I Don’t Know What To Put Here

Shane is playing with the curls at Ilya's neck. He's laughing at a joke from Luca. He rolls his eyes at a chirp from Ilya who in turn presses an exaggerated kiss to his cheek. He's playing mario kart with Wyatt and Young at some point, all of them yelling and swearing loudly. He's holding Ilya's hand in both of his. He's talking to Harris about going back to the restaurant they went to the other day, you guys want to join us? He's hooking his ankle over Ilya's. He's beaming at Harris as he takes a picture of the couple. He's grinning at something Ilya whispers to him in Russia.

After dinner, Hayden's standing on the patio with a beer in his hand watching as Shane and Ilya chase each other around Bood's yard, a spectacle that is accompanied by loud cheers from the rookies that are watching them. At one point Shane full on tackles Ilya and they end up on the grass laughing and wrestling. Wyatt whoops and shouts "Hollzy Rozy wrestling championship back the fuck on!" joining the rookies, half of them chanting "Rozy" while the other is chanting "Hollzy".

- investment portfolio

- asking the coffee shop if the tea bags are plastic free

- unclenching his jaw

- curating an evening instacart order

- sucking cock

- tile shopping

- observing husbands fashion haul

- saying “yes, baby”

- collecting air miles

- 9 year old iphone note ranking hotel towels

- Oh that's Gaga. You know Lady Gaga? Of course, Ilya! She was in A star is born. Really good actress. She is more of a singer actually... Oh yeah that makes sense, I guess. You guess?! Please tell me you know Poker Face, lyubimyy. I know for a fact you have been to a club, you must have heard Poker Face before. I don't know, maybe. [Ilya starts singing Poker Face]. You're lucky you play better hockey than you sing, baby. Oi!!

- Oh I know how him! That's Armando! That's Pitbull. I'm pretty sure that's a human? Are you fucking with me Shanya. Of course baby. I know that he is a rapper but it feels so weird to call him Pitbull, when we met in Miami he said he was Armando. You met in Miami?? Yeah well, was a few years ago, he invited our team to this house- Pitbull invited the Montreal boring fucking Metros to his fucking house???

- Kesha! Do you know her songs? Absolutely none, no. How the fuck- Why am I even suprised you know her too. Oh we met at Roses birthday party in LA. She is so funny, I think you would like her! Maybe I should introduce you. What the fuck- You know what, I call her. Shane!

- Oh that's Kayleigh right? Kayleigh. Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's her. That's Chappell Roan. Dykstra is playing her non-stop in the lockerroom. Oh, really? Pink Pony Club? Good Luck, Babe? Casual? Sounds familiar yes. [Ilya starts singing Casual] [Shane blushes] I think... I think I remember now yeah. Didn't know that was Kayleigh. How do you know all these people but have no clue what they do? Oh funny story, she is a good friend of Rose actually-

- Oh, that's Sam! Sam Smith. I've been to a concert. Met backstage. Really cool person. Shanya, you're surprising me? You go to concerts? Well uhm. When... when I was with Rose she got us tickets and - Yeah okey.

- Montero! Or Lil Nas X. Shall I guess: Another friend of Rose? Maybe, I should ask her. Actually we did this campaign together and- I hate you.

- Oh thats the actress from the movie. The movie with all the actresses. Oceans Eight. That's Rihanna. Yeah! Rihanna. I really liked her there, she should do more movies. Shane, she is actually a singer. Oh, that's cool. You're killing me. What? Should I know her? Shane. Lyubimyy. We literally had our first dance to her song.

Consider: baby Shane who pronounces ‘puck’ as ‘fuck’. Like. Teeny (fat) baby. He’s about 14-15 months and in Yuna’s arms watching a hockey game on TV.

“MAMA FUCK!”

“Yes, sweetie. PUCK.” *glances at her in-laws awkwardly.”

He’s almost two and running around with a baby hockey stick, and a cousin takes it.

“My fuck my fuck my fuck!”

Confused, Shane immediately calls him.

"Is this some new and unique way to psych me out before the final, Rozanov? I didn't know you had money on Detroit."

"No, I am sending for a good reason," Ilya laughs. "I know it sucks for us that when you win all your team will be kissing their girlfriends and Pike will be making out all gross with Jackie, and we will not be able to. So, I wanted to show you exactly where I first kissed the cup. It was on the top, right over where it says Ottawa 1905, left of where it says 'Challenge Cup'. I remember because I did this on purpose. We weren't anything then, but I was thinking of you. I couldn't help thinking of you. So if you kiss the same place, it will be a little like we are sharing a kiss. And only we will know about it."

And Shane feels the air clean knocked out of his lungs and the back of his throat get tight, as he barely gets out, "Baby, that's... Thank you. I don't know what to say. I love you so fucking much. I'll make sure you see our kiss, okay?"

"I will be watching. I love you, My Shane. Go show the world why Shane Fucking Hollander is the goat, okay?"

On the night Shane wins his third Stanley Cup, he kisses their spot on the cup, thinking only of Ilya, and longs for a day where he can pull him onto the ice like Scott did with Kip.