Which one sounds more interesting? 🦎
Yakob (Immortal Man) x Amogus Guy
Seductive Woman x Cashier Girl
Alkonost and Sirin (The Sisters)
**I will make all of them eventually!! 🦎**
Mike Driver
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Which one sounds more interesting? 🦎
Yakob (Immortal Man) x Amogus Guy
Seductive Woman x Cashier Girl
Alkonost and Sirin (The Sisters)
**I will make all of them eventually!! 🦎**

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Which one sounds more interesting? 🦎
Cat Lady x Prophet
High Guy x Widow
Fairytale Enjoyer x EnerJeka Addict
**I will make all of them eventually!! 🦎**
Which one sounds more interesting? 🦎
EnerJeka Addict x Amogus Guy
Wireface x Blinded Man
Amogus Guy x Sleepless Man
**I will make all of them eventually!! 🦎**
Which one sounds more interesting? 🦎
The Vigilante x The Fortune Teller
High Guy x EnerJeka Addict
Coat Guy x Cashier Girl
**I will make all of them eventually!! 🦎**
Which one sounds more interesting? 🦎
Blinded Man x Factory Worker
Bar Guy x Coat Guy
Seductive Woman x Widow
**I will make all of them eventually!! 🦎**

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Which one sounds more interesting? 🦎
Failed Musician x EnerJeka Addict
Failed Musician x Coat Guy
High guy x Factory Worker
**I will make all of them eventually!! 🦎**
I'm back!! I know I never stated I was gone or going on hiatus. I apologize for that, I was going through a rough time. I plan to get back to writing for No I'm not a Human now!! 🦎
Kitty is here... What more you need?
The Cat Lady and Pudding
The cat lady sat on the floor with Pudding curled up in her arms like a baby purring softly against her chest. The warmth radiated off of Pudding's little body, warming the cat lady's skin beneath her thin tank top.
She ran her fingers through Pudding's soft, warm fur humming, quietly as she did. The rhythmic purring was a comfort, one she didn't always get to have reminding her that she needed to appreciate days like these. Especially when the cat was growing older and becoming slower and heavier in her arms... But even with her aging, she knew Pudding would always remain her sweet baby.
Lazy days with her favorite furry companion were the best thing she could ever ask for. Especially since these days meant she could give Pudding all the attention she deserved.
But deep down, she knew it couldn’t last forever. The world was breaking a little more each day, and so was she. Pudding didn’t know that, of course. Pudding only knew the rhythm of her voice, the gentle brush of her fingers, the safe circle of her arms. All she could do was keep holding her close, offering every bit of love she had left and hope that, when the time came, someone kind would be there to hold Pudding the way she did now.
Cheer Up!
The Firefighter X Luka (Cheerful Man)
Purely Fluff 🦎
The Firefighter couldn’t think of a single reason he should keep living. His body may as well have been giving up on him. There wasn’t a single part of him that didn’t ache with every breath he took.
Every time he had to be around Luka, a tinge of annoyance crept up his spine. How could someone be so happy in the world they lived in? Who cared about what happened in the past? Was now really the time to be happy?
The Firefighter didn’t like being around Luka. He feared he might feel obligated to take him on as some kind of passion project make him happy for a while, then leave him like he was nothing more than dust once he found someone new to fix.
So, the minute Luka approached him, he glared.
“I don’t want your pity pep talk,” he said hoarsely, turning away.
Luka could only sigh, shaking his head. “Thinking that I pity you just because of your appearance? Didn’t you know jumping to conclusions makes an ass out of you? I can tell you’re a strong man... Just the simple fact that you aren’t dead by now.”
The Firefighter felt his chest tighten slightly, like he’d just been recognized after all his years of work, but he ignored that feeling and instead turned his head away, quickly rolling his eyes.
“Like you know anything,” he muttered, his tone softening.
Luka gave a dry laugh. “The sooner you stop feeling sorry for yourself, the faster you can live the rest of your life happier,” he said, giving a small smile.
The Firefighter didn’t feel fully convinced, but… he did have to give Luka some credit. He did need to stop feeling sorry for himself... To stop wallowing in his regrets like he had been. The Firefighter didn’t have much life left to live. What use was there in spending his last days depressed?
“And what do you suggest I do to be happier?” the Firefighter asked.
Luka couldn’t help but laugh. “Maybe finally join us in the kitchen for dinner? It tends to get loud… but it’s always a fun time.”
And almost as if on cue, the homeowner called out, yelling that dinner was ready. Luka looked at the Firefighter with an almost hopeful expression as he started toward the kitchen door. His smile widened the moment he glanced back and saw the Firefighter right behind him.
Which one sounds more interesting? 🦎
The Firefighter X Luka (Cheerful Man)
Cat Lady and Pudding
The Gravedigger X The Kindergarten Teacher
**I will make all of them eventually!! 🦎**
**Feel free to make requests of your own! 🙂🦎**

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Pudding Headcanons 🐱
Lazy. Sleeps a lot. She needs her beauty sleep 💖🐱💤
Behaves like she hates everyone and everything... But she 100% has her favorite humans/visitors to be around.
Favorite female humans/visitors: The Cat Lady (Obviously) and The Cashier Girl.
Favorite male humans/visitors: Coat Guy, Esenin (Bar Guy), and Homeowner.
Plops onto the ground in front of people's feet as a way to get their attention.
Specifically, like beef flavored cat food will ignore you for a day if given any other flavor.
Weighs 15 Ibs. Yes, she is a chunky girl, and we love her.
Fluffy fur, that she keeps well maintained.
Medium length coat that has a slight glossy appearance to it.
Sheds. Sheds a lot.
Doesn't like brushes. She sees you holding a brush... You gonna get bit and scratched.
Bathtime!!
Coat Guy X Wireface
Purely Fluff 🦎
Coat guy didn't smell the best. He knew that, but he was always so cold that taking off his jacket and the rest of his clothes to get in the shower seemed like something that would end up killing him. He was too cold to do that.
But Wireface, his new buddy, seemed to have a different opinion. While he hugged him, he noticed that his nose would scrunch up each time from the smell... Coat guy felt bad he really did... But parting with his jacket? No, never.
"Blf hnvoo. Yzgs. Blf mvvw z yzgs. (You smell. Bath. You need a bath.)" Wireface muttered as he looked at his friend, his lip twitching in slight annoyance.
Coat guy only stared back with a confused look, trying to peice together what he could have said. "You know... I-I don't understand you..." Coat guy murmured with a frown.
Wireface was starting to have enough of his friends refusal to bathe or wash his jacket. Wireface grabbed his wrist tight, pulling him towards the bathroom.
"Yzgs... Blfi gzprmt lmv dsvgsvi blf orpv rg li mlg! (Bath... You're taking one whether you like it or not!)" Wireface said as he pulled off his own shirt.
Wireface tossed his shirt on the floor near the tub. Wirefacw leaned over the tub, turning the water on. Testing it with his fingers too hot, too cold he messed with it until he adjusted it to a nice toasty warm temperature that he knew wouldn't burn him, and hopefully wouldn't leave Coat guy shivering even despite the heat he plugged the drain and watched as the water began to rise.
Wireface looked at Coat guy expectantly gesturing for him to get undressed as well, Coat guy stared at him, his face slightly red as he shook his head.
"No! No, no, no!" Coat guy said as he backed away towards the door. The thought of taking his jacket off was an overwhelming one... Would he die from the coldness he felt? Or even worse, would he get colder than he already is? His hand reached behind him, desperately searching for the door knob.
Several painful minutes of struggling later... 🦎
Coat guy sat in the water with a frown glancing at his Wireface who sat across from him. Sure, his friend was there with him... But... He just didn't like water... And he didn't like being without his jacket.
Without that comforting weight on his shoulders he felt exposed. The absence was strange, almost overwhelming.
"Hvv... Gsrh rhm'g hl yzw! (See... This isn't so bad!)" Wireface murmured, his voice gentle and oddly comforting. He reached for the cup, filled it with water, and slowly poured it over his own hair, then reached out to do the same for Coat guy.
Coat guy shuddered frowned as the water ran down his face, his inky black hair sticking flat to his cheeks. Straightened by the water it looked even more like a bob than it did before.
Wireface couldn't help but chuckle softly as he looked at Coat guy. "Hl lww... Yfg... R orpv gszg zylfg blf. (So odd... But... I like that about you.)" Wireface whispered, brushing his hair out of his eyes.
Wireface washed his own hair first before pouring more shampoo into the palm of his hands, moving to massage it into Coat guys hair gently. Whenever he felt he had massaged it in well enough, he took a few minutes to lightly scratch his scalp in a soothing way, smiling at the way the guy visibly relaxed.
When it came time for him to finally rinse his hair, he murmured, "Hsfg... Hsfg blfi vbvh. (Shut... Shut your eyes.)"
Wireface put his hand over his own eyes in a moving down motion, shutting his eyes, hoping Coat guy would understand what he was trying to tell him.
Coat guy took a few moments before he understood what he was being asked, shutting his eyes and letting Wireface rinse the soap out of his hair.
He had to admit... This wasn't too bad, especially with Wireface washing his hair for him. The consistency that he moved his hands with and thag gentle hum that left Wireface. The gentle scratching on his scalp felt like heaven.
He wished he could return the favor and wash his hair, but it would only end up hurting his own hands from the damaged state they were in.
When his hair was all clean and water wiped off his face, he finally opened his eyes to see Wireface looking at him with a proud smile the kind that screamed 'I told you so'.
"Uvog tllw, irtsg? (Felt good, right?)" Wireface questioned. He knew Coat guy couldn't understand him... But he wasn't frowning like he was earlier, so that had to be a good sign.
As the water started to chill, Wireface grabbed a washcloth one for him and one for Coat guy pouring bodywash onto both. Wireface started to wash himself, and Coat guy did as well.
When they were both finally clean, Wireface got out first, wrapping a towel around his waist and grabbing another for Coat guy, he held it out for him wrapping it around him once Coat guy got out, Coat guy shivered some as water dripped down his body.
Wireface grabbed another towel, starting to dry Coat guys hair for him. When it was as dry as he could manage to get it with a towel, he rummaged through drawers until he found a hair dryer plugging it in.
Wireface dried Coat guys hair with care gently combing his fingers through it. Then Wireface dried his own hair. When he finished, Wireface wrapped an arm around Coat guy smiled as he looked at their reflections in the mirror. Wireface was happy with his handiwork while Coat guy shivered beside him leaning into his warmth.
After all this... Wireface also put both their clothes in the wash... Leaving Coat guy to stare at him, frowning with multiple towels wrapped around himself, trying to stay warm. Coat guy avoided him for a few days... He will never admit that having his clothes clean and himself clean was actually nice. 🦎
Coat Guy Jacket Headcanons
100% a weighted jacket that is comforting to him.
Definitely baggy, larger size than needed purely for comfort, and so it wraps around him better.
Definitely has a few parts where the seams are starting to come apart.
Stains, and not the best smelling since he can't stand being without it.
Blood on his shoulder from hugging Wireface for warmth.
Lots of cat fur around the cuffs of his sleeve from using the cat as a handwarmer every chance he gets.
Big pockets, as well as secret pockets on the inside.
Pockets are filled with little things the cat has brought to him that he swears to treasure forever. (As well as things wireface has given him, like a rusting piece of wire that used to be holding his mouth shut.)
Coat Guy X Esenin (Bar Guy)
Purely Fluff 🦎
Coat guy shivered and trembled as it felt like the coldness ate him alive.. He longed for the comfort of warmth, to feel as though he had a friend, for the loneliness to go away.. Even whilst he sat next to the tall man, he felt alone. He glanced over at the man sitting beside him for a few minutes before quickly turning his head away. "You know.. You keep staring at me.. Do you have something to say?" Esenin questioned, turning to look at Coat guy. He quickly shook his head. "N-No!.. S-sorry for st-staring.." He mumbled as he looked down at the ground. He felt embarrassed for being caught looking at him, but the warmth that flooded his cheeks felt nice.. An inkling of warmth. Esenin sighed and slung his arm around Coat guy suddenly, pulling him close. "You look like you're freezing.. And I feel like I'm melting.. I'm sure being near each other should help out." Esenin stated, shutting his eyes. Coat guy went to say something but stopped himself. The warmth radiating off the man was nice.. He found himself leaning into it with a soft sigh. Before he knew it, he had fallen asleep.