loel

i love how he is realistically messy and confused and hypocritcial and drunk

i love how he had what would have been the worst day of his life 6 times in one year

i love how his hyperspecific circumstance has him so mixed up as to right and wrong, to the extent that he views accepting privilige as the responsible riteous path and rejecting it as selfsish

i love how you can tell when the words he is speaking are not his own, when he is repeating "privilige not punishment" and "people will take advantage" and "keep private things private"

Ive said before that he would really enjoy writing shitty poetry that progressses into not so-shitty half decent poetry

and he'd enjoy buying hand made felted hats with frogs and different fruits on them

how he'd present more femininly and get a tattoo so he can feel in control of his body

#myfailprince

For the full experience play all of me wants all of you by Sufjan Stevens.

Well I defrost like a flower in spring to bring you my second art of hannigram, thoughts ?

It sounded so romantic and beautiful so I researched it. And of course, found this…

And this.

And this.

Let’s go over the scene.

Look at the LOVE on his face.

Hannibal looks quite displeased. 

BA DUM TSS! Will knows Hannibal loves word-play… Will has the mind for it, as well.

I remember the conversation they had in season 1, before Will knew Hannibal was a murderer…

HANNIBAL: Words are living things. They have personality, point of view, agenda.

WILL: They’re pack hunters. 

Look at Will, now. Using them to do exactly that – though, he does specify a few times that he’s not HUNTING, he’s FISHING. 

Hannibal thinks he finally helped Will to become the God he was meant to be. The God that, together, they would be. Two halves of the same whole. He is thrilled - this is what he’s wanted since EPISODE ONE. 

At this point, Will hesitates. He swallows. He SIGHS. And then he lies. Look at his face. He’s not happy about it. He just thinks it’s the right thing to do, the thing he’s supposed to do. But he’s going against what they promised one another at the start of the resuming of the therapy - that they wouldn’t lie to one another. Hannibal has held true to his word, but this is when Will has not. And he actually exhibits REGRET when doing it. 

I LOVE this part, because, if you watch. Will picks up the glass. He pretends he’s about to take a sip. But he doesn’t… and he says how he can’t be reduced to a set of influences. JUST as Hannibal takes a sip of the wine. 

Will picked up the wine - Hannibal picked up the wine. Will influenced Hannibal into taking a sip, yet he did not sip it himself - this shows us that Hannibal is the one being influenced by Will, that they are not equals at this moment. And Will is aware of it. He lifted the glass to test Hannibal; “will you mirror me?” 

“An unconscious sign of attraction is mirroring, or matching another person’s movements. When people are interested in one another, researchers have found that they tend to mimic each other’s movements and gestures.”

This also mirrors, and accentuates, what Bedelia said about Hannibal in Season 1; that Hannibal is a “social antisocial,” meaning that he is virtually incapable of being influenced by others - until having met Will Graham. 

And this leads into the finale’s, “Did you think you could change me? The way I changed you?” “I already did.” 

(He’s allowed to sip now because he’s made his point.) 

Behavior is not good or bad – it just is, and it occurs in accordance with certain fairly well understood principles.

(He actually said “meal” - the subtitles were incorrect.)

Half of Hannibal’s face is in dark. Half of Will’s face is in dark. Both of the dark halves of their faces are filled, illuminated, with the lighter half of the other’s. This is visual poetry. 

The thing is, they don’t know each other. 

By the time they interact in any part II post canon fic, it’s their first real interaction after deciding to change. Granted, Abby had already begun changing earlier (she’s the one who refused to initiate a fight after the Rattlers and let Ellie and Dina live at the theatre), but by the time they stop fighting in the Pacific ocean, Ellie has now also chosen to change (give up revenge, which has given her nothing in return so far and doesn't make her feel better. Abby already knows that, because she killed Joel a while ago and has already realized revenge doesn't help).

So now, they’re effectively new people, trying on new skins and personalities while standing beside someone who has seen them at their absolute lowest (Abby torturing and killing Joel is Ellie and Abby's first interaction. And then in Seattle, Ellie picks off all of Abby's friends but that's the first time Abby really sees who Ellie is as a person.)

The level of vulnerability here is insane : fear of judgment, fear of being seen as fake, fear that the new versions of themselves might still be awful and that the other might call them out on their bullshit or worse, expose them. They’re both projecting who they want to be now onto Lev because he’s the only unbiased person left. He’s a child, but he also doesn’t know their complicated past. He's also someone Abby already connected with (she's been with him for over a year now and they likely have developed a strong friendship, meanwhile Ellie raised JJ who I'm pretty sure is a huge reason why Ellie didn't fully spiral upon returning: he gave her something to do and look out for).

And so Ellie and Abby perceive each other through two conflicting lenses simultaneously: the monster the other knows me to be vs. the person I’m trying to become now.

And that’s why Ellabs is such an interesting ship to explore.

It’s about the reinvention of self and the deconstruction of old beliefs in the presence of someone deeply traumatized by those very beliefs.

We know Abby and Ellie’s character archetypes. We’ve seen gruff Joel slowly break through Ellie’s walls (and vice versa), so we’re subconsciously aware that, under different circumstances, Ellie and Abby would likely get along, since Abby is also a version of Joel (as we have seen through basically 95% of Abby's actions, Joel's murder notwithstanding).

We know this shift is possible because we've literally just seen it happen: Abby abandoned her loyalty to the WLF to help the Seraphite kids, despite owing Isaac everything (Isaac gave her a team and resources to go achieve her unique goal of murdering a guy, which was all Abby cared about). We also know Ellie is now utterly alone (Dina broke up with her, there's not returning to the farm to find a happy family. Dina tells her she's not doing this again, which is actually funny because it's also what Abby says at the beach. Ellie's quest for revenge lasts longer than everyone else's in the game. She is the LAST one to change), desperate for either death or something new to care about. She’d never bend for Abby, but Lev--an innocent kid who showed her mercy (stopping Abby from killing her and Dina in the theater)--could make her stick around. He’s untainted. She also feels gratitude; without Lev, she and Dina would be dead.

This also means Ellie realizes Abby has changed. The woman who brutalized Joel with a golf club (yet spared her and Tommy) is now restrained by Lev’s influence (re: theatre scene, where he stops her from killing Dina by calling out her name). Ellie knows Abby is not as ruthless as the act of killing Joel made her seem: Lev’s stayed with her for over a year, and Abby clearly cares for him deeply. This likely also sends Ellie back to her failure as a "mom". Abby stuck with Lev, who's a kid and therefore a "burden", when Ellie hurt Dina when she confessed in the theatre, AND THEN LEFT THEM. I think unconsciously this is a big blow to Ellie who can't help be see the ways Abby did "better" than her.

Also, Abby knows Ellie isn’t a heartless monster. Yes, Ellie murdered all of her friends, but she also confessed and basically sacrificed herself to save Tommy, which is proof she operates by a code. Militia logic dictates that codes matter. Yet Ellie’s violence also shows she’ll slaughter those outside her tribe without hesitation (Abby and surrounding people are not her tribe by that point).

Abby also witnesses what she thinks is Ellie’s mercy when Ellie cuts her down to save Lev. That's why she says "there are boats". She’s offering an olive branch after (mis)realizing Ellie extended one first.

Then again, I don’t think Ellie waited for Abby to set Lev on the boat to act. She followed because she had no idea what to do next. She traveled for months to avenge Joel, only to confront the reality that Abby isn’t the immoral monster she imagined--just a human who suffers like everyone else. Seeing her so emaciated is catapulting Abby out of monster realm and into human one in Ellie’s mind.

And Ellie, as we know, is not a psychopath; her violence isn’t for fun. She’s shaken by Abby’s state and only realizes last-minute (she turns her back on Abby, she looks pensive, she could let Abby go) that sparing her means all of this was for nothing--the one thing Ellie can’t accept. She desperately wants all of this to have been for something. Joel butchered dozens of people to save her. Then Abby tracked and killed him. Then Ellie killed Abby's friends and had to confront her own violence, then her own selfishness by going after Abby instead of staying with her family. If she lets Abby go, then this will have been for nothing.

And now they are stuck together, having gone through all these changes and completely unmoored by the other's action, and then saved by them.

That’s why forced post-canon proximity is so compelling: you take two people bound by hatred and explore how long it takes for their biases to crumble. It's about showing a person who knows you a certain way you aren't that way anymore. They could do this with anyone else, but it would be less interesting, because one of the major appeal of the ship is the forgiveness aspect. Both of each other and of themselves. They cannot do that part without the other.

That’s the interesting part. Finding meaning after losing everything.