picture perfect

I did eventually. Mom was super pissed but at least my hair is cute. And honestly, I’d rather stab my eye out than be holed up with you and your boy surrounded by your loveydoveyness. But thanks for the offer.

“eh, mom’s done it plenty of times to us. she’s fine. hey! to be fair, more often than not peter is working, and so am i, so like - it’s not as much as you’d think it’d be.”

I need to move out of here. A girl apparently cannot get any privacy when trying to re-dye her hair. I just want to sing along to my music and dye my hair pink but instead everyone needs to use the bathroom. 

“that’s when you lock the door and turn your music so loud you can’t hear anyone. no need to let them use the bathroom if you can’t hear anything. or - you could always come to our place.”

&&. instagram : lilialynn uploaded a new photo 

10/10 balcony for taking pics thanks to shawn. dress i made in an hour thanks to me. spontaneous tattoo at 2 am thanks to this guy named joe. nyc is wild and i’m loving every moment of it. 

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✐ 96 comments

Willa: {read at 6:06 pm}

Willa: fucking fine. im sick of fighting with you. when i do come home, i'll make sure not not include you in the memo i guess. not like you'd end up being happy to see me. so since you're done, im done fucking trying to fix it. it's not worth the energy or time.

Willa: and im sure you also think this conversation is also just a waste of your time too.

lilia: this isn't fighting, this is me telling you what's fucking real and you not being able to swallow that. why the FUCK would i be happy to see you???? after everything youve done and said????? ill be home, or at my apartment, because yknow, i actually enjoy and value being with my family.

lilia: i literally cannot believe youre acting like this. prove my 'youre not sorry' point more, why don't you? you're a fucking child. grow the fuck up. if you WERE sorry, you would work harder at trying to fucking fix the absolute disaster you caused, not a halfass text telling me you're sorry and that you 'very well might' come home. solid effort, though, princess.

Willa: idk cause im your sister? and blood is thicker than water.

Willa: funny you say plane when the plan was to drive there, but yknow you don't need your facts straight.

Willa: i don't plan on getting shit handed to me, Lilia. Do you really think that i got NYADA handed to me? I've been working at that for years. they don't just take in anyone.

Willa: fine don't take my apology, don't see that im fucking trying here because i've felt like my inside have been eating me from the inside out the past few days, thinking that everyone hates me, and that if i just say the wrong thing now, that i'm going to lose another family member.

lilia: i dont know who the FUCK you think you're using the fucking sister card on right now but it sure as all fucking hELL better not be me. you lost the fucking right to use that card the literal SECOND you started doubting me and my relationship without even a second fucking thought. and that card DISINTEGRATED the moment you told me you weren't coming back. you are absolutely nothing more than a person i share my dna with now. i don't give a flying fuck what anyone has to say about it, esp not you.

lilia: why the fuck does that even matter????????? plane, car, whatever the fuck youre using to fucking get there. i don't really give a fuck. it's the same fucking principal. fuck off with that shit immediately.

lilia: HAHAHAHA girl. fuck that. maybe you got into nyada on your own, but who the fucks paying all those fat ass bills?????? sure as hell know you don't have enough saved up for it and waitressing at a drag bar isn't going to cut it.

Willa: even if i said i *will* come home for breaks would you believe me?

Willa: I never said you had to apologize for anything. i'm not asking for an apology from you. I'm asking you to at least talk to me and not be short with me.

Willa: I wish i could take back everything i said i really fucking do. but i can't.

Willa: just know that i'm trying...please.

lilia: why the hell would i? you broke every last bit of trust i had in you, smashed it, shattered it into a million pieces. why the fuck NOW after MONTHS would i believe that you truly mean that.

lilia: all you're trying to do now is diffuse the situation, stop the shit you had coming since day one because you cannot handle conflict. i know for a damn fucking fact the second that plane takes off lima, your family, and everyone else will be in your rear view and you will never look back again. thats what you said after all, isnt it? the fuck makes you think that i'm forgetting about any of what you said to me? honestly, how the fuck could i.

lilia: do you not count this as talking? you deserve for me to be short with you, since i don't owe you SHIT for how you've been fucking treating me for the past almost year of our lives.

lilia: this is not just a 'lack of communication skills' as mom said. this is me being absolutely fucking fed up with your princess level shit. you do not just get every single thing in life handed to you, you'll learn that fucking FAST in new york, so let this be a lesson for you. you fuck up there? you're over. i gave you chances, i let you talk to me in a way i have never let anyone talk to me EVER, and i am fucking DONE. DONE. mark those words, willa. i am DONE letting you walk on me, and walk on this family, and walk on shawn. figure your shit out on your own, come back, don't. i dont give a fuck anymore since clearly my opinion and my being doesn't fucking matter.

Willa: i'm gonna start out with, you don't have to reply to this. I just need to apologize.

Willa: I was being selfish thinking going to new york that i would never come home.

Willa: but the last few days i've felt like i lost everything. mostly my best friend.

Willa: And in the last few days i've really had time to think about everything and how me not coming home would affect everyone. and there is a very high likely chance that i will come home for breaks.

Willa: i know you probably wont accept this, or even reply..but i just had to let you know..

lilia: damn right you were. and it's sad that you couldn't see that before. that you had to go off and think you were the victim like you always do, even when you KNEW you were in the wrong. you really should have thought about it before, but thats fine.

lilia: "very high likely chance" that sentence should be changed to "i WILL come home for breaks because i realized that i am not the only person in this world, and the family that has given me everything deserves to be respected and seen."

lilia: what you did was fucked up. what you SAID was fucked up. all of it, the shit with peter months ago, the shit you said now. i've bit my tongue for goddamn forever but this just happened to be my last straw and you damn well know i'm not apologizing for anything i did or said. you fucked up.