āNice guy!ā said I, āTotal dildoānice guy still if nerd or dudebro,
Whether reddit sent, or whether romcoms tossed thee here ashore,
Barely known yet still entitled, holding now your Tom Waits vinyl,
Begging me for something primal, tell me truly, I implore
Is thisāis this shit for fucking real? Tell me, tell me, I implore!
Quoth the friendzoned, āFucking whore.ā
āNice guy!ā said I, āTotal dildoānice guy still if nerd or dudebro,
By the mores that you abuse thus, by those films we both adore,
Tell this soul with sorrow laden if, by stalking me through Facebook,
You have gained a twisted outlook of whom those tropes are for,
Paint a rare and radiant dream girl whilst you remain a bore,
Quoth the friendzoned, āFucking whore.ā
āBe that slur our sign of parting, creep or douche!ā I shrieked, upstarting,
āGet thee back to lonely anguish and your friendās used comic store!
Leave no white rose as a token of the lust you claim heartbroken,
Leave my scathing words to soak in! Quit the name calling of āwhoreā,
When you lust for every girl, but when they say nay they are whores!
Quoth the friendzoned, āFucking whore.ā
And the friendzoned, never scoring, still imploring, still imploring,
On some fetid old subreddit for a girl who will adore
The nicer guys and not the ādouchebagsā, unaware that itās a red flag
To be his soulmate o'er him learning they both like the movie Thor
To fuck him for being nerdy even though he is a bore,
Then she says noāfucking whore.
blakekathryn
stormborns
pixelskylines
origamiaround
