red bull at 3 am

men and women are not opposites. men and women are not enemies. men and women are two parts of a broad coalition which fights against a mutual enemy: inkjet printers

good morning everyone it's time to be tortured to insanity and then of course tortured for being insane

Bearded vultures will see an iron oxide rich mud puddle and go 'is anyone going to bathe in that' and not wait for an answer

date a forest god who whispers to you endlessly, quietly, until you finally heed his call

*puts my cigarettes out on you*

*wuickly smokes it all before you can reach me*

oh a wise guy huh? *rolls up my sleeves* why I oughta…

*wuickly rolls your sleeves back down before you can hit me*

when life gives you lemons you squeeze them into your open wounds

it must feel good as fuck to walk on the surface tension of water as a bug

I’m sorry my lovelies but the reason you hate yourself is because you treat you like shit. If you came up to me and then told me I was a fuck up who could never do anything right I'd fucking hate you too.

if you didn't let me go to bed until after midnight because you'd rather watch Netflix than let me rest, and then got mad at me for not being productive the next day I'd be PISSED

[Image ID: Tumblr tags reading: trying so hard to correct this, catching myself and scoling myself for not being kind to myself, what kinda circular logic is happening in my brain, anyway. this i /End ID]