So Spake the Lord Secretary

or Games, unlimited games, but no games.

゛ꨄ︎﹒Wh... Are you okay, mew? ⸝⸝․ᐟ

and i need to show you all some of these because ?????

No! NO! NO!!! Stop feeding my body a buncha crap!! You're probably gonna kill her!! Or... Blow her up or something...

I love eating gunpowder, mew!~

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• first of all the “MY JARONA!” adlib. THAT is what made ‘my jarona’ a vocal stim for me! not flowers version!

•I JUST HEARD THE FREEDOM MOTIF AT THE START LMFAO and the lil “eeuuughhh..” wait now that i heard the freedom motif i can’t unhear it WHAT

• the jersey beat. oh my god this song starts off SO strong. i love it

• whenever a word has the ‘ew’ sound in it, “you, miku,” you can hear the pink mew (???) saying “mew”

• the bg harmonies. please listen and appreciate the harmonies

•speaking of, on the last “she is saving the day, susie kris and ralsei” in the chorus, there’s this harmony that you can faintly hear in the version from the game that chai just makes sm louder and it sounds so YUMMY OHMY GODDDD

• the different voices for the different sides of mew, i really like this detail very very cute

• the sheer amount of lil jon’s “WHAT?!?!” “HEY!!!!”s and how that also continues somehow into “IS THAT HATSUNE MIKU?!?!” (cracks me up everytime HOW did you get it to sound like lil jon was asking that i’m in tears)

• hm: yo ho ho, it’s me, weird deird gaster, sailor of the seven seas! ye vessel weren’t discarded, merely repurposed!!!!!!

• the way chai screams “BOOM!” at 1:53 and also the “FRIEND INSIDE ME!!!” at 2:20 but also specifically how panicked it sounds, makes me laugh no matter what i’m doing while listening

•”cue motif, cue that tune to save you!” but in the background when they sing “you” there’s a “mew!” (i mentioned this before but i just appreciate this one ❤️)

•the sheer passion and joy in “SHE IS TOTALLY GAY!!!” in pink mew’s voice, i love that she loves herself #WELOVEYOUPINK

• the last line being “read homestuck.” that’s how you know this is real quality. i mean come on guys

• the concept of “mad dummy motif from undertale” as a lyric and the reality of it flowing so freaking perfectly . i actually died laughing when i first listened and realised what my ears just heard

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okay upon further review my favorite bit is all of it. it’s an immediate mood booster i just wanna laugh while listening cause when you’re listening, cause, like..

like, at first listen it just sounds like a parody song right. but then you sctually Listen to the little things and it becomes clear that actual effort and thought was put into this, which makes it both the funniest thing ever and also really impressive

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tl;dr

chai.t’s “cutie pew pew magic” deserves at least one listen. it’s so funny and is really well made it’s not your typical “spamton g spamton is my name” if you get me (im not shitting on that, cause i’ve never actually heard more than 3 seconds #IMSORRY)

Even though (or perhaps because) she's probably felt more at peace than she's had in a long time, Lightner Pink's frustration from her life in the Light World clearly colors some of her dialogue. This contrasts wonderfully with the more open whimsy that Mew Mew, clearly retaining her optimism in her edgy second season, has. "Tell me, was everything always this beautiful?" and "Here, the sunset shines from the back of your eyes, like the afterglow of a light you stared at too long" are both wonderful in their own way at describing the gorgeous animation of the shop screen itself.

I also adore the ambiguity in their text of whether it's the Ghost or the Body speaking. There's no real reason for someone to assume that Maddie was possessing the Mew Mew figure when Kris made the Fountain if they hadn't picked up on the foreshadowing, but this makes talking to her again a real treat to wonder what would be color coded. After all, the colors of her shop's interior are pretty minimal. You wouldn't have any real way to tell if anything's Pink in there, right?

The way she says "That's right, go outside. It's beautiful." when you leave... It makes me think a lot about how lonely Maddie must be, only really having Mettaton and Napstablook for company when she's at home and clearly having her dysphoria eat at her. I think there's a double meaning here. I thought this line was meant to be read bitterly at first, but with hindsight it's clear that she's being entirely sincere. This fantasy world where she gets to be the anime catgirl of her dreams would be pretty beautiful, huh? ...but no, I think this is Maddie's bitterness seeping through. Like Maddie couldn't help but think about how much her life sucks and take an opportunity to tell the Fun Gang to enjoy what little fun they'll have left.

Also, I think there's something to be said about whatever crush Maddie may or may not have on Asgore, somewhat teased in Chapter 2 by her getting flustered at the idea of Kris telling him hi on her behalf and in Chapter 5 where she can't help but call him a hunk even mid-seethe. This is clearly compounded with both her and Darkner Pink obviously feeling REALLY bad for him in the sorry state he's in, which is a little funny considering both Maddie's possessiveness over the figure and her no doubt having trespassed in Flower King after hours to do so.

There's still a lot of fun to be had from her here, of course. There's how she just makes enough use of her repeating something thrice, thrice, thrice verbal tic to give someone who'd vaguely remember Mad Dummy and Mad Mew Mew from Undertale just enough foreshadowing about her true identity, ragging on the Fun Gang for their ears which is really fucking funny actually, mocking Kris for being broke if you don't have enough money to pay for her wares, the way the Darkner half plays coy about her name only for the Lightner half to get frustrated with you trying to spoil the dramatic flair when you try to ask again, the way she fails her spot check by putting the key to the Flowers' secret room on sale without realizing somehow?

Oh, and the music oughhhh... Shop 3 might be one of my favorite tracks from Chapter 5. I'd say it's just as good as Flower Man, Sunset of 7 Suns, Petal Dance, and Mew Mew Cutie Magic, honestly. I look forward to hearing it again in Chapter 6, but it works miracles here. Sonically, it reminds me a lot of Dialtone, but rather than its sparse, melancholy instrumentation trying and failing to help Spamton to trick you into thinking he still has a chance if only you'd help him, Shop 3 invites you to watch the sunset with Pink. I think of the empty spot on the counter not just as the spot she'd save for Orange after you get the Shadow Crystal, but also as an invitation for you, the player to immerse yourself in this quiet little place and feel like you're sitting next to her, someone who found herself the first taste of freedom in a long time but is stuck pondering everything about herself. That's what makes this place stick out so much to me. Even with its own simplicity, it's much lusher than Dialtone... because it's hopeful, and willing to put in a little extra effort to get you to level with her, rather than just pull pity and distress out of you.

I know everybody's got a lot of thoughts running about the Darkner half's knowledge of FRIEND and her insane boss fight (very understandably so), but I am just so taken by how rich this little shop REALLY is at adding to Chapter 5's bittersweet atmosphere. Especially when Orange decides to stay with her as much as she can until the final battle, the two just enjoying their time together...

Treasure this world, won't you?

And uh... about Chapter 5's ending... Maddie was definitely still possessing the figure while the Dark Fountain was sealed, right? Which means she definitely heard Susie reading off Asgore's piece of the Shelter code and may have bore witness to Kris trying to rip it apart? I'm just saying, there's a lot of potential for Chapter 6's Castle Town drama here.