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My natal Saturn is retrograde in Pisces in the 3rd house, ruled by Uranus in the 2nd house. So my default setting used to be running myself ragged. I was always super quick to share intimacy, validate everyone else’s egos, put myself on the back burner, and be the personal hype squad for people who can't celebrate themselves without an audience.

But nooowww, this current transit has Saturn Rx moving through Aries in my 4th house alongside Neptune, and the reality check is loud as hell boooyy 😮‍💨

The people closest to me are STILL expecting me to show up as my old ghost… They want access to my inner world just because we share DNA or history, feeling entitled to the old version of me who absorbed everything like a sponge. Especially the ones who run from accountability. They’d use whatever I’m personally into to bypass owning their own actions, hoping I’ll match their excitement and look the other way while also sweeping things under the rug.

I think it’s hilarious 🙃

The exact second I lay down a boundary and stand firmly in it, I’m suddenly the “bad guy”. I’m “selfish”. Everyone expects a 24/7 open-door policy, but the moment I actually need reciprocity? Crickets.

And like… do I still feel a lil pang of guilt when I say no to the people I love? Absolutely. But to be completely honest, I’ve never been happier. I feel MORE at peace within my own energy than I ever did while lighting myself on fire to keep everyone else warm.

So what’s Saturn Rx teaching me so far?

My therapist said she believes I will seek clarity from within by practicing deep breathing exercises, and she taught me a technique I can use. It was like something in my world shattered, because it’s almost the exact same technique I use when I’m smoking weed. She showed me how I can access that state without it, and I’m still processing how I feel about that. There’s a piece of me that feels like it’s been shown the exit, and now I know exactly how to get there and out to the other side. But then there’s another piece of me afraid to take that leap: What if the changes I make create a huge ripple effect that those around me aren’t ready for? Will I get blamed as the catalyst? Will they respect me, or will things just stay the same—with the only difference being how distant we are now?

I’m excited to embark on this journey, but I’m also kind of nervous..

Now I’m currently in my room, searching up hip stretching exercises on YouTube to release all this sudden tension or energy from my hips and lower back.

Did yall know that traditional Korean timekeeping uses the 12 zodiac animals to mark the hours, similar to how Western astrology uses planetary hours?

For example:

Rat Hour (11:00 PM - 1:00 AM):

According to the shamans in Korea, this is the eerie window when the spirit gates open and ghosts can possess people 🫨 I found out how they like to hide in the host's body, and how it can come off as the host having personality disorder or bipolar disorder the way the ghost be in and out

I was gagged when I heard about it!!

Lowkey started connecting some dots