Loooney Lisa's freakin life!

Pastor: Now, according to a few passages in the bible, homosexuality is a sin.

Couple of older males in the audience: Amen!

Pastor: Now, wait, I'm not finished.

Pastor: You know what else the bible defines as a sin? Divorce.

-uncomfortable silence-

Pastor: There are countless passages that talk about how divorce is wrong, and that there are consequences to getting a divorce, such as the wife should be stoned.

Pastor: Yet, I witnessed a divorce just this morning. And I gotta tell you, it was heartbreaking, but I definitely didn't attempt to throw rocks at the wife, even though she was the one who filed for divorce.

Pastor: We choose to overlook the consequences of divorce because time has proven that they're inhumane and cruel.

Pastor: The bible doesn't say anything about the consequences of a homosexual lifestyle. Yet, we seem to be spearheading a campaign to ruin the lives of people we don't even know.

-the pastor shifts a few notes around-

Pastor: The bible states to love thy neighbor. That's it. There are no other rules or restrictions to that passage.