warnings: mental illness, cursingÂ
The sun warmed Oliviaâs face as she stared out the window. She could see the birds flying around and the other kids running around the yard. She shifted in her seat, her gaze darting to her therapist before returning to the window. He continued droning one about things she no longer cared about. After meeting here three times a week for the past two years, nothing he said was of interest to her anymore.
  âOlivia.â The stern voice brought her back to him, âIf you donât start listening, youâre only going to be stuck here longer.â
  âI just donât get the point,â she huffed, âI stick to the schedule, I stick to those little exercises you teach me. I know just as well as you do that Iâm never getting out. â
  The therapist crossed his legs and wrote something in a little notebook.
âYou do remember why youâre here, correct?â
  Memories flashed through her mind. Her parents screaming. Her sisterâs pale face.
âDo you believe you should be released?â Her therapist continued as she scrawled out more notes.
      A warm tingling sensation ran through her fingers. There had been so much blood. A metallic taste filled her mouth as she chewed on her bottom lip.
      âNoâ she whispered
      âAnd why not?â He looked over his glasses at her.
      She took a shaky breath, squeezing her hands into fists.
      âIâm a danger to everyone around me.â She repeated the rehearsed lines.
      He nodded, writing more notes down before folding the notebook and looking up at her.
      âHave you noticed any changes since youâve been able to admit this?â
      She hesitated, glancing around the small office. The brightly colored walls made it harder to tune out the world though.
      âOlivia,â he demanded, âare you still seeing her.â
      âGo on, answer him.â A girlâs voice spoke up beside her.
      Olivia shook her head, ignoring the small child besides her. Her sister pressed up closer to her, leaning into Olivia.
      âWorried heâs going to think youâre a bigger nutcase than you already are?â
      Tami laughed as she stood, walking around the room. Oliviaâs gaze carefully following her.
      âNever got why you like these meetings.â She stepped in front of the therapist, curiously staring at him, âHeâs always seemed like an arrogant ass. And creepy.â She shuddered, laughing.
      âWhat do you see?â With such a simple interruption, Tami was gone again.
      âNothing.â She reassured, adding a small smile.
      His gaze turned skeptical as he reached for the notebook.
      âA fly.â she blurted out, âI thought there was a fly.â
      He sighed and placed the notebook on the table next to him. Drumming his fingers against his leg, he kept his gaze trained on Olivia. Her leg started to bounce against the floor as she looked everywhere but his piercing eyes.
      A knock at the door saved her. A small face peeked through the crack as Oliviaâs nurse peered in.
      âDr. Marks, Iâm here for Olivia.â Her voice soothed Oliviaâs nerves.
      Dr. Marks looked down at his watched and waved both away.
      âSo, it appears, see you in a couple days Olivia.â His gaze looked over her as she was led out of his office.
      âJesus, wish theyâd give ya a new therapist.â Mrs. Marse said as she closed the door.
      Olivia shrugged. Sheâd heard about why heâd gotten transferred from some other hospital. Honestly, she neverminded the hot glances or lingering touches. It was one of the few things about this place that made her still feel human.
      âWow, thatâs depressing.â Her sister reappeared besides her.
      Olivia rolled her eyes and kept her gaze focused down the sterile hall. A red head poked around the corner of her vision, blinking up at her.
      âYou realize ignoring me wonât make me disappear.â
      âMaybe not but I can try.â She retorted, ignoring her nursesâ side glance.
      âAlright hun, youâve got about 15 minutes of free-time before dinner.â
      Olivia thanked her before walking through the double doors.
      The room opened to a large rec room. It was filled with the patience that werenât allowed outside. Those that were also deemed to dangerous for society. Most of them stuck to themselves at the tables or sitting around the couches. All ignored the tv blaring some black and white cartoons. Â
      Olivia sat at one of the unoccupied tables, grabbing at some of the papers and crayons that were set out. She had already started drawing the flock of birds when her sister sat next to her.
      âThey canât even give you real pencils?â She questioned as she held up one of the crayons.
      Olivia shrugged in response.
      âTheyâd rather someone not go all murderer with them.â She answered, filling in her sky.
      âAh, someone like you then.â Tami smiled before throwing the crayon at her.
      âWhat the hell Tami?â Olivia reached up to where her cheek was stinging, tears forming in the corner of her eyes.
      She leaned over her chair to pick it up but couldnât find it. Looking all around her, she returned to the table, where the same purple crayon was sitting in front of her.
      With a sigh she lowered her hand. The sting in her cheek disappearing as quickly as it appeared.
      âYou really are a nutcase, arenât ya.â Tami laughed.
      âYou are such a-â
      âDinnerâ a nurse called on the opposite side of the room.
      Olivia ignored it and kept coloring in her picture, listening to the scraping of chairs and squeaking of couches as the other patients moved to the nurses.
      âChrisâ a nurse confirmed.
      Olivia mocked a checkmark on her paper. Sheâd seen these routines enough times that she didnât need to watch. After checking off the name, the nurse would turn to her partner that carried the tray of colorful pills. Then she would pick up the one that matched whichever patient had reached her first. Sheâd hand them the pills then the cup of water. After watching them swallow both, the nurse would open one of the large double doors and then the cycle would repeat.
      She drew feathers throughout her birds, smiling as she was almost finished with them. Olivia tried to imagine the breeze that would carry her birds throughout their skies. Closing her eye, she tried to picture it. Lying on the grass as kids laughed around her, birds cawing in the sky. Opening her eyes again she realized she was back at her old school. Other students ran around the yard, making up the laughter.
      Spread out around her were her school supplies. She went to pick up her sketchbook when pain blossomed from her side. Grabbing at her side she coughed, trying to catch her breath. Looking around she saw a group of kids pointing and laughing at her, leading that group was her sister Tami.
      She clenched her shaking fists before standing up. Her body shook with each stomp towards the group. When she got there, she couldnât help the hard shove she gave Tami.
      âDonât touch me, you freak.â She growled out at her.
      âQuit throwing things at me then.â Olivia yelled back.
Tamiâs friends just laughed harder at this exchange.
âWho are you talking to?â one of the friends called out.
âMy sister?â she question, thrusting a hand towards Tami.
âI donât see anyone.â Another friend answered, causing the rest to break out in more giggles.
Tami smirked and placed her hands on her hips.
âSee, told you I wasnât real, nutcase.â
Olivia turned and marched away, shaking her head.
âYour sister is a real bitch.â Her friend, Katie, said to her.
âYou see her, too right?â Olivia whispered
Katie wrapped her tanned arms around Olivia, pulling her into a big hug.
âYeah I do, and someone needs to knock her down a peg too.â Katie said before flipping off the friends behind them.
Olivia jerked out of her memories when she felt a hand on her shoulder.
âPill timeâ the blond nurse said.
She looked around and saw the rec room was completely empty aside from her and the two nurses. Olivia nodded reaching a shaky hand out to the pills and water. After steadying her shaky breath, she downed the pills and water, looking over her sister. Tami was sitting on the table, swinging her legs while snapping crayons.
âBye Tami.â The goodbye was answered with a chuckle and a middle finger.
Rolling her eyes, Olivia stood and walked into the cafeteria with the nurses.