and she feels like she wants to crawl out of her skin. so she tries to withstand it, for as long as she can, goes as soft and pliant as she manage. until she canât do it anymore, pushes at them to get them away. says quietly, ashamed, iâm sorry, i donâtâŚiâm not feeling it, but you two can, i can just go hang out in the lounge
and she was expecting disappointment, maybe a bit of annoyance or irritation. after all sheâd basically led them onâŚ.
okay, do you want to cuddle instead or do you want to actually be alone? baran asks, eyes a little sad in the way that trinity eventually realises means that sheâs said or done something that exposes how warped her view of reality can be sometimes
what? because this doesnât make sense. yes she wants to be cuddled, even wants the way yolanda was gripping her waist gently to continue. that was wonderful until her brain caught up and realised what they thought the end goal should be. i donât want to have sex right now.
we heard you trin, and weâre telling you thatâs okay. weâre asking what you wanna do now, yolanda this time, a crinkle in her brow as she tries to puzzle trinityâs reaction out. and then devastatingly, itâs only fun if weâre all on the same wavelength
that punches the air out of her lungs in a way she doesnât want to acknowledge. because sheâs not stupid, really, she knows what consent is for fucks sake. she just isnât sure how to react to them taking it so well
goes out on a limb, meekly, can we cuddle? the closeness was nice, just notâŚanything more
baranâs shuffling towards her, letting trinity tentatively drag her to lay down properly so she can tuck her head into the crook of the attendingâs neck. when sheâs suitably comfy, waving an arm a little blindly towards yolanda until she shuffles up to cocoon her on the other side
iâm sorry for ruining the mood, she says quietly, half hoping neither of them hear it. can feel the way yolandaâs grip tenses just a fraction, baranâs chin knocking against her head as she shakes her own in denial.
telling us what you want isnât ruining anything, how youâre feeling is important, youâre important to us, baran tells her, a little stern, and trinity knows theyâll be revisiting this at a later date for sure
but at least right now she can feel the kiss yolanda presses to the back of her neck as she murmurs her agreement with baran against her skin. one of baranâs hands alternating playing with her hair hair and yolandaâs gently.
sheâs not much good yet at the whole open communication thing that baran seems so insistent upon, but sheâs trying and one day sheâll get there